Banter at Football Grounds

monkey9

Des's story in the RTE Panel thread about abusing Pat Dolan at a Shels game and Dolan turning around to him, giving him the *****r gesture made me laugh.
Just wanted to hear of other stories or funny banter that people have heard while at matches.


I was at the Pat's - Bohs cup semi final at Richmond Pk a few weeks ago and our then Polish midfielder was having a nightmare (as usual). A couple of times he knelt down to tie his laces and someone shouted "look, he can't even tie his laces properly. The instructions were probably in f*cking english".

Or Owen Heary in the same match near the sideline and one person in particular was abusing him for about thirty seconds, calling him all sorts of names. Then, after all this torrent of abuse, he pauses and quite calmy says...."great goal though"

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My favourite football story.

Shels played Cork City in the FAI Cup in the 2007 Season (our first season in the First Division) at Tolka.

In the second half, I went right down to the wall along the main stand and hurled all kinds of abuse at Liam Kearney. It visibly affected his game, he's a winger, and spent most of the half edging closer to the midfield than actually on the wing. Some of my abuse even made the City bench laugh, but most of it was just a vitroilic rant, spittle coming out of my mouth. I'd had a few.

Anyway.

Fast forward to last seaon's cup final. Cork City vs Lonford. I went with a few Cork buddies of mine from Boards. Headed along to the Cork City after party, met Liam at the bar, asked him if he remembered that day in Tolka, his response was classic "Yeah, I always wondered what did I do to that guy, murder his family or something". I told him it was me, and he was more than happy to shake my hand and tell me fair play. Fecker never bought me a pint though.

Draupnir

I remember being at a game between Bohs and Longford (nearly sure it was Longford) about 6 years ago in Dalymount. The Longford physio was a big hefty lady of about 35 years of age. Anytime a Longford player went down injured she would charge onto the pitch with the chesticles smacking her in the face, all the while the Bohs fans were shouting "Quick, she's coming to get you" etc. Very, very funny.

Xavi6

Probably the best game I ever attended was a few years back between Shels and Bohs at Dalyer. My best mate and fellow boardsie MrJoeSoap and myself decided it would be a bit of craic to sit at the front of the shed. We had our colours covered til just after kick off then whipped out the Shels jerseys.

Our move looked like backfiring when Shels were getting destroyed and we were getting pelted by chips, coke bottles and anything else the Bohs massive could get their hands on. Queue the most fantastic comeback ever by us to 5-4 up. Well, we milked it, turning around to the shed to give the fingers and **** gestures. We made the sensibel decision to head towards the exits as injury time approached. Just as we left our seats Davy Byrne banged in a 6th. Again out came the fingers and **** gestures before we legged it as the final whistle went.

Fantastic night!

Mr Alan

Myself and my mate had a bit of a row with Phil Neal & Michael Thomas at the Liverpool Benefica match a few years ago. They were sitting behind us and kept giving out **** cause we were standing & singing. Pair of ***** tbh (Thomas wasnt as bad as Neal).

Neal even had the audacity to be slating the team during the game & giving out to me and my mate saying "its a football match, not a singing competition"-tosser is permanently waxing lyrical about how inspirational the fans were during his time at the club.

shame

Ronan|Raven

The day Glen Crowe called me a cúnt Longford had just scored their third goal of the night afair and the ball landed near me after being kicked up the pitch by the bohs goalie, Glen comes over to get ball to take tip off, I hand it to him remarking (jokingly ) that if he could play for Ireland so could I.

stovelid

Tony Grant getting the pig's head treatment probably took 'banter' to a new extreme, but it was funny.

Funniest one last season was when Rovers played - I think - Bray, at Tolka and they had a player (Mccabe?) sent off. He was getting a fair bit of abuse from the Lego as he walked off, but did a come-on-then-have-a-go stance at the crowd. Have to respect him, made me laugh.

therecklessone

After Steed Malbranque moved to Spurs from Fulham (around the time rumours started to circulate that he had a row with Chris Coleman because Coleman used to slag him about his tiny cock, so Steed arranged a cock extension before making his debut for us) I spent a year shouting "hit him with your mickey!" every time somebody tackled him. Raised a few chuckles.

During our game vs Anorthosis Famagusta in last season's UEFA Cup, the "travelling support" (most were London-based Greek-Cypriots, and quite a few were Gooners) started waving an Arsenal shirt at us, which prompted some of our Turkish-Cypriot support to whip out a Turkish flag, and me to start a chant of "small team from Turkey". The three Greek-Cypriots who sit near me pissed themselves laughing, as they are used to my foul-mouthed outbursts.

Indeed, during one game last season the bloke sitting in front of me turned around hin his seat and asked was I ok, as I hadn't turned the air blue yet and we were 15 minutes into the 2nd half...:o

Oh, and I was once approached by a stranger in a pub who offered to buy me a beer which left me a bit until he explained that he recognised me from the support we took to the Emirates for the 3-1 defeat in the Carling Cup SF two seasons ago...he was particularly impressed that I'd spent the entire 30mins of extra-time with my back to the action hurling abuse up at an Arsenal fan with big ears in the upper tier...:P

Drink was taken on all occasions.

therecklessone

Also, was at Tolka Park years ago (Rico-era) for a Shels-Rovers game, me and my mate used to sit in front of the press seats every week and these two plonkers sat directly in front of us and always slated the Shels players.

Ray Duffy was the subject of their ire this particular night, so myself and my mate decided to counter by praising his every touch.

"Silky smooth skills Razor"
"That's it Duffy, like watching Brazil"

The two jokers thought we were taking the piss out of Ray, then eventually realised we were taking the piss out of them. Never saw them at a game again...:D

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Cursing at football?

Won't someone think of the children

:rolleyes:

therecklessone

Des wrote: »

Cursing at football?

Won't someone think of the children

:rolleyes:

I was about to say fcuk the children but then worried how people might take it...;)

showry

Cobh v Blues friendly a couple of years back.
A few of us were giving their full back dog's abuse so he responded with the v sign to which one of the lads said "Very professional number 2". He lost the rag then and started to swear at us before realising the ref was beside him so it came out as "Why don't you just ... pooop?". Cue cries of "poooop" in high pitched cork accents every time he got near the ball for the rest of the game.
Maybe you had to be there.

Alan Matthews once requested I be moved from behind the dugout up at Longford a few years ago and our own physio successfully had me thrown out of the RSC during the Mike Flanagan era.

Fratton Fred

I used to watch reading quite a bit, pre Mad Stad days and they had some mad supporters, maybe it was because giving people abuse was a lot more entertaining than watching the football.

there were a group of guys who would always dress up for a match. Gorilla outfits were their norm, but they would put on curly wigs and taches for the tranmere games, sheep for the games against Welsh teams etc but i think their best was against Bradford when they all wore a Sari.

The same heroes also wore Balaclavas and combats to the infamous game at Lansdowne road and managed to get their phots on the front page of the Sun with a wanted sign underneath them, even though they didn't do a thing wrong (I think they misjudged that one a bit)

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subtle racism ftw