Obituary.

galwayrush

This is a very sad case from the UK. Could it, or is it happening here?:eek:


'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
Why the early bird gets the worm;
Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Elastoplast to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, It's Not My Fault, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.'

And a little extra........................> >
Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 600 employees and has the following statistics? 29 have been accused of spouse abuse, 7 have been arrested for fraud, 19 have been accused of writing bad cheques, 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses, 3 have done time for assault, 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit, 4 have been arrested on drug-related charges, 8 have been arrested for shoplifting, 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits, 84 have been arrested for drink driving in the last year. Which organisation is this? It's the 635 members of the House of Commons, the same group that cranks out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line. I rest my case.> > >

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AlmightyCushion

That's not an obituary, that's a novel. Obituaries should be like a mini-skirt. Short and tarty sweet.

galwayrush

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

That's not an obituary, that's a novel. Obituaries should be like a mini-skirt. Short and tarty sweet.

OK, Common sense died.:p

themadchef

galwayrush wrote: »

Knowing when to come in out of the rain;

"If you told me it was raining i would have put a coat on"

Someone actually said that to me once.

MoominPapa

Is that the opening monologue form tonights Noels HQ?

Epic Tissue

I'm pretty sure that did the email rounds years ago

How very daily mail.

j1smithy

"Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen." Albert Einstein got it right. Have to agree with the poster above, how very Daily Heil.

ejmaztec

Glad to see that we're not mourning the passing of our two old pals Copy and Paste. Where would we be without them? :P

j1smithy

This is neither a cool vid nor pic nor link... so why was it moved here? Dare I say it some sort of bin might have been more appropriate.

ejmaztec

j1smithy wrote: »

This is neither a cool vid nor pic nor link... so why was it moved here? Dare I say it some sort of bin might have been more appropriate.

You'd think that some people would have more common sense wouldn't you? :pac:

minxie

ejmaztec wrote: »

You'd think that some people would have more common sense wouldn't you? :pac:

sure its miserable outside what else would we
have for doing???