After hours confessions.

Napper Hawkins

johnn wrote: »

Thug.

Bollox, the bottle that missed his head could have been the end of him or at least caused some major damage had it been a direct hit. If anything, the saps who threw it got off lightly in my opinion.

Darraghnormal

I killed my brother so i could take the one ring as my own.

Funkfield

In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max’s toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog…When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I went nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out…But the worst thing I ever done — I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa — and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.

Ganymede Glow

When I was in 3rd year I was sent to the principals office for being a bold little boy. Anyway when I arrive in the office there is nobody there an it is just me stood in the office all alone. To my surprise I notice a press half open with 2 shiny brand new litre bottles of Jameson sitting pretty. Actually one was opened with a small bit gone but still rather full.

So I stole them! Me and my mates got rather drunk that night, pulled a bird, got sick, came in at all hours, got a bollickin of the parents and woke up with a huge hangover. I am not proud of what I did...........nor am I ashamed, it happened and I'll move on. She shouldnt have been drinking in the office on school hours anyway the oul bat:D

AnonoBoy

I'm the one-armed man that Dick Kimble was looking for.

Jimmy Bottlehead

The money wasn't really just resting in my account.

sbsquarepants

My ex's sister hated me (the feeling was mutual), so once when i was forced to visit her house, i took my revenge in the most ancient and honorable fashion - i pissed on her toothbrush and put it back in it's holder!
Makes me smile to this day:)

Pighead

Until 2005, Pighead had always thought that Tom Jones was a black man. Think it was due to the below album that had always been lying about the house during Pighead's formative years.

http://www.classicrockmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/TomJones1.jpg

rainbowdrop

javaboy wrote: »

Right so that's one musical mystery solved. Now if we can just figure out who Carly Simon was on about we'll be set.

That song was about me.........

alwaysadub

rainbowdrop wrote: »

That song was about me.........

You're so vain!

Latchy

rainbowdrop wrote: »

That song was about me.........

You probably think this post is about you , dont you, dont you !

irishejit

I used to frequent a certain grassy knoll......

Latchy

irishejit wrote: »

I used to frequent a certain grassy knoll......

You're not George Michael are ya ?

Guill

Deleted User wrote: »

When I was a young gossum,I was offered ecstacy at a house party, I politely accepted but being a sensible young guy,I dropped in a bowl outside.

A few weeks later, I was at the same house and the lady of the house told me that the dog had spent about a week in his doghouse without leaving.Literally frightened of anything it saw.As I left the house, I noticed that the bowl by the door had "Woof"'s name on it.:(
That is my confession.

praise the lord.

Ya plank, fair play for not taking it but don't you think that you should have disposed of it properly? What if a kid picked it up?

irishejit

Latchy wrote: »

You're not George Michael are ya ?

Ha ha a more famous "shooter" than that!!!

Guill wrote: »

Ya plank, fair play for not taking it but don't you think that you should have disposed of it properly? What if a kid picked it up?

*Fights the urge to make Die Hard 3 joke*

jackiebaron

Used to go out to Dublin airport and buy bags of crisps and chocolate bars then chew them up and spit the vile combination down onto the windscreens of the rental cars. The stuff used to look like a combination of puke and sh!t.

Princess Peach

I've been very naughty lately.

Kimono-Girl

Princess Peach wrote: »

I've been very naughty lately.

are you going to confess what you did that was naughty??

Latchy

irishejit wrote: »

Ha ha a more famous "shooter" than that!!!

It was Ruby wasn't it ? :cool:

Princess Peach wrote: »

I've been very naughty lately.

You being tucking into the yougurt in the wee small hrs again ?

Oh .......ok details

Princess Peach

Kimono-Girl wrote: »

are you going to confess what you did that was naughty??

Hmmmmmmmm.... no.

irishejit

Latchy wrote: »

It was Ruby wasn't it ? :cool:

You got me!!!! :D:D

Guill

Me: I confess to all mighty god and to you my brothers and sisters that i have sinned in my own rite.

Priest: Okay, what do you want to confess?

Me: I didn't get the turf for mammy when she asked me to.

Priest: Anything else?

Me: Nope.

Priest: you sure?

Me: Yea.

Priest: what about the other day i seen you stealing apples from my orchard?

me:..........................eh......

Priest: Well?

Me: Yea that too.

Priest 100 Hail marys!

Me: Your not going to tell me Ma are you?

homerun_homer

I did it ok... It was me!!

I killed Reverend Greene in the library with the candlestick.