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Some things you just can't explain!!!

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  • 07-11-2008 10:57pm
    #1
    coldfire1x
    Registered Users Posts: 3,354 ✭✭✭


    A FARMER is sat in his local getting drunk when the barman wanders over
    and says: "Grateful as I am for the business, it's a beautiful day out
    there, why aren't you out there enjoying it?"
    The farmer shakes his head: "Some things you just can't explain."
    "Want to talk about it?" asks the barman, sensing a problem.
    "Sure," replies the farmer. "Earlier I was sat milking my cow and just as
    I got the bucket full she lifted her leg and kicked the whole lot over."
    "That's not so bad," says the barman.
    "That's what I thought," replies the farmer. "After all, some things you
    just can't explain."
    "So what happened then?" asks the barman.
    "Well, I took her left leg and tied it to a post," explains the farmer.
    "But just a few minutes later her right leg kicked the bucket over again!"
    "Some things you just can't explain, eh?" laughs the barman.
    "Right," says the farmer. "So I tied that leg to another post, started
    milking again and then her tail knocks the bucket over!"
    "So what did you do?" asks the barman.
    "Well, I'd run out of rope by then," says the farmer. "So I took my belt
    off and tied her tail to the rafter. Then my pants fell down and the wife
    walked in....and well, like I said, some things you just can't explain."

    GIRL: I have done a great sin. I called my boyfriend a B*STARD.
    PSYCHIATRIST: Well now, that's not a nice thing to call anyone, so
    what did he do to deserve that?


    GIRL: Well, he kissed me.
    PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this?

    GIRL: .. Yes!
    PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a B*STARD.

    GIRL: But, he put his hand in my top.
    PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this?

    GIRL: Yes!
    PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a BAST*RD.

    GIRL: But, he took my clothes off.
    PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this?

    GIRL: Yes!
    PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a B*STARD.

    GIRL: But, he had s*x with me!
    PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this?

    GIRL: .Yes!
    PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a B*STARD.

    GIRL: But, he told me he has A*DS.
    PSYCHIATRIST: B*STARD!!!!!


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