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Young Parents

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  • 22-01-2009 4:45pm
    #1
    Stylesclash1702
    Closed Accounts Posts: 129 ✭✭


    hi,
    Im a 23 year old father of two and my girlfriend is 22 and we're happy in our relationship hoping to get married and not just for the kids before somone brings that up.
    We have a two and a half year old girl and a one year old boy, two of the best kids you could ever meet.
    We were lucky enough that we were both ready for children( just about).
    We were ready to settle down and lead a life of a family that the kifds needed.
    But around me i see couples people we know having kids and them being the same age as us not ready still wanting to be young and free.

    My question is "Is it ok for young couples to have kids?"

    Your thoughts or anything you think


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    #2
    January
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,862 ✭✭✭✭January


    Of course it's OK for young couples to have children!

    I'm in a similar position to yourself except for my boyfriend is 30 years old. I'm 21. I have a 6 week old daughter and although she was unplanned, I was ready for her. She has brought so much to our lives.

    If you are ready, then screw what your friends want. Just do what makes you and your girlfriend happy!


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    #3
    foxy06
    Registered Users Posts: 2,138 ✭✭✭foxy06


    I was 20 when I had my first and it was the best thing I ever did. Really grounded me and I now have 2 kids and just got married to their dad last year. I am 27 now. I do have other friends though that it didn't seem to suit very well.......


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    #4
    IsThatSo?
    Closed Accounts Posts: 988 ✭✭✭IsThatSo?


    Stylesclash1702 wrote: »
    But around me i see couples people we know having kids and them being the same age as us not ready still wanting to be young and free.

    I think you can be prepared for children, but not necessarily be ready until you have to do it, if that makes sense :) Basically, how can anyone be ready for something they have no experience and little knowledge of!! I have a six year old, as my eldest he is my ongoing lesson on how to raise children lol.

    Your friends will have to find their own way. Its not really up to you to judge whether a couple is "ready" or not, that is their business. I am sure some people may have said that to/about yourself and your partner (though I hope not to you, that would be very insulting) but would you have appreciated the comment? Probably not :)

    Yes, I do believe its ok for young couple to have kids. Any person these days in their 30's or 40's had young parents and we survived. Ages for becoming parents is a trend/cyclical, so it will come around to young parents again, then go back to "older" parents.


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    #5
    DinoBot
    Registered Users Posts: 699 ✭✭✭DinoBot


    "Is it ok for young couples to have kids?", NO WAY !!



    Only messing :P

    I think the deal with having kids is: It works really well if both parents are ready, the age of the parents doesn't really matter (to a degree!). Im sure there are people in their 30's having kids for the first time but still want to be young :D

    If you survive having kids when your young it pays off being young when they reach their teens.

    OP, Do you think its ok for young couples to have kids ?


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    #6
    nesf
    Registered Users Posts: 27,645 ✭✭✭✭nesf


    Pfft, when I saw the thread title I thought you were talking about 13-14 year olds. There's nothing wrong with having kids in your twenties. It can be a tad awkward with friends when they don't have kids but anyone who doesn't have time for you because you're "not out enough" isn't worth having as a friend anyway to be blunt about it.


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    #7
    embee
    Registered Users Posts: 2,890 ✭✭✭embee


    To echo what everyone else has said, of course it's "okay" to have children in your twenties.

    Case in point - my own parents. My mother was 19 when she started her family and 23 when she had her third. My Dad is the same age as my Mam.

    Cut to now - their oldest child was 30 last month, I've just turned 28 and my sister will be 26 in April. My parents are both only 49 and have had adult children since their early 40's. They do loads of stuff now that they couldn't have done when we were all small - they're away on hols right now as we speak, they're building their own house, they're financially sounder than a lot of people their age because their kids are grown up. There are flipsides to being a young parent, in that you have to grow up very quickly when you have your children young and mayhe you do miss out on a lot of the stuff that 20 somethings get up to as young, free and single, but the benefits of young parenthood come when your kids are grown and you're still young enough to enjoy your life. My folks have both still got 15 years of work to do before they retire, and in that regard, they're not stuck in a situation where they're starting to draw a pension whilst they still have teenagers at home. In a lot of ways they are very lucky, and they know that.

    They're also grandparents now too (just one grandchild so far, they became grandparents at the lofty age of 46!) but they're young enough that they can run around with my daughter, play with her etc. and aren't knackered tired, they've no major health complaints and can enjoy "active" grandparenting.

    I had my daughter when I was 25, I'll be the same age as my parents are now when she's in her mid-twenties, and I'm glad of that. One of my best friends from school who is my age (28) has a Dad who will be 82 in May, I just can't get my head around that at all. My own Granny is 84!


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