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On a date, who do you think should pay?

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    #32
    ntlbell
    Registered Users Posts: 16,288 ✭✭✭✭ntlbell


    I guess it depends what sort of a date it is etc. but i've always paid if i asked the person out

    but now when me and the missus go on a "date" it's never really brought up sometimes i'll pay sometimes she'll pay or sometimes it just goes on our joint account it's never something that we actually talk about it just sort of "happens"


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    #33
    Orlee
    Registered Users Posts: 1,274 ✭✭✭Orlee


    50 50 all the way :) Unless he insists on paying!


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    #34
    lickleMo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭lickleMo


    AnnieB82 wrote: »
    I think if a guy asks a girl out he should pay for the first date ( yeah old fashioned) Afterwards it should be 50/50

    i agree....this is the way it should be!! on a first date if they pay for at least dinner and then maybe I'd buy drinks or something. but after that its only fair that i pull my way. i once went out with a guy on a first date and we split the bill. fine....then we went for drinks and we stood around like idiots for ages till eventually i had to ask him what he was drinking. could see the scabbiness a mile off and that's just not a nice quality in someone.


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    #35
    Jellybabs
    Registered Users Posts: 26 ✭Jellybabs


    lickleMo wrote: »
    i agree....this is the way it should be!! on a first date if they pay for at least dinner and then maybe I'd buy drinks or something. but after that its only fair that i pull my way. i once went out with a guy on a first date and we split the bill. fine....then we went for drinks and we stood around like idiots for ages till eventually i had to ask him what he was drinking. could see the scabbiness a mile off and that's just not a nice quality in someone.
    i agree i hate scabiness in men.. went to the cinema with a guy recently and i ended up payin. i do go halves but is so nice when they offer to pay hehe :P


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    #36
    lickleMo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭lickleMo


    Jellybabs wrote: »
    i agree i hate scabiness in men.. went to the cinema with a guy recently and i ended up payin. i do go halves but is so nice when they offer to pay hehe :P

    I bet he was a keeper!! I wouldn't be bothered about a guy that deliberatley did that on a first date. I once was seeing a guy and we'd met up a few times. We were going out for dinner and he forgot his wallet...I didn't mind that...but then he went and ordered the most expensive thing on the menu. I personally would be mortified to do that. If it was me, even if it was my best friend I wouldn't do that....let alone someone I had only known a short while. I just felt like he was taking the piss....
    I also know a guy who had got free tickets to the cinema from work....brought a girl along and he told her to go and buy the popcorn and sweets as he was going to buy the tickets....unbelievable!!! God help any girl that ends up with him cause he really is the most miserably scabby guy I have ever come across in my life!!
    Men can never say we take the piss out of them cause I really think that sometimes they do it to us!


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    #37
    Jellybabs
    Registered Users Posts: 26 ✭Jellybabs


    lickleMo wrote: »
    I bet he was a keeper!! I wouldn't be bothered about a guy that deliberatley did that on a first date. I once was seeing a guy and we'd met up a few times. We were going out for dinner and he forgot his wallet...I didn't mind that...but then he went and ordered the most expensive thing on the menu. I personally would be mortified to do that. If it was me, even if it was my best friend I wouldn't do that....let alone someone I had only known a short while. I just felt like he was taking the piss....
    I also know a guy who had got free tickets to the cinema from work....brought a girl along and he told her to go and buy the popcorn and sweets as he was going to buy the tickets....unbelievable!!! God help any girl that ends up with him cause he really is the most miserably scabby guy I have ever come across in my life!!
    Men can never say we take the piss out of them cause I really think that sometimes they do it to us!
    haha no he wasnt a keeper and then he left d cinema and went 2 boots 2 buy d drinks and d sweets i was like hang my head in shame i suppose i get embaressed easy but defo there wasnt gonna be a date no.2 and tat guy that got the free tickets and got her 2 pay shud be stayed well away from haha :D
    im not sayin men should pay all the time but its so sweet wen they do and you always want to pay your way then well i do anyway haha :)


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    #38
    lickleMo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭lickleMo


    Jellybabs wrote: »
    haha no he wasnt a keeper and then he left d cinema and went 2 boots 2 buy d drinks and d sweets i was like hang my head in shame i suppose i get embaressed easy but defo there wasnt gonna be a date no.2 and tat guy that got the free tickets and got her 2 pay shud be stayed well away from haha :D
    im not sayin men should pay all the time but its so sweet wen they do and you always want to pay your way then well i do anyway haha :)

    Oh my!! scabby alert....scabby alert!! :eek: sounds like something that guy with the free tickets would do! i wonder was it the same guy...haha!! :D you had absolutely nothing to be embarressed about....the guy clearly had no shame!! girl power and all that....but as you say it is sweet when they do offer...and when I know someone isn't taking the piss and I really like them I want to treat that person. that's just what i think anyway!!


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    #39
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    easy really if i asked a girl out for a drink id pay even if im just a mate if she invites me out il still probably pay because or insist on at least spliting...

    mind you my x braught me out for a meal / kfc heh she payed i was broke :D....

    i baught the ice cream....


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    #40
    Jellybabs
    Registered Users Posts: 26 ✭Jellybabs


    lickleMo wrote: »
    Oh my!! scabby alert....scabby alert!! :eek: sounds like something that guy with the free tickets would do! i wonder was it the same guy...haha!! :D you had absolutely nothing to be embarressed about....the guy clearly had no shame!! girl power and all that....but as you say it is sweet when they do offer...and when I know someone isn't taking the piss and I really like them I want to treat that person. that's just what i think anyway!!
    ya i guess ! yep i agree if u like dem and their genuine of course then your gonna want to treat them back.. i may be a little old fashioned in thinkin d guy shud defo offer 2 pay on d first date tho haha i remember of mate of mine sayin one day i was ruininG feminism one day wen i said that i dunno about that tho !! :P guess will just have 2 choose nicer guys the next time :D although i dunno is there many genuinely nice guys around anymore !! :O


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    #41
    Kenno90
    Registered Users Posts: 3,184 ✭✭✭Kenno90


    lets face it , in these hard recession times , both sohuld spilt the cost ,

    well seriously i think if the guy asks a girl then he should pay in full ,
    if they become BF/GF then it should be spilt down the middle


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    #42
    Jellybabs
    Registered Users Posts: 26 ✭Jellybabs


    Snow-Monkey wrote: »
    easy really if i asked a girl out for a drink id pay even if im just a mate if she invites me out il still probably pay because or insist on at least spliting...

    mind you my x braught me out for a meal / kfc heh she payed i was broke :D....

    i baught the ice cream....
    thats different when your going out with someone thats grand !! and at least you paid 4 d dessert dat was nice esp when u were broke :D


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    #43
    Jellybabs
    Registered Users Posts: 26 ✭Jellybabs


    Kenno90 wrote: »
    lets face it , in these hard recession times , both sohuld spilt the cost ,

    well seriously i think if the guy asks a girl then he should pay in full ,
    if they become BF/GF then it should be spilt down the middle
    tat sounds fair as u say esp in dese recession times haha :D


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    #44
    lickleMo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭lickleMo


    Snow-Monkey wrote: »
    easy really if i asked a girl out for a drink id pay even if im just a mate if she invites me out il still probably pay because or insist on at least spliting...

    mind you my x braught me out for a meal / kfc heh she payed i was broke :D....

    i baught the ice cream....

    I don't ever expect friends to pay for me. but of course that sometimes happens and the other person might buy drinks the next time. i think it all boils down to if people are being fair and not deliberatley avoiding paying their way...I know there are times that we don't have a lot of money (I'm a student again and really very broke!!) but i still always make sure someone doesn't think im taking advantage of them. i dont mind but when its a regular occurance that someone has no money and you're constantly having to pay the way for both well then i think get rid....and that goes for the guys too!!


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    #45
    lickleMo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭lickleMo


    Jellybabs wrote: »
    :P guess will just have 2 choose nicer guys the next time :D although i dunno is there many genuinely nice guys around anymore !! :O

    Putting the "split the bill" thing to the side...i do agree that its really hard to meet nice genuine guys....maybe that's a topic for a different thread!!


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    #46
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    lickleMo wrote: »
    I don't ever expect friends to pay for me. but of course that sometimes happens and the other person might buy drinks the next time. i think it all boils down to if people are being fair and not deliberatley avoiding paying their way...I know there are times that we don't have a lot of money (I'm a student again and really very broke!!) but i still always make sure someone doesn't think im taking advantage of them. i dont mind but when its a regular occurance that someone has no money and you're constantly having to pay the way for both well then i think get rid....and that goes for the guys too!!


    why are you justfying that to me all i said was id happilly buy them a few drinks :confused: and proabably split a bill if they invited me out and if i invited them out id buy there drinks... and food... :confused:


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    #47
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    Jellybabs wrote: »
    thats different when your going out with someone thats grand !! and at least you paid 4 d dessert dat was nice esp when u were broke :D

    shes my x and she new she was paying :cool: she wasa troubelsome gf so its time for her to reach into them pockets :P


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    #48
    lickleMo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭lickleMo


    Snow-Monkey wrote: »
    why are you justfying that to me all i said was id happilly buy them a few drinks :confused: and proabably split a bill if they invited me out and if i invited them out id buy there drinks... and food... :confused:

    I don't think I was trying to justify myself...I was just responding and adding more to the responses...:) I'm new to all this!

    But i think that's nice what you do :) its nice to be nice!!


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    #49
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    lickleMo wrote: »
    I'm don't think I was trying to justify myself...I was just responding and adding more to the responses...:) I'm new to all this!

    But i think that's nice what you do :) its nice to be nice!!


    sorry you just came across to me as thos you where :o..


    It is indeed :)


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    #50
    TerrorFirmer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    When I was first dating my girlfriend, I paid for a lot of things, but only because I wanted to - she certainly didn't expect me to, but I insisted. There's a crucial difference there between 'think' and allow. If a girl yields to being bought stuff that's fine, if she actually expects to be bought stuff....in my opinion that's a warning sign for any man. Nowadays, we go even on things, give or take a small bit - some days I'll buy stuff, other days, she'll buy stuff, naturally some days will be more expensive then others. It's not an exact science.


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    #51
    Alessandra
    Registered Users Posts: 1,276 ✭✭✭Alessandra


    On dates I always make an attempt to pay my way. If I was with a fellow student definitely go halfs. I've been taken out by professionals when I was a student who insisted on paying and I didn't mind. Now I am working I never expect a free meal but sometimes it happens that way. If I suggest the evening I'll pay.. Depends on the situation!


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    #52
    muboop1
    Registered Users Posts: 1,025 ✭✭✭muboop1


    I'd always pay, or at least offer to anyway.
    Having said that, i despise being expected to pay.

    If you are one of those girls who assume i would pay, ill do it but thats likely the end of it right there!

    Just because its quite cheeky!

    I'm the same when it comes to doing things for girls, il do it happily if asked, but if there is more behind the asking... its a no no.

    I still pay for most stuff with my gf i think... its kinda hard to know, we pay for eachothers whatever!
    Actually, we are prob equal... actually i don't care!
    We pay for eachother, and we are happy that way!


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    #53
    Black Swan
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,241 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    If we really fancy each other, where we go out is not all that important, just that we are doing it together. And in the last case, I like to show my mutual interest and take turns picking up the tab.


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    #54
    Brien
    Registered Users Posts: 233 ✭✭Brien


    It bugs me when i invite a woman out and she does make a massive point on paying half, but it also bugs me when Im out and a randomer you talk to expects people to buy them drinks and thee like. common sense needs to be applied


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    #55
    MissIT
    Registered Users Posts: 219 ✭✭MissIT


    If a guy buys me a drink i buy him one back later on. If a guy wont let me pay my half in the cinema i buy the sweets or food afterwards. I hate other people spending their money on me but i think it's rude to protest too much.


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    #56
    CDfm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,649 ✭✭✭✭CDfm


    Blue_Lagoon wrote: »
    If we really fancy each other, where we go out is not all that important, just that we are doing it together. And in the last case, I like to show my mutual interest and take turns picking up the tab.

    Very well put. My g/f does that and we go out to eat a bit and its great.

    It means you know the person you are with appreciates and values you.


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    #57
    Húrin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,045 ✭✭✭Húrin


    whoever is richer should pay.


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    #58
    idontknowmyname
    Closed Accounts Posts: 818 ✭✭✭idontknowmyname


    Always been one for splitting the cost


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