The Brooding Corner

Queen-Mise · 02-04-2011 2:41am

Ok rant coming and more than a little hurt :mad:

I have been involved in a voluntary organisation for the past ten years and had a management 'type' meeting last night. On and off over the years they have been cliques. Last night I was utterly bullied out of the proceedings - there is an 'in' club now in the management. They are organising an event in September that last year lost money - the people who are in management are also the same people who are on the committee for this event.

I am really hurt over this - people who I have/had a lot of respect for behaved atrociously. I am out in the cold, its hard.

I'm very hurt. Not a happy bunny.

FewFew · 02-04-2011 4:00pm

Queen-Mise wrote: »

Ok rant coming and more than a little hurt :mad:

I have been involved in a voluntary organisation for the past ten years and had a management 'type' meeting last night. On and off over the years they have been cliques. Last night I was utterly bullied out of the proceedings - there is an 'in' club now in the management. They are organising an event in September that last year lost money - the people who are in management are also the same people who are on the committee for this event.

I am really hurt over this - people who I have/had a lot of respect for behaved atrociously. I am out in the cold, its hard.

I'm very hurt. Not a happy bunny.

Such things do hurt and all too often happen in voluntary organisations where things are done by committee and the ability to manipulate people gets you to the top. I've left similar things in the past because of the way they were run, but most organisations can't be picky when it comes to volunteers etc. There's no way to fire someone since they're not actually getting paid.
Might make you feel better to go back to grass roots and help do things directly.

squishykins · 03-04-2011 2:59pm

Angry, hurt and insulted atm...I was watching the late late with daddy on Friday, and there was a gay couple who'd gotten a civil partnership (I think, I wasn't paying much attention), and daddy started going on about how it's "wrong", and how they shouldn't be allowed to adopt because kids shouldn't be put near a "relationship like that." I always thought he was more open-minded and I always felt that if I ever had to tell him about me being bi, that he'd accept me. At least I found out now than later

spoonbadger · 04-04-2011 10:54pm

<?xml version="1.0"?>

<rant>
I hate my course, the amount of time i spend on it, the amount of time i still have to spend on it and any possible career i can get from it. Having spent the best part of this college year in isolation, on study and coursework all-nighters, in a fluorescent-lit dungeon, i'm still only barely scraping 40%, and when/if i do pass, i'm starting to think that i wont look back and think "wow, i'm so proud of all the work i've done!" as i'd originally hoped i would. At this point, i'm just keeping on keeping on to get a piece of paper that'll tell me i can do something different with my life.

Tomorrow i have to explain to probably one of the nicest of my lecturers that the reason my code doesn't work, even after two weeks of extensions, is i've had to spend my time on other, completely **** assignments, just to try pass the year. The worst part, is that i know i could get it fixed with another all-nighter, but after the last week (and the last 2 months in general) i just dont have the energy.

</rant>

Handsome Bob · 05-04-2011 7:45am

spoonbadger wrote: »

<?xml version="1.0"?>

<rant>
I hate my course, the amount of time i spend on it, the amount of time i still have to spend on it and any possible career i can get from it. Having spent the best part of this college year in isolation, on study and coursework all-nighters, in a fluorescent-lit dungeon, i'm still only barely scraping 40%, and when/if i do pass, i'm starting to think that i wont look back and think "wow, i'm so proud of all the work i've done!" as i'd originally hoped i would. At this point, i'm just keeping on keeping on to get a piece of paper that'll tell me i can do something different with my life.

All I can say to you spoons is that you're not the first one to become disillusioned with your course, and you sure won't be the last one either. There's no shame in saying "I made a mistake doing this course, so I'm going to have to go back to the drawing board." I dropped out of the original degree I signed up for and there are others who have had the misfortune of having to drop out twice.

So it can be a ridiculousy hard job trying to figure out what exactly it is that we want to do, so don't be so hard on yourself.

I'm sure there will be some dicks lecturing you if you decide to drop out, but in my experience these are mostly people who either hate their job or who are just downright self centred morons.

Tomorrow i have to explain to probably one of the nicest of my lecturers that the reason my code doesn't work, even after two weeks of extensions, is i've had to spend my time on other, completely **** assignments, just to try pass the year. The worst part, is that i know i could get it fixed with another all-nighter, but after the last week (and the last 2 months in general) i just dont have the energy.

</rant>

I'm a big believer of the idea that we know our own mind. I'm sure a lot of people are going to tell you to tough it out, but deep down we know when we're fighting a losing battle.

What I would say to you though is that before you make a decision, give your next move some real thought and map out the next steps. The worst thing one can do in this situation is drop out with no plan.

FewFew · 05-04-2011 11:37am

LZ speaks ze truth. I too dropped out of quite a good career-minded course, and I'm glad I did because I wouldn't have enjoyed working in that career. Sure, you may get people calling you Van Wilder... as they did with me, but, sure, that guy was excellent.

ToniTuddle · 05-04-2011 6:59pm

squishykins wrote: »

Angry, hurt and insulted atm...I was watching the late late with daddy on Friday, and there was a gay couple who'd gotten a civil partnership (I think, I wasn't paying much attention), and daddy started going on about how it's "wrong", and how they shouldn't be allowed to adopt because kids shouldn't be put near a "relationship like that." I always thought he was more open-minded and I always felt that if I ever had to tell him about me being bi, that he'd accept me. At least I found out now than later

It's difficult to understand but our parents come from a completely different generation. How are they suppose to know any different?
It's hard for them to comprehend certain things that they haven't a clue about all we can do is try to explain things to them. They may never be fully ok with it but they may begin to at least understand it or accept it.

Did you try bringing the subject up in general and talking calmly or even saying to him...Jezzz dad thought ye would be more open minded than that. Just to see his reaction?

To Spoony!
I've dropped out of two very different courses and only now realise what I want to really do with my life. Gonna give it a go anyway but it's ok to be unsure about what you are doing.

If you aint gonna love the job at the end of this degree then why are you doing it? I could have stuck out another 2 years to get my degree but didn't see the point as knew I would hate whatever job it would bring.

My mate is currently repeating his first year of college all over again and realises he doesn't want a career in it. Some would say he wasted 2 years but....well it's not wasted as such he's made awesome friends and had great experiences. Plus least this has shown him he is doing the wrong thing and is pushing him to do something different for September.

How many more years have you left? Could you defer for a year to give yourself a break and figure out what you really want? As long as you are deferred it should be easy to swap over to a different course if you find you do want to do something else

boomkatalog · 06-04-2011 11:54am

Got a call this morning offering me a job interview for the disney store in Dublin. I really wanted it, and I can't go because I have too much fcuking college work to do. I'm so annoyed I feel like telling everyone to fcuk off and leave me cry tears of rage in peace!

reallyrose · 06-04-2011 11:56am

boomkatalog wrote: »

Got a call this morning offering me a job interview for the disney store in Dublin. I really wanted it, and I can't go because I have too much fcuking college work to do. I'm so annoyed I feel like telling everyone to fcuk off and leave me cry tears of rage in peace!

Want me to go impersonate you?

*quietly fcuks off*

boomkatalog · 06-04-2011 12:29pm

reallyrose wrote: »

Want me to go impersonate you?

*quietly fcuks off*

You wouldn't be able to feign stupidity like mine

reallyrose · 06-04-2011 12:31pm

You're talking to someone who managed to fall over and land on a concrete block 4 foot away.
Also, you're not stupid.

AND I have an ass-load of pain meds, I could fake being Barack Obama right now.

boomkatalog · 06-04-2011 12:33pm

reallyrose wrote: »

You're talking to someone who managed to fall over and land on a concrete block 4 foot away.
Also, you're not stupid.

AND I have an ass-load of pain meds, I could fake being Barack Obama right now.

I was right to turn it down right?

I mean, I had a lift up tonight, bus home tomorrow, drive to the bloody thing... But then if they'd called me back in a week I couldn't go. And I'd have lost a whole day of work when I don't have whole days to spare.

I really want a freakin job up there though

reallyrose · 06-04-2011 12:43pm

Aw, you'll get one. Even if I have to kill someone so you can have their job.

FewFew · 06-04-2011 1:01pm

Awww, but you'd be great in the world of disney, what with your annoying ways and being the same youthful age as their target demographic.

Still, there'll be other jobs.

boomkatalog · 06-04-2011 1:22pm

It's a wonder I got any freakin interview, I would've been awesome in the disney store.

AND THE EMPLOYEE DISCOOOUUUUUNT!

:(:(

*wails*

reallyrose · 06-04-2011 1:26pm

Don't crrrrrrrrrrrrry....

Here's a hedgehog with a tube on his head...

5225206415_3ab5766518_b-copy.jpg?w=539&h=636

FewFew · 06-04-2011 3:51pm

Is that an albino hedgehog? Or young? Either way it's the Boomkat of the hedgehog world.

Maguined · 06-04-2011 5:01pm

Fewcifur wrote: »

Is that an albino hedgehog? Or young? Either way it's the Boomkat of the hedgehog world.

Does that mean boom is also prickly and frequently has toiletries stuck to her hair?

squishykins · 06-04-2011 5:07pm

ToniTuddle wrote: »

It's difficult to understand but our parents come from a completely different generation. How are they suppose to know any different?
It's hard for them to comprehend certain things that they haven't a clue about all we can do is try to explain things to them. They may never be fully ok with it but they may begin to at least understand it or accept it.

Did you try bringing the subject up in general and talking calmly or even saying to him...Jezzz dad thought ye would be more open minded than that. Just to see his reaction?

I don't really use that excuse for my parents, as my dad's 38 and my mum's 37. That's still young, and in general they're both very liberal, maybe my mum moreso but still. I never once heard him having a problem with gays before, so it just took me by complete surprise. Also, you don't talk to my dad. He's scary, and never listens to anyone else's opinions.

boomkatalog · 06-04-2011 5:13pm

Maguined wrote: »

Does that mean boom is also prickly and frequently has toiletries stuck to her hair?

YOU FOUND THE PICTURES?? :eek:

@squish I know what you mean

A family I know, the guy who's 20 came out to me a couple weeks ago as gay (it was never exactly a shock though

) and apparently his sister is also seeing a girl atm, so she's either a lesbian or bi. And their father has made a point of telling his flamboyant son how much he hates "queers" and "puffs". It's almost like he's threatening him not to come out, as he was blatantly going to some day. Its sad really, coming out as gay or bi doesn't make you a different person to the day before you come out, but I guess it really is that old-school view of the world, and yano, the old Catholic thing about how being gay is a sin or whatever.

reallyrose · 06-04-2011 5:15pm

Fewcifur wrote: »

Is that an albino hedgehog? Or young? Either way it's the Boomkat of the hedgehog world.

Maguined wrote: »

Does that mean boom is also prickly and frequently has toiletries stuck to her hair?

Or that she is super-adorable and you just want to feed her grapes!

Nerin · 06-04-2011 5:16pm

squishykins wrote: »

I don't really use that excuse for my parents, as my dad's 38 and my mum's 37. That's still young, and in general they're both very liberal, maybe my mum moreso but still. I never once heard him having a problem with gays before, so it just took me by complete surprise. Also, you don't talk to my dad. He's scary, and never listens to anyone else's opinions.

his opinion might change if its closer to home though. my stepdad is very like that but got real drunk when I was a teenager and told me he would still love me if I was gay. then asked if I was. because he thought alt teen Nerin was weird therefore gay.

Irish people are odd til things hit home. squishy hugs though, it sucks you're sad and he said that.

ToniTuddle · 06-04-2011 5:30pm

squishykins wrote: »

I don't really use that excuse for my parents, as my dad's 38 and my mum's 37. That's still young, and in general they're both very liberal, maybe my mum moreso but still. I never once heard him having a problem with gays before, so it just took me by complete surprise. Also, you don't talk to my dad. He's scary, and never listens to anyone else's opinions.

Oh! See my Mum is like 65...big difference there so!

But it still kinda stands depending how they were raised by your grandparents and how all their friends were raised and what interactions they had with the issue in the past. Or did they happen to grow up in a small town? cause we all know what small town mentality is like :-/

It's obviously hurtful to think your Dad possibly wouldn't be supportive of you. But you are still young and you don't have to tell him anything anytime soon so try not to let it weigh too heavy on your thoughts.

EDIT: Also second what Nerin said!!

Handsome Bob · 06-04-2011 5:42pm

Nerin wrote: »

his opinion might change if its closer to home though. my stepdad is very like that but got real drunk when I was a teenager and told me he would still love me if I was gay. then asked if I was. because he thought alt teen Nerin was weird therefore gay.

Irish people are odd til things hit home. squishy hugs though, it sucks you're sad and he said that.

Sorry mate but I chuckled at this, it's amazing how one track minded some people can be.