Genie

Stevecw

3 guys are walking along a beach in America, a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy. They stumble across a genie bottle and not being able to decide who should have the 3 wishes, the genie gives them one each.

The genie asks the black guy first, "What is your wish?", and the black guy replies, "I wish all my fellow african americans to be back in africa to live in peace". Genie bows, poof, and the black guys wish is granted.

The genie asks the hispanic guy, "And what is your wish?". The hispanic guy replies, "I wish all my fellow hispanic people to be back in their homeland and living in peace". Genie bows, poof, and the hispanic guys wish is also granted.

The genie finally turns to the white guy and asks him the same question. "So, what do you wish for?". The white guy thinks for a moment, then replies, "So you mean to tell me that all the black people in America are in Africa, and all the hispanic's are back in their homelands?". The genie says to him "Well, yes!", so the white guy says, "In that case, i'll just have a Coke then

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Spotted in a toilet of a London office:
TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW.

In a London Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT

Outside a London second-hand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

Spotted in a safari park:
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR

Seen during a London conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR

Notice in a field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES

On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR, THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)


People in other countries sometimes go out of their way to communicate with their English-speaking tourists. Here is a list of signs seen around the world :

At a Budapest zoo:
PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY.

Doctors office, Rome :
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Hotel, Acapulco :
THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED HERE.

In a Nairobi restaurant:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE SHOULD WAIT AND SEE THE MANAGER.

In a City restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.

In a Calcutta Coffee House:
PEOPLE DISCARDING CIGARETTE STUBS IN CUPS WILL BE SERVED COFFEE IN ASH TRAYS