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Happy Xmas

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  • 03-12-2008 9:35pm
    #1
    galwayrush
    Registered Users Posts: 12,815 ✭✭✭✭


    He laid her on the table, so white clean and bare.
    His forehead wet with beads of sweat, he rubbed her here and there.
    He touched her neck and then felt her breast, and then drooling felt her thigh.
    The slit was wet and all was set, he gave a joyous cry.
    The hole was wide... He looked inside, all was dark and murky.
    He rubbed his hands and stretched his arm and then he stuffed the turkey.

    May I be the first to wish you and your dirty little minds a very MERRY CHRISTMAS!! :D


Comments

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    #2
    giggsy664
    Registered Users Posts: 2,457 ✭✭✭giggsy664


    Hahahaha...

    I don't get it.


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    #3
    burberry
    Registered Users Posts: 57 ✭✭burberry


    daaaaaaaaa, stuffing the turkey


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    #4
    ben bedlam
    Closed Accounts Posts: 261 ✭✭ben bedlam


    I think that what the OP is doing in that post is that upon reading it, one interprets the text to be full of sexual innuendo, but then at the end the OP cleverly creates a twist in the poem to mean it is something as mundane as stuffing a turkey. It is incredibly witty and smart.


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    #5
    rocky25
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,521 ✭✭✭rocky25


    And a Merry Christmas to you too Galwayrush :D


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    #6
    Podge2k7
    Registered Users Posts: 3,963 ✭✭✭Podge2k7


    There was a woman who was pregnant with twins, and shortly before they were due, she had an accident and went into a coma. Her husband was away on business, and unable to be reached. While in the coma, she gave birth to her twins, and the only person around to name her children was her brother.

    When the mother came out of her coma to find she had given birth and that her brother had named the twins, she became very worried, because he wasn't a very bright guy. She was sure he had named them something absurd or stupid.

    When she saw her brother she asked him about the twins.

    He said, "The first one was a girl."

    The mother: "What did you name her?!?"

    Brother: "Denise!"

    The Mom: "Oh, wow, that's not bad! What about the second one?"

    Brother: "The second one was a boy."

    The Mom: "Oh, and what did you name him?"

    Brother: "Denephew."
    Little Tommy asks for a bike for christmas,
    His dad said, we would get you one but the morgage is £80.000 and your mum has lost her job,
    Next day tommy walked out with his suitcase packed, his dad asked where are you going?
    Tommy replied, i walked past your room last night and heard you tell mum you were pulling out,
    Then i heard her tell you to wait cause she was coming too, and im not staying here on my own with a £80.000 mortgage and no fcuking bike.

    Tampax have announced today that will be replacing the cord on their tampons with a piece of tinsel,
    This will be for the christmas period only


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