Guilt over homeless girl

biko

dorothygale wrote: »

Did I do the right thing by doing nothing or should I have offered her my couch?

You could have given her some money for drugs hot tea and a sandwich.

Mr.David

Mr. Incognito wrote: »

If everyone was in the habit of getting a breakfast roll and handing it to a homeless person every day, well, somthing o simple could make a huge difference.

Ya it could raise their cholestrol and increase their chances of getting heart disease. Wonderful out of the box thinking Incognito

the bolt

dave98 wrote: »

ye boards does need a better smiley.lol. Anyways myself and a friend had this discussion the last time in Dublin. There was a homeless man outside a fast food place begging. My friend wanted to give money, I was doubtful as I thought he looked like he was on drugs. My friend felt guilty as she thought he might be hungry. So we met half way. She bought him a coffee and a large big mac meal. When she offered it to him, he threw it on the ground and said its money he wanted. So maybe some homeless people dont want help....

But I do feel sorry for the homeless - wish there was a hostel we could donate money to and in return they give free beds for the night. I think this would be safer.

you could always make a donation to the simon community who do good work in this field.

Capt'n Midnight

Mr. Incognito wrote: »

If everyone was in the habit of getting a breakfast roll and handing it to a homeless person every day, well, somthing o simple could make a huge difference.

especially to centra

Professey Chin

Mr. Incognito wrote: »

If everyone was in the habit of getting a breakfast roll and handing it to a homeless person every day, well, somthing o simple could make a huge difference.

Greasy homeless?

RATM

siobhan.murphy wrote: »

well Dorothy,if she seemed ok u could have asked her if she would like u to get her a coffee or soup in a nearby shop,but u dont know these people so I can really answer,try not to worry about it,I was in Dublin one time and in a very pissed off mood saw a guy near the westbury begging and smoking,,i sais well if u can afford to smoke u shouldnt be begging,I thought it was funny but looking back I wouldnt like to be in that suitation

I remember doing some research for a paper on homelessness in Ireland in uni a few years back. A shocking 72% of homeless people were found to be smokers ( compared to about 27% nationally ). Take from that what you like but the way I saw it was that they have a hard enough life and a cigarette is one of their few little pleasures to what must be a hellish existence.

me-skywalker

easyeason3 wrote: »

I'd feel very sad if I offered someone a place to stay, with no strings attached, out of good will & if they declined because they felt uncomfortable.

no strings? damn i love them strings... for holding them tight against the bed!

EdgarAllenPoo

Just throwing this idea out there but if you give a homeless person food instead of money what are the chances of this happening - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vBUbJhFmTPc

boards.

I always check out the footwear on homeless people. It is a good sign of if they are really homeless or just those wanker beggers, before I give them a few euro.

Dyr

Which is why most junkies cover their legs in blankets, when they're tapping :eek:

Professey Chin

boards. wrote: »

I always check out the footwear on homeless people. It is a good sign of if they are really homeless or just those wanker beggers, before I give them a few euro.

Me too but I lick their toes aswell

dorothygale

snubbleste wrote: »

OP, can i ask you if that had been a young homeless man you witnessed, would you have had the same concern?

Yes, of course. It's only people like Ass who think it's something sexual. Just because he thinks that way, he thinks the rest of us do as well.

browner85

look at Doloris on fair city she has loads a homeless livin with her and its all cool... lol

luckat

Lads, before you post the smart remarks, remember that this could be your kid. And don't say "Wouldn't happen to me" - it's happened to people who are wonderful parents. Kids sometimes take a wrong turn and need help to come back.

I hope the little girl is ok. And yes, I'd be the same; I saw a little one sleeping in Bewley's doorway in Westmoreland Street one day and tucked a few quid in her pocket. She was totally out of it. If she wasn't dipped in her sleep, she'd have something to buy herself breakfast at least.

Thanks so much for the Leanbh helpline, Lilly - number saved to my mobile phone.

LouOB

Lillylilly wrote: »

OP, I work in a service in Dublin city centre for homeless teens. We provide a hostel service- for free!

If you have concerns about the welfare of a homeless young person, you should phone the local Garda, who will then contact the Duty/ Out of Hours Social Workers (depending on whether it's day or night). These Social Workers then have the responsibility to place these young people in suitable accommodation, whether it be a hostel, residential or back with their families.

Next time you see a young person begging, you should phone Leanbh, which is a service run by the ISPCC 24/7 to prevent child begging, and aims to link them in with other services. The number is 01- 2342009. Also, if a child is actually homeless (as opposed to having just left home after a row or whatever) they will have a social worker, and will be recieving a homeless payment. This can be up to €60 for under eighteens.

There are a lot of services out there to provide for these people and is you are concerned and willing, you should give donations, as opposed to giving them money directly to a person on the street. It is always much appreciated!!
Prevention is better than cure, so try to link in with a voluntary organisation so that they can provide a better service

Sorry for the long post, hope it clears some stuff up!!

L.

Thank you soo much for posting this

Like the OP I too want to bring the occasional homeless person back to the house for a good wash and hang sandwich
But common sense kicks in, usually a less measured amount than guilt

Least I can call this number now
Would love to help out every homeless person also
But its up to the individual as well to get help

Thank you again
- nomination post of the year for lillylilly

MadgeBadge

snubbleste wrote: »

OP, can i ask you if that had been a young homeless man you witnessed, would you have had the same concern?

I think maybe a young girl on the streets is perhaps a little more vulnerable.

Are people so intimidated by acts of kindness that they need to knock it? Think of it this way, she's doing a good thing so others don't have to. Go OP!

dorothygale

I went back and she wasn't there... I can only hope she found some place warm.

Yes, there are scumbags out there, **** pretending to be homeless etc. Yes, there are homeless drug addicted opportunists who will only seek to take advantage of you and will only wreck your own life if you try to help them.

However, there are people out there who are victims of abuse, runaways, the mentally ill, people who genuinely need help and would benefit by it. I won't stop believing that.I don't think anyone chooses to live rough on the streets.

I should have had more faith in my ability to judge character. I should have gone up to her and chatted with her for a moment to ascertain what kinda of person she was. I can't afford to pay for hostels every night but I can give a lend of a couch and provide a safe place for someone to get back on their feet, in the end that's what they really need.

If I am worse off for it I don't want to live in a world where we can't help each other and we live in fear of one another because that's not a world worth living in.

When I left home at 16 under fate twisted just a few degrees I could have been in their place and I'd want someone to help me.

Next time I'll offer my couch.

dorothygale

Just saw this great advice now.

Lillylilly wrote: »

OP, I work in a service in Dublin city centre for homeless teens. We provide a hostel service- for free!

If you have concerns about the welfare of a homeless young person, you should phone the local Garda, who will then contact the Duty/ Out of Hours Social Workers (depending on whether it's day or night). These Social Workers then have the responsibility to place these young people in suitable accommodation, whether it be a hostel, residential or back with their families.

Next time you see a young person begging, you should phone Leanbh, which is a service run by the ISPCC 24/7 to prevent child begging, and aims to link them in with other services. The number is 01- 2342009. Also, if a child is actually homeless (as opposed to having just left home after a row or whatever) they will have a social worker, and will be recieving a homeless payment. This can be up to €60 for under eighteens.

There are a lot of services out there to provide for these people and is you are concerned and willing, you should give donations, as opposed to giving them money directly to a person on the street. It is always much appreciated!!
Prevention is better than cure, so try to link in with a voluntary organisation so that they can provide a better service

Sorry for the long post, hope it clears some stuff up!!

L.

The_Minister

kickoutthejams wrote: »

Spoken like a true PD:D

You know I've got a point:)

You big drug enabler you;)

EdgarAllenPoo

boards. wrote: »

I always check out the footwear on homeless people. It is a good sign of if they are really homeless or just those wanker beggers, before I give them a few euro.

I do the same, I know it's a little bit of an odd thing to decide whether or not to give someone money based on how "poor" they look, you never know maybe they were thrown out by their parents and that's what they were wearing at the time. Doubt it though.

Neverwhere

dorothygale wrote: »

So tonight, a few minutes ago, I was in Dublin city center. As I got in a taxi, I noticed a young girl bedding down for the night in some blnkets outside a closed shop. It's cold outside tonight and as the taxi was leaving I thought to myself I should offer her my couch for the night.

I then did nothing. I starting fearing that if by doing so I could leave myself open to being robbed or at the very least she would think I was some sort of pervert or something and I would be embarrased. She could have been some sort of drug addict, but she could have also just been someone down on thier luck. I live alone, and I don't own very much worth stealing. Times are tough and we have to help one another.

I have always felt that the way to help people like this is to just help them, directly. To do what you can, even if that means taking a risk.

Did I do the right thing by doing nothing or should I have offered her my couch?

I personally find that very touching.

I was homeless for 9 months last year, it's really not a fun thing. And the worst is walking around in dirty clothes, looking a tired mess, carrying a bag of posessions and having everyone look at you like your scum and avoid you like the plague.

From living in homeless services, I can't say. Some of these people are really dodgy and you might not want them in your house, they'd take anything that wasnt nailed down.
On the upside, it never hurts to ask. The girl probably wouldnt have gone home with you anyway, but from experience, even just having someone stop and ask can make a persons month.

If you see anything like it again, the best bet is to buy the person some hot food....food is hard to come by when you have no money.

Neverwhere

GDM wrote: »

I do the same, I know it's a little bit of an odd thing to decide whether or not to give someone money based on how "poor" they look, you never know maybe they were thrown out by their parents and that's what they were wearing at the time. Doubt it though.

im sorry but checking out the footwear of homeless people is bull****. Just because a person is homeless doesnt mean they have to be wandering around in rags with wild hair talking to themselves.

****s sake!

I was seriously homeless for nine motnhs. I was at the end of my tether. I was put in thesituation because I have a crap social worker. I looked perfectly respectable a lot of the time...I have nice, cheap shoes. You dont need to completely let yourself go because you are homeless.
At the same time...I had no income for 6 months. My doctors were insisting I go on dissability allowance, but then there were delays with forms. I hardly ever ate and dropped to a really low weight...ultimately getting very ill. I used to troll Dun Laoghaire late night at weekends to see if any of the drunks had dropped a fiver.....a fiver meant food for 3 days. What a treat.

But if you had looked at my footwear? No, I wouldnt have looked homeless.

karen3212

RATM wrote: »

I remember doing some research for a paper on homelessness in Ireland in uni a few years back. A shocking 72% of homeless people were found to be smokers ( compared to about 27% nationally ). Take from that what you like but the way I saw it was that they have a hard enough life and a cigarette is one of their few little pleasures to what must be a hellish existence.

Interesting, I was reading a paper recently that stated that there is a high correlation between smoking and some mental illnesses - nicotine seems to afford some relief, hmm

Dark_lord_ire

its nice to know people still want to help. In fairness i have to say it would be a bad idea as she is probably an addict and would pee all over your sofa. Anyway what about the next night and the next night? these people are on welfare and would get rent allowance for a place noone has to be homeless they just dont want the hassle, bottle of wine, some gear and they are happy out.

Yesterday i came across a chap on pearse street he had a fit and fell over now i guess the pints he had before the fit did not help. He was not homeless but an alcoholic. He fell hard and hit his head only people that actually went to his aid was myself, an englishman and a nimibian girl. All other did not even slow down. Easy to think he is a druggy but he looked normal and noone cared. Sad state of dublin today

steo87

dave98 wrote: »

When she offered it to him, he threw it on the ground and said its money he wanted

I would have given him a square kick up the cúnt.....ungrateful bastard.

komodosp

I always check out the footwear on homeless people.

Sounds great in theory but if you are to judge the "good" homeless from the druggies, surely one of the first things you'd hope they buy with their donations is a pair of shoes!

To change the subject... (from footwear)
A friend of mine was walking through town one evening when she was asked for some money by an elderly homeless lady. The friend said that she hadn't even enough money for the bus home, and the homeless lady gave her a euro!

Hobbes

The_Minister wrote: »

Subsidising one area of their expenditure, would to my mind, also serve to subsidise the other areas of their expenditure.

So we should give homeless drugs so they spend more money on food! sorted! :pac:

adagio

Hey Op,

I think it's best to work within the confines of the existing homeless programmes for several reasons:

1) You gain experience in dealing with vulnerable people
2) You avoid the pitfalls of helping directly without experience
3) You will not leave yourself open to manipulation (physical or emotional)

I would suggest you try something like joining the Simon Community Soup Run, gain experience and take it from there.

I applaud you for showing a moral backbone and please ignore some of the morons who replied to your thread.

Cheers.

antodeco

One of they guys I know was homeless for 2 years, back in the late 90s. He wasnt a scummer, but had a difficult situation with has family. Anyway, he told me that he could get over €200 a week from begging and at Christmas could double that.