Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Dirty rotten scoundrel

2»

Comments

  • #52
    username123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    OP - 3 things strike me about your posts.

    1: You seem to have a problem engaging emotionally, you say you THINK you love your wife? Love is not something that people usually have to think too hard about, you either love her or you dont - why would you have married her at all if you didnt have some feelings of love for her?

    2: You seem to have a complete lack of empathy for how someone else feels. You state that if your wife was doing what you do you would divorce her. End of. No mention of how much it would hurt you or how shattered it would make you feel. Just a clear statement that you would refuse to accept that behaviour. On an intellectual level you seem to understand that what you are doing is wrong, but you are failing to empathise with how your wife would feel if she knew about this - its as though you can understand her position, but not understand the emotion that would come with being in that position.

    3: You only seem worried about the situation for the effects it would have on YOU. Worried about YOUR karma - nothing about your wife.

    So, just leaving all judgements aside for a minute, it would appear to me that you cannot empathise with another humans feelings, nor can you engage properly emotionally yourself.

    Both of the above are enough for me to think that you need professional help. It is 'normal' for one human being to empathise with another, its also 'normal' for a human being to be in touch with their emotions enough to know if they love their spouse or not - failing to recognise love is quite a big issue. Failing to feel empathy is awful.

    Its possible that the part of your brain that registers emotion doesnt work like most other peoples. It would certainly explain your behaviour.

    Although your behaviour has addictive tendencies I suspect if you felt your own personal wellbeing was being threatened that you would be able to stop - its your lack of empathy that continues to drive you.

    Interestingly you have trust issues because of your own behaviour - which indicates that you think everyone else 'could' behave like you do, fuelling your own paranoia and probably contributing to your lack of empathy.

    Anyway just a few thoughts on the subject. I do not agree with your behaviour at all, but I find it virtually impossible to relate to you because my conscience would not allow me to behave the way you do and I dont have any ambiguity about my feelings of love for my partner.
    In fact - I cannot empathise with you because you are so different to me - is that why you have such problems with empathy for your wife?

    One way or the other - I do believe you need professional help to get to the bottom of this behaviour pattern.


Advertisement