A Few Podge and Rodge!

dak

You’re as welcome as a f@rt in a spacesuit……..

He thinks manual labour is a Spanish musician……….

As funny as a burning orphanage………

He's so camp, he sh1tes tent pegs…………

I'm as sick as a plane to Lourdes……….

She had a face on her that would drive rats from a barn……..

Sweatin' like a pedophile in a Barney suit……….

I'd crawl a million miles across broken glass to kiss the exhaust of the van that took her dirty kn1ckers to the laundry. ?????

A m1ckey the size of a double-value can of Right Guard……….

Jaysus, she could breastfeed a crèche…………

Mother Teresa wouldn’t kiss her………..

A sniper wouldn't take her out………..

Jaysus, ya wouldn't ride her into battle……..

If I'd a bag of bruised willies I wouldn't give her one………

She has a face on her like a bulldog that's just licked p1ss off a nettle…….

She wouldn't get a kick in a stampede………

If I'd a garden full of Mickey’s I wouldn't let her look over the wall…….

She grabs that pole like Brian Kennedy in a m1ckey factory……
I'm as sick as a small hospital

I'm so hungry I'd eat a small child

She had a face on her like a well slapped a*se

My mouth's as dry as a nuns cr@ck

He has rubber-lined pockets so he can steal soup

I feel like a boiled sh1te (hungover)

(when leaving) I'm off like a debs dress

She had a face on her that would drive rats from a barn

As busy as the dalkey dole office

As tight as a nun's kn1ckers

I'm so h0rny I'd get up on the crack of dawn

Up and down like a hoor's kn1ckers

No show pony but would do for a ride around the house

What would ye expect from a pig but a grunt

I left her with a face like a painters radio

As fit as a butcher's dog

Not even the tide would take her out

Daz wouldn't shift her

Des Kelly wouldn't lay her

rferguson

brilliant!!! made rofl

lanternchikk

"If stupid was flammable, these people could end our dependency on middle eastern oil."