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Before it starts..............

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  • 21-12-2008 11:57am
    #1
    coldfire1x
    Registered Users Posts: 3,354 ✭✭✭


    This guy comes home from an exhausting day at work and plops down

    on the couch in front of the television. "Quick, get me a beer

    before it starts," he says to his wife.

    His wife sighs and gets him a beer.

    "Quick," he says fifteen minutes later, "get me another beer

    before it starts."

    She looks angry, fetches another beer and slams it down next to

    him.

    He finishes that beer. "Hey, get me another beer. It's going to

    start any minute."

    She marches out, grabs a beer, and throws it at him.

    "Hey, hurry," he says five minutes later. "Get me another beer.

    It's gonna start now."

    His wife is furious. "Is that all you're going to do tonight?"

    she yells at him. "Drink beer and sit in front of that TV?

    You're nothing but a lazy, drunken, as*hole . . ."

    The man sighs. "It's started . . . "

    Only three doors

    An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.

    The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"

    The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"


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