On a date, who do you think should pay?

MadelineNYC

who should pay on a date?

Always the man?
The woman?
Split the cost?
Whoever did the inviting for the date?

Mr. Presentable

Let's face it; one way or another the guy always pays.

Mr. Presentable

nipplenuts wrote: »

Let's face it; one way or another the guy always pays.

But actually the invitor, as the other is a guest.

Chinafoot

nipplenuts wrote: »

Let's face it; one way or another the guy always pays.

What does that even mean? Seriously.

As to the topic at hand...I'm all for going dutch.

1huge1

I'd go with the invitor.

Rebel021

Grow up and pay your own way
Although I have always paid apart from a few girls who insisit on going Dutch

Chinafoot

Rebel021 wrote: »

Grow up and pay your own way

Eh, want to calm down there? The OP asked a question. At no point did she say she felt the man should pay for everything.

Poccington

Personally, I've no problem with paying for myself and my lady friend.

If a girl wants to pay her own way though, I'm not gonna try stop them or any of that malarkey.

Creamy Goodness

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055404449

/thread

PrivateEye

I tend not to allow 'em to put the hand in the póca, theres a good point in letting the invitor pay but who wants to be the bloke seen standing back while see buys the tickets to something/keeps getting the drinks in? The last missus used to insist on paying something blahblah, so the way around that was to take her out and then she'd buy the 'drink on the way home' or something like that, or the popcorn at the cinema, nothing mega- but enough to keep her quiet :pac:


Its probably some old-school gene in men, I know a young one who thinks its almost 'sexist' her boyfriend tends to cover the little things, I don't get that myself. She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named used to get me little gifts for nothing which was sweet-as to be honest, it can go both ways.

CathyMoran

I think that in an ideal world the person who asks the other person out should pay but the other person should offer to pay halves (for a first date) afterwards halves or alternating...from my own experience though the relationships that lasted were the ones where the guy paid for the first date (I paid for the second one)...the hubby and I still do it in turns though we do not keep an exact tab.

Stheno

Split the cost?

Or as Cathymoran says, alternating?

I just don't get this "As a bloke, I would always pay" thing at all. And as for "who wants to be the bloke seen standing back while see buys the tickets to something/keeps getting the drinks in?" who cares?

RxQueen

always pay my own way , or if he did pay id pay the next time

hate the way some girl thing the guy should always pay

minidazzler

It really depends on which date.

But I am a payer for all just because I am a bit of a pushover when it comes to females.

twanda

I am a girl and I also prefer to pay half of the bill. Always have done.
I think in this day and age we shouldn't be expecting the guy to foot the bill.

Twee.

I'll always offer to go halves on a date, or if we're at the cinema, maybe one of us will get the food, the other get the tickets. With my last BF we used to go for lunch somewhere once a week and just alternated the cost.

Placid_Casual

I always offer to pay but if the girl refuses and insists on splitting the bill I wouldn't argue for a second. Personally, I think going Dutch should be the way (we do live in times of supposed equality after all) but i'll always offer because I think it would give a bad impression otherwise. Most girls i've gone out with either insist on going Dutch or else let me pay for dinner, lets say, and then they pay for drinks afterwards, which is fair enough.

If a girl let me pay for everything all night, while I wouldn't say anything, it would leave a negative impression on me. I think i'd kind of feel like I was being used. And no, I wouldn't expect anything "in return", if you know what I mean. Luckily, I haven't really come across too many girls like that.

spinandscribble

dutch all the way. its nice to treat and be treated sometimes.

who007

The guy on the first date unless iot was the girl who asked him on the date, go dutch from then on except for one treating the other from time to time, but without keeping track of whose turn it is to do the treating..

scorpioishere

Split the cost. For me i always pay the first and the second time we meet she pays.

jellie

i will always expect to pay my own way. but if someone wants to treat me, why would i say no?

& viceversa, sometimes id wanna treat the boy.

now just gotta go find a boy.. :pac:

stovelid

If you feel men should always pay: fine. but you should always put out after the date.

TEDDYBEAR90

im happy to go dutch. I don't think either person should have to foot the entire bill.

Polleta

The invitor for the first date though I'm pretty sure if it was dinner for instance one of us paid for dinner and the other paid for post dinner drinks in all of my first dates.

After that in my relationships it has always been alternating. My ex gave up fighting with me over paying though always insisted on he had to pay for dinner but I could pay for lunch/breakfast or drinks.

Toots

When I started seeing my OH, I was still in school and he was working, so he insisted on paying for everything (probably cos he knew I had no money). Our usual dates in the early days were dinner and either the cinema or a game of pool, so I'd always buy the cinema tickets or pay for the pool table cos it was only about €10, and at least that way he wasn't paying for absolutely everything. Now all our accounts etc are joint so it's simply a matter of who wants the hassle of taking their wallet out of their pocket.

I think in general though, if you invite someone out for a date then you should pay. If it's a mutual arrangement to meet up, then probably going dutch is best.

Mr. Frost

twanda wrote: »

I am a girl and I also prefer to pay half of the bill. Always have done.
I think in this day and age we shouldn't be expecting the guy to foot the bill.

Why not? What's wrong with chivalrous values like that? This 'this day and age' stuff? What does it even mean? It's hardly on par with expecting the man to work and the woman to stay at home. I think it's nice for the guy to pay, I think if the woman wants to go halves fine. If she invites me out, I pay, I just like to. I wish some women would stop coming across as insulted by such a gesture.

Jules

Depends on the situation, a guys asks me out and i expect him to pay but all going well at the end of whatever i would say, wanna do it again sometime, but its on me. Or if i sak him out first i pay, Or something to that degree. Now in a relationship we kinda split it, but if we are having a date night kinda deal or im cooking something special he'll pay or i'll pay depending on who came up with the idea!

taram

Last year when my boyfriend was only working weekends and I was working full time I'd usually pay for things like dinner out, he'd pay for small things like coffees and such. Now we're on the same hours we have free dates (picnic and walk ).

rediguana

I think the man should pay unless the woman is rich and he is poor, and that sounds like an unlikely date pairing.

Students etc can split the cost.

roberta c

Why?

AnnieB82

I think if a guy asks a girl out he should pay for the first date ( yeah old fashioned) Afterwards it should be 50/50