Sexy dressing gf

LegacyUser

Im going out with my gf for a year now. I love her and she loves me.

Problem : She dresses too sexy.

She is 30 years old and looks fantastic, has an amazing body. Even if we go to the supermarket she will wear really short skirt and tight top.
Yesterday we went out for a walk and she was hanging out of the top she was wearing. As we walked along, every man woman and dog/cat would look at her boobs as we walked by.

Im not insecure, Im not a jealous person but I have heard other women say bad things about the way she dresses.

She is brazillian and very confident, and I love the way she is, but how do I tell her to tone it down a little bit without offending her.

And dont rip me to shreds, Im posting this as Im fed up with some of the bad comments she gets.

MissFlitworth

If she doesn't care about other women being jealous and bitchy then leave it be. All that should matter is that she's happy with how she dresses and looks. You may not want to be a jealous or insecure person but it sounds like you are a bit, and that's your issue and not hers. It doesn't make you a bad person or anything but the problem is yours to work on. It's not fair trying to change how someone dresses because it makes you uncomfortable

LegacyUser

thank you for the reply

I am not at all insecure and jealous.

I love her to bits, its just that shes goes a bit OTT sometimes, skirt short enough to see cheeks of ass etc. Thats nothing to do with insecurity on my part, I still want her to wear a short skirt, just not one where the world can see the mole on her ass cheek

3DataModem

If you really love each other, let her dress how she likes.

Stop pretending you are doing this to "protect" her from bad comments!

Lighten up. You'll be old and ugly soon enough.





PS If you choose not to take my advice and admit your unfounded jealousy to her, you are about 5 rows away from being single. Good luck!

LegacyUser

oh I forgot to add, she got a boob job a few months ago. Before the boob job she never wore tops like that. I suppose she just wants to flaunt what shes got.

I've stood up for her against my mother and sisters who constantly criticise her dress sense

StormWarrior

Does the way she dresses and the comments she gets embarrass you?

If she's wearing skirts short enough to see her arse cheeks, I wouldn't blame you for being embarrassed.

LegacyUser

ok ok

Im just fed up with how my mother and sisters constantly criticise her. I have not spoke to my mother in 2 months over this.

And we are no where near breaking up, actually getting married in the summer

Beruthiel

Unregistered wrote: »

Im posting this as Im fed up with some of the bad comments she gets.

Too bad.
If she is happy with the way she looks and dresses, you do not have the right to say anything to her.
You are not the boss of her.
She is her own person and if she is comfortable then leave her be.

This has ALL got to do with your attitude and judgments on this.

Im just fed up with how my mother and sisters constantly criticise her. I have not spoke to my mother in 2 months over this.

If they are 'constantly' doing this, then it is because you have allowed them to and forgot to tell them STFU and mind their own business.

cowzerp

MissFlitworth wrote: »

It's not fair trying to change how someone dresses because it makes you uncomfortable

I disagree, she should think of his feelings when dressing up, im far from a prude and love to see sexy women dressed well but if she's in park dressed like she is a street walker or a girl going dancing i'd find that a bit strange, there is plenty of sexy ways a girl can dress without having her boobs hanging out anyway..

LegacyUser

StormWarrior wrote: »

Does the way she dresses and the comments she gets embarrass you?

If she's wearing skirts short enough to see her arse cheeks, I wouldn't blame you for being embarrassed.

Thank you stormwarrior,
yes the comments sometimes do embarress me

StormWarrior

Perhaps he is also concerned for her safety, it is not advisable to dress like that sometimes.

LegacyUser

Beruthiel wrote: »

Too bad.
If she is happy with the way she looks and dresses, you do not have the right to say anything to her.
You are not the boss of her.
She is her own person and if she is comfortable then leave her be.

This has ALL got to do with your attitude and judgments on this.

Beruthiel, I expected better advice from you.

I never try to be the boss of her. Its nothing to do with my attitude, I have a healthy attititude to bodies, flesh and people feeling comfortable wearing what they like.

The reason I started this post, is that she genuinely dresses cheap and tacky (there, Ive said it).

A woman can still be sexy without boobs hanging out.

Oh The Humanity

Hmm OP, This IS a can of worms and no mistake.

I think on this one you are damned if you do and damned if you dont, I would be inclined to leave it really. I'd say she is just exited with her new boobs and wants to flaunt the hot bod, perhaps it will wear off when the novelty gets old.

I can understand your embarassment as going to the park on a grey, rainy and freezing April day in not much more than a bandage can come accross as a bit attention seeking and desperate.....but really what can you do...

Has she been in Ireland long, Im mystified at how she can brave the tempratures more than anything else!

LegacyUser

thanks, I think you are right, a can of worms indeed

She has been here for 2 years. Weather doesnt seem to phase her at all.

I nearly came to blows with my 2 uncles last weekend over comments they made about her

StormWarrior

OP, don't fall out with your mother over this. You only have to read that "my parents don't care about my health" thread to see how valuable one's family are. Maybe your mum is just worried about you or maybe she herself is embarrassed to have a potential daughter in law dress that way. Maybe you could bring the issue up with your girlfriend in this way: that you're worried about her safety when she dresses so sexily in public, and although she has a body worthy of being shown off, you don't want anything to happen to her, so please add a few extra inches to the skirts.
Another thing is, do you think she'll still be dressing like this when you're married with kids? If you're not too keen on her dress sense now, you may like it even less then.

lala stone

StormWarrior wrote: »

Perhaps he is also concerned for her safety, it is not advisable to dress like that sometimes.

How so???!

StormWarrior

Well obviously if she is walking alone in a mini skirt and with her boobs hanging out she could make it more likely that she be raped or anything.

lala stone

StormWarrior wrote: »

Well obviously if she is walking alone in a mini skirt and with her boobs hanging out she could make it more likely that she be raped or anything.

OMG?? R u for real?

nomorebadtown

"Oh no!! My incredibly hot brazilian girlfriend with an amazing body dresses in a way that allows the world to see her beauty and sexyness!!"

Sorry mate, i dont see you getting much sympathy.:p There are enough women (the majority of them) out there with body issues and seriously lacking in self confidence...please dont bring your (and you ma/sisters) issues down on her head. Stand up to your relations and ENJOY

cowzerp

lala stone wrote: »

OMG?? R u for real?

Even though this is not the op's issue it makes sense, when a girl who is sexy and has her ass on show walks by the natural thing to think of is sex, now if your the rape way inclined there is more chance she is going to hit the green light to go than a casually dresses person.

she wants to be viewed as a sexual object obviously so thats the way she will be viewed, by men and woman alike..

ps, she sounds hot!!

StormWarrior

It sounds like the girlfriend may be the one with the issues. She has had cosmetic surgery and goes out in public with clothes so skimpy that her arse cheeks are on display. She really sounds to me like she has self-esteem issues. You can dress sexily without showing off all of your wares to all and sundry. Would the other men here really not mind their girlfriend wearing such things? I would be very embarrassed if my boyfriend went out on public wearing only a thong and string vest.

And yes lala stone, drawing attention to oneself can make you a target for abuse of all kinds, as I should know from my silly teenage goth days!

LegacyUser

Beruthiel wrote: »

Too bad.
If she is happy with the way she looks and dresses, you do not have the right to say anything to her.
You are not the boss of her.
She is her own person and if she is comfortable then leave her be.

Had a feeling you would get a few comments like this.

Men are insensitive b*stards...its not the 40's anymore....your not the boss of her

Put the pc new age post feminist flags away this is about a relationship.

Personally I would talk to your GF about it. Just tell here you would appreciate it if she did not dress so revealingly as it makes you uncomfortable. Chances are she will understand and be fine with that. If she's not that is something you will have to live with.

You sound like a very lucky fella so like I said you should have a word and leave it at that. If your GF wishes to continue to dress the way she is dressing there is absolutely nothing you can do about it and you should leave it at that, respect her wishes and never speak of it again. But I would say definitely bring it up if its an issue for you.

Wagon

I can understand where you are coming from on the rape thing, but you have to remember that they are isolated incidents. Women can put themselves in situations where they are vulnerable to it. You're girlfriend probably has more sense than this so get that out of your mind. It'll do you no favors.

So I'd leave it be. She's grand, she can dress how she likes. Tell your family to **** off with themselves then next time they start having a go. If they don't respect you're partner you don't have to respect them.

Also, you posted on a message board that will have a load of feminists calling you a pig and a prick now because you got worried over something your girlfriend does. What you have to realise is that many people here are infallible and look down on you because you got bothered by something that involves your girlfriend.

I don't think you're jealous. I think you're just a little insecure about it. I can understand that because my girlfriend does things that annoy me sometimes but i let it go. Nobody is going to be 100% perfect for you. I'm sure you have irritating habits too but she just accepts it. Don't be afraid to stand up to your family either. and don't let it get the relationship down. It wouldn't be worth it.

Terodil

cowzerp wrote: »

Even though this is not the op's issue it makes sense, when a girl who is sexy and has her ass on show walks by the natural thing to think of is sex, now if your the rape way inclined there is more chance she is going to hit the green light to go than a casually dresses person.

she wants to be viewed as a sexual object obviously so thats the way she will be viewed, by men and woman alike..

That's so wrong I don't know where to start.

Next you'll be saying that if she does get raped, it's (partly) her fault too?

What's dressing in a sexy way got to do with wanting to be viewed as a sexual object?!

Christ...

@OP: You can ask her to dress down a bit because it makes you feel uncomfy. She may or may not wish to comply with your request. That's it.

star-pants

I can understand your concern OP - you don't like the fact she's barely covering herself, but you fell for who she is so you'll have to accept that.
You can say things like she looks gorgeous when she's wearing more (if you wish to boost her confidence in other clothing) or things like that.
You said she's gotten a boob job & has a new found lease of showing what's she's bought - that's not something you can change. She wants to show it off.

As for your family - you can just tell them that you love her for who she is, and that they shouldn't criticise her so much. That's about all you can do.

prinz

Beruthiel wrote: »

Too bad.
If she is happy with the way she looks and dresses, you do not have the right to say anything to her.

Unregistered wrote: »

Beruthiel, I expected better advice from you.

As did I. Apparently all the talk of communication being key goes out the window if it's a case of the male having an issue with the female in a relationship.

Talk to her. Tell her how you feel. Communicate. If she is unwilling to do anything then you have a vision into the future prior to the wedding, could be an invaluable insight. If she knows it is causing friction in your own family, and she still cannot get her head clear to dressing down around them just to keep things sweet for you, then she is clearly an attention seeker.

I have no problem with a girl dressing sexily/skimpily, but there's also a time and a place. Frankly I don't want to be bumping into Patricia the stripper when I go out for milk in the morning.

As someone said, it sounds to me like she also has issues with herself and a need for the attention and validation.

prinz

Terodil wrote: »

What's dressing in a sexy way got to do with wanting to be viewed as a sexual object?!

Pretty much everything.Same reason peacocks have colourful plumage.

TURRICAN

if your girlgriend is from a hot foreign country id say in in the blood to dress up with skimpy clothing.Well not in the blood but its just their dress habits.

pwd

Bad idea posting this here. You're getting hopped on for daring to admit you're irritated by every random letcher leering at your gf. Now you've gone and offended all the girl-power types, and of course all the random letchers.
I have a solution: Get a few ridiculous items of clothing, or grow your hair too long or something. Sooner or later your gf will suggest you wear something else/get a haircut - then *Bingo!* Precedent is set.

Terodil

prinz wrote: »

Pretty much everything.Same reason peacocks have colourful plumage.

What?

There's a distinct and important difference between a sexily-clad person and a sex object. :rolleyes:

mandysmithers

If I had a sister or a friend who wore a skirt short enough to show her ass cheek, I'd say something to them too. Some people obviously don't have mirrors in their houses.

If she carries on dressing like that, then that's her choice. You might just have to get used to it.

Wibbs

I'm going to have to disagree with this;

Beruthiel wrote: »

Too bad.
If she is happy with the way she looks and dresses, you do not have the right to say anything to her.

Actually he has the "right" to say what he likes to her and her to him. If he was dressing in a way she found inappropriate to her sensibilities she would equally have the same "right". They would both have the right to bring anything that may harm the relationship. This stuff is not as black and white as people too often make out. If he or anyone in a relationship finds something that their partner does to be uncomfortable, then they have a duty to themselves and the relationship to bring it up and hopefully find some understanding and compromise.

You are not the boss of her.

He never said he was. He said he found this level of public body exposure difficult to deal with. Bit of a diff there.

She is her own person and if she is comfortable then leave her be.

Great in theory, but society and individuals have limits and those limits vary from person to person and society to society. If she decided to walk around in a bikini and sarong in the park, should this also be comfortable for him too? Would he still have to suck it up as she is her own person? That goes for him too. If he wandered around the same park in a pair of speedos and an open shirt, I would expect her equally to raise an eyebrow and a conversation about it. Now many may say that's an exaggeration and pretty much everyone would feel dodgy about that level, but if that's the case, where does one draw the line? The OP has decided to draw some sort of line at this level where he feels it's an issue. A relationship consists of two people, no matter how comfortable they are with their own deal, they should equally be comfortable with 90% of each others, or compromise to some degree where issues may arise.

This has ALL got to do with your attitude and judgments on this.

Yes I agree and in an ideal world..... But the fact is none of us are an island and we all live in whichever societies take on such things. So his feelings stem from that and the feeling that how he feels his partner may be perceived in a bad way. Now we can lament this all we like, but it is what it is and to ignore it or entirely put it on him would frankly be daft IMHO.

If they are 'constantly' doing this, then it is because you have allowed them to and forgot to tell them STFU and mind their own business.

I agree with this, but this is his close family and not some strangers. Now family can be twats, I know that only too well, but again, dialogue and an aim of compromise would be my first choice and only if that broke down then and only then would the STFU guns be brought out. Even at that I would work the agree to disagree angle as STFU hardly fosters any further dialogue. Yes she's his partner and that's cool, but his family will be there, for better or worse for a lifetime, even if she's not.

If it was me, I would sit her down and tell her first and foremost that you love her and respect her for who she is and you find her very sexy and you understand the boost of confidence her feeling sexy has for her, but that her overt sexually provocative dressing(for this culture) is making you feel a bit uncomfortable. Further make it clear that while your family are giving out about it, you're feelings are coming from a different angle. An angle of concern for how she may be perceived by others in this culture. Then sit back and listen to her take on it. She may agree somewhat or disagree in a big way. But listen to her and see where that takes you.

prinz

Terodil wrote: »

What?

There's a distinct and important difference between a sexily-clad person and a sex object. :rolleyes:

Person A dresses sexily to present an image as a good sex-mate to person B.Person A does so in the hope of being viewed as potentially a sex-object. A 'sex-object' is viewed from the point of view of sex only. A person dressing sexily initially encourages and reinforces that point of view.

pikachucheeks

Unregistered wrote: »

Im going out with my gf for a year now. I love her and she loves me.

Problem : She dresses too sexy.

She is 30 years old and looks fantastic, has an amazing body. Even if we go to the supermarket she will wear really short skirt and tight top.
Yesterday we went out for a walk and she was hanging out of the top she was wearing. As we walked along, every man woman and dog/cat would look at her boobs as we walked by.

I can appreciate that your girlfriend's proud of her body, and why shouldn't she be? But if it's causing you hassle, then I would say it to her.

Your family obviously have an issue with her dress sense, so something does need to be done before you get married.
Otherwise, you could be put in a position where you have to choose your wife, or family.

If I loved someone, and they expressed a concern about me dressing too sexily, then I would make an effort to change.

I wouldn't want to embarrass my OH, or their family, by the way I dress.

Terodil

prinz wrote: »

Person A dresses sexily to present an image as a good sex-mate to person B.Person A does so in the hope of being viewed as potentially a sex-object. A 'sex-object' is viewed from the point of view of sex only. A person dressing sexily initially encourages and reinforces that point of view.

Has anybody just initiated a time warp? Are you reading what you are typing there?

A sex object is an 'object', i.e. something that doesn't act by itself or has any volition on its own. Subjects use the object without the object having a say.

People, however, have several dimensions, you know. They usually act of their own volition (as clearly shown in this thread), and they can be interested in looking sexy, but that does not mean that they make themselves available to anybody. It does not mean that they become objects ripe for the taking.

Of course it sends signals, it may invite flirts or looks, but that's got nothing to do with inviting sex itself.

'sex object'... rofl

Silverfish

OP, can I ask why you went out with her in the first place if the way she dresses offends you?

MagicMarker

I agree with Stormwarrior.

It really does sound like she has issues surrounding her body.

If I can see someone's ass cheeks in the local Spar, I'm not going to think ''more power to her'', I'm going to think ''WTF'', if anything I'll probably feel sorry for her.

Bottle_of_Smoke

Discuss with her why she dresses like a lapdancer going out for a walk. She might flip out but I think its worth it. She has a problem and is likely to flip out no matter how ultra-sensitive you approach this.

It's unhelathy that she needs people to pay that much attention to her. Be completely honest about how it makes you feel.

Wagon

MagicMarker wrote: »

If I can see someone's ass cheeks in the local Spar, I'm not going to think ''more power to her'', I'm going to think ''WTF'', if anything I'll probably feel sorry for her.

It seems that women believe that it's their right to dress in as little as they want (which is fair enough) but that any male who disagrees with it is a sexist. And if he feels threatened by it and that he's weak. It makes very little sense.

ellie1

Maybe its a cultural thing. Here in Ireland , we tend not too show too much flesh cos we incur the wrath of men and women who scorn and look down on women who look fantastic. Women are then called sluts, lap dancers and all kinds of other nasty comments.

In other countries, women are encouraged to look good in order to make their man look good. All you need to do is sit down and talk to her. Explain the difference of how she is percieved here in Ireland will be different to back home.

StormWarrior

Some people seem to be confusing slutty with sexy. Saying that people who look good incur the wrath of others is silly here. I'm female, and if I see a woman looking sexy in a nice classy dress or tight jeans or whatever, I think good for her, and use it as an inspiration to keep myself in good shape. But I fail to see how a grown woman walking around with her arse cheeks and everything else on show is sexy. I would say it probably looks more desperate than sexy. What man would really want his future wife and possibly mother of his child looking like that in public? I think the OP should maybe ask her why she feels the need to dress this way in this cold climate where it's not really the norm. Of course people have a right to dress however they want, but they will just have to accept that not everyone appreciates their dress sense. The OP isn't expecting her to put a burka on, just get a skirt a few inches longer. I mean she is 30 now, not a teenager. Good for her if she has a hot body, but there really is a time and a place. At the end of the day, it is not bad that the OP wants people to respect his fiance, but its hard to respect someone who walks around dressed like a lapdancer.

prinz

Terodil wrote: »

Has anybody just initiated a time warp? Are you reading what you are typing there?

A sex object is an 'object', i.e. something that doesn't act by itself or has any volition on its own. Subjects use the object without the object having a say.

People, however, have several dimensions, you know. They usually act of their own volition (as clearly shown in this thread), and they can be interested in looking sexy, but that does not mean that they make themselves available to anybody. It does not mean that they become objects ripe for the taking.

Of course it sends signals, it may invite flirts or looks, but that's got nothing to do with inviting sex itself.

'sex object'... rofl

wtf has a time warp got to do with anything?

You dress sexily so people look at you and think of sex not to show you have a Phd in rocket science...


I never said anything about availability or being 'ripe for the taking'..ffs so get off the high horse.

Gyalist

OP, I love me my Brasileirinhas but they can be very difficult.

Your posts are waving so many red flags though that it seems that you are in a "pussy trance" and sleepwalking your way into a disaster.

Unregistered wrote: »

Im going out with my gf for a year now. I love her and she loves me.

Problem : She dresses too sexy.

She is 30 years old and looks fantastic, has an amazing body. Even if we go to the supermarket she will wear really short skirt and tight top.
Yesterday we went out for a walk and she was hanging out of the top she was wearing. As we walked along, every man woman and dog/cat would look at her boobs as we walked by.

Im not insecure, Im not a jealous person but I have heard other women say bad things about the way she dresses.

She is brazillian and very confident, and I love the way she is, but how do I tell her to tone it down a little bit without offending her.

And dont rip me to shreds, Im posting this as Im fed up with some of the bad comments she gets.

OP, have you ever been to Brazil. It is such an openly sexual society that many things that would cause eyebrows to be raised here are completely normal there. That being said, even though it is a hot country the vast majority of women there don't dress like streetwalkers.

Unregistered wrote: »

thank you for the reply

I am not at all insecure and jealous.

I love her to bits, its just that shes goes a bit OTT sometimes, skirt short enough to see cheeks of ass etc. Thats nothing to do with insecurity on my part, I still want her to wear a short skirt, just not one where the world can see the mole on her ass cheek

I'm sure that she is very aware that she is drawing attention to herself. She must be aware that's not how the majority of people in Ireland dress.

Unregistered wrote: »

oh I forgot to add, she got a boob job a few months ago. Before the boob job she never wore tops like that. I suppose she just wants to flaunt what shes got.

I've stood up for her against my mother and sisters who constantly criticise her dress sense

Did you pay for the boob job? If she did, what does she work at? Do you really know what she does for a living?
Your mother and sisters are criticising her overt display of sexuality.

Unregistered wrote: »

ok ok

Im just fed up with how my mother and sisters constantly criticise her. I have not spoke to my mother in 2 months over this.

And we are no where near breaking up, actually getting married in the summer

Whoa, whoa!!! You've known this woman for just one year. Have you been to Brazil? Have you met her relatives? Do you speak or understand Portuguese? Do you know her friends in the Brazilian community? Is she depending on the marriage to you to be able to remain in Ireland? Do you really know this woman?

Any woman whose behavior causes a rift between you and your family is to be treated with suspicion. That is, provided that your family's concerns are reasonable.

Unregistered wrote: »

I never try to be the boss of her. Its nothing to do with my attitude, I have a healthy attititude to bodies, flesh and people feeling comfortable wearing what they like.

The reason I started this post, is that she genuinely dresses cheap and tacky (there, Ive said it).

A woman can still be sexy without boobs hanging out.

I quite agree with you here. No man in his right mind wants the potential mother of his children dressing like a streetwalker

I know that your original question was about the way that she dresses but there are so many other things that have aroused my suspicion in the light of the experiences of other people that I've met.

SarahSassy

Silverfish wrote: »

OP, can I ask why you went out with her in the first place if the way she dresses offends you?

He did say she used to wear different and not so revealing clothes before she had the boob job...

OP, I would mention it to her in a softly softly way... Does she ever ask you 'do i look ok?' and if she does there is your chance each time..

pookie82

Terodil wrote: »

What's dressing in a sexy way got to do with wanting to be viewed as a sexual object?!

Most ridiculous comment I've heard in a long time. There is a clear and obvious connection between dressing sexily and wanting sexual attention. Any girl out there who goes down to aldi with her new (paid for) boobs on show and her as cheeks hanging out the back of her miniscule skirt is not doing it to catch the sun in this country. She clearly wants to be admired by the opposite sex. You do not flaunt that much flesh and not expect, or want, men to think about one thing only when they look at you. Being mock shocked at the idea that anyone could even begin to link the two is silly.

I'm tired of people being fake outraged at the idea that he won't accept her the way she is. She sounds like a skank.

Wibbs spoke sense. Yes in a prefect world we'd all love each other, have no problems with the way our partner's look and dress, and would never have issues with the behaviour of our other halves. Unfortunately, we live in the real world, where the majority of people would be mortified and very pissed off at their future wife dressing like a tramp.

From a practical point of view - OP is she not constantly freezing???

Red Alert

I'd just ignore the comments, I'd kill for a girlfriend who looked like her by the sounds of it. The trouble in Ireland is that too many people haven't time to do anything except criticize those who are confident about the way they appear or dress.

pookie82

Red Alert wrote: »

I'd just ignore the comments, I'd kill for a girlfriend who looked like her by the sounds of it. The trouble in Ireland is that too many people haven't time to do anything except criticize those who are confident about the way they appear or dress.

I agree to an extent that there are a lot of begrudgers out there who would rather bitch about a hot foreign chick in spar than go out and work to look that good themselves.

But there's a big difference between being confident and going completely over the top so that you resemble a call girl. Maybe in Brazil it's acceptable to dress this way due to weather/culture but I can't get my head around how it could be practical or make any sense to do so here, unless you lacked confidence or wanted to attract guys to make yourself feel better. Which is fine unless her extremely uncomfortable OH is skulking behind her red faced and shamed.

I bet you any amount that most of the guys on here would think she's a stunner of he met her and would love to score a girl like her, but how long would they be happy for her to flash her backside when going for a pint of milk to the scorn of everyone who knows him? Pretty soon, I think that pride and attraction would turn to embarrassment for most partners.

Ann22

Op, I see your point. It must feel awful when you see people looking- either with men drooling but secretly glad their partners aren't wearing stuff like that or women who are amused by her lack of dress sense. I wouldn't like to think I was dressing in a way that was embarrassing my oh! I think a hint of cleavage in a top is far more flattering especially in the daytime. If it's for a night out clubbing if you're going to reveal your legs, you don't reveal a big cleavage as well, it looks tacky. It's either one or the other, no matter how good your shape is. If my oh was strutting about the town with his shirt open to his navel I'd have to say something to him.
I know she may like to wear what she wears but would she be happy knowing it takes away some of the enjoyment you feel in her company? If you do tell her it's a little too much and she still wants to wear it, then you'll have to put up with it I suppose.

LegacyUser

they cant ALL be wrong you know,your mother,sister,uncles the strangers in the street..mole on her ass cheeks cos her skirt is so short??
she obviously loves all the male attention even though most men wouldn't want their own gfs looking like that..she sounds like a skank tbh and if she really really loved you as you say, would she not have put you and your family first by not allowing you to fall out with them because your mam is ashamed of the way she lets her boobs hang out..what will she wear to the wedding-a sheer thong and two nipple tassells?

zxcvbnm1

Unregistered wrote: »

they cant ALL be wrong you know,your mother,sister,uncles the strangers in the street..mole on her ass cheeks cos her skirt is so short??
she obviously loves all the male attention even though most men wouldn't want their own gfs looking like that..she sounds like a skank tbh and if she really really loved you as you say, would she not have put you and your family first by not allowing you to fall out with them because your mam is ashamed of the way she lets her boobs hang out..what will she wear to the wedding-a sheer thong and two nipple tassells?

ya - she certainly doesn't sound like the classiest bird in the world.

MAybe the other poster is right in that instead of falling out with your family defending her instead why not talk to her.

Lets face it - obviouly you can see yourself that she could do with a talking to.

By the way - prepare for her to get defensive.
Clearly you got defensive to the point of not even talking to your own mother for 2 months even though deep down you actually agree with her.
Gotta pick you up on that one by the way - that's bizare behaviour on your part given that you actually agree with your mother ??
What's that about?

I can understand you getting a bit defensive - but 2 montsh of silent treatment ???
Bizarre indeed.

Dudess

Well I'm one of the "girl power" brigade but even I have limits and a sense of reality.

Seems like the OP's girlfriend dresses really trashily - wouldn't blame him for feeling uncomfortable when he's with her and all and sundry are perving. Seems like she's very attractive too and yet she's actually taking from her attractiveness with this style.

A woman can look sexy and celebrate a great body without losing class.

Looking like a prostitute/lapdancer aside, it seems like she just looks very silly - e.g. having her bumcheeks partially on display. The OP seems like a reasonable guy - those who are accusing him of being jealous and controlling appear to be just itching for an argument/not reading the posts properly (and it's guys as well as girls).

OP, tell her it looks silly and she's attracting negative rather than positive attention (which is what she's looking for). This climate does not accommodate such a method of (un)dressing and thus, she just looks odd. People may be thinking "phwoar, she's hot" but also "Christ, she looks ridiculous". Some may argue she shouldn't worry about what people think, but what about her boyfriend feeling uncomfortable, which he can't help?
Also OP, tell her she'd look so much more beautiful and sexy if she wore clothes that are still sexy and figure-hugging but aren't tacky looking - a stretchy mini-dress with a neck that's not too high but not allowing her breasts to fall out either, a mini-skirt a few inches below the ass with a gently figure-hugging plain top with spaghetti string straps, which again covers the breasts; a pair of tight-fitting jeans that show off her legs, and a pretty lace top. A maxi dress! One of the sexiest items of clothing there is (in my opinion).

And also tell her, trashy clothing often means anything but sexy.

I disagree with the rape comment - often rape isn't even about sexual gratification. At the same time though, a woman would be stupid to dress like that and walk around an area alone where she might invite unwanted attention (e.g. late at night). It wouldn't be her fault if some bastard raped her, but it's fair to say she'd be the one drawing attention to herself.