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  • 15-12-2008 8:53pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,521 ✭✭✭


    Two aliens landed in the Edinburgh area near a petrol station that was
    closed for the night.

    They approached one of the petrol pumps and the younger alien addressed it
    saying,

    'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader.'

    The pump, of course, didn't respond.

    The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.

    The older alien said, 'I'd calm down if I were you.'

    The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting.

    Again, there was no response.

    Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his
    ray gun and said impatiently,

    'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace.

    Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!'

    The older alien again warned his comrade saying,

    'You probably don't want to do that!

    I really don't think you should make him Mad.'

    'Rubbish,' replied the cocky, young alien.

    He aimed his weapon at the pump and opened fire.

    There was a huge explosion.

    A massive fireball roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him a
    burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a flower patch.

    Half an hour passed.

    When he finally regained consciousness, he refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna,

    looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his Big Giant Head.

    'What a ferocious creature!' exclaimed the young, cried alien.

    'He damn near killed me!

    How did you know he was so dangerous?'

    The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend
    and replied,

    'If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels,

    You don't want to mess with a guy who can wrap his penis around himself twice and then stick it in his ear.'


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