Stupid Smart Women

cuckoo

I think the OP does have a point....not about the 'look of despair' though.

*ducks*

No, really. It saddens me, and angers me, when i sometimes find myself doing it. Somehow i have less of a belief in my opinions and worldview than the majority of men that i know. I'll still argue my case, ask questions and hold forth, but i'm not as sure of my views as men of my acquaintance.

Maybe i'm just being drowned out by their louder, deeper voices. Or, maybe they're more comfortable with turning it into a battlefield and fighting their corner.

/pulls on Hat of Generalisation

When current affairs are being discussed my experience has been that men are more likely to use the phrase "no, you're wrong", and women are more likely to attack the opinion, eg, "no, that's the wrong way of looking at it".

shellyboo

Nuravictus wrote: »

@shellyboo

This is kinda a side question. Why do you not have a interest in current affairs. It strikes me as madness not to be informed & know whats going on in the world because what happens in the world affects us. If we are informed we can prepare or be ready for most issues when they happen.

:rolleyes:

Did you read my post? Clearly I have an interest in current affairs, I do it for a living. I love my job.

I also said I read three newspapers a day, I listen to Morning Ireland, I'm on RTE.ie all day... so I am in fact informed, and I am well aware that that what happens in the world affects us. However, it's not something I want to have a conversation about socially, because I find it dull to say the least. I am far, far more interested in talking about things that are closer to home. If I'm at a press conference or a business thing, yeah, I'll talk about current affairs. But if I'm out socially it's literally the last thing I want to talk about.

Nuravictus

shellyboo wrote: »

:rolleyes:

Did you read my post? Clearly I have an interest in current affairs, I do it for a living. I love my job.

I also said I read three newspapers a day, I listen to Morning Ireland, I'm on RTE.ie all day... so I am in fact informed, and I am well aware that that what happens in the world affects us. However, it's not something I want to have a conversation about socially, because I find it dull to say the least. I am far, far more interested in talking about things that are closer to home. If I'm at a press conference or a business thing, yeah, I'll talk about current affairs. But if I'm out socially it's literally the last thing I want to talk about.

Yea I looked at your post but I was just wondering, I know your informed but its not cause you want to be its cause your job demands it. That was my point.

copacetic wrote: »

jeez, How does a normal conversation develop into you quizzing people on world history when they obviously aren't interested?



I can picture it now.



Girl come in to pub all wrapped up. 'Feckin Baltic out there it is'



Nuravictus : 'Certainly is, you are wrapped up well though, unlike the Germans at stalingrad in '43, boy did they underestimate the cold. Do you think it was a turning point in the war?'



Girl :< look of despair>

You sir are trolling me hard :P

tech77

copacetic wrote: »

jeez, How does a normal conversation develop into you quizzing people on world history when they obviously aren't interested?

I can picture it now.

Girl come in to pub all wrapped up. 'Feckin Baltic out there it is'

Nuravictus : 'Certainly is, you are wrapped up well though, unlike the Germans at stalingrad in '43, boy did they underestimate the cold. Do you think it was a turning point in the war?'

Girl :< look of despair>

LMAO.
Funny, although a bit unfair to the OP's argument about how these topics can arise.

Galvasean

Nuravictus wrote: »

I don't try do the whole I know more than you & I always listen to other peoples points, I dont belittle peoples points of view when I chat with them like most "opinionated" people do.

That's cool.
Oh just for the record I wasn't putting words in 'commas' to be sarcastic/belittling, just 'highlighting' them.

shellyboo

Nuravictus wrote: »

Yea I looked at your post but I was just wondering, I know your informed but its not cause you want to be its cause your job demands it. That was my point.

Yes, my job demands it, but I chose my job, my career field. Besides, you have to have a certain level of interest in current affairs to be a journalist, especially if like me you don't have a degree in it. The nation's media is not filling its offices with people who aren't interested, in fact there's fierce competition for writing jobs. You're not going to get anywhere if you're not informed, and if you're not interested you'll never be informed.

The newspapers I read every day are not the ones I would choose if I was picking a paper, and my point was that it's only because I do read them that I avoid news elsewhere. I'm looking at it all day long. If I'm on holidays, I'll buy a paper, I'll watch the news. But I still don't want to debate the finer points of the Lisbon Treaty when I'm out socially.

Nuravictus

shellyboo wrote: »

Yes, my job demands it, but I chose my job, my career field. Besides, you have to have a certain level of interest in current affairs to be a journalist, especially if like me you don't have a degree in it. The nation's media is not filling its offices with people who aren't interested, in fact there's fierce competition for writing jobs. You're not going to get anywhere if you're not informed, and if you're not interested you'll never be informed.

The newspapers I read every day are not the ones I would choose if I was picking a paper, and my point was that it's only because I do read them that I avoid news elsewhere. I'm looking at it all day long. If I'm on holidays, I'll buy a paper, I'll watch the news. But I still don't want to debate the finer points of the Lisbon Treaty when I'm out socially.

Yea I see your point if it was my job I wouldnt be mad on talking about it like you are. And If I could be dancing & having fun neither would I

Red Hand

Sometimes, people don't want to talk about serious current affairs. You spend a morning working away hard, you come to lunch and your table and workmates are imitating Questions and Answers, right down to the frigid Arctic anticyclonic lack of humour, deep frowns on all faces...importing George Lee lookalike in from IT who is making deep depressing forecasts "on the state of the public finances".

LightningBolt

I think I know what the OP is trying to get at but has made a complete hash of putting his point across. The kind of talk you're looking for is when you're in the pub on a midweek night with three to four of your mates. The girls I know would have no interest in talking about current affairs. It doesn't mean that their stupid smart, just merely that they've probably worked 40hrs or so and can't be bothered to discuss the rights and wrongs of Israel bombing Gaza over the past week or so. They'd rather talk about themselves, bf's/husbands, travel plans or any other of a million things that interests them and involves them or their friends directly.

On that point I've noticed that girls will always have converse about themselves or others they know personally and will have little issue with talking about personal issues, whereas as us men won't discuss emotional problems with our friends we're more than happy to talk and argue in depth about anything else. I think I've just done what the OP done and made a hash of what I wanted to say:D

b3t4

It's very, very, very seldom (maybe once a year at Christmas) that news reports have anything remotely positive about the world in them. Why on earth would I be bothered with that in a social situation? I'd like my personal life to be filled with more than doom and gloom thank you very much.

Also, I've found from my interactions in such conversations, that the men partaking in such conversations are particularly dismissive of a female interacting in the conversation. It has appeared to me that my opinion has only ever been counted for if one of the males in the group validates it. I now know to stay out of such conversations as they are tedious, boring and full of big egos.

A.

Snowie

Nuravictus wrote: »

Is it ignorance bliss or are there reasons woman in public & around men don’t want to sound overly informed. I’ve had get debates with guys when I was half drunk. I’ve tried many a time to have a nice conversation on a topic with women but it generally comes down to go drink & dance.

So what’s going on ladies?

yeah man its called "Having a good time"
If you want to have a debate join a club.....
Pubs are for good times getting stupid and having a laugh not for arguing over why mary harney has 5 bloody chins and awfull taste in clotheing....

fits

b3t4 wrote: »

Also, I've found from my interactions in such conversations, that the men partaking in such conversations are particularly dismissive of a female interacting in the conversation. It has appeared to me that my opinion has only ever been counted for if one of the males in the group validates it. I now know to stay out of such conversations as they are tedious, boring and full of big egos.

:eek:

Actually OP, this is something I've been thinking about recently too. And I really cant figure out why this is the case sometimes. I wonder is it because a lot of women are afraid of expressing an opinion that may be shot down? I dont know really. I'm probably guilty of that to an extent myself. I'll only enter a debate/argument if I'm reasonably well versed in the ins and outs of it, and can back up my point of view. (caution vs risk takers?)

I have to say it does annoy me sometimes to see lots of men debating a topic and some of the women sitting around silent. I dont think its lack of awareness or interest in the issues that is the cause either.

jellie

maybe theyre not interested in the topics, maybe theyre not interested in discussing them, or maybe just not with you?

Im reasonably intelligent, or I should be by your standards anyway as I have an hons degree and masters, but I dont spend my time discussing politics or current affairs or history..
i listen to the news & have a reasonable idea of whats going on in the world. But to be honest I generally dont discuss it unless I find it particularly interesting or shocking - usually its too fecking depressing to discuss the loss of 1900 jobs in dell or the war in israel.

& as mentioned by someone else, theres certain people i just wouldnt be bothered trying to talk about things with anyway, im not interested in having other peoples opinions forced on me, debates dont interest me, and i generally dont feel the need to justify what i feel/think about thinks.

to be brutally honest, for the most case i just wouldnt be interested.

allabouteve

Nuravictus wrote: »

They are woman and they are very smart because most of them hold an Honours Degree.

Edit: Removed the history part since you are all going mad :P

Sorry, holding a degree displays an ability to achieve academically. It is not an indication of either informed opinion or practical intelligence.

True those who achieve degree status are often more intelligent than those who don't (in general), but it doesn't indicate the ability to verbalise opinions.

nomorebadtown

Nuravictus wrote:

I was browsing these forums many months ago & I seen a...

*head explodes*
So many posters on boards do this!! Right in the middle of a relatively intelligent post, you get "I seen...", "I done...." Drives me up the wall! Learn how to speak correctly you barbarians:mad:

On topic/

I think this is what the OP is getting at..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjxY9rZwNGU

partyguinness

Personally some of the smartest people I know barely did their Leaving Certificate and some did not. Some of the dimmest people I know have several qualifications.

For the record I have a primary, post graduate and a masters in law and a professional qualification. This does not mean I am highly intelligent or more intelligent than someone with less qualifications.

It mostly means I was good at applying myself to exam situations and was committed.

Point being....Don't confuse or equate intelligence with education...I believe thats a mistake people make.

shellyboo

nomorebadtown wrote: »

*head explodes*
So many posters on boards do this!! Right in the middle of a relatively intelligent post, you get "I seen...", "I done...." Drives me up the wall! Learn how to speak correctly you barbarians:mad:

The only thing more boring than discussing current affairs socially is correcting people's spelling and grammar in day-to-day use. He's not submitting an essay, he's writing a post in a forum.

Anyhoo, back on topic... I thought some more about this and not only do I find it boring to chat current affairs, I don't like the type of conversation it results in. The result is usually one of a few things: you realise you don't know as much as you thought and feel stupid, you realise the other person doesn't have a clue what they're talking about and you end up thinking they're stupid, you realise that the person you're talking to has really objectionable views and you end up thinking badly of them, or it ends up in a big heated debate and everyone gets pissed off and it ruins the night.

nomorebadtown

Woops! Sorry for voicing my opinion, your majesty.

fits

shellyboo wrote: »

Anyhoo, back on topic... I thought some more about this and not only do I find it boring to chat current affairs, I don't like the type of conversation it results in. The result is usually one of a few things: you realise you don't know as much as you thought and feel stupid, you realise the other person doesn't have a clue what they're talking about and you end up thinking they're stupid, you realise that the person you're talking to has really objectionable views and you end up thinking badly of them, or it ends up in a big heated debate and everyone gets pissed off and it ruins the night.

Or you might discover some interesting alternative views, find some common ground with other people, or shock horror... learn something!

shellyboo

nomorebadtown wrote: »

Woops! Sorry for voicing my opinion, your majesty.

Meh, I happen to agree with you, but we grammar nazis have a bad enough name with out preying on innocent bystanders

giddybootz

shellyboo wrote: »

Smart does not equal interested in current affairs. Like I say, I read a lot of newspapers, I'm a journalist, I have to. But once I get out of the office I don't watch a tap of news because not only have I been doing it all day, but... snore. I have more interesting things to think about and talk to people about. I'm not running down current affairs as boring, I'm just personally more passionate about my friends and talking with them, about them, what's happening in their lives, other people's lives... things that are real to me, close to home, as opposed to the big wide world.

Are you my twin?

i am the exact same. used to do a radio show about current affairs and we had to come up with a section to keep me interested coz all the doom and gloom and snore of the papers.....Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

but i would still consider myself a smart woman who has plenty to say on topics of interest.

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

Nuravictus

shellyboo wrote: »

Meh, I happen to agree with you, but we grammar nazis have a bad enough name with out preying on innocent bystanders

Anyone who wants to point my terrible grammar out will have to deal with Shellyboo my defender now

Go get them champ :P

donegalfella wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

How so, I have been bad at the written word all my life. We all have our weak & strong points. My main issue my mind rushs ahead when I type & I put the wrong word or something totally wrong in. I came here to have a conversation on this topic to get people thinking about it. There has been many woman who agree & disagree with me. Whether the context or grammar I used is correct it doesnt matter because the topic is still valid.

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

Snowie

leave the god dam grammer out of it not everyone is great at it..

Also buy the way the op worded things The asomption could be he's froma nother country...
eather way its unfair to attack peopels a blity to use ,,,, and .... and''''' and -... I can't spell that well at all but i do make the effort...

People who point out things and only these things should be banned from boards ....

partyguinness

donegalfella wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

Bad grammer in real life is unacceptable and it drives me mad. But on the internet there has to be some allowances for the fact most of us are probably at work and writting quickly This does not allow much time for spelling checks.

Taking issue with bad grammer etc on a forum is just petty (and anally retentive) when it does not alter the point being made by the poster.

Get over it.:rolleyes:

stovelid

shellyboo wrote: »

Meh, I happen to agree with you, but we grammar nazis have a bad enough name without preying on innocent bystanders

You do indeed.

/edit: I only do this to grammar Nazis

Dudess

Nuravictus wrote: »

My social circle or rather people I know & meet consists of many doctors & engineers. They are woman and they are very smart because most of them hold an Honours Degree. The issue comes with the fact if I asked them some point of common knowledge on something goings on in the world, I get the Smile of despair, where they laugh the question off as if it wasn’t a question at all. I wouldn’t worry if it was one or two woman but it’s all of them.

However there is a good way to get woman into a debate on matters of abortion, you all go mad when that comes up but the other topics like religion, politics & general goings on in the world woman in general seem to think it’s better to be ignorance of these things. I know thats a very large generalisation but it is true to my experience.

And mine frankly. I rarely have conversations with females about politics etc, whereas I regularly have them with males. And yeah, those females are smart and educated.

Nuravictus

Anyhow lets get this back on subject.

gogglebok

monkeyfudge wrote: »

I do come across smart women who dumb themselves down a lot though. It's usually so they can fit into a certain social grouping where they're surrounded by dumb people who only discuss soaps and reality TV shows.

Intelligent conversation is based on the nature of the the talk rather than its subject, surely? An intelligent conversation about soap or reality tv is more intelligent than a dumb chat about Gaza.

Is it possible that men will value a loud rant about politics more than whatever "ordinary" conversation they interrupted with it?

I also think a lot of the silence of women during heated conversations is because they're used to not getting a word in. Men are gobsmackingly rude to women in conversation, as a matter of routine. Or, to put that more neutrally, men and women have different types of conversational etiquette which can result in male monopoly of the discussion.