Donating your eggs

Alice1

Lightning, you make a good point. I accept that the probability of a child to whom I gave birth meeting with a child of my egg is low - specially in a huge country like the US. Ireland, though, is tiny and I'd be afraid that the probability would be too high.

Regarding accepting money for donating something else; if it was part of my body (blood/plasma/platelets or an organ) no, I just couldn't accept money. I just regard it as wrong....or something. I couldn't do it.

Xiney

Alice1 wrote: »

My concern about egg donation / sale is that if donated / sold eggs result in a successful pregnancy and the resultant child were to meet one of my children in later life it is possible that they would fall in love and have children of their own.

Have to say - the possibility of this happening is scary.

However, it's not much different than someone growing up and meeting an illegitamate child of his/her father and falling in love with them, or someone who was adopted falling in love with a biological full sibling even. Basically, this risk of inadvertent inbreeding wouldn't be something this new technology would suddenly bring about.

Alice1 wrote: »

I find something distasteful about selling what has been given freely to me.

And what of intelligence? Is that not freely given? Sure, knowledge is worked at but intelligence is pretty much determined genetically. Should people in careers requiring high intelligence be doing it for free?


Personally, I wouldn't donate eggs or a kidney to a stranger for free. (Actually I wouldn't even really donate a kidney to a stranger for money either, but that's not the point - I need both my kidneys)

Ginger kid battalion here I don't come!

To me dna donation has sweet feck all to do with parenthood.
I really couldn't understand any resulting children considering me as such in that case.
Which is probably why my masterplan is better off unimplemented.
I could never inject myself repeated anyways, I'm squeamish.


It is all well and good stringently screening the egg donor, but I would worry over the quality of sperm. What control have you as an egg donor goit over that?

embee

Moonbaby wrote: »

It is all well and good stringently screening the egg donor, but I would worry over the quality of sperm. What control have you as an egg donor goit over that?

As an egg donor you have no say in what sperm is or isn't used. You're a donor, not the prespective parent. Why on earth would a donor get a say in any part of the process after they've donated?!

embee

embee wrote: »

Why on earth would a donor get a say in any part of the process after they've donated?!

Because if I was going to be responsible for making a person I would like to do my best to give them good health.
Most genetic illnesses are passed down through the male, and I think the process of ivf overides natural selection safeguards. IVF Children are much more likely to be ill.
I don't think it is good enough to ignore that half of the equation, just because someone is paying for the pleasure.

Nevyn

Moonbaby wrote: »

Most genetic illnesses are passed down through the male,

Can you back this up with citations please.

Moonbaby wrote: »

IVF Children are much more likely to be ill.

Can you also back this up with citations please.

Moonbaby wrote: »

I don't think it is good enough to ignore that half of the equation, just because someone is paying for the pleasure.

You don't get a say, thats the whole point.
And really are you going to make any bloke who stats an intrest intrest in settling down with you for dna discovery and a full medical family history and reject him on those grounds ?

LolaLuv

Thaedydal wrote: »

And really are you going to make any bloke who stats an intrest intrest in settling down with you for dna discovery and a full medical family history and reject him on those grounds ?

I see what you're saying here, and I think you have a valid point. I wouldn't subject a guy to a DNA charting or anything, but there could be certain diseases that would make me think twice, especially those diseases my family already has a predisposition for. I think by the time I were settling down with a guy I'd be too in love to break things off, probably, but I can't see how it wouldn't concern me at all. It seems pretty natural to want your kids to have the best shot at health, even before they're born.

I'm just trying to say that I understand both viewpoints.:)

Nevyn

PillyPen wrote: »

It seems pretty natural to want your kids to have the best shot at health, even before they're born.

Ah but that is just it, it won't be her kid it will be the kid of the couple who paid for the egg.

LolaLuv

Thaedydal wrote: »

Ah but that is just it, it won't be her kid it will be the kid of the couple who paid for the egg.

Very true. But I'd still feel a responsibility to the donated egg since the resulting child wouldn't have come into being without my involvement. But that's why I wouldn't be any good as an egg donor.

GirlInterrupted

I couldn't live knowing that my biological baby was being loved and cared for by someone else. It would hurt if I donated for a friend and watched the baby love his 'other' mother, and it would hurt if I did it for an anonomyous recipient, not knowing if they were getting the life I would want for them.

Not knowing if indeed any of my donated eggs resulted in a baby or not, which, as has been pointed out, happens, would simply add to the torment.

Not for me.

stovelid

I've done lots of things in my past that I now regret.

But something that could result in my child walking around out there would be something I'd hate to be regretting in years to come. Especially as circumstances (medical/social) may easily conspire to leave me without children in the future.

IMO purely, of course.

iguana

I'm another one who would think of a child resulting from my egg as being my baby. It's not something I'd be able to do. I would however consider being a host womb for somebody I loved who couldn't carry a baby but who had viable eggs. But it would have to be a close friend, cousin or sister-in-law, so I could have a special "aunt" relationship with the child. But biologically it would be the child of the mother who raises it. Although that also depends on how I feel about giving birth to my own child first.

LightningBolt

iguana wrote: »

I'm another one who would think of a child resulting from my egg as being my baby. It's not something I'd be able to do. I would however consider being a host womb for somebody I loved who couldn't carry a baby but who had viable eggs. But it would have to be a close friend, cousin or sister-in-law, so I could have a special "aunt" relationship with the child. But biologically it would be the child of the mother who raises it. Although that also depends on how I feel about giving birth to my own child first.

How would it be your baby? Forgive me for my next sentence or two because I don't fully understand how donating eggs works. If someone donates eggs, does the couple who wish to have a child have the eggs placed inside the woman along with her partners sperm? If so, although the baby has your DNA it also has the male partners DNA along with being placed in the female partners womb. All you've done is contribute to allow a couple have a child.

iguana

LightningBolt wrote: »

How would it be your baby? Forgive me for my next sentence or two because I don't fully understand how donating eggs works. If someone donates eggs, does the couple who wish to have a child have the eggs placed inside the woman along with her partners sperm? If so, although the baby has your DNA it also has the male partners DNA along with being placed in the female partners womb. All you've done is contribute to allow a couple have a child.

If a couple have a one nightstand which leaves the woman pregnant, but they don't meet again for 20 years is it the child biologically his baby? If a woman places a baby up for adoption and never sees it again is it still biologically her baby. If a man donates sperm which 2 women use to impregnate themselves are the babies biologically half-siblings? Yes, yes and yes.

If a baby is made using my egg, it would biologically be my baby regardless of who's womb it implants in, or whoever raises it. Just like my children will be it's half siblings. The womb the embryo implants in, in know way contributes to the genetic make up of a donor egg baby. The biological parents are the providers of the egg and sperm. Which is why I would consider carrying an embryo for a loved one, but I would never, ever give away my eggs.

Wurly

I previously worked for a well known fertility clinic.

Egg donors do not receive payment but are compensated for inconvenience and for expenses incurred. The clinic pay these expenses on your behalf.

The tests include STD screening, physical and gynecological exam, a medical and family history, blood and urine tests, and a psychological evaluation.

rainbowtrout

I looked into this a year ago, and at the end of the day, I like a couple of the other posters here couldn't go through with it knowing that it could/would result in a child that is biologically mine.

I'd always wonder how the child was being raised and if I would do things differently. And there is the chance of running into that child given how small Ireland is.

When i looked into it here, there were no payments, the donor only gets their expenses covered unlike in the USA and they had to be under 35 with a proven fertility record, so I assumed that meant they only wanted women who already had children, ideally having completed their families. Maybe they would be less likely to have an attachment to the egg when they had children of their own. I'd love to want to donate but it's not for me. I'll stick to blood donation.

useful_contacts

metaoblivia wrote: »

You also have to have a university degree

because the child will be stupid if you dont???:rolleyes: What a supid rule

Wibbs

useful_contacts wrote: »

because the child will be stupid if you dont???:rolleyes: What a supid rule

Oh the ironing . I suppose if they have some sort of cut off that would be a good one especially in the US.

metrovelvet

There's no need to be racist Wibbs. If want to do that you can start your own genius egg clinic.

Wibbs

Nope. For a start Americans aren't a "race" and secondly I have noted with Americans, that having attended college in America holds more kudos than say in Ireland as a judgement on the intelligence status of a person. Plus as college, while simpler to get into at state college level(depending on course) than ireland for an equivalent course(again in general) it can be very expensive, so would tend to suggest more middle class background, better diet etc growing up, or somebody with "natural" get up and go. Plus with SAT scores being involved, where the equivalent does not happen here, that would add to it. So as a cut off point to establish intelligence(though it's hardly definitive) and background in general it seems an understandable one in that culture. Simple as that. As we know it has differences culturally. The payment is a big one for a start. Compensation I would wholeheartedly agree with, ten grand on top feels somehow to monetary to me somehow. Less purely altruistic anyway.

LadyE

I'd donate eggs, I also think Id be willing to be a surrogate mother for someone. I know that isnt for anyone, but I findthat personally motherhood is one of the most brillaint, exciting and wonderful things ever, and if someone I knew (or didnt) needed my help in carrying their child I probably would.

Ebay?

Zaph

Deleted User wrote: »

Ebay?

Huh?

metrovelvet

Deleted User wrote: »

Ebay?

Lol.

You could hire a broker or an agent too.

Talk about not buying the cow....

Thaedydal

Thaedydal wrote: »

Can you back this up with citations please.




Can you also back this up with citations please.



You don't get a say, thats the whole point.
And really are you going to make any bloke who stats an intrest intrest in settling down with you for dna discovery and a full medical family history and reject him on those grounds ?

Ok so the first I probably gleaned from some Amazonian sci-fi propaganda. Perhaps it is not a good idea to herd the other sex into gimp zoo's afterall.

And the second http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-469864/IVF-children-twice-likely-suffer-poor-health.html


I wouldn't reject a life partner because of skeletons in his genetic closet. There are things that I don't think are worth suffering through. And if they were a possibilty I would chose to remain childless.

Is it that mad to discuss these things before you ttc, if you get the chance?
Genetic screening might be the norm in the distance future when my clock starts to tick.

Likewise age would an important thing for me. I just don't think it is fair for the 50 pluses to chose to have babies.

littlebug

Moonbaby wrote: »

And the second http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-469864/IVF-children-twice-likely-suffer-poor-health.html
.

just wanted to note that the article also says

The researchers said that some of the findings could be explained by the high number of twins born through IVF.
As they are more likely to be lighter than other babies and be born prematurely, twins tend to be more illness-prone than other children. However IVF children who weren't twins were also sicker than their naturallyconceived counterparts. It is possible the health problems were somehow caused by the IVF process itself.
It is also possible that chlamydia infection, stress and other factors which may have affected the mother's fertility went on to impact on the baby's development in the womb.
It may however be that parents who have undergone fertility treatment are simply more inclined to seek medical help

So whilst they found that ivf babies do tend to be hospitalised more they can't say categorically that it is from the ivf alone.

LolaLuv

Wibbs wrote: »

Oh the ironing . I suppose if they have some sort of cut off that would be a good one especially in the US.

I'd like to state for the record that I think you were definitely being racist. :pac:

Monkey61

I would happily sell my eggs for money were it not such an invasive and possibly dangerous procedure. The fear of Ovarian Hyperstimualtion is the only thing that would stop me!

Personally i wouldn't see donating an egg as any different to donating blood. The future child would share some DNA with me, but that would be it. It would on no level be mine. I'm quite surprised people equating it with giving away a baby. I could happily do it without a second thought were it not for concerns of my health. Plus the pleasing buzz of having, hopefully, helped a childless couple would also be nice.

In response to those of the opinion that adoptions should be prioritised over this, I can understand your point of view, but I think that's a bit like deciding to forbid all couples from making babies as long as there are children in need of adoption.

metrovelvet

I know those who would donate eggs with all the good intentions of helping a lovely couple concive a child think they are doing something benevolent, but in the end you dont get to choose who will be a mother to your egg. A true story for you:

I know a 56 year old woman, who having had two abortions because her boyfriend didnt want to have Jewish kids [she was jewish obviously] decided to have a baby. She wanted the baby to be a boy and to be musical like this boyfriend of hers [who after having been murdered in his apartment in Brooklyn she decided was the love of her life] so she set out for an egg which came from a musical mother and a sperm which came from a musical father. Well she couldnt get all she wanted, so she got the egg from a classical pianist and settled [her word] on the sperm from a Russian truck driver, and 45 thousand dollars later regrets it because she wishes she hadnt settled for a Russain druck driver and also because the baby was a girl.