Why don't men approach women?

sparkplug82

Ok, I am in a serious relationship so to be honest I am more asking this question on friends behalf - was out in town with 2 single friends on sat nite and NOT ONE guy approached any of us - ok correction, some did but they were either really drunk or just rude/not gentlemanly.

Now I know what ye are thinking - eh you girls are obviously total mingers and thats why no one tried to chat your mates up. But i am being genuinely unbiased here when i say that my friends are really pretty, normal, well dressed (not slutty or nerdy - just nice!) and more importantly, really nice girls who would not be b*tchy to a guy even if they were approached.

can anyone shed any light on this? what is it with men that they will not walk up to a girl and be like "hi, im john, what is your name" in a really genuine way? i know it must be intimidating for a guy but come on, a girl would so admire someone who did that.....any info/revelations would be hugely appreciated - i think my friends have vowed never to venture into town ever again!

Latchy

I am seem to recall reading some threads on boards over the last year or so about guys complaining of being rebuked by women whom they approached to chat

joeybloggs

Speaking in generalities, the average Irish male will have very little confidence in these situations due to the fact that we've spent most of our life's depending on the 'Dutch Courage' factor of alcohol.:rolleyes:

Mind you much the same can be said about the female population too.

But really It's not the early 1900's here, there's no glass ceilings anymore for a women's potential. If your friends are as confident and pretty as you make them out to be, surely they should have enough confidence to approach the lads......

MrStuffins

I too am in a serious relationship and i am glad to not have to approach girls anymore.

See, the problem is, there's a fair share of B***hes out there who, if you approach them, can be quite rude in their convayence of disinterest. And all men have an ego and don't like it when their ego is bruised.

I'm a very outgoing guy, but remember one time when i approached a girl and she was incredibly rude and actually insulting. I didn't approach a girl for ages after that haha.

I'm sure you and your mates are dead sound but it's very hard to differentiate between the ones who will engage you in a conversation or will pull your balls off and make you eat them!

mikemac

A fear of vicious putdowns in front of a girl and all her friends I suppose

Disease Ridden

I'll never understand women with posts like this! Do women have some sort of very EXACT number of men that they wat to try and chat them up?

Zero is too few apparently.

5 or 6 is too much.

What do yous want? Is 3 men and half a man's corpse enough for ya?

Listen. Us men arn't picky. Fcuk evolutionary biology and evolutionary psychology. Brainwash yourselves to go against your instincts and have sex with anybody who tries it on with ya.

veryangryman

MrStuffins wrote: »

I too am in a serious relationship and i am glad to not have to approach girls anymore.

See, the problem is, there's a fair share of B***hes out there who, if you approach them, can be quite rude in their convayence of disinterest. And all men have an ego and don't like it when their ego is bruised.

I'm a very outgoing guy, but remember one time when i approached a girl and she was incredibly rude and actually insulting. I didn't approach a girl for ages after that haha.

I'm sure you and your mates are dead sound but it's very hard to differentiate between the ones who will engage you in a conversation or will pull your balls off and make you eat them!

+1

Was going to post pretty much exact same thing.

I think the most fearful thing men have of splitting up with someone is the fear of having to go through all that god forsaken effort just to find someone who wont put you down when you approach them. Its why girls enjoy the singles life more. Just sit back, look pretty, have a cocktail and the guys will flock over in time. If they dont, just give a subtle hint and theyll still flock over.

On the other hand...

I think that the satisfaction of the chase/catch which men get is far more of a thrill than for the woman who knows whether this is all going to lead somewhere because (lets face it), she decided how far it goes from the nightclub to the nookie. Which leads them to feel as inadequate as a bunch of Millwall fans girlfriends

Millwall, Millwall, you're all really dreadful, and all your girlfriends are unfulfilled and alienated.

Nervous Wreck

I used to never ever approach women in pubs/clubs cos I never ever had the confidence and always feared that I'd:

1. get knocked back in front of my friends

2. realise that I had nothing to say and fumble over my words, making a fool of myself

3. try to chat up the girl in the group who has a boyfriend

4. come across really boring

5. not be good looking enough (i.e. try to bat out of my league)



So there ya go... There's 5 reasons off the top of my head........




However, I recently said b0llocks to all that and have started chatting away to people whenever it struck my fancy. It often happens that I'm not the girl's type or I pick the one who has a boyfriend or I get knocked back in front of my friends. But so what? I don't really care anymore. Life's too short! And hey, sometimes ya get it just right!!



Anyway, there's some possible reasons. Let's look at others. Are you going to the right places? A quiet 'old man' pub ain't the best place to go on the pull. Are you going to places that suit your age group? Are you giving off a positive impression (i.e. enjoying yourselves regardless of attention)? There's no greater turn-off than to see three girls sitting around staring into their drinks looking depressed. Seeing a few girls laughing away and havin the buzz is much more inviting! Don't be shy about trying to attract a little attention too, as you could easily be giving off a "don't disturb us, we're not interested" impression without even knowing it....

Good luck to yer mates!

LegacyUser

There's no greater turn-off than to see three girls sitting around staring into their drinks looking depressed. Seeing a few girls laughing away and havin the buzz is much more inviting! Don't be shy about trying to attract a little attention too, as you could easily be giving off a "don't disturb us, we're not interested" impression without even knowing it....

I agree with all of these points. Maybe your friends aren't being approached because you're huddled together in a seemingly impenetrable group? Speaking from experience, it's much harder to approach a group of girls and engage them in conversation than it is to do it with one (or even two) girls. Obviously this is not always the case as sometimes you encounter a really fun, upbeat and engaging group who give you a little bit of leeway no matter how awkward you think you are behaving. Try to be that group!!

Get your friends to be more aware of their body language and general vibe. Are they smiling? Do they look like they're having fun? Are they making eye contact with guys who they find attractive, giving them a reason to approach? Are you huddled together in a closed off circle, or are you facing outwards? Do you stick together in your group for the whole night or ever break away for a while and go explore the place yourself?

That is something I always do when I'm out. Maybe tell your friends to give it a shot...

The saying 'good things come to those who wait' comes to mind when I read things like this. This very rarely (if ever) works in situations like these. What does work is being proactive and going after what you want. So if your friends want to meet guys, then maybe they should think about doing some of the approaching.

Just my two centavos....

LegacyUser

Guys get a thing called approach anxiety.
It has nothing to with confidence (ie general confidence in other areas of life) or even with previous experiences of rejection IMO, it is an evolutionary glitch that is present to differing degrees in all men's brains.

If your friends really want to be approached more in pubs they should be open to conversation, smile at people passing by / who make eye contact, appear talkative and friendly to the bar staff, etc.

LegacyUser

Okay, was out last Friday night - was out with a load of male friends....

Saw 3 girls at the bar... went over, said hello, asked a question or two and got completly dismissed. There was no "hey, yeah, having a good time" or even a polite "sorry, we're on a girls night out". It was pretty harsh. But hey.

Thing is, if someone comes over to chat to me and I'm not interested, I'll chat back and then make my excuses... these girls left me hanging.

Later I spotted a really cute girl upstairs in the bar and later she happened to be sitting downstairs... went over, said hello and she was really chatty back. Ended up with her that night - she was really lovely and we had a great laugh (age difference was a bit too muc for anything serious though).

The first scenario is what I often experience with Irish girls. You go over being friendly and they see it as an imposition.

The second was a pleasant surprise.

I think a lot of it is to do with how open one is - the girl I ended up chatting to and kissing was very open (in a friendly way) and even if nothing had happened, I'd have walked away just happy to have chatted and met someone cool.

As for being rebuked by women, well, if a girl is going to be that dismissive when you approach her, she's probably not worth knowing.

LegacyUser

Well here's my opinion. I used to go chat up girls but I got tired of the princesses I encountered on the average night out, who think they are too good for me. I would think I'm reasonably good lucking, like to have a laugh but apparently thats not enough. Maybe I need a big fat wallet?
But anyway, I prefer to go home with my dignity in my pocket, instead of losing it to some stuck up cow.

MIN2511

Hmmm....

A subject close to my heart...

When women approach women they are considered as being 'forward' when we don't we are 'timid'.
I don't understand anymore, i just stopped caring! If a guy approaches me then grand, if he doesn't then tough luck!

The last bank holiday i was at a popular bar/nightclub, i was outside smoking(social smoker) and i overheard an interesting conversation between four lads and a female... Conversation was so interesting i was in stitches laughing, the lads noticed and started chatting with me. They were 4 very good looking lads, 1 is married, 1 is getting married in a few wks and the other two have gf's. We ended up chatting all night, i mean all night... No flirting, just banter... They kept asking me why i am single, i told them the truth.
Men don't approach me because
1. I am black and Nigerian
2. They think black women are aggressive
3. They think i am seeking asylum/want to get married/trap them
4. Some even ask if i can speak English like ffs

I am outgoing, i love soccer, rugby, poker, porn, very interested in current affairs, economy, life, health etc. I probably know more about soccer than they do

Irish men are too shy and have low self confidence, this means that the only try to chat women up when they've had a few too many... Sad but that's my analysis










Just reading that and i could start a PI

LegacyUser

You could have easily posted a topic called 'Why dont women approach men? '

It's amazing how many women assume that rejection doesnt matter to men. Equally it's amazing how many women assume that plenty of men won't admire them if they initiate conversation.

Honestly next time you're out why dont you and your friends do the approaching? Even if it turns out badly then at least it'll give you an insight into why many men are reluctant to do the same thing.

MrStuffins

MIN2511 wrote: »

I am outgoing, i love soccer, rugby, poker, <b>porn</b>,........

If you'd have mentioned this, you might've gotten chatted up

RedXIV

yup, sorry but women have no one to blame for this but other women. I, like every other man have recieved the cold, frosty stare of a woman that couldn't simply say "sorry i have a boyfriend" or "it's kinda a lady's night". I went through a spiteful stage where i spend the night badgering women that did this to me and my friends and loved it. unfortunately for men, in my experience we have about a 1 in 4 chance of getting someone polite enough to chat back when a conversation is initiated.

As said in countless different threads, you should think about approaching guys yourselves. if your friends won't come in town because no one will approach them, thats kinda a waste. just talk to people, i'd be HUGELY suprised if many guys turned them away with the same rudeness they receive

LegacyUser

RedXIV wrote: »

yup, sorry but women have no one to blame for this but other women. I, like every other man have recieved the cold, frosty stare of a woman that couldn't simply say "sorry i have a boyfriend" or "it's kinda a lady's night". I went through a spiteful stage where i spend the night badgering women that did this to me and my friends and loved it. unfortunately for men, in my experience we have about a 1 in 4 chance of getting someone polite enough to chat back when a conversation is initiated.

As said in countless different threads, you should think about approaching guys yourselves. if your friends won't come in town because no one will approach them, thats kinda a waste. just talk to people, i'd be HUGELY suprised if many guys turned them away with the same rudeness they receive

I get pretty bad approach anxiety sometimes and it has nothing to do with how girls act. If I have the courage to approach a good looking girl and she knocks me back it doesn't matter at all if she is rude, or to what degree she blows me out. I'd just laugh about it / tell my mates about it.

My battle with approaching women is IN MY OWN HEAD, it doesn't follow logic, and I'm sure it's the same for alot of men. It's an evolutionary glitch IMO.

Dave!

Why don't women approach men?

MIN2511

Dave! wrote: »

Why don't women approach men?

I have twice and both lads had long term gfs!

A Primal Nut

sparkplug82 wrote: »

Ok, I am in a serious relationship so to be honest I am more asking this question on friends behalf - was out in town with 2 single friends on sat nite and NOT ONE guy approached any of us - ok correction, some did but they were either really drunk or just rude/not gentlemanly.

I've seen a few posts like this from girls and they always say: "Well, sometimes we do get approached but......."

Maybe they weren't drunk or rude? Maybe they were nervous? Got tongue-tied. Or maybe your friends considered them ugly/badly-addressed, etc, so tried to explain it away by saying they were being rude. Perhaps you could provide more of a specific explanation of what happened or maybe give the boys more of a chance, they could of turned out ok. Perhaps they were trying to be funny but you took them the wrong way....happens.

congo_90

As with most men. I've also been slated many times by women. Most recently I had my ego torn to pieces by a group of ladies. I got talking and instantly they found as many insults to say in a minute it'd put a sailor to shame!

These approachable women i'm seeing.. my god i'd start going out to town more now if I see a few more posts! I'm not the best looking person but I'll give it my best

AARRRGH

As others have said, the problem is other women, in particular, Irish women. They have ruined it for you. :pac:

I really am not one of the "Irish women are ****" people who post on this forum, but there is a massive amount of pig ignorant Irish women out there. As a result of this, my friends, and me to an extent, would only approach foreign women. They are always courteous, and realise they should be flattered.

You know, why risk talking an Irish girl when you can approach a friendly foreigner?

The solution to your problem is to talk to the guy you like. Just tell him you like his t-shirt or trainers or whatever and he'll probably make an effort to talk to you. That would work with me.

AARRRGH

MIN2511 wrote: »

1. I am black and Nigerian
2. They think black women are aggressive
3. They think i am seeking asylum/want to get married/trap them
4. Some even ask if i can speak English like ffs

Lots of Irish guys like black women!

RedXIV

approachable wrote: »

I get pretty bad approach anxiety sometimes and it has nothing to do with how girls act. If I have the courage to approach a good looking girl and she knocks me back it doesn't matter at all if she is rude, or to what degree she blows me out. I'd just laugh about it / tell my mates about it.

My battle with approaching women is IN MY OWN HEAD, it doesn't follow logic, and I'm sure it's the same for alot of men. It's an evolutionary glitch IMO.

Evolving from the fact men were getting rebuked maybe?

I understand some people just don't like approaching new people but for a lot of people it's just learning to deal with constant, humiliating rejection. This is where alcohol comes in

O'Coonassa

mikemac wrote: »

A fear of vicious putdowns in front of a girl and all her friends I suppose

They're only girls ffs

MIN2511

AARRRGH wrote: »

Lots of Irish guys like black women!

Do they? Wasn't sure

O'Coonassa

MIN2511 wrote: »

Irish men are too shy and have low self confidence, this means that the only try to chat women up when they've had a few too many... Sad but that's my analysis

You're right. It was European womens that made them like that. I'd say in another 20 years my African mates will be whipped also. All the cheek and charm will be replaced by self doubt. Very sad.

O'Coonassa

MIN2511 wrote: »

Do they? Wasn't sure

West indians and Africans are just fine but Americans are truly awful.

Overheal

RedXIV wrote: »

constant, humiliating rejection.

And forethought. "This one? Yeah. She'll break it off 2 weeks later, leaving me gutted. I'll spend the next month wonder wtf is wrong me at the bottom of a bottle"

Short answer: the same reason as women.

anonymous_joe

I'd say maybe two or three of the eight or so lads I'd be good mates with would ever approach women regularly. And even they go through periods where they lose all faith.

Long story short, most of the time you get talking to a stranger they're a pretty normal person, but a lot of guys have ended up being told to fúck off once too often and don't bother.

LuckyLloyd

MIN2511 wrote: »

Irish men are too shy and have low self confidence, this means that the only try to chat women up when they've had a few too many... Sad but that's my analysis

Yup. There are always exceptions on either side of the coin, but the generalizations in this thread about Irish men lacking the mental fortitude and Irish women lacking the basic politeness are applicable to the majority of people I know / have come across.

As for why this is, well it probably has a huge amount to do with the culture around how kids and teenagers are brought up and schooled in this country.

Jigsaw

I got approached recently in a bar but the girl in question had an arse like two pillows in a bin bag and she was quite clearly a boyfriend hunter. I'm no oil painting but what is the point in pursuing anything in that situation? There has to be some sort of sexual attraction. I could've went home and rid the hole clean off her but then I would've been asked to go for coffee and curtain shopping the next day. Not cool.

LegacyUser

Becuase we live in a feminist society in which females are repugnant in character and males have been programmed to be sexually passive.

Feminist: "Gender roles are entirely cultural."

No kidding, now welcome to the feminist order. And don't complain about it, cause you asked for it!

LegacyUser

Maybe you're looking in the wrong places for men.

Complaining you can't find a gentleman/soberman in a bar/nightclub is akin to complaining you can't find a straight guy in The George.

MIN2511

LuckyLloyd wrote: »

Yup. There are always exceptions on either side of the coin, but the generalizations in this thread about Irish men lacking the mental fortitude and Irish women lacking the basic politeness are applicable to the majority of people I know / have come across.

As for why this is, well it probably has a huge amount to do with the culture around how kids and teenagers are brought up and schooled in this country.

I understand most of this but at the end of the day i don't see why it is still an issue. There are loads of single, nice, easy going people who just want to have fun, live and let live. It's not like it's Rock science or anything...

Jigsaw wrote: »

I got approached recently in a bar but the girl in question had an arse like two pillows in a bin bag and she was quite clearly a boyfriend hunter.

God love the girl for coming up to you!
What's the 'boyfreind' hunter?

I'm no oil painting but what is the point in pursuing anything in that situation?

At least you know that you are 'no oil painting' but does a guy have to be an oil painting for a girl to chat him up?
Pursuing anything? This sounds like low self esteem to me, fair enough if you are not looking to meet someone or score someone on a night out but not everyone goes out with that plan in mind. If she was your 'stereotypical' girl would you have been impressed?

There has to be some sort of sexual attraction. I could've went home and rid the hole clean off her but then I would've been asked to go for coffee and curtain shopping the next day. Not cool.

Lucky her then!! Imagine if she took you home and the 'roide' was appalling:eek:
btw, what's it with men who think all women want to do is go for coffee/curtain shopping(not like there is anything wrong with that) but most men assume we want diamond rings etc

Dude, i am not picking on you per se. I am picking on your attitude, it's situations like this that also put women down...

Life is a biatch! The earlier we cop on that its not about Romeo and Juliet, the better we will be at accepting who we are

gimme5minutes

As everyone else has said, its because Irish women are renowned for having a very high opinion of themselves and won't even be civil to a guy that approaches them if they are not interested. Alot of it is down to materialistic vibe that came with the Celtic Tiger.

It's ironic because if you go abroad and see the quality of the women on the continent who are in great shape and beautiful and yet they don't think they are better than anyone else and will happily chat away even if they are not interested. Where here in Ireland where we have drawn the short-straw looks-wise with the women, with the average irish women these days carrying a fair few extra pounds and caked in too much make-up, yet they think they are god's gift to men and are above 95% of men that approach them. The top 5% of women-looks wise in Ireland would just be the average on the continent.

enda1

veryangryman wrote: »

+1

Was going to post pretty much exact same thing.

I think the most fearful thing men have of splitting up with someone is the fear of having to go through all that god forsaken effort just to find someone who wont put you down when you approach them. Its why girls enjoy the singles life more. Just sit back, look pretty, have a cocktail and the guys will flock over in time. If they dont, just give a subtle hint and theyll still flock over.

On the other hand...

I think that the satisfaction of the chase/catch which men get is far more of a thrill than for the woman who knows whether this is all going to lead somewhere because (lets face it), she decided how far it goes from the nightclub to the nookie. Which leads them to feel as inadequate as a bunch of Millwall fans girlfriends

Millwall, Millwall, you're all really dreadful, and all your girlfriends are unfulfilled and alienated.

If I could give you 2 thumbs up I would and both would be for the Black Books quote !!

LegacyUser

gimme5minutes wrote: »

Where here in Ireland where we have drawn the short-straw looks-wise with the women, with the average irish women these days carrying a fair few extra pounds and caked in too much make-up, yet they think they are god's gift to men and are above 95% of men that approach them. The top 5% of women-looks wise in Ireland would just be the average on the continent.

Funny attitudes on this thread. Men complain that Irish women are too judgemental, shallow and ignorant. And then turn men around and behave in the same way towards Irish women.

Many would say that in Ireland we've draw short-straw looks-wise with the men too. But it doesnt seem to stop them thinking they are god's gift either.

Jigsaw wrote: »

I got approached recently in a bar but the girl in question had an arse like two pillows in a bin bag and she was quite clearly a boyfriend hunter.

Sadly it seems that it isnt just Irish women who have a high opinion of themselves.

RossFixxxed

Maybe they:

Aren't attracted to you
Are shy
Are already taken
Are not on the pull that night


But look I think guys are getting sick of an increasing attitude in relationships. I remember asking for a light one night (and I wasn't on the pull, I'm taken thanks) and got a filthy look up and down. Light my smoke and said 'thanks, enjoy your night'. And left, as I'm walking away I get 'well it will be now that you're gone. pathetic.' I mean if I was single that'd be a fair stab. There is a real attitude problem emerging and I think guys are turning the tide a bit. It's like the 'I hate everyone' thread. If you act like that you're gonna be single and us guys are not gonna bother.

Go say hi yourself, if you like someone don't sit there staring psychically willing them over. And do it before everyone gets drunk and disgruntled!
R

lisamuire

i don't think all irish women r judgemental, if i go to a bar or club, nd a guy comes over to me, i'd talk to him watever he luked like, just because u get involved in a conversation don't mean u av 2 sleep wit the guy......

Porkpie

Why don't men approach women? Maybe it's because we're tired of getting shot down most of the time. And not only are we getting rejected, but we often have to deal with insulting behaviour too. My mate was telling me recently that this girl was giving him the eye all night, when he went over to say hello she just turned away from him and completely ignored him! It's behaviour like this that makes it so difficult for us to differentiate between the nice girls and the b!tches.

Why don't women approach men? It's 2009 isn't it? Women seem to have the upper hand in this game after all. Yes, some guys are idiots, but I guarantee most will be at least polite and courteous if you are.

TheInquisitor

sparkplug82 wrote: »

Ok, I am in a serious relationship so to be honest I am more asking this question on friends behalf - was out in town with 2 single friends on sat nite and NOT ONE guy approached any of us - ok correction, some did but they were either really drunk or just rude/not gentlemanly.

Now I know what ye are thinking - eh you girls are obviously total mingers and thats why no one tried to chat your mates up. But i am being genuinely unbiased here when i say that my friends are really pretty, normal, well dressed (not slutty or nerdy - just nice!) and more importantly, really nice girls who would not be b*tchy to a guy even if they were approached.

can anyone shed any light on this? what is it with men that they will not walk up to a girl and be like "hi, im john, what is your name" in a really genuine way? i know it must be intimidating for a guy but come on, a girl would so admire someone who did that.....any info/revelations would be hugely appreciated - i think my friends have vowed never to venture into town ever again!

Well i am the shyest man ever. I only feel comfortable talking to female friends of mine. Also why didn't your friends go up to any guys???

Lu Tze

MIN2511 wrote: »

It's not like it's Rock science or anything...

Thats called Geology

On topic though, as everybody has pretty much said, its not exactly encouraging in being shot down in an abusive manner, for either gender, there is only a certain amount of times before you stop trying altogther

coadyj

Ill tell you exactly why, well from my experience.

Im in a club and I see a pretty girl or a group of girl who I think are pretty. To be honest Im deadly at this, I go straight over and chat up the whole group and then focus my attention on the one I like, now of course sometimes I get shot down, and sometimes the boyfriend card gets played, but 80% of the time I act very nice and gentlemanly and everything works great, only problem is, nowadays the gentleman get put in the potential boyfriend category in the woman's mind, so I would ask for a number, next thing you know Im on a date, have a lovely meal but I kinda realise that I'm not as attracted to the woman as I might have though, but Ive think, well Ive come this far, I might as well get a bit of sex out of the it. So date 2 or 3 comes along and you have sex. Now the woman thinks wow, Im sorted I basically have a new bf, the problem is Im not thinking like this way, a month or so passes and now its time to have the break up chat, this is when the venom comes out from the woman, how can you do this to me etc. all this from trying to chat up a woman in a gentlemanly manner.

Now consider the guy who just goes up to women, act slightly arrogant, but kinda sexy too, well he get to go home with the woman on the first night does the dirty deed and never has to deal with them again. If women were more interested in having a little fun and not trying to get into a relationship then maybe guys wouldn't have such approach anxiety.

And at all they guy here who say women should approach men, ehh why dont you go to legs or lillys, both of these clubs are full of women who approach me, but they all try to bat way out of their league

Rics

I've not been single too long, not long out of a 7 year relationship.
I think that Irish girls are in general less approachable than most others.
Then again, it could be the language barrier that allows me to chat more freely to foreign women haha!
I think it's because sometimes you might go to talk to an Irish girl and they unleash the attitude on you. I don't understand why so many are like this?!
I think it makes the likes of myself nervous to talk to them again if you know what I mean.

speedboatchase

I think irish blokes should adapt and change their approach, if she doesnt wanna give you the time of day HER loss, don't sweat it. Also change up how you approach, if you present yourself in the exact same way as everyone else you'll get that same response. I do hate that attitude regarding simple things though like asking about cocktails, nearby bars, a light etc - inexcusable

luckat

The idea that men don't approach women makes me gawp. Try going out in the street with the slightest whiff of oestregen off you and you'll have to beat the effers off you with a stick.

Eve_Dublin

Perhaps the reason that foreign women are more receptive to Irish men's advances are because they're either here on their holidays or else they haven't been here long enough to become jaded and bored by the drunken, messy approach ALOT of Irish men use or perhaps you're still a novelty to them...plus you can get away with the sh**te talk and they'll find it more charming whereas we can see right through it. We're more wisened up to you at this stage, lads. Us women can smell desperation and there's nothing attractive about a man who has to get completely baloobas before he approaches a girl or the last minute scramble for a bit of how's your father at the end of the night. Put yourself in our shoes...we've had a whole adulthood of this type of approach and it's getting old. Can you imagine having to put up with this again and again and again every bloody weekend? A little tip for Irish men: go easy on the gargle before you chat up a girl in a pub, it's quite simple really.

Saying all that, i'm sorry some of you have had such terrible experiences with Irish women but where in God's name are you drinking? I never come across people like that where I frequent. Nobody has a right to treat anyone that way and myself and any female friends would never treat a man like that, even if we weren't interested. These women are not worth your time but they don't make up the majority, I promise.

LegacyUser

I saw this thread and I was shocked to find out it wasn't just me who thought perhaps everyman in Dublin had stopped hitting on women. I'm glad to find out it isn't just me. I'm not completely unattractive, and I understand after being insulted/belittled by a women would put you off starting a conversation. but please keep in mind thats all it is, a conversation!

So men please be a lil braver and say hi.. most of us aren't ball-breakers, well not unless you ask nicely .

Overheal

Pubs and Clubs are Dead imo. Youll meet the same fecking attitudes in there. Even if the right attitude is there, theres too much noise and not enough signal. A minefield of put-downs. Thats right, I lost my emotive right-leg in 'Nam (also known as Rag Week '09).

Speed dating. I have to try speed dating sometime. At least on dating sites and at speed dating places you get rid of the group mentality (crowd of girls looking to gang up on us brave soldiers) and the Sorry Im Takens.

irish_bob

some have commented that irish women have a very high opinion of themselves , im not sure this is true , in fact i think the opposite is the case and a lot of them are very insecure which might explain why so many of them are so hostile to recieving compliments , when overseas if you pay a woman a compliment , the reaction is in my experience always possitive , with irish women , the reaction is usally one of , this guy is a sleaze or a sap