mens/womens job??

shezzie

Today in work out of the blue and for no reason a fellow collegue said women should not work in this job - i am a post office clerk i work on the counter doing billpayments investments passports etc - i thought he was joking and laughed but he said he was totally serious - he thinks we cant handle the more abusive customers and the threatening ones - be assured i/we can more than handle ourselves with professionalism, curtesy, and effectiveness and efficiency alot of positive characteristics my fellow male counterparts lack at times...

it may seem like a simple thing but when i realised he was absolutely very serious i found myself totally peeved - not like its hard labour not that us ladies cant do that either -

just wanted your opinion ladies....

Nevyn

He thinks that women can't be assertive enough when dealing with the public?
I would have told him if he has an issue with my professional behaviour or ability to preform my job he could have a chat with the manager and that I would be having
a similar chat myself about him.

Silverfish

I'd have just said 'I'm dealing with your abuse right now, amn't I?'


Just tell him women are more likely to be calm and rational whereas men flare up into tempers and start punching people.

He won't like that.

If he complains say "Oh I thought we were playing 'Who can talk the most amount of ****'"

ChewChew

I work for the HSE. I get soooo much abuse because i ''just work for the government'' but I'll tell ya one thing. . . my doctors do what their told. And my patients get treated with respect. I am the one that takes the crap when a doctor or nurse fúcks up. . . But I'm well able for it!

shezzie

i just didnt get him at all as i have worked in the job 10 years and have helped him out of hassle numerous times - but he let lose today in a big way totally shocked by his behaviour he is usually laid back

Ahh come now...he had to be pulling the pee.

shellyboo

shezzie wrote: »

Today in work out of the blue and for no reason a fellow collegue said women should not work in this job - i am a post office clerk i work on the counter doing billpayments investments passports etc - i thought he was joking and laughed but he said he was totally serious - he thinks we cant handle the more abusive customers and the threatening ones - be assured i/we can more than handle ourselves with professionalism, curtesy, and effectiveness and efficiency alot of positive characteristics my fellow male counterparts lack at times...

it may seem like a simple thing but when i realised he was absolutely very serious i found myself totally peeved - not like its hard labour not that us ladies cant do that either -

just wanted your opinion ladies....

What a knob.

I'd say he probably has some sort of issue with you actually being better at your job than he is... he can't find anything to find fault with, so he goes for the easy kill, ie, your gender.

I'd have taken a combination of Silverfish's and Thaed's approach... I'd have laughed it off to his face, but I'd be telling the manager about his blatant sexism.

Creamy Goodness

congradulations OP, you met an absolute dickhead there are plenty of them out there, both male and female (probably need a better name than dickhead for the female version).

shezzie

Moonbaby wrote: »

Ahh come now...he had to be pulling the pee.

wish he was moonbaby - he usually does have a laugh but this was full on rant - really laid in...not good...

sam34

ChewChew wrote: »

I am the one that takes the crap when a doctor or nurse fúcks up

in what way?

MJOR

:rolleyes:God almighty.... some people have a cheek.....

minidazzler

In fairness now, he works in a post-office. Not exactly wrestling a bear.

It probably makes him feel a little inadequet to think thst a woman can do the same job as him.

I am one who believes there are Manly jobs and jobs for Women.(It's not sexism, these would be jjobs that are simply more suited for a specific gender.) But a Post office is a Job for anyone.

Jesus Wept

I don't understand what he was talking about, it's not like he is a doctor or a pilot or so forth.

Nevyn

The-Rigger wrote: »

I don't understand what he was talking about, it's not like he is a doctor or a pilot or so forth.

Cos it would be understandible if he was going on about women being a doctor or a pilot ? I really can't say I agree with that.

It wasn't me!

It's a post office, not a building site. Were it a position which required physical strength, such as a site, where duties might include heavy lifting and physical exertion, then the selection of a strong male over a female is obvious and desirable, for the same reason that, all other things being equal, the strong male will likely, and should, get the job before a less strong male. It's about suitability for the role, which isn't gender-specific. In some cases it may be a factor, even a decisive factor, but that's not sexism; it's pragmatism.

Mr. Frost

shezzie wrote: »

Today in work out of the blue and for no reason a fellow collegue said women should not work in this job - i am a post office clerk i work on the counter doing billpayments investments passports etc - i thought he was joking and laughed but he said he was totally serious - he thinks we cant handle the more abusive customers and the threatening ones - be assured i/we can more than handle ourselves with professionalism, curtesy, and effectiveness and efficiency alot of positive characteristics my fellow male counterparts lack at times...

it may seem like a simple thing but when i realised he was absolutely very serious i found myself totally peeved - not like its hard labour not that us ladies cant do that either -

just wanted your opinion ladies....

C'mon women can't do 'hard labour'. I've seen them in action on many a Canadian building site and they're the ones who stand there with signs for road users, they're not complaining either. Why can't people accept that there are things men are better at and things women are better at. Everything doesn't have to be equal and it's not regardless of saying things to be PC about them. Sorry for the rant!

minidazzler

Thaedydal wrote: »

Cos it would be understandible if he was going on about women being a doctor or a pilot ? I really can't say I agree with that.

I think he mean that in Jest Thaedydal.


Also, from my experience most Post office workers are female. So he is working in a female dominated workplace if you think of it!!!

The Sweeper

Shezzie, are you saying that your coworker believes women can't deal with aggression and ranting and threatening customers, and his way of dealing with the women he doesn't believe can deal with people chucking a hissy fit, was to chuck a hissy fit?

Creamy Goodness

It wasn't me! wrote: »

It's a post office, not a building site. Were it a position which required physical strength, such as a site, where duties might include heavy lifting and physical exertion, then the selection of a strong male over a female is obvious and desirable.

still doesn't give him the right, if she was hired for the job then she's able to do it.

same would go for a female builder.

It wasn't me!

Creamy Goodness wrote: »

still doesn't give him the right, if she was hired for the job then she's able to do it.

same would go for a female builder.

Not necessarily. You're saying you've never worked with anyone who was incapable of doing their job as well as the other people concerned and created more work for everyone else because they weren't capable of doing their fair share? It's irrelevant in this case however, as there's nothing in her gender that would preclude her from being as efficient as a man in the same position, because it's a post office.

If a woman could do the same amount of heavy lifting as a man then they would be equally eligible for a position in which heavy lifting would be a dominant feature. If not, they should not be given it, as it would be detrimental to the efficiency of the endeavour.

shellyboo

It wasn't me! wrote: »

Not necessarily. You're saying you've never worked with anyone who was incapable of doing their job as well as the other people concerned and created more work for everyone else because they weren't capable of doing their fair share?

Of course this happens. If it does, you should not abuse your workmate over it though - you should take it to the manager.

And if and when you DO take it to a manager, the reason you give should not be "Mary is incapable of doing her job properly because she is a woman".

The reason may very well be "Mary is incapable of doing her job properly because she's not strong enough", but it shouldn't be about her gender. That's irrelevant.

It wasn't me!

shellyboo wrote: »

Of course this happens. If it does, you should not abuse your workmate over it though - you should take it to the manager.

Agreed, completely.

And if and when you DO take it to a manager, the reason you give should not be "Mary is incapable of doing her job properly because she is a woman".

Again, agreed, hence why I stated that gender is irrelevant; suitability for the role is what's important.

The reason may very well be "Mary is incapable of doing her job properly because she's not strong enough", but it shouldn't be about her gender. That's irrelevant.

And again, I've said that. However, there are positions which are dominated by particular genders, by virtue of the work they entail. Women, who on the whole are less strong than men, are less suitable than men for roles which involve physical strength, by the same virtue which gives greater suitability for the role to a strong man before a weaker one.

To reiterate, it's down to individual suitability for a role. Some roles can be adequately fulfilled by either gender as there is no reason for one to dominate the profession, such as the above post office job (honestly, the guy's just a sexist moron, and probably bitter at getting dumped or something equally stupid) and there are others, such as construction and manual labour, for which men are, by and large, more suitable, and as such, more likely to be hired, and the first woman who takes some retarded lawsuit because she was refused a job on a construction site which involved heavy lifting on the grounds that she was a woman and demands gender equality will have missed every possible point and rendered a century of suffrage a joke.

bob123456

The way things were.

Morag

Thats pretty sickening when you read it.

masonman

shezzie wrote: »

Today in work out of the blue and for no reason a fellow collegue said women should not work in this job - i am a post office clerk i work on the counter doing billpayments investments passports etc - i thought he was joking and laughed but he said he was totally serious - he thinks we cant handle the more abusive customers and the threatening ones - be assured i/we can more than handle ourselves with professionalism, curtesy, and effectiveness and efficiency alot of positive characteristics my fellow male counterparts lack at times...

it may seem like a simple thing but when i realised he was absolutely very serious i found myself totally peeved - not like its hard labour not that us ladies cant do that either -

just wanted your opinion ladies....

I wouldn't be too quick to put it all down to the whole men/women debate.

Perhaps it may have been a more personally directed comment hidden in a general insult.

Its an easy way to insult you/your colleagues but not directly, get it off his chest and get away with it ( moreso than a direct comment)

IMHO, forget the gander debate -its too easy. Maybe try to take an honest ( No REALLY honest) overview of yourself. You don't need to tell anyone and You won't lose face to him by being honest with yourself ( Thank god ) and it may help you in the long run.
Don't dwell on it. Rise above it and prove him wrong

shezzie

Minesajackdaniels wrote: »

Shezzie, are you saying that your coworker believes women can't deal with aggression and ranting and threatening customers, and his way of dealing with the women he doesn't believe can deal with people chucking a hissy fit, was to chuck a hissy fit?

it was a major hissy fit if you like - as i said i have gotten him out of a few hassles i am 10 years a clerk and well able for any situation in... a friendly curteous fashion - dont need to rise to the agressive behaviour - its just shocking ya know ....

i am a very confident clerk and very knowledgable - i can handle myself - he has the problem not me - but to speak the way he did totally out of line - dont know who he thought he was impressing there were no other male clerks around - he just keeps staring me out of it since then - dont know what thats about either - me thinks ill have to have a sit down chat dont what way to say it to him without him exploding bout it

The Sweeper

shezzie, first things first, write down what happened. Get it straight in your head - what he said, what you said, the time of day, the incidents leading up to the exchange. Write it down factually, don't put any emotion in it - so 'he appeared to be angry and persisted in maintaining eye contact' instead of 'he was really angry and he was trying to intimidate me'. Then at the end of your purely fatual account, write two paragraphs of precisely how it made you feel.

That exercise will help you get matters straight in your head.

Then examine the last while - you say you've had to dig him out of a few situations. To be honest, I can just picture it - public getting angsty, him getting angsty right back, you stepping in smoothly to calm things down - but here's the thing, do you reckon he's pissed off with you for intervening? See if he doesn't think there's anything wrong with how he's acting, and feels like you're undermining him, he could be translating your water-smoothing as something else - e.g. you don't understand he's in the right, and you step in inappropriately, QED you can't do your job?

Just trying to think from his viewpoint here, not saying anything against you whatsoever.

Anyway - think it through, write it down, then figure out what to do next - either approach him directly yourself, or escalate it to your manager.