I want a baby but g/f doesnt....

g2020

Hi ladies,

Im very sorry for postinhg here for such a random question, i was just looking for some advice and i have nowhere else to ask.

Anyway since im sure you gathered from my original post im desperate to have a baby. Im only 24 and im sure that this seems like a strange predicament to most of you girls on here.

My girlfriend is 22 and is constantly mentioning the idea of being married and having children soon in her life but i constantly hear between 4-6 years.


Anyway besides careful hints, is it posibbly to convinces a girl to marry before she says she's ready, ignoring the fact that both our parents want it to happen.


P.s Im not being forced into anything by the way but im genuinely ready to look after a chikd.



Thank you for ANY advice Ladies.

g2020

I've just re-read that and i apologise for the ****ty spelling and grammar.

Black Swan

g2020 wrote: »

My girlfriend is 22 and is constantly mentioning the idea of being married and having children soon in her life but i constantly hear between 4-6 years.

Have you asked her why she wants to delay? Seems that you two need to get to know each other a bit better before tying the knot, or you would already know the answer?

RacoonQueen

Maybe she feels she's too young. She's only 22 ffs.

liah

I don't think it's particularly fair of you to ask this of her.

Having children is a humongous step and once you have them your life is dedicated to them, and you lose quite a bit of your independence. And for her, I can understand her reluctance as it would most likely be her doing the majority of the work. Having a child is hard on a woman and if she's not ready you can't push it on her, it would just build resentment between you and her. I would respect her wishes and wait until she's ready.

She's young yet and you both have a lot of living to do, why on earth would you want to be tied down with kids already?

Overheal

As a child of a divorce, she sounds like she's being pretty rational to me. Children are a lifetime comittment - more so than marriage, ironically. While you might have all the know-how and instincts in place to want to rear a child with her, theres social factors to take into consideration here, which is why it mightn't be a bad idea to hold off. After all, you aren't even enganged.

I would think you'd want to both want to be in a strong, stable married-situation for a while and have that foundation to work with before you bring something as inherently chaotic as a child into your world.

...Can we interest you in a Puppy for the meantime?

womanlikeaman

Well you see i fully appreciate what people are saying about us being too young and i very much understand it.

I would never ever push her into anything (as if she would let me)


But i would be quite prepared to prpose to her (not for that reason), i just dont know how one would go abould it at such a young age??




I would do it soon because im fairly sure she would accept. Im just young and wouldnt know how to go about it.

The Sweeper

g2020 wrote: »

P.s Im not being forced into anything by the way but im genuinely ready to look after a child.

How do you know?

Overheal

womanlikeaman wrote: »

But i would be quite prepared to prpose to her (not for that reason), i just dont know how one would go abould it at such a young age??

Proposal and Business Proposal are not mutually exclusive. Your basically telling them I value you, and I can make this work, and I can do everything you need me to do. If you're ready and able to do all of that (support a family/mortage/life together) and if you love her and can see yourself sticking it out to the long run (even if that means waiting until you are settled for a couple years before getting into baby drama, or staying together for the kids if times get tough) then sure, fire away, propose to her.

But what I've heard twice now,

at such a young age??

Im only 24

Is that you sound like have not reached that stage yet personally, where you really feel like you are Grown Up, and able to do everything that marriage and family-rearing involves. You may be well on your way, but you aren't there yet.

womanlikeaman

Financially i know that im alright,

Going out with my friends and getting drunk no longer appeals,


I adore spending time babysitting me little cousin for weekends at a time,


Im saving at least 75% of what i earn to get a mortgage with a couple of years.



and p.s my mother has runa crece all my life and i adore children.





Enough of a reason\?

Overheal

womanlikeaman wrote: »

Financially i know that im alright,

Going out with my friends and getting drunk no longer appeals,

I adore spending time babysitting me little cousin for weekends at a time,

Im saving at least 75% of what i earn to get a mortgage with a couple of years.

and p.s my mother has runa crece all my life and i adore children.

Enough of a reason\?

Babysitting your cousins and Rearing a child 24/7/365/18 are very different Bowling Leagues. Again, I'd reconsider what I said in my original post before going ahead and conceiving:

"I would think you'd want to both want to be in a strong, stable married-situation for a while and have that foundation to work with before you bring something as inherently chaotic as a child into your world."



PS whats with the dual accounts?

The Sweeper

Overheal wrote: »

PS whats with the dual accounts?

Yeah, indeed, you're seriously not going to settle down easily with your girlfriend if you're in love with your mate's bird and have been for six years. You have about 30 seconds to explain yourself.

Overheal

I hate expending my best advice on shenannigan posters

The Sweeper

Thread closed and both accounts, g2020 and womanlikeaman, suspended until I get a PM from the poster explaining exactly what he/she/it thinks they're doing.