Homophobic complaint re thread and unacceptable PM from a mod

patrickmooney

I have been a member and posted on boards.ie since 2002. I love this site. The mod I've complained to told me to post here.

I am a member of a minority here on boards, a gay member. I read the following thread and felt I needed to object.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=59036123#post59036123

The grounds of my complaint are the poster only finds issue with "gay" camp people. Straights are fine, but gay is a problem.

Boards is read by teenagers, young adults, many of whom read afterhours for advice. Now if they are gay and frightened to come out, but thread certainly doesn't help. As a gay member who isn't out to all, I find personal offence to this post and it's attack on only the gay community.

I reported the post to be told my options had been overruled, because Terry knows 5 gay people, 2 of which are camp. What?

The full thread of our PMs is below. Are boards really backing this mod up and the view expressed on that thread?
Originally Posted by Terry

Objection over-ruled.
I do actually know two gay people like that.
I know a total of five gay people.

I'm not saying 40% of gay people are like that, but it does happen.

I didn't find it objectionable as I have seen it happen.

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Originally Posted by patrickmooney

As a gay man I know more then 4 or 5 gay people. I still find this post offensive. I am not asking you to overrule my opinion. I am shocked at what you have just said above. Do you moderate only this section of boards

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Originally Posted by Terry

Sorry, the objection over-ruled bit was meant to be left out.

My point is that I have witnessed this behaviour.
The Op did not state that this was uniqure to gay people or something all gay people do. He was just pissed off with the ones who do act in that manner.

Yes, I only moderate the two forums listed on the right there.

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Originally Posted by patrickmooney

His post is still an attack on gay people. There are plenty of straight people who act camp, dress up as women etc. Does he find this a problem. No, it's only gay people who are camp he dislikes. To quote him "I'm not painting all gays with the same brush, just those who act this way.". Not right when there lots of teens reading this site, afraid to come out. I've posted your comments on queerid as this forum somehow thinks gays are different and camp is not normal...... http://www.queerid.com/topic.aspx?topicid=15899

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Originally Posted by Terry

I really think you are taking this far too personally.
Now you can post that there and have a lot of people coming from there coming over to boards and having a go at me, but attacks from other forums never end well (not a threat). Your buddies there will be banned if they get any way abusive.

Anyway, it was a sarcastic reply to the post I quoted. I'm sorry you didn't see it that way, but that's what it was.

I can only surmise from your reaction that you are not a regular in AH.

If you have any further problems with this, I suggest you use the help desk forum.

Gordon

The impression I got with the OP of that thread was not that the OP has problem with homosexuals but he has a problem with homosexuals with an overly camp act that is put on. He mentioned cases where people were openly shouting out to people to perform acts of fellatio on him and he didn't like this. He doesn't seem to be suggesting that he doesn't like gay people.

No idea why you pointed out another website to Terry.

What is the unacceptable PM you received?

patrickmooney

Thanks Gordan.

The PM I didn't accept was the first. Printed above and repeat below:

Originally Posted by Terry
Objection over-ruled.

I know Terry took this back, but it's a little weird for a mod to over-rule my personal feeling of offence.

Gordon

But he took it back.

patrickmooney

Gordon wrote: »

But he took it back.

Only after I challenged him on it. As a rep of boards.ie, his first responses should be thought out and worded correctly. On the back of his initial response (and no other ones as he had not communicated) I did post on queerid, which terry is now actively posting on.

Anyhow my complaint remains along with my original objection to the thread in questions on the grounds of supporting/encouraging hate towards the gay community. Aspects of my sexuality have already been attacked on this thread. I find this unacceptable as a long standing member of boards.ie.

Gordon

patrickmooney wrote: »

Only after I challenged him on it. As a rep of boards.ie, his first responses should be thought out and worded correctly. On the back of his initial response (and no other ones as he had not communicated) I did post on queerid, which terry is now actively posting on.

We get rakes of pms from users every day, the odd slip up happens. He has explained his mistake. How would you like this resolved to your satisfaction?

Anyhow my complaint remains along with my original objection to the thread in questions on the grounds of supporting/encouraging hate towards the gay community. Aspects of my sexuality have already been attacked on this thread. I find this unacceptable as a long standing member of boards.ie.

The OP doesn't seem to be doing that as I mentioned earlier. He is not supporting hate towards the gay community, he's talking about people that openly shout about fellatio etc. When has your sexuality been attacked?

patrickmooney

Gordon wrote: »

We get rakes of pms from users every day, the odd slip up happens. He has explained his mistake. How would you like this resolved to your satisfaction?

The OP doesn't seem to be doing that as I mentioned earlier. He is not supporting hate towards the gay community, he's talking about people that openly shout about fellatio etc. When has your sexuality been attacked?

Personally I'd like the thread either locked or removed, it's spun out of control and very much so off topic.

Re my sexuality, I took up someone on their view that they almost vomit when they see/hear an effeminate gay people to be told:

Originally Posted by jackpalance View Post
Yeah, well we can't all have your gag reflex.

Naturally this is attacking my sexuality, that as a male and homosexual, I somehow have a a better gag reflex (due to certain sexual practices I assume). Again not very nice.

Gordon

patrickmooney wrote: »

Personally I'd like the thread either locked or removed, it's spun out of control and very much so off topic.

I'm sure the mods will lock it if it's off topic or spun out of control. You want the thread deleted or removed because it's gone off topic and out of control? That would leave very few threads on boards if we did it to all threads

Re my sexuality, I took up someone on their view that they almost vomit when they see/hear an effeminate gay people to be told:

Originally Posted by jackpalance View Post
Yeah, well we can't all have your gag reflex.

Naturally this is attacking my sexuality, that as a male and homosexual, I somehow have a a better gag reflex (due to certain sexual practices I assume). Again not very nice.

That's not attacking your sexuality imo, but it's definitely insulting you personally. If I were you I'd report the post if you feel personally slighted by that comment that was directed at you.

It's a shame that people, when they see something that they feel offends them, want to close discussion and remove the history of the offence. Why you can't take the higher ground and actually move this life-form of human beings forward into supreme enlightenment by showing people all sides of the coin, and stopping ignorance by teaching from experience baffles me. Instead you want to delete and suppress the history.

patrickmooney

Gordon wrote: »

I'm sure the mods will lock it if it's off topic or spun out of control. You want the thread deleted or removed because it's gone off topic and out of control? That would leave very few threads on boards if we did it to all threads

That's not attacking your sexuality, it's insulting you personally. If I were you I'd report the post if you feel personally slighted by that comment that was directed at you.

It's a shame that people, when they see something that they feel offends them, want to close discussion and remove the history of the offence. Why you can't take the higher ground and actually move this life-form of human beings forward into supreme enlightenment by showing people all sides of the coin, and stopping ignorance by teaching from experience baffles me. Instead you want to delete and suppress the history.

Thus locking is best. The thread over on QID which Terry is posting on is being locked (Actually deleted due to attacks). It's your site, your the mod, please do as feel fit. Terry has admitted to not being on boards.ie for the last hour on QID and I certainly don't trust his mod skills if I do go reporting to him.

It's in your hands. My objections and observations about this thread still stand. My highlighting is so can you monitor and uphold the standards I expect from boards.ie.

Thanks a mil!

P

Gordon

patrickmooney wrote: »

Thus locking is best. The thread over on QID which Terry is posting on is being locked. It's your site, your the mod, please do as feel fit. Terry has admitted to not being on boards.ie for the last hour on QID and I certainly don't trust his mod skills if I do go reporting to him.

It's not my site. If QID wants to lock threads then it's no concern of mine. If Terry hasn't been on boards for the last hour then I'm unhappy about it but I'll dock his salary by 4% to make up for lost time.

It's in your hands. My objections and observations about this thread still stand. My highlighting is so can you monitor and uphold the standards I expect from boards.ie.

Thanks a mil!

P

Thank you for highlighting this, I have taken on board what you have said. Although you don't seem to have read my thoughts, I hope you have taken on board what I have said. I am highlighting this so that you can uphold and monitor the standards that I expect from a sentient being that wishes the world to work in harmony, and has the tools to do so: an internetputer and fingers.

DeVore

You reacted pretty strongly towards Terry saying "Objection overuled" as you took it to mean he was overruling your opinion ("I am not asking you to overrule my opinion.")

All the same you are perfectly happy to stop all discussion on a topic which isnt inciting hatred towards gays. Seems slightly hypocritical.

Afterhours is a bit of a charnel house at times, you might be better sticking to Humanities and staying away from it.

I'm not wild about the thread myself, it speaks of a lack of class amongst other things but then, AH isnt exactly classy. Would you prefer if we whitewashed society and pretended these opinions didnt exist? I dont think papering over the cracks is a particularly good response.

DeV.

DeVore

Having reread that thread, I think your approach and your objection are misguided. I think its very much a lively discussion of the topic and there seem to be quite a number of people ripping on the OP and backing you as there are supporters of the idea. Either way, the topic is aired and the ideas and prejudices exposed and perhaps challenged.

Jesus, maybe even a few readers might change their minds!


Or we could sweep it under the carpet. Or even put it in a closet! (j/k)

DeV.

patrickmooney

Thanks Devore for looking into this. I can't support that thead so I've deleted all my contributions. Gordon asked what I would like to resolve this. I gave him two options, both he said no to both. Can I ask you to remove any posts from this thread which use my name or quote one of my deleted posts. I do not want my handle, which is used professionally, linked to a thread and quotes by people on this thread.

Thanks.

DeVore

We allow a 48 hour period of grace for people to come back and edit their posts on "mature recollection". I fully understand your desire to remove your posts and have no argument about that.

What I cant do is white wash history. If you said it and then retracted it, but in the mean time someone else quoted it and commented on it, its not really fair to remove their comment just because you have had a change of heart.

Would you be happy if I removed some point you made because the original author had had second thoughts?

What I can do is take action if something actionable is said about you. Simply post a link here and if it IS actionable we'll exercise our duty of care.


Personal Opinion:
I think you are wrong to simply run from this argument. You (and indeed now *I*) have the weight of logic on our side and perhaps some GOOD can come from it. But burying collective heads and pretending like ugly prejudice doesnt exist is never going to change it. Confronting it with cold logic and solid argument will at least win over the "reasonable" people and to hell with the muppets.

DeV.