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Deal Breakers

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    #32
    Pyr0
    Registered Users Posts: 5,967 ✭✭✭Pyr0


    Lobelia Overhill wrote: »
    The remote control for the television is mine. Not yours. Mine. Got that?!

    Controlling the remote control, forget about it.

    +1 with the relgious beliefs taken to extremes, it angers me to no end and do my best to distance myself from it.


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    #33
    Aisling(",)
    Registered Users Posts: 6,402 ✭✭✭Aisling(",)


    Kids would definietly put me off a lad.
    im almost 100% certain that i never want any

    overly protective and clingy lads make me head for the hills.yes i have male friends just because im out with them dosent mean im going to cheat so get off your high horse.!


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    #34
    pikachucheeks
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,488 ✭✭✭pikachucheeks


    Like a lot of people,

    Lying and being unfaithful are a big issue for me. - Why be in a relationship if you don't want to commit to that person?

    As well as that, I couldn't be with someone who was rude, or someone who made no effort with my family or friends.

    On a more unusual note, I also couldn't tolerate someone who used shorthand text and made no effort to be grammatically correct - It's just bad manners, I think!
    Big pet peeve of mine!


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    #35
    sam34
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,073 ✭✭✭sam34


    hepcat wrote: »
    It is interesting the number of people who really don't want to have children. I would love to know your age profile, and I do not mean this in any negative or condescending way.

    i'm one of those women, am 29 years old and have known for years and years that i do not want children.

    i'm the youngest in a large family and i have watched all my siblings have children. i've seen their lives change beyond recognition. thats not something i want for myself.

    neither do i want the responsibility, hassle, pressure, stress and burden of children.

    it's never-ending, imho..... no thanks!

    and finally, i just hate kids :pac:


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    #36
    chocgirl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 697 ✭✭✭chocgirl


    don't know if I want children yet but definitely wouldn't go for a guy who has kids already

    Smoking would be a major dealbreaker for me too, would turn me right off!
    Bad manners, rudeness, disrespect also.


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    #37
    GirlInterrupted
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,440 ✭✭✭GirlInterrupted


    hepcat wrote: »
    I'm not against people not wanting kids, by the way. If anything, I admire their being independent and responsible, rather than just doing something because its always been done that way..

    I've no problem with someone choosing to be child-free, but I'm not one of those people, and it doesn't mean I want children just because its the 'done thing'.

    Not wanting children is a deal-breaker. As is infidelity, insufferable possessiveness, isms (as in racism, sexism etc), and untrustworthiness.

    A lack of affection, smoking, or emotional detachment would be hugely challenging to me too.


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    #38
    cson
    Registered Users Posts: 14,454 ✭✭✭✭cson


    Ireland is set for a major population decrease by the looks of things :p


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    #39
    Lobelia Overhill
    Closed Accounts Posts: 704 ✭✭✭Lobelia Overhill


    Pyr0 wrote: »
    Controlling the remote control, forget about it.

    *beats Pyr0 back with a stick*

    it's MINE!!!!




    :)


    Or I could just find some fella who likes the same TV shows as me!!


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    #40
    MadgeBadge
    Registered Users Posts: 228 ✭✭MadgeBadge


    Deal breaker 1- Putting me down to make themselves feel good

    Deal breaker 2- A love of Nickleback

    And all that other stuff too.


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    #41
    RxQueen
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,821 ✭✭✭RxQueen


    ^^ nickleback suck ^_^

    Hmm dealbreaker :

    cheating (altho thats a given really)

    Someone who just has to be the loudest person in the room , or has to put people are the butt of there joke just to get a few lulz( this stands for anyone in my life)

    someone having a child wouldnt bother me tbh, just once they wouldnt expect me to have anything to do with it, im still at the point where kids scare the crap out of me


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    #42
    fits
    Registered Users Posts: 13,461 ✭✭✭✭fits


    Too stingy or too free and easy with their money. Been with very extreme examples of both and I couldnt be bothered again.
    Dishonesty
    not being able to match me in an argument. I need to be challenged.


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    #43
    Piste
    Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    My boundries are fairly loose and moveable, but some things I like to think I wouldn't back down on like drug abuse (use is fine, but if I was going out with someone who becamse drug addict I couldn't handle that and would definitely break up with them. I'd try to remain friends and help them through it but no way would I remain as their girlfriend)

    Any guy who was really controlling would just do my head in and would be instantly gone.

    Oh yes and smoking, that's just nasty.

    Hmm can't think of many others, things like cheating are being hit wouldn't necessarily be dealbreakers for me, I'd give a second chance but if it happened again I suppose that would be the end.


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    #44
    Nightwish
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,129 ✭✭✭Nightwish


    Infidelity is one. I'd never ever continue a relationship with someone who has cheated. And in the future I'd never want to be pressured into having children. I really, really dont want them. Right now my bf is in agreement with me, so its all good!


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    #45
    LivingDeadGirl
    Registered Users Posts: 1,150 ✭✭✭LivingDeadGirl


    +1 on smoking, bleugh


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    #46
    sam34
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,073 ✭✭✭sam34


    LivingDeadGirl wrote: »
    +1 on smoking, bleugh

    me too.

    it's my top physical turn off in a man.

    it's non-negotiable as far as i'm concerned.


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    #47
    Pyr0
    Registered Users Posts: 5,967 ✭✭✭Pyr0


    Actually, smoking is one for me too. Every time I see an attractive girl lighting up it's an instant "No thanks".


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    #48
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Pyr0 wrote: »
    Actually, smoking is one for me too. Every time I see an attractive girl lighting up it's an instant "No thanks".

    That is how I feel when I hear people say the hate cats or admire FF.


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    #49
    MJOR
    Registered Users Posts: 1,796 ✭✭✭MJOR


    Hmmmmm it's got me thinking. I'd never want to change anybody but someone that is pig headed is a no no. Compromise is everything really. A deal breaker for me would be disrespect. Whether that be infidelity, emotional abuse or whatever.

    Have a dislike for overly materialistic people too...


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    #50
    Malari
    Registered Users Posts: 18,150 ✭✭✭✭Malari


    hepcat wrote: »
    Well...sort of, as in does your biological clock and brooding hormones take over at say, 35-39? Or is that a myth?

    I'm not against people not wanting kids, by the way. If anything, I admire their being independent and responsible, rather than just doing something because its always been done that way..

    I can't say whether it's a myth or not, but I've never had the urge, and most women I know who do want kids seem to have made that decision long before the age of 35-39.

    Maybe that's just the age-range where it starts getting urgent to have a baby before it's "too late".

    I wouldn't risk the relationship I have anyway for an urge to have kids, if that happens to me in a few years. I would supress it!


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    #51
    jenizzle
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 6,817 ✭✭✭jenizzle


    Most of what's been said (lying, cheating, lack of respect, none of the same interests etc...) but a big one for me is a fella who can't hold down a job, or is on the dole cos they're too lazy to go working. That just really irks me! Of course, if they've just been laid off, and can't get another job but not for the lack of trying, that's a totally different story.


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    #52
    Clare Bear
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,613 ✭✭✭✭Clare Bear


    Smoking (looks like a lot of us here hate smoking!) My boyfriend gave up for me, I detest smoking with a passion so it was me or the cigs!
    Not liking animals
    Not making an effort with my family and friends
    Obvious ones like cheating, dishonesty, lack of trust.

    Other than that I'm easy going.


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    #53
    LouOB
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,181 ✭✭✭LouOB


    Am in LTR am happy to have found someone who doesnt smoke, doesnt have kids, has job, manners, decent upbringing (right from wrong thingy), good health, most of his teeth etc - sounds like an angle on paper huh (until you smell the farts and hear the snoring gawd)
    But if he bought a pair of crocs or jesus sandles - OUT
    I hate men who wear pink, pet peeve, so one day BF comes home with pink fushia polo top. It never seen his wardrobe - went into my gym pile. Pink on men - sorry no go


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    #54
    pikachucheeks
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,488 ✭✭✭pikachucheeks


    LouOB wrote: »
    But if he bought a pair of crocs or jesus sandles - OUT


    HAHAHAH
    Excellent!

    I totally agree! -Even worse would be a man who wore socks with jesus sandles ;)


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    #55
    uoluol
    Closed Accounts Posts: 318 ✭✭uoluol


    Could not go out with someone who doesn't know how to drive. I could live with him not having a car, but not being able to drive smacks of laziness.

    Would be very put out if my intended was still living at home. Don't think any full grown male over the age of say, 25 should be living under the same roof space as his mother. Or worse again, living at home and sharing a room with his brother - ugh!! (My sister once dumped a really great guy for this very reason, I totally agree.....)


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    #56
    Melange
    Registered Users Posts: 287 ✭✭Melange


    uoluol wrote: »
    Could not go out with someone who doesn't know how to drive. I could live with him not having a car, but not being able to drive smacks of laziness.

    What if the man in question grew up and was living in a large city, where public transport will fill all his needs? I know quite a few hardworking and ambitious men from Dublin in their mid-to-late 20s who can't drive, for the simple reason that there was never any need to. It's different for those, like me, who grew up outside a big city. Not driving really was not an option.


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    #57
    allabouteve
    Closed Accounts Posts: 844 ✭✭✭allabouteve


    uoluol wrote: »
    Could not go out with someone who doesn't know how to drive. I could live with him not having a car, but not being able to drive smacks of laziness.

    Would be very put out if my intended was still living at home. Don't think any full grown male over the age of say, 25 should be living under the same roof space as his mother. Or worse again, living at home and sharing a room with his brother - ugh!! (My sister once dumped a really great guy for this very reason, I totally agree.....)

    So he was a really great guy, but she dumped him because he hadn't moved out yet? She couldn't just ask him to move or wait until he could afford it?

    Moving out wasn't going to change his personality, it was just going to be a change in his living circumstances.


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    #58
    Clare Bear
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,613 ✭✭✭✭Clare Bear


    allabouteve wrote: »
    So he was a really great guy, but she dumped him because he hadn't moved out yet? She couldn't just ask him to move or wait until he could afford it?

    Moving out wasn't going to change his personality, it was just going to be a change in his living circumstances.

    Exactly, okay it's not ideal but maybe financial or other reasons prevented him from having his own place. Whatever the reason if he was a great guy it wasn't going to change what kind of person he is.


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    #59
    Malari
    Registered Users Posts: 18,150 ✭✭✭✭Malari


    Aren't we talking about deal-breakers here? I mean I personally would be holding any man with jesus-sandals or crocs back with a barge pole, of course.

    Smoking is also a total no-no when it comes to choosing a man, but it's a different thing if my boyfriend suddenly took up smoking. A deal-breaker? I don't know. It would signal that something seriously wrong was going on with him!


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    #60
    pow wow
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,288 ✭✭✭pow wow


    Telling lies, violence in any form, being miserable, excessive anger/angst (blimey there's a theme here!), serial complaining (about stuff he can change but won't) and lack of ambition.

    Other than that not too fussy :D;)


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    #61
    GirlInterrupted
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,440 ✭✭✭GirlInterrupted


    pow wow wrote: »
    Telling lies, violence in any form, being miserable, excessive anger

    Violence is a given, but anger in general frightens me. Couldn't live in fear of provoking unreasonable anger all the time.


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