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Friday Funums

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  • 10-10-2008 9:50pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,521 ✭✭✭


    The sexual position formerly known as "the 69" is now called "the 96".

    Due to inflation, the cost of eating out has gone up.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    I was in the pub last night when the barman asked me,

    “How come I never see you in here with Pete any more?”

    I asked him,

    “Would you drink with a bloke who's a liar, always late, borrows money he never pays back, always tries to squirm out of his round, jealous of everything you have, and when your back is turned he tries to fook your wife and daughter?”

    “Bloody hell! No!” he said, somewhat flabbergasted.

    “Well, neither would Pete,” I added.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Well," say’s Fred,

    "truth be known,

    I'm just bored with screwin' the same hole night after night after night.

    I guess I'm hankering' for a bit of variety."

    Jim replied,

    "Well, if you want variety,

    why don't you just, you know, turn her over every now and again?"

    Fred says, "What?

    And have a house full of kids?"

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    A vicar is masturbating in the bedroom.

    As he finishes he turns round to see the window cleaner staring at him.

    Red faced he rushes downstairs to answer the door.

    "I’ve done your windows vicar that will be €100" says the window cleaner with a sly wink and a nudge.

    Quickly the vicar pays him and shuts the door.

    The vicars’ wife who had been listening shouts a 100 fooking Euro for 4 small windows.

    He must have seen you coming.


Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 2,630 ✭✭✭dh0661


    rocky25 wrote: »
    The sexual position formerly known as "the 69" is now called "the 96".

    And after next weeks budget will probably be called "the 99" :D - everyone will be struggling to get on top :rolleyes:.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,370 ✭✭✭GAAman


    Class ones rock and dh0661 :D


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