Wrong Approach

cozmik

Two married friends are out drinking one night, when one turns to the other and says, "You know I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage.

Take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, get undressed in the bathroom, stick my foot in the toilet and pee down my leg to prevent splashing sounds.

I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out so late."

His friend looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach.

I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, pee hard into the toilet water, then use the full flush, throw my shoes in the closet, undress in the bedroom, then jump into bed, slap her on the butt and say 'WHO'S HORNY????!!!' and she acts like she's sound asleep! Works every time!"

Podge2k7

LOL nice one!!:D

Soodlebum

A very very sheepish, hungover man walks into the kitchen, the morning after the night before. He is dreading what Wifey is going to say. She is standing at the cooker, smiling, and twiddling something on the frying pan. Gingerly, he asks what she is doing - as he knows from past experience that cooking breakfast for him is not the norm.
She turns and smiles sweetly at him.
"Why, dear, I'm just doing what you asked me to do last night" Puzzled, he says What?

"Look Dear" she says showing him a motheaten sock on the frying pan - "I'm doing just as you asked - when you asked me to cook your sock".
(Try saying it out loud...LOL LOL)