Afternoon Quick Ums

rocky25

My wife snores really loudly.

Apparently she had her nose broken when she was younger.

But it didn't teach her, she still snores very loudly.

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After reading that 'smoking caused cancer in laboratory rats and mice',

I have decided to leave my cigarettes on a high shelf, where the rats and mice can't get them.

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The Zutons' bass player, Russell, mentioned once in an interview that he liked Maltesers.

At his next gig, he was bombarded with Maltese’s.

Well, I happen to know that Ronan Keating is a bottle and daggers man.

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My granddad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed.

"It's worth spending money on good speakers," he told me.

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George W Bush and Gordon Brown are shown a time machine which can see 100 years into the future.

The both decide to test it by asking a question each. George goes first

"What will the USA be like in 100 years time"

The machine whirrs and beeps and goes into action and gives him a printout, he reads it out

"The country is in good hands under the new president,

Crime is non-existent,

There is no conflict,

The economy is healthy.

There are no worries"

Gordon Brown thinks

"It’s not bad this time machine,

I'll have a bit of that" so he asks

"What will Britain be like in 100 years time?"

The machine whirrs and beeps and goes into action, and he gets a printout.

But he just stares at it.

"Come on Gordon" says George,

"Share what it says"

"I can't! It’s all in Arabic!"

GAAman

Class as usual rock

dh0661

rocky25 wrote: »

My wife snores really loudly.
Apparently she had her nose broken when she was younger.
But it didn't teach her, she still snores very loudly.

I wonder what she thinks when you break wind :rolleyes:

rocky25

dh0661 wrote: »

I wonder what she thinks when you break wind :rolleyes:

Lolz

I just blame the Dogs :rolleyes: