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Girls today....
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Aisling(",) wrote: »i think alot of it was because a few of us were on the pill and knew that combined with condoms it was fairly safe.not advocating it just saying that it does happens.
theres 3 3rd years in my school pregnant at the moment two are 14 one is 15.though i was active at that act in hindsight is just so wrong.
Yeah, hindsight is 20/20.
Although I wasn't actually having penetrative sex at 15, I was still pretty active in other ways and now that I look back I was horrendously immature.
It's bizarre, at 15 you think you're the most mature person in the world but looking back just a few years later ya realise how wrong you were. I'm sure I'll look back at this post in 4 years time and think I was a spanner at 19 too but sure, at least now I'm better educated and taking the necessary precautions!
Also, what would your parents attitudes towards sex be? My mother can be terribly conservative really. It came up that I was sleeping with my boyfriend and she nearly cried. I know it's only natural to be concerned but she just looked so so disappointed with me. I think that's a bad attitude to have really, although I think alot of it would still be catholic guilt.0 -
Yeah, hindsight is 20/20. Although I wasn't actually having penetrative sex at 15, I was still pretty active in other ways and now that I look back I was horrendously immature.
It's bizarre, at 15 you think you're the most mature person in the world but looking back just a few years later ya realise how wrong you were. I'm sure I'll look back at this post in 4 years time and think I was a spanner at 19 too but sure, at least now I'm better educated and taking the necessary precautions!
Also, what would your parents attitudes towards sex be? My mother can be terribly conservative really. It came up that I was sleeping with my boyfriend and she nearly cried. I know it's only natural to be concerned but she just looked so so disappointed with me. I think that's a bad attitude to have really, although I think alot of it would still be catholic guilt.
aye like i know in a few years ill look back at things im doing now and think its madness but at the moment they make sense!
ah my dad has never mentioned sex around me ever but it think thats because im his youngest and it would be very out of caracter for him to do it.my mam said it to me when i went on the pill when i was younger for period pains but basically she was like jsut dont do it.think she also said i cant have sex till im in my mid 20's
if she asked me straight out id have no problem admitting it to her but as it will never come up im not broaching that aqward subject myself....also a high chance ill be sent to confession:rolleyes:
theyre not fans of extra marital sex in general.0 -
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My Dad worries that I "probably don't get laid enough". My Mam doesn't care as long as I stay 'safe' and don't tell her about it. Of course I'm a bloke so that's beside the point. Although my mother's opinion on my sister is the same. Not sure what Dad thinks on that matter and TBH I aint gonna ask.
Lol, dad's are great!
Neither of my parents have ever hassled me over it or even really brought it up tbh. They wouldn't be conservative either so I don't think it was awkwardness or anything more just them having faith in my common sense (at least I hope it was).
Then again I have been with my girlfriend for very nearly 6 years so it's not like there's any doubt in there mind!0 -
I think the morning after pill for a women of any age is sad.
It's only sad if that's what a women (of 15 or any age) is using as a form of contraception -- as opposed to only using it when needed in an emergency situation, such as when the condom breaks or (heaven forbid) a rape occurs.Heck, in my parents generation young people's sex education consisted of what you heard from hearsay.
A lot of what teenagers learn about sex today is hearsay! Or they hear complete falsehoods from friends before they are formally taught the truth. I think it freaks out parents to talk to their children about it because it may not have been a topic that was freely discussed when they were that age, and also because they don't want to think their child (not my little John or Sarah!) would possibly need to know that kind of information when they're 11/12/13/14.
What's the topic again? Oh, right. So I don't really think it's too young to be having sex -- I mean, it used to be that if a woman didn't have children by the time she was in her 20s, she was an old spinster, right? But I think there's a huge gap in the kind of responsibility that was imposed on a woman then and the lack of responsibility that a lot of young women have now. It's even more disturbing since there is so much more information out there now in terms of contraception and health. Combine that with the kind of 'be-sexy-but-still-be-innocent' mixed messages that young women are receiving from all directions and it just seems as if we're handing them a machete, pointing her toward the jungle and saying 'good luck.'
I could blather about this all day, but I think I'm confusing issues . . . and myself . . .
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I have a 12 and 13 yr old both boys and i look at them and think they are still so childish.I dont mean that in a bad way but they still play games and are out playing football.I think it would be a travesty if they got active so young it would mean they lose their innocence.I was mo0re active kissing boys but i dont think theyve kissed a girl yet.I dont want to be a grandmother just yet im only 35.
Kids grow up too fast these days, hopefully your boys will stay that way for another couple of years at least 0 -
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Nah, but saying "the youth of today" is a bit old-sounding for someone in their early 20s...save_our_socks wrote: »am I getting a bit fuddy duddy in my early 20's by being shocked at this
I would - biologically speaking. They are physically developed and capable of being sexual. The concept of teen or even child past a certain very early age is relatively recent.That comes down to if you'd call a 15 year old a woman-i wouldn't.
Very stupid. So he goes for his annual test and discovers he has an STI - bit late to do anything about it then... :rolleyes:girl_friday wrote: »It was his opinion that a once a year check up and the MAP would be fine... I just hope it doesn't backfire on him!
Some people seem to think tests are the same as taking precautions.
Yep, I definitely believe there are. Tbh it's an alien concept to me but we shouldn't rule out the fact there are some very mature people in their mid teens who are in serious, loving relationships and taking all precautions. I'd say it's rare though...I'm sure some people are happy enough and capable of some sort of mature sexual relationship when they are 14/15
Depends on the 15-year-old. At 15 we have sexual needs... it's just how we go about fulfilling them is the clincher. A 15-year-old in a relationship and using contraception... well how can that be a bad thing? Seems quite a positive thing to me. I was getting sexual urges at 13 and only social conditioning prevented me from going out getting a ride. Then again, the thought of it was one thing... the actual act would probably have terrified me (again though, probably due to social conditioning).Alessandra wrote: »Call me old fashioned or whatnot, but I believe 15 is too young for children to be having sex.
Your grandparents seem like young grandparents! My grandparents... well I'm certain their view of the world would be very different to the above!One of the best conversations I ever had with my grandparents was one where they were honest and admitted that they did get up to all this stuff when they were kids too, none of the usual "that sort of thing never went on in our day" crap you get out of the elderly so much.
In fact some of the stories they had would get you jail time these days yet were just a source of amusement for the locals when they were teens.
And there was a time when girls were becoming mothers in their early teens - even pre teens.EamonnKeane wrote: »Biology begs to differ - menarche occurs earlier with each passing decade.
Yes, very good point. I know I'm making a case for the biological argument but social conditioning shouldn't be ignored either as it's obviously very powerful... and teens are kids today, not adults like they used to be.Combine that with the kind of 'be-sexy-but-still-be-innocent' mixed messages that young women are receiving from all directions and it just seems as if we're handing them a machete, pointing her toward the jungle and saying 'good luck.'
The way I feel about it is: safe, loving sex for teens - good. But probably rare.
Promiscuity, doing it because it's the thing to do etc among teens - not good. ****ed up at times. If the Wesley stories are true (and yes, you gotta be wary of the red top newspapers and the Daily Mail) then that "snowballing" stuff is seriously sad and disturbing...
Being complacent about it and saying it's only typical teenage carry-on - not good either. It shouldn't be forgotten that several of those teens who take part in stuff like giving blowjobs down a side alley, shagging a randomer in a public toilet... don't really want to do it.0 -
And what about the boys of today who are having sex with these girls? Teenage girls are as much under the influence of hormones as males are. I know we like to think that women have few sexual thoughts but I can tell you that that's blatant lies
It tires me to see that we're still on the same page of the book where the majority of the contraception/std prevention is landing on the female in the equation. Sure, biologically she has more responsibilities but does that mean that men get to shy away from it altogether?
There are some great men out there who are informed and make sure to use contraception but there are more than a few who will land all the responsibility on the female.
We need to recognise that men and women have an equal responsibility when it comes to contraception/std prevention.
We need better education for both sexes.
We need contraception to be cheaper/free.
We need more doctors who are well informed on contraception.
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I do know their was mention in the press recently of the male MAP ,hence my Q :rolleyes:
What possible use could a man have for the MAP?!
The way I feel about it is: safe, loving sex for teens - good. But probably rare.
Not as rare as you might think!Dudess wrote:Promiscuity, doing it because it's the thing to do etc among teens - not good. ****ed up at times.
Doing anything because it's "the done thing" is totally lame imho, but I've not seen this happen much with people I know. Promiscuity is asolutely fine if the people being promiscuous use protection.Dudess wrote:If the Wesley stories are true
For the most part they're not! There is very little difference between Wesley and any club in Dublin, most people just go there to dance and have fun with their friends, and there happen to be a couple of drunken sluts that get laughed at by everyone else there!And what about the boys of today who are having sex with these girls? Teenage girls are as much under the influence of hormones as males are. I know we like to think that women have few sexual thoughts but I can tell you that that's blatant lies
It tires me to see that we're still on the same page of the book where the majority of the contraception/std prevention is landing on the female in the equation. Sure, biologically she has more responsibilities but does that mean that men get to shy away from it altogether?
Yeah I agree the responsibility should be 50/50, but teenage girls tend to be more responsible and mature than teenage boys, and also have more to lose so will be more concerned about contraception.0 -
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