How much of a Simpsons buff are you?

bnagrrl

Homer (inspecting his squad): All right, men. It's time to clean-up this town! (pause)
Skinner: Meaning what exactly?
Homer: You know, push people around, make ourselves feel big.

---

Kent Brockman: Well, what do you say to the accusation that your group has been causing more crimes than it's been preventing?
Homer: Oh, Kent, I'd be lying if I said my men weren't committing crimes...
Kent Brockman: ...Well, touché.

bnagrrl

Lionel Hutz is a classic character, as is Troy McClure.

Hutz: All right, gentlemen, I'll take your case. But I'm going to have
to ask for a thousand-dollar retainer.
Bart: A thousand dollars? But your ad says "No money down".
[shows his paper ad: "Works on contingency basis. No money
down."]
Hutz: Oh! They got this all screwed up...
[makes a few corrections: "Works on contingency basis? No, money
down!"]
Bart: So you don't work on a contingency basis?
Hutz: No, money down! Oops, it shouldn't have this Bar Association logo
here either.

---

"Mr McClure, what does DNA stand for?"
[Troy stares blankly at Billy, then looks at the camera, cut to END.]

---

After Stampy the Elephant pulls Homer from the tar pit
Homer: I'm alive. I'm alive! And I owe it all to this feisty feline.
Lisa: Dad, "feline" means "cat".
Homer: Elephant, honey. It's an elephant!

Captain-America

Here's a classic I just remembered.

Marge: Bart, where are you going?
Bart: To teach Shelbyville a lesson.
Homer: Yes, Bart's a tutor now. Tute on son, tute on!

Thundercats Ho

Talkin out of turn... thats a paddlin
Lookin out the window... thats a paddlin
Starin at my sandals... thats a paddlin
Paddlin the school canoe... oh, you better believe thats a paddlin...

Shacklebolt

bnagrrl wrote: »

Homer (inspecting his squad): All right, men. It's time to clean-up this town! (pause)
Skinner: Meaning what exactly?
Homer: You know, push people around, make ourselves feel big.

---

Kent Brockman: Well, what do you say to the accusation that your group has been causing more crimes than it's been preventing?
Homer: Oh, Kent, I'd be lying if I said my men weren't committing crimes...
Kent Brockman: ...Well, touché.

You gotta supply your own knobs!

baglady

Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product.
Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy?
Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out.
Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said.
Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to.
Homer: Bart, go to your room.

Captain-America

Ha! That kids got bosoms! Look at him! Come here ya little butter ball!

Don't make me run! I'm full of chocolate!

adamb92

Can't sleep. Clown will eat me.

Captain-America

Smithers, release the robotic Richard Simmons.

bnagrrl

The boot kicked Bart! It kicked him right in the butt!

Lockstep

Shacklebolt wrote: »

Marge: Have you noticed any change in Bart?
Homer: New glasses?
Marge: No...he looks like something might be disturbing him.
Homer: Probably misses his old glasses.
Marge: I guess we could get more involved in Bart's activities but then
I'd be afraid of smothering him.
Homer: Yeah, and then we'd get the chair.
Marge: That's not what I meant.
Homer: It was, Marge, admit it.

Classic.

Probably the best example of Homer.
It just sums him up perfectly; the way he can just pluck something out of the air and treat is an established fact minutes later.

Terry

Dickety.

Shacklebolt

Terry wrote: »

Dickety.

Dickety? Highly dubious.

S.I.R

laoisforliam wrote: »

http://www.sporcle.com/games/simpsons.php

I got everyone well inside the limit

got em all with 7 oddd mins to spare, stupid spelling errors :mad:

allanb49

Bart - Dad you killed the Zombie flanders!!!
Homer - He was a zombie

---

Barney - WOW!!! Look at the size of that platform!

bnagrrl

Moe: Even when it was the bears I knew it was the immigints.

allanb49

always wanted to put a couch on the Luas tracks and take a pic of it when they stop to move it, call it wrong, call it life immitating art but it'd be fcuking HI-larious

yerayeah

If I could just say a few words, I'd be a better public speaker.


I'll never apologise! I'm sorry Lisa, but that's just the way I am.

allanb49

Homer singing- *HERES THE ANGEL SEE THE ANGEL ITS MY ANGEL NO ONE ELSES NEXT TOOOO THE RAKESSS*

bnagrrl

CompuGlobalHyperMegaNet

allanb49

bnagrrl wrote: »

CompuGlobalHyperMegaNet

Jr Vice President Homer Simpson speaking

livindadream

Cletus: Hey slow down I wants to talk to ya! Give us 300 pretzels!
Marge: That'll be 300 dollars!
Cletus: I dont think so, you see I got 300 coupons!!
Marge: hmmm, I should of set limit one per customer.
Cletus: Shoulda but didn't. Ok, now hand them over!

HEY KIDS! WE EATIN DINNER TONIGHT! CMON!
Tiffany, Heather, Cody, Dillan, Dermit, Jordan, Tailor, Brittney, Wesley, Rumor, Skyle, Cassidy, Zoe, Cloe, Max, Hunter, Kendel, Katelyn, Noah, Sasha, Morgan, Kira, Ean, Lauren, Kubert, Phil!

Wife: Now Cletus, why did ya haf to park next to my parents?
Cletus: Now, Now, Hun, they're my parents too... :):)

allanb49

Cletus - Hey i can call my maw from up here.
HEY MAW GET OFF THE DANG ROOF!

zootroid

Where Homer is accused of sexual harassment:

Homer: Oh God, why have you forsaken me?
(phone rings)
Homer: (nervously) Hello?
Voice: Homer, this is God.....frey Jones


Gets me everytime!

User45701

anniehoo wrote: »

Ill probably be alienated from this forum after this...but ive never seen a full Simpsons episode EVER!!! I swear and am often completely lost in conversations when 10 minutes in ive copped its pure Simpsons quotes :o

/dont hate me

Dont like it or just not a TV person?

homerun_homer wrote: »

I've got a Simpsosn's question that no one can definitively answer.

What was the last good episode of the Simpson's before it went downhill/jumped the shark?

Anyone who argues that there has been the odd good episode since it's gone downhill is automatically disqualified.

Huh? you have to give a set date for when it went "downhill" or else how can anyone even begin to work out a episode

Armin_Tamzarian

There hasn't been much mention here of the brilliance that is Sideshow Bob (and his brother Cecil of course).

It's jokes like the following that are what was great about the Simpsons IMO.


Lawyer: What about that tattoo on your chest, doesn't it say "DIE BART DIE"?
Sideshow Bob: No, that's German for "Thee Bart Thee"
Parole Board Member: No one who speaks German could be an evil man...
Parole Board Member: Parole Granted

WindSock

Karsini wrote: »

There's an interesting story behind this nickel. It was 1957 so it was. I got up and made myself a piece of toast. I set the toaster to threeeee.... medium brown!

Baaack then it was just old Edison reciting the alphabet. AAaaaaaaaay he would say. Then B. C would usually follow...

bnagrrl

zootroid wrote: »

Where Homer is accused of sexual harassment:

Homer: Oh God, why have you forsaken me?
(phone rings)
Homer: (nervously) Hello?
Voice: Homer, this is God.....frey Jones


Gets me everytime!

That's a great episode!

Homer: Everything's going to be just fine. No go upstairs, and pack your bags...we're going to start a new life...under the sea.
I]calypso music starts[/I

Homer: Under the sea, under the sea,
There'll be no accusations, just friendly crustaceans
Under the sea!

Marge: Homer, that's your solution to everything: to move under the sea.
It's not going to happen!

Homer: Not with that attitude!

Captain-America

Now to write another delicious memo. Mmmm, memo....

Brian2208

Ralph: Hi prinstible Skinner, Hi Super Nintendo Chalmers, we're learnding!

Classic:)

Riddle101

zootroid wrote: »

Where Homer is accused of sexual harassment:

Homer: Oh God, why have you forsaken me?
(phone rings)
Homer: (nervously) Hello?
Voice: Homer, this is God.....frey Jones


Gets me everytime!

During the film based off of homer
Ashley: No Mr Simpson a cat is a living creature
Homer: I don't care. Now i'm gonna grab me some sweet candy
Ashley: Mr Simpson, that's sexual harrasment if you keep that up i'll scream so the whole country can hear.
Homer: With a man in the White House, not likely

Homer: Somebody had to take the babysitter home, then i noticed her sweet candy.
Jones: So you admit you want her candy
Homer: Sweet can, sweet candy
Jones: Mr Simpson? Mr Simpson why are you looking at me like that? No no nooooooooooooo!

Also during a Sideshow Bob episode
*Homer reads letter*
Homer: oh my god somebody's trying to kill me. Oh wait this is for Bart.

bnagrrl

Riddle101 wrote: »

During the film based off of homer
Ashley: No Mr Simpson a cat is a living creature
Homer: I don't care. Now i'm gonna grab me some sweet candy
Ashley: Mr Simpson, that's sexual harrasment if you keep that up i'll scream so the whole country can hear.
Homer: With a man in the White House, not likely

Homer: Somebody had to take the babysitter home, then i noticed her sweet candy.
Jones: So you admit you want her candy
Homer: Sweet can, sweet candy
Jones: Mr Simpson? Mr Simpson why are you looking at me like that? No no nooooooooooooo!

Kent Brockman: Remember to tune in at 8:00 for highlights of today's vigil, including when the garbage man came and when Marge Simpson put the cat out...possibly because it was harassed, we don't know.

speedboatchase

Homer: What is a wedding? Websters Dictionary defines it as "the process of removing weeds from ones garden"


Bart: (Looking for the Springfield Lemon Tree) This is about as useless as that old lemon-shaped rock over there. Hey wait a minute.... there's a lemon behind that rock!


Also when Marge is sentenced to Monster Island and the judge tells her not to worry, "its just a name". Next scene shes being chased by Monsters and the guy goes "what he meant to say was Monster Island is actually a peninsula"

allanb49

Smithers - Sir i dont think this is a good idea women and sea-men dont mix
Burns - We all know what you think, Young lady you're hired

bnagrrl

Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors - oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?"

8k2q1gfcz9s5d4

creggy wrote: »

Eat my shorts children

yes eat all of our shirts

about 2 years ago my mate was trying to show me hoe to hook up a dvd recorder to sky and the tv, after he spent about 2 minutes talking with me not getting a word in, i looked at him and said, "Its a ring toss game"

Mr Benevolent

In Futurama:

(Bender comes across a pile of Bart Simpson talking dolls and pulls the string)

Doll: 'Eat my Shorts!'
Bender: 'Ok!' (Eats doll's shorts)
Bender: 'Mmmmm... shorts!'

Captain-America

Bart: I've got a watch with a minute hand!
Smithers: Okay, what time is it?
Bart: 12:80. No, wait, what comes after twelve?
Smithers: One.
Bart: No, after twelve!
Smithers: Ughh!

keano_afc

Homer, there's someone here to help you.
Batman?
No, a scientist.
Batman's a scientist?

Kimia

Homer : Look Marge, you don't know what it's like - I'm the one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I'm not out of order. You're out of order. The whole freakin' system is out of order. You want the truth? You want the truth? You can't HANDLE the truth. 'Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do. Forget it, Marge, it's Chinatown.

Burns: Mattingly, get rid of those sideburns.
Mattingly: What sideburns?
Burns: You heard me, hippy!

Burns: Mattingly, for the last time, get rid of those sideburns!
Mattingly: Look, Mr. Burns, I don't know what you think sideburns are, but-
Burns: DON'T ARGUE WITH ME, JUST GET RID OF THEM!


[The audience boos Burns' film]
Mr. Burns: Smithers, are they booing me?
Smithers: No, they're saying... "Boo-urns. Boo-urns".
Mr. Burns: Are you saying Boo... or Boo-urns?
[The audience boos louder]
Moleman: I was saying Boo-urns.

bnagrrl

This is Moleman in the morning.
Good Moleman to you.

norwegianwood

some folks'll never eat a skunk, but then again some folk'll, like cletus, the slack jawed yokel!

norwegianwood

speedboatchase wrote: »

Also when Lisa is sentenced to Monster Island and the judge tells her not to worry, "its just a name". Next scene shes being chased by Monsters and the guy goes "what he meant to say was Monster Island is actually a peninsula"

FYP

banquo

Dr. Frink: Good morning Ma'am. Good afternoon Sir. It passed noon as I was talking so that was technically correct.

Shacklebolt

You want the truth? You can't handle the truth! No truth-handler are you! I deride your truth-handling abilities!

Captain-America

keano_afc wrote: »

Homer, there's someone here to help you.
Batman?
No, a scientist.
Batman's a scientist?

It's not Batman!

tech77

Shacklebolt wrote: »

You want the truth? You can't handle the truth! No truth-handler are you! I deride your truth-handling abilities!

Kelsey Grammer (yeah, Grammer with an "e" apparently) was a great choice to voice Sideshow Bob.

phasers

Oh Yeah, shake it, Madam. Capital knockers.

Captain-America

He's not a genius, he's an actor. And second, he's not much of an actor.

baglady

Captain-America wrote: »

Bart: I've got a watch with a minute hand!
Smithers: Okay, what time is it?
Bart: 12:80. No, wait, what comes after twelve?
Smithers: One.
Bart: No, after twelve!
Smithers: Ughh!

Bart: Hmm..."order by phone"..."1-800"...our phone doesn't go up to 800! Unless...



and also:

Homer: Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel.

and I just remembered this cracker:

You'll have to speak up. I'm wearing a towel!