D!ckheads in the cinema

Acacia

Tyler MacDurden wrote: »

I find a little butter helps, easy on the salt though.

LOL, and would it be a whole bag of popcorn or just one lucky piece? :pac:

*Sorry, I'm very inquisitive today!

Tyler MacDurden

Acacia wrote: »

LOL, and would it be a whole bag of popcorn or just one lucky piece? :pac:

*Sorry, I'm very inquisitive today!

Oh no, it's gotta be a tub. Wouldn't want the rustling of a bag in the throes of passion to disturb my fellow movie-goers.

Galvasean

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XACDNcj50Zk

Acacia

Galvasean wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XACDNcj50Zk

They should hire Hulk Hogan over in Liffey valley cinema to sort out the noisy little scobies that come in.

Tyler MacDurden

Acacia wrote: »

They should hire Hulk Hogan over in Liffey valley cinema to sort out the noisy little scobies that come in.

Indeed. Imagine a gremlin with a shoiney tracksooit* tucked into his white towelly socks, a burberry cap at a jaunty angle on his scaly little cranium. Multiply by six. That's the crew that wrecked my meagre enjoyment of a second rate Russell Crowe movie.

*Attempted phonetic rendering of skobe dialect.

Acacia

Tyler MacDurden wrote: »

Indeed. Imagine a gremlin with a shoiney tracksooit* tucked into his white towelly socks, a burberry cap at a jaunty angle on his scaly little cranium. Multiply by six. That's the crew that wrecked my meagre enjoyment of a second rate Russell Crowe movie.

*Attempted phonetic rendering of skobe dialect.

Funny, sounds like the same ones that ruined Spiderman for me. Me thinks they're on a mission to ruin films for everyone.

Tyler MacDurden

Acacia wrote: »

Funny, sounds like the same ones that ruined Spiderman for me. Me thinks they're on a mission to ruin films for everyone.

Sounds like an outbreak. Right, who's been feeding the skangers after midnight? :mad:

Galvasean

Are these the same ones that yelled on a mobile, "Oim in da pictchars!!!" during Passion of the christ?

mikemac

What's a cinema ticket cost?
I dunno as I pay by direct debit monthly for a unlimited card
But I would gladly pay 2 euro and hope most everyone in the cinema with me would do the same to get a bouncer or two in and instruct a zero tolerence policy.
Money well spent imo seeing as cinema management don't seem to care

I don't have too many issues with noise or with people jabbing on their mobiles.

I have issues with:

1. People in the row behind tapping and kicking my row of seats. This goes for putting feet on seats in my row too within a few places, I can see you from the corner of my eye, it's distracting
2. People texting! Why the fook did you pay into a film to text your mates? ok, no noise but the light from a mobile in a dark cinema is very distracting

Acacia

Galvasean wrote: »

Are these the same ones that yelled on a mobile, "Oim in da pictchars!!!" during Passion of the christ?

No, they yelled ' ****in' shoite, I want me money back from Mel Gibson'. Then tracked down Mel Gibson but he wouldn't give them back the money...

...wait. No. That was somebody else.

Tyler MacDurden

Galvasean wrote: »

Are these the same ones that yelled on a mobile, "Oim in da pictchars!!!" during Passion of the christ?

Ha. Jaysus. The memories.

Personally, i felt like yelling "Why the **** am I sitting in a darkened room in the middle of the afternoon surrounded by weeping, rosary-wielding OAPs, watching a midget fanatic's pet snuff-movie?"

Galvasean

Acacia wrote: »

No, they yelled ' ****in' shoite, I want me money back from Mel Gibson'. Then tracked down Mel Gibson but he wouldn't give them back the money...

...wait. No. That was somebody else.

Apparently if you confront George Clooney in person and ask for your money back for Batman and Robin he WILL give it to you.

Acacia

Galvasean wrote: »

Apparently if you confront George Clooney in person and ask for your money back for Batman and Robin he WILL give it to you.

He should do, I still have nightmares about that nipple suit, the bastid!

congo_90

Boston wrote: »

It has nothing to do with emergency numbers. Jammers broadcast a powerful signal on the frequencies used by your mobile phone. These frequencies are owned by mobile phone operators and as such you do not have the legal right to interfere with them. There are substantial fines for doing so.

There is a fine wire mesh that can be purchased that blocks all radio signals not just mobile phones. I've seen it before being used but not for cinemas. Can't think of the name of it now.

Boston

congo_90 wrote: »

There is a fine wire mesh that can be purchased that blocks all radio signals not just mobile phones. I've seen it before being used but not for cinemas. Can't think of the name of it now.

Putting aside the fact that you are incorrect in your assertion that it can be used to block all radio signals that is not a jamming device. Jamming is a specific term relating to flooding a frequency band with noise. The previous suggestion was signal interception and your suggestion relates to signal blocking. The use of materials such as wire mesh to attenuate a radio signal is a common practice. In fact my one of my lecture halls in college (where I studied telecommunications engineering) was build of materials which highly attenuated signals in the 900Mhz - 2.5Ghz range.

AnonoBoy

Galvasean wrote: »

Apparently if you confront George Clooney in person and ask for your money back for Batman and Robin he WILL give it to you.

Just booked my flight to LA. You don't happen to know his address do you?

joeybarton=hero

Went to see Che last night in the cinema


Firstly, is it any use?

i agree i hate "muppets" that constantly cause annoyance throughout a film! honestly staff should be employed to ensure this does not happen after all you have payed good money to watch and enjoy the film. most other reccreational/ social public places have security etc so why not in the cinema also. it would cut out the problem. i realise its impractical for a security guard to be in every screen. but its the only solution i can offer!

SV

If the mobile phones get to you that much..

Lord Nikon

javaboy wrote: »

Ooh. Maybe I should get a gimmick too.
I need something annoying and pointless that makes my posts more difficult to read.
Now which one of these pretty buttons will I abuse to make my posts stand out more? Hmmm.

Post reported for spam and trolling, cause I'm bored.

I don't go to the cinema anymore, too expensive, and full of ignorance.

Lord Nikon

AnonoBoy wrote: »

*hangs head* I got a blowjob in a cinema once.

In my defence - it was very empty and we were at the back away from everyone. And the film was really boring.

Was it a porno movie?

Lord Nikon

Acacia wrote: »

how the fudge do you rape popcorn?

Very carefully.

mathie

I was in the cinema the other night and had quite the bizarre experience.

Settled down to match a very, masculine film that in no way resembled The Proposal. There was a bunch of about 12 pre-teen skang-bangers who proceeded to chat as loudly as possible and pass comment at every turn. It was annoying in the 'quiet' moments of the film but not so bad in the 'louder' parts.

Anyway a few of us went out to find a manager at random points of the film and they sent one or two people in to 'observe' yet they did nothing.

Anyway with about 5 minutes left in the film one of the scum goes 'Ya betta kiss 'im ya ho-bag!' during a scene and a woman in front of us stood up and launched into a monologue which included ...

My father just died and I'm back for the funeral. This is exactly why I left this country. When I was young kids didn't use words like that. etc etc...

Very bizarre.

Porkpie

I watch a dvd at home on my 32 inch LCD tv with surround sound. Can of coke, home made popcorn. Lights off. Much better. Cinema sucks, too much chance of arseholes ruining the film. Unless you go to the IFI, or some equivalent.

starflake

Went to see the new Tarantino movie at the weekend and some BITCH kept kicking the back of my chair the whole way through it! I'm pretty shy when it comes to confronting people I just threw her an evil look right in the middle of a particularly bad kicking session! For me it took a lot of guts to do that!After I threw her a look it got much worse. As a result I really couldn't concentrate on the movie! This woman was at least 26/27.. How childish!! I would never even dream of kicking the seat in front of me! People are so selfish! It's like no'one is entitled to any peace! People really only look out for no.1 Don't they?!

prinz

Had a bad experience with a gang of scumbags in the Savoy on O'Connell Street ruining a movie a good while ago. Seems to be a bigger problem where people can go from screen to screen without having their ticket rechecked. People left the cinema, people got the ushers to come in, they'd stand in front for 5 minutes and leave and all the racket would start up again. One woman would stood up and told a pair behind her to shut up and she was told to 'sit the f*ck down or you'll get a smack' and these were lads and girls about 10 or 11 ffs.

Anyway got on to the manager after the film with a few other people and he offered a refund. Couldn't believe it but most of the people who complained actually turned down the refund, with an Irish 'ah sure its not your fault' etc... I took it no bother. If people made a bigger issue out of it they would do something to stop it.

Mossy Monk

starflake wrote: »

After I threw her a look it got much worse

Dark room. Should have kicked ten shades of ****e out of her. Seeing as she likes kicking and all.

cliojamie

In cineworld, on parnell st. some skank speant the entire film on his phone beside me! he ruined Batman for me:(

GalwayKiefer

It never ceases to amaze me the ignorance of some people. Worst experience I've had though was in a cinema in Boston with my American cousin. He wanted to see The Incredible Hulk so off we went. A few mins into it 6 lads came in and sat behind us and started acting the b****x eventually progressing to kicking our seats on a regular basis. We let it go for a while but in the end decided to leave because we couldn't enjoy the film and didn't fancy getting into a fight with 6 big lads (sterotypical American "jocks"). Went out looking for the manager and instead of having a security guard on duty like you'd get here they had a cop assigned to the cinema. Turns out some rows between young gangs (in the group sense not blood/crypt etc) in the cinema had gotten very out of hand recently. Am glad things haven't gotten that bad here. Film was rubbish too, got it on dvd and turned it off.

Gryzor

just be careful who u tell to stfu though :eek:

The_Kew_Tour

Gryzor wrote: »

just be careful who u tell to stfu though :eek:

keys should be thrown away on that coward

boogle

Me, OH and OH's brother were in cineman in Dundalk (notorious scumhole cinema) watching Return of the King a few years ago. So the cinema was packed and about half an hour into the film we get this really bloody awful smell. The guy sitting next to my OH is a tracksuit-wearing scanger who, on closer inspection, has taken his manky runners off. Now I cannot express in words how bad the smell of his feet was. I mean, it made our stomachs queasy and I couldn't even concentrate on the film. I can honestly say I've never smelled feet as bad as that, ever. So after about another 20 mins my OH (who's really non-confrontational and easy-going) leans over to yer man and whispers innocently "Has someone taken their shoes off down the row or something?" Hoping the guy would be embarassed and put his fooking runners back on. Oh no.

He screams "Wha de fook are yew sayin' bout my feet?! Ye fooking baxtard!" Then, he jumps up and starts beating up my OH in the middle of the packed f*cking cinema! He's punching the face off him and kicking him. Then his friend who was sitting directly in front of us jumps across the seat and holds my OH so the other guy can punch him. My OH's brother comes flying into the fray and drags the guy off him. By this stage other cinema-goers, their film enjoyment ruined, jumped in and pulled the lads off us. The smelly scanger then turned to me, hocked one up and spat on me. The cinema staff came in and dragged the guys outside and we followed. Turns out those two guys were barred from the cinema already. Husband got a bloody nose and we got NOTHING. No free tickets, nothing.

Elessar

I haven't had too many bad experiences in all my years going to the cinema here thankfully. I know to keep my mouth shut to avoid trouble aswell.

I remember a while back though these pikey children came in and proceeded to shout and roar nonstop. Someone left and told the manager. The pikeys, with obvious experience of this situation, all got up and sat in different seats around the room. The film stopped, and the lights went on. The manager, fair play to him, came in himself and evicted some of the offending patrons, through cries of "I DINN DO NAATHIN!". Two guards showed up a few mins later and evicted more of them.

The film eventually restarted and continued on. The rest of the hiding pikeys left 10 mins later and I, along with everyone in the cinema peacefully enjoyed the rest of the picture.

AnonoBoy

Biggest dickhead in cinema these days?

Damien Dante Wayans.

What an asshole.

Overheal

homerun_homer wrote: »

Went to see Che last night in the cinema and a bunch of pikeys walked in half an hour into it, dressed like they were going out to a club, phones ringing, constantly talking ("I can't read subtitles") and being a general annoyance. The screen was small and they were scattered everywhere so there was no avoiding them. I wanted to walk out when they came in but I was on a date and it was a bit of a catch 22 as to what would ruin it more. Eventually the subtitles got the best of them and they left. Shouting "Adios Amigos" to the whole cinema as they went.


Of course staff didn't check in until after they left, only then did they frequently pop in to make sure there was no disturbances.

I'm sick of this Sh!t always happening.

Anyone else got annoying cinema stories?

...District 9?

larchielads

was in the cinema recently.went to see pelham 123. thought it was ok. anywho, there's a few lines in the film that are funny so me and my mates were laughin at it.so too other other people layghed. but this one guy turned to us and told us to be quiet but we said we weren't the only ones laughing and told him to give out to everyone else he duly realised he was wrong. loked pretty stupid infront of his lady friend and the best thing happened after that. he went to pick up his large coke and spilled it all over himself and his lovely lady friend!!!! ha ha *&^$ing ha:D:D:D:D:D

Fionne

larchielads wrote: »

was in the cinema recently.went to see pelham 123. thought it was ok. anywho, there's a few lines in the film that are funny so me and my mates were laughin at it.so too other other people layghed. but this one guy turned to us and told us to be quiet but we said we weren't the only ones laughing and told him to give out to everyone else he duly realised he was wrong. loked pretty stupid infront of his lady friend and the best thing happened after that. he went to pick up his large coke and spilled it all over himself and his lovely lady friend!!!! ha ha *&^$ing ha:D:D:D:D:D

Oh, I'd have loved to have seen that!

I go to the cinema alot and have experienced the noisy teenagers, the practically-having-sex teenagers, the ankle-biters (and usually WAY too young for the film age rating) screeching around the place, the chair kicking. But the most annoying was an older couple (late 40's early 50's age) who ALWAYS seemed to end up sitting in front of me & my other half and would talk throughout the whole film, in a normal (non-hushed) voice. Took my mother to the cinema a couple of times and she thought it was perfectly ok to talk too, maybe that was alright back in her youth when smoking was also allowed in the cinema. Or she just thought she was at home watching a big telly....

mathie

Overheal wrote: »

...District 9?

No it was Che.

Hinted at via the cryptic opener "Went to see Che last night in the cinema ... "

the_syco

I find the "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" usually does the trick

Sean Quagmire

There should be a serious crack down on this sort of thing. I could tell, as most normal people could, what little scrotes are going to be acting up in the cinema by looking at them. If I was a security Guard Without reason i would just ban them as soon as i seen the scangery fuckers walking towards the till. No entry, No reason. I dont know any cinema house that carries a no scanger policy but mine would.

All I know is i'm going to see district 9 in peace I'l go after midnight and alone if I have to.

We

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Vf3VzVbrXU

so good
wait till 45~ seconds in, if your getting bored

kumate_champ07

this might help
http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.4355

Amalgam

kumate_champ07 wrote: »

this might help
http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.4355

Do you like tumours?

JuliusCaesar

fonril wrote: »

But the most annoying was an older couple (late 40's early 50's age) who ALWAYS seemed to end up sitting in front of me & my other half and would talk throughout the whole film, in a normal (non-hushed) voice. Took my mother to the cinema a couple of times and she thought it was perfectly ok to talk too, .... she just thought she was at home watching a big telly....

I think that's the problem with the talkers - they forget they're not at home.

The **** and gropers have always been there....Although I did interrupt a couple behind me, way back in the 80s when their passion got too noisy for me - they stopped (making noise; I didn't care about the rest as they wre behind me)

Jay D

homerun_homer wrote: »

Went to see Che last night in the cinema and a bunch of pikeys walked in half an hour into it, dressed like they were going out to a club, phones ringing, constantly talking ("I can't read subtitles") and being a general annoyance. The screen was small and they were scattered everywhere so there was no avoiding them. I wanted to walk out when they came in but I was on a date and it was a bit of a catch 22 as to what would ruin it more. Eventually the subtitles got the best of them and they left. Shouting "Adios Amigos" to the whole cinema as they went.


Of course staff didn't check in until after they left, only then did they frequently pop in to make sure there was no disturbances.

I'm sick of this Sh!t always happening.

Anyone else got annoying cinema stories?

Can't believe this wasn't actually brought up before. These bastárds do my bloody head in. Like seriously, staff do nothing, hate when they get on their phone, tell them shhh, they turn around and shout **** off.

Árse wipes of the highest order.

Bandit12

Does'nt happen where i go to the cinema (Dundrum). I guess if you live in a scummer area (blanch,tallaght etc...) your fecked.

cazzylonglegs

The best example are the group of girly girls who go see a horror film. They will scream loudly and then errupt into fits of laughter.........I was like that when I was 16

mathie

Bandit12 wrote: »

Does'nt happen where i go to the cinema (Dundrum). I guess if you live in a scummer area (blanch,tallaght etc...) your fecked.

As opposed to non-scummer areas where you just can't spell.

Gummy Panda

cazzylonglegs wrote: »

The best example are the group of girly girls who go see a horror film. They will scream loudly and then errupt into fits of laughter.........I was like that when I was 16

They're the best!! I always sit beside them

"Aww, thats not scary. Panda will look after you. Have some of my popcorn. Just dig deep... deeper.. deeper.."

giggsy664

Bandit12 wrote: »

Does'nt happen where i go to the cinema (Dundrum). I guess if you live in a scummer area (blanch,tallaght etc...) your fecked.

But in Dundrum you have people going: "Oh moy Gosh! Did he just, loike, kill her?"

"That's Roish"

"Oh, when the films loike, over, lets totally, loike, ring Domino's"

"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahah"

@Gummypanda: As soon as I get my PS3 fixed, I'm deleting you from my friends list :P

Antar Bolaeisk

It really is getting worse and worse, in the last few years we've had to employ a bouncer on Friday Nights to try and keep things under control but when you get stupid fat wenches going to a film to get sloshed (with the result of said fat wench applying all of her ungainly mass to a row of seats as she ungraciously fell over them in the middle of a film, ripping them out of the floor) what can we do. The majority of people working in the cinema are kids who can't deal with these people or, worse, have to face them in school the next day. The dark screens don't help either as it can be impossible to see what is going on in the nooks and crannies.

Unfortunately, the staff are not omnipresent either and we would always encourage customers to alert us to any problems coming between you and you're enjoyment of the film whether that is the picture slightly off center or the scumbags up the back firing sweets (an immediate out in my eyes). I even encourage people to phone us from the screen and let us know there is a problem* so they don't even have to leave the film.

Ultimately it is just a case of ill-mannered people not even aware that what they are doing is annoying other people (except the scumbags who are well aware) and there are certain situations where people have to stand up for themselves and confront talkers and phoners beside them who are disturbing their cinema experience.

*This is the only time using a phone in a screen is acceptable