whats the best/worst chat up lines

That_Guy

af_thefragile wrote: »

Aah the classic!!
Never fails!


Anyway, some nerdy ones:

"If you were DNA and I was Helicase then when we'ld meet I could unzip you genes!"

"I wish you are derived cuz when we integrate I can lay tangent to your curves"



some awful ones:

"Girl I bet you're a parking ticket cuz you've got fine written all over you!!"

"Girl, I wanna drink your bathwater"

"I can save you on your car insurance!!"

"You'll do".

That was just confusing.

laura.

how about "i wanna wear your skin to my birthday", and if it doesn't work punch her in the ovary and rob her drink

zuroph

Are you an angel? cos i've got an erection.

whats the difference between a ferrari and an erection? I dont have a ferrari.

honeymonster

"Get in the van!" is a personal favourite

johnnyskeleton

Hell doll, is this kid boring you? Come talk to me, I'm from another planet.

sub-x

Heres my mobile,ring your mam and tell her you won't be home.

Lia_lia

Screw me if I'm wrong, but is your name John? :rolleyes:

scudster

Heres a few ive used.
Standing across a dance floor from a girl and when she looked over at me, I started to stroke my chin and looked her up and down. Never said a word to her. Worked a treat.

The not so successful one was to a gorgeous lookin girl wearin a skin tight short dress. "are you wearing that dress or is it painted on?" schmood operator ar wha?

flying _squirl

johnnyskeleton wrote: »

Hell doll, is this kid boring you? Come talk to me, I'm from another planet.

"... its true, wanna see my spaceship?"

RVD420

Are you from the Caribbean? Cos Jamaican me crazy!

deisedude

Do you like cheese? Cos i'm an easy single!

Wow are those your breasts or are there two midgets under your top?

The Master

"Do you like Jewellery?"

"Yeah?"

" Well suck my cock it's a gem"

battser

How's your @rse for lovebites....

One that worked for me in fireworks years ago on a college night which worked a treat

"You are a fcukin cracker Im defo gonna get a bit of that later. She smiled and grabbed me on the Dancefloor about an hour later!!!

3qsmavrod5twfe

"147 acres, all pasture" (works with the country crowd*)

"Have you any Irish in you? Would you like some?" (works with the foreigners*)


*May be complete bullshít

Mr. CooL ICE

Mate of mine had the bluntest line ever:

"Do you want to have sex with me"

If she said no, he would move onto the next group of girls. Strangely enough, it worked 9/10 times he went on the pull

CHD

Lad: Your definetly gonna have sex later

Girl: How do you know that?

Lads: Im bigger than you, and Im stronger than you.


Works everytime

zuroph

CHD wrote: »

Lad: Your definetly gonna have sex later

Girl: How do you know that?

Lads: Im bigger than you, and Im stronger than you.


Works everytime

lol, similar,

Ever had sex in a dark alley?
well you're about to...

Capt'n Midnight

Would there be any resistance if I asked to take you ohm?

I love the way you smell so different from my dad.

Would kissing you increase global warming and damage the Arctic irreversibly, or is it just enough to break the ice?


I've had my ion you.

I don't wish to brag, but in several parallel universes I invented the internet, warned the world about global warming, ran for president and won the Nobel peace prize.


Hello, I've just taken part in the clinical trial of a new drug to help memory loss; could you tell me, do I come here often?

Er... hello... um... er. Oh look! Our shoes have similar spectral characteristics.

Meiosis?

LoanShark

A guy I know of....

"Yes Girls,Any Sex?"

here.from.day.1

zuroph wrote: »

lol, similar,

Ever had sex in a dark alley?
well you're about to...

You mean "romantic" alley!

martyf84

Guy: Can i smell ur fanny?
Girl: No.
Guy: Must be your feet then!

Not a successful one.

melekalikimaka

Rented Mule wrote: »

You won't be disappointed.

I've eaten more pussy than cervical cancer.

i read that, went out and gor exceedingly dunk and used it on a girl... seemingly her boyfriend had to hold her back...he liked it, she didn't....my friend threw me in a taxi shortly after disgusted

DubMedic

Anyone who has ever seen Hannibal :

'' Say , are you a size 14?''

Not really a chat up line, but it worked for Buffalo Bill :rolleyes:

Jesus Wept

Are your nipples pink or brown?

brummytom

Let's not turn this rape into a murder


If I toss this coin, what are the chances of me getting head?

billyhead

You'll Do


Me- The name's bond

Her- James Bond?

Me- No, Unibond, i'm gonna fill your crack


"your lucky, i've decided to go ugly early"
and Finally
Do you work in subway?

cause you've just gave me a foot long.

5318008!

Hi, would you like to take my cock out on a test-drive?

Shanotheslayer

I find it unfair that everynight your toothbrush gets to go in your mouth and not somthing of mine

irish_bob

LordChessington wrote: »

Mate of mine had the bluntest line ever:

"Do you want to have sex with me"

If she said no, he would move onto the next group of girls. Strangely enough, it worked 9/10 times he went on the pull

he didnt have that kind of success rate in this country , thats for sure , somewhere like essex ,perhaps

no chat up lines are the best in this country as irish women in general are so hostile to a wooing

Sharpshooter

irish_bob wrote: »

no chat up lines are the best in this country as irish women in general are so hostile to a wooing

After reading this thread,is it any fcuking wonder?