Old Lady

coldfire1x

A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two large

plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. Unfortunately, there's

a rip in one of the bags and every once in a while a $20 note falls out onto

the pavement.

Noticing this, a policeman stops her. ' Ma'am, there are $20 bills

falling out of your bag.

'Oh, really? Darn!' says the little old lady. ' I'd better go back and

see if I can collect them. Thanks for the warning!'

'Well, now, not so fast,' says the cop. ' How did you get all that

money? You didn't steal it, did you?'

'Oh, no,' says the little old lady. ' You see, my back yard is right

Next to the parking lot of the football stadium.

Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee through the bushes

right into my flower beds! So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a

big hedge clipper and each time someone sticks his little thingy

through the bushes, I say, ' $20 or off it comes.'

'Well that seems fair,' laughs the cop. ' Okay, good luck! '

'By the way, what's in the other bag?'

'Well, ' says the little old lady, ' not everybody pays.'

***********

Little Tony had been playing outside with the other kids for a while.

When he came into the house, he asked her, "Grandma, what's that thing called when two people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the other?"

She was a little taken aback, but she decided to just tell him the truth. "It's called sexual intercourse, darling."

Little Tony just said, 'Oh, OK,' and went back outside to play with the other kids.

A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, "Grandma, it isn't called sexual intercourse.

It's called Bunk Beds and Jimmy's Mom wants to talk to you!

Podge2k7

Great stuff!:D