Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest
The Fathers Thread
Comments
-
-
-
-
-
-
Advertisement
-
-
-
-
Forget everything that you've learned from the TV about labour and childbirth. Aside from pain and a baby at the end, every portrayal of the process on film is wrong and misleadingI have to admit though I am absolutly terrified about the birth itself. I know I have to stay calm for her but my mind will be a wash of worry and anxiety for everything to be ok I get nervous even thinking about it. Any words of wisdom from the wise?
Get your hands on a good baby book that's aimed only at fathers, so you can understand how the process will work from your end and how it will appear to you.
I've the same, first child due at the end of October and had our first prenatal class last night. The physio had a great way of describing labour and contractions as a bit like a wave pool. At first you have some random ripples, then some small waves, and it progressively builds up to bigger and bigger waves.
The key things I took away from last night were:
- the average time from the onset of labour to birth is about 12 hours, 90% of which is spent doing nothing except coping with contractions - so no pushing or anything, just learning to manage the discomfort (a mild word for it) of contracting.
- Once dilation is complete (after about 11 hours on average), you're 45 minutes to an hour away from a baby appearing.
To me this basically said, "Don't panic". From the onset of labour, you have lots of time. If you get a phone call in work, you don't have to break every traffic light on the way home and barge in a sweaty mess. The process is quite slow and if you can be aware of it and the various signs, then you can be in control of it and your emotions.
No doubt your wife and yourself have heard stories from other people of their horrendous birth, from parents of 36 hours of labour and from random stories on the internet of women who went into labour and gave birth 13 minutes later on the kitchen floor.
These are the statistical outsiders. And the reason you hear about them and and not all of the "everything went as expected" stories is precisely because they're the statistical outsiders.
Don't worry too much about this, you're still only 30/31 weeks? I remember at a small scan (28 weeks I think), the doctor said that the baby was breech which might be something to be concerned about, and we almost laughed at him. There's plenty of time yet for the baby to turn. Breech at 34 weeks is the time to start considering alternatives, and still breech at 36 weeks is generally the time when you decide for definite if you want to turn the baby or go for a c-section. Babies can still turn later than this, but since 38 weeks is considered "term", the doctor may want to avoid a breech birth and schedule a C-section for the first day of the 38th week.We had a check up last week and the doctors told us that the baby is in a breach position at the moment, if he doesn't move around in the next few weeks they are going to try and move him manually , herself really doesn't want to have this done as it's meant to be pretty painfull so were hopefull he turns himself otherwise we may be looking at a section.
The baby turns quite quickly, so she could wake up practically any morning to find it's in the correct position.0 -
Did our last parenting class last night. Overall it was 2 with the physio for birthing positions and stuff, and 3 with a midwife, discussing labour, feeding and looking after a newborn. Totally worth it, especially for someone like me who's never had to spend more than five minutes alone with a baby. Lots of info I knew already, but then lots of "on the ground" stuff to fill the gaps in what I knew.
Last night at one point she was discussing "resuming sexual relations" (if you have the energy) and recommended that you wait until you've had the six-week post natal checkup to make sure everything's OK. "But you don't have to. We've had women come in for their six-week checkup and discover that they're pregnant again" :eek:
I think that, more than anything, is the scariest thing I heard in any of the classes 0 -
Advertisement
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Have enjoyed reading through most of this thread, some great info here, so thanks to everyone for contributing.
We found out a few days ago that we're expecting our first. It's already been a long road, with a couple of years of fertility treatment, so it's just great to finally reach this stage. We're both very worried about everything that could go wrong (especially as it's still very early days) but also both excited and scared and in shock!
Fingers crossed everything goes well between now and June...
J.0 -
-
Six whole days for me. Still hasn't really sunk in tbh, I'm not feeling the "imminence" of it yet. In my head it's still "miles away" like it was 6 months ago. Maybe when I have trouble sleeping next Tuesday, it'll have sunk in.
I'm very excited though.
My wife is equally glad and pissed off she's still working. Pissed off because she's sore and uncomfortable and tired and just wants the baby here now. Glad because she would be climbing the walls if she didn't have something to do. She only gets four real days maternity leave before the birth and she has already filled them up with going for dinners and coffees and such 0 -
Advertisement
-
-
-
-
-
Congrats to you and your girlfriend Capri86! Has it sunk in yet? We're slowly getting used to my wife actually being pregnant, but I don't think we're used to that meaning we'll have a baby in June yet!
J.
I know the feeling. It has sunk in a bit alright but it's a great feeling. I forget about it in work sometimes and then when I remember I can't believe it. It's all good. I'm hoping the next few months fly in!0 -
-
-
-
-
Advertisement
-
My beautiful baby girl born via csection on Wednesday. Totally scheduled and still scary as hell.
Funny how quickly you get into the swing of it. Hopefully bringing her home today, I'm utterly shattered but totally besotted
Her Mum got her first sleep last night after 72 hours awake, she's a trooper, I'm in awe.0 -
-
Funny how quickly you get into the swing of it. Hopefully bringing her home today, I'm utterly shattered but totally besotted
Her Mum got her first sleep last night after 72 hours awake, she's a trooper, I'm in awe.
So true....I feel exactly the same way.
Had never really been near a baby before tbh so was a bit apprehensive but not doing too bad so far on 'Dad' duties - human nature I guess.
Mom & baby got some badly needed rest last night (and managed to get a couple of hours myself too) so can't wait to head back in now in a bit.
Congrats again cm0 -
-
-
I'm right at the other end of the journey, my wife is only 7 weeks pregnant. But the early cravings have already started, and we found ourselves getting out of bed at 11:50 last night and driving to the all night McDonalds in Tallaght for a Big Mac! She wolfed it down and was so content afterwards, I was only too glad to be able to help!
J.0 -
Advertisement
-
I'm right at the other end of the journey, my wife is only 7 weeks pregnant. But the early cravings have already started, and we found ourselves getting out of bed at 11:50 last night and driving to the all night McDonalds in Tallaght for a Big Mac! She wolfed it down and was so content afterwards, I was only too glad to be able to help!
J.
That's the nicest thing ever! I'm 21 weeks and can't say we've had such a pleasure yet- my fella has had to do a LOT of hair-holding though so he's earning his crust! The hair-holding/back rubbing is not to be under-estimated!0 -
I'm right at the other end of the journey, my wife is only 7 weeks pregnant. But the early cravings have already started, and we found ourselves getting out of bed at 11:50 last night and driving to the all night McDonalds in Tallaght for a Big Mac! She wolfed it down and was so content afterwards, I was only too glad to be able to help!
J.
Ohhhhh I'd love a big mac now
Major brownie points for you, will be showing my husband this thread
0 -
-
We are 7 weeks along and no such cravings yet. She is eating a lot of fruit though. It's amazing how your instincts crave what is good for the baby. The morning sickness started last week. She hasn't been feeling great but is happy as she and I know it means everything is happening as it should. Going for our first scan on December 3rd. Very exciting
My instincts at 16 weeks must be very off if I'm craving McDonald's:D
Enjoy the scan, first one is so exciting!0 -
-
Advertisement
-
yellow hen wrote: »
I've had no cravings at all. If anything it's been more about food aversions. Couldn't look rice or Asian food in the eye for a long time!
In fairness I am easily led. Someone can just mention something and it sounds amazing.... Same I suppose for aversions, one wrong suggestion and I'm gagging 0 -
Getting very close for me now , baby is due on Sunday. My other half is still full of energy , I don't know how she is keeping up she's been travelling into town , constantly cleaning , shopping and despite me trying everything to just get her to relax...it's not working
, Time seems to be moving very slowly now just waiting for something to happen but I'd imagine we will go a little over the due date. Baby's head in engaged and everything seems fine.
It's a funny aul time in life right before the birth , in work I'm acting as if nothing huge is happening just planning for everything as if I'll be around even though at any minute I could be off for two weeks. Decided to take as much holidays as I could to help around the house and get the baby settled in as well as give herself a much needed and deserved rest...although I can't imagine she'll bet at that too long , it's amazing how much some women change when having a baby I couldn't have imagined herself being like this a year ago!0 -
Interesting you should mention the change in yur OH, how have your women changed throufh the pregnancy (apartfrom physically!) I sometimes feelsorry for my partner, he lost that fun outgoing girl he loved and woke up with a couch potato constantly demandinf foot rubs!Getting very close for me now , baby is due on Sunday. My other half is still full of energy , I don't know how she is keeping up she's been travelling into town , constantly cleaning , shopping and despite me trying everything to just get her to relax...it's not working , Time seems to be moving very slowly now just waiting for something to happen but I'd imagine we will go a little over the due date. Baby's head in engaged and everything seems fine.
It's a funny aul time in life right before the birth , in work I'm acting as if nothing huge is happening just planning for everything as if I'll be around even though at any minute I could be off for two weeks. Decided to take as much holidays as I could to help around the house and get the baby settled in as well as give herself a much needed and deserved rest...although I can't imagine she'll bet at that too long , it's amazing how much some women change when having a baby I couldn't have imagined herself being like this a year ago!0 -
Just back from our first scan. It was an early one (8 weeks and 3 days) 'cos we did IVF and the clinic brings you in early.
Thankfully, everything is fine, good size, good heartbeat. Or should I say good heartbeats, as we're having twins! Always knew it was a possibility with the IVF and I had my suspicions from the hormones levels they'd seen. We're both thrilled, so good to find out everything's going ok. Slightly in awe too of how much more mad it is that there's two of them.
J.0 -
-
Just back from our first scan. It was an early one (8 weeks and 3 days) 'cos we did IVF and the clinic brings you in early.
Thankfully, everything is fine, good size, good heartbeat. Or should I say good heartbeats, as we're having twins! Always knew it was a possibility with the IVF and I had my suspicions from the hormones levels they'd seen. We're both thrilled, so good to find out everything's going ok. Slightly in awe too of how much more mad it is that there's two of them.
J.
Congratulations. That's great news. Would love twins myself as I am one. Haha. Must be a great feeling knowing there is 2 !0 -
Thanks!
It is a great feeling, but also it's more scary as well. Twice the fun, twice the worry! And it's still early days, will feel so much better when we hit 12 weeks and things are still hopefully going well. Anything I'd thought about in the last few weeks (Moses Baskets, Buggies, Car Seats, etc. as well as lack of sleep, feeds, everything really) has now doubled!
J.0 -
-
-
-
Advertisement
Advertisement