Stuff that benefits during a recession

Darkbloom

• Radio talk shows - more people at home to call in, a plethora of loudmouths willing to talk about how dem Nigerians in the mansion next door claim €20,000 a week off the DSFA, while eating swans.
• Scapegoating - the Poles! the Chinese! the US! the teachers!
• Smugness - "ahahahaha I saved my communion money and put it in a deposit account and now earn millions in interest, ye should have been clever like me."

Any more?:D

jaffa20

Less traffic on the roads. I can get to work on time.

Rent has gone down.

Prices have decreased.

Turd Ferguson

Kleenex - for all the people to cry into when they lose their jawbs

Vain

My body been going to the gym everyday since i lost my job. Get to sleep more too.

Rocky Balboa 2

bumsekz

kelle

Newry

Darkbloom

ctrl + f + "my taxes".

holly1

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Kleenex - for all the people to cry into when they lose their jawbs

S.A.P.

gurramok

Exercise as more people moan hence more calories burnt :P

Darkbloom

gurramok wrote: »

Exercise as more people moan hence more calories burnt :P

Judging by your performance in the teacher thread, you must be fairly scrawny by now.;)

gurramok

Darkbloom wrote: »

Judging by your performance in the teacher thread, you must be fairly scrawny by now.;)

Yeh, the beer belly has disappeared in the last 24hrs.

I'd sell you my secret diet to lift me out of recession but its too late now

mick.fr

Darkbloom wrote: »

how dem Nigerians in the mansion next door claim €20,000 a week off the DSFA, while eating swans.

Damn, I wish I was a Nigerian sometimes lol

KnifeWRENCH

Undertakers and funeral directors.
Worsening economic situation -> more misery and poverty -> more deaths -> jackpot for funeral homes.
If there's a huge market crash we'll see loads of bankers and business type people tragically leaping to their deaths off high buildings.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to undertaker college. *fetches Victorian-style top hat*

Jet Black

Caviar bars, the recession has not hit dublin airport as there opening one at the end of this month.

hop2it

pawn brokers , repro men and auction houses

phasers

lidl

Ruu_Old

McDonalds and Walmart.

[-0-]

Shrinks get more customers.
More people do the lotto.
Supermarkets do more business as less people eat out.
Off licenses do more business as less people go out.

Saibh

Any discount stores

Thundercats Ho

Milkmen are busier.
(I'm not a milkman, or a milktray man)

Terry

holly1 wrote: »

S.A.P.

What does that mean?

gurramok wrote: »

Yeh, the beer belly has disappeared in the last 24hrs.

I'd sell you my secret diet to lift me out of recession but its too late now

You mustn't be on the dole if your beer belly is smaller.

mukki

mechanics! You can't buy or sell a car so you have to get it serviced or repaired.

Aidric

Satellite TV companies.

drunkymonkey

Get to make more sticky! ..... nothing else to do!

Necronomicon

Receivership companies. Must be a lucrative one to get into right now.

keane2097

Butchers due to less people eating out.

Similarly chicken farmers apparently...

ejmaztec

The Nazi party and AK47 Plc.

Soulja boy

[-0-] wrote: »

Shrinks get more customers.

they actually don't, its deemed a non-essential by most people and is the first to go when money gets tight. Theres a lot of psychiatrists and psychoanalysts finding it really tough right now.

southofnowhere

mukki wrote: »

mechanics! You can't buy or sell a car so you have to get it serviced or repaired.

True, especially with tyres.

Ask any dealer, when the country went mad with money people weren't buying tyres, just new cars. Sounds stupid, but it's true.

As for the psychiatrists and psychoanalysts finding it really tough right now at least they're well equipped to deal with it!

Debt collectors doing very well, especially the real thugs and gangsters.

All fast food places, pizza places particularly.

Job recruitment websites.

xOxSinéadxOx

cobblers

Sam Vimes

Butlins in England has had something like a 30% increase in bookings

useful_contacts

The fact that when my friends ask me to go out and i say i cant afford it they understand rather than asking me why i cant afford it:rolleyes:

ya-ba-da-ba-doo

dutch gold.

KeyLimePie

What i dislike about the recession is people going JESUS THAT'S SO MUCH when i tell them it's 1.69€ for the bottle of coke they're getting and then say IT'D A YOYO IN TESCO...............GO TO FREAKIN' TESCO!!!!

but benefits of the recession, cheaper clothes =D

Rented Mule

...and then the whores come in.

K-9

Rented Mule wrote: »

...and then the whores come in.

Huh?

Pizzas and chip vans.

Joey the lips

More sex, the moth is less tired cause I do all the housework as apposed to share ( for all you liberals)

Baths instead of showers - have more time

Vincent de paul - More volenteers

Sweet shops - Bored sh1tless impulse feel happy foods

Grass: It gets cut more!

Car: It gets cleaned more

Postman: Busy delivering reminders.

Mass: A sudden increase in faith or a what the hell it cant be bad, Gets me away from that fcukin house for an hour!

Barbers: Men vring there kids to barber instead of hairdresser

Barber 5 euro Hair dresser 10 Euro

WindSock

The people boasting about all their houses are now deeply in debt.

Joey the lips

WindSock wrote: »

The people boasting about all their houses are now deeply in debt.

Dont be so bad, where is the benefit? and what do you mean boasting. boasting cause they have a house? Or boasting cause you dont

The only benefit here is for debt collectors

jimbling

gambling

Mr.Lizard

hop2it wrote: »

pawn brokers , repro men and auction houses

I had one of them visit my house in the dead of night last week. I heard a lot of rattling outside my window and then a sudden car engine sound. At the time I thought nothing of it and went back to sleep. However the next morning when I went outside to my surprise I had two cars in my driveway. One my original and the other an almost exact duplicate of it.

WindSock

Joey the lips wrote: »

Dont be so bad, where is the benefit? and what do you mean boasting. boasting cause they have a house? Or boasting cause you dont

The only benefit here is for debt collectors

Boasting because they have a few houses. I don't have to listen to them s hitein' on anymore. Thats the benefit. (not just houses I suppose, just material wealth in general)

godtabh

square_igloo wrote: »

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to undertaker college. *fetches Victorian-style top hat*

Its a dead end job

lynchpin

Apparently cheap lipstick sales go up during recessions.
Women will always wear it but will opt for the cheaper brands over the more expensive ones.

So people put your money in lipstick.

me-skywalker

music!
reading!


takeaways!
illegal downloads!!

useful_contacts

ebay- people selling everything they have
Off licences/takeaways
tesco own brand food

ahara

Me,

I know have an excuse to not have to work at a poxy job that I hated

ynotdu

ahara wrote: »

Me,

I know have an excuse to not have to work at a poxy job that I hated

ahara you should be taking care of buisness:p ;-)

reference to your Elvis jibe in the Tommy Cooper thread

Broad

Sainsbury's in Newry. Marks and Spencers' in Newry. Asda in Newry.

m5ex9oqjawdg2i

WindSock wrote: »

The people boasting about all their houses are now deeply in debt.

If they are deeply in debt, then they didn't own them houses outright.



Parks. Went to the park today and it was jammers...

ynotdu

not being able to afford newspapers to read what we can,t afford?????