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General Vision & Viewpoint
Billy Elliot and Lamb
Both Billy Elliot and Lamb contain messages of pessimism and optimism. They evoke strong emotion in the reader as the story unfolds. Both texts open with a feeling of loss, pessimism and hopelessness.
Our introduction to the world of Billy Elliot begins with a scene of his preparing breakfast for himself and his grandmother....
not everything can go according to plan, it brings us to reality and reminds us of those less fortunate.
I'm only familiar with Billy Elliot, but I'll give this a shot! First of all, this is very good and very promising, I don't mean to sound like a critical b**** but I've a few suggestions below, take them or leave them!
- This is nearly 1700 words! Spend time editing it down to 1200, which is all you'll have time for in the exam and is the recommended essay length for the comparative. You've just written a general essay for the mode of V&V. Maybe do a question from the past papers and practise applying your learnt-off essay to the question given. Just be sure to answer what you're asked and to constantly refer back to the question.
- Begin by answering Q. given and saying you are going to answer the question under the v&v mode with the following texts: the film Billy Elliot, directed by Stephen Daldry and Lamb by _______. You need to give the details of who wrote/directed it!
- You made a good point about the need for escape in paragraphs 4/5, maybe elaborate on this by discussing that dancing is a metaphor for hope in BE, this contrasts the total hopelessness of Lamb (not familiar with this text so that might be wrong!), Billy Elliot is like a modern day fairytale etc
- I would also reference the ''key moment'' of Billy's audition and quote it too, where he is asked to describe what dancing feels like for him. It would add a nice touch!
- You mention that Michael is a good friend to Billy, maybe expand on this further and refer to scenes such as the kiss on the cheek and the snow scene
- You made a very nice point in paragraph 8 about the importance of the individual!
- I would move paragraph 9 up to the fourth/fifth paragraphs as they are also talking about escape, it might make the essay flow better
- You made an interesting point about a lack of respect for the arts, you could expand on this and talk about the pessimism of Everington as everybody is put in a box, stereotyping etc. like when the piano man tells Billy ''You look like a right wanker to me son'' when he's dancing, but how ultimately Jackie and Tony look past the stereotypes and people accept that he is a dancer and doesn't have to be gay. Also, Billy doesn't judge Michael for being gay and knows that they can be friends, this shows optimism as children are innocent, hopeful, non judgmental so the film becomes more optimistic as it progresses
- You made a good point about how Jackie begins doing everything he can, even crossing the picket line etc. to help Billy realise his dreams. I'd tie that back to the mode of V&V maybe, and stress how the film starts becoming more optimistic (in contrast to Lamb?) and refer back to the question
- I'd throw in a few more quotes throughout the essay, you need to be able to reference the points you're making and show that you've studied the literature etc. it looks impressive to an examiner. The method of making a point, explaining it, giving an example and a quote and then comparing/contrasting it to the other text is a good formula to constantly keep in the back of your mind!
- If you could find a suitable quote from either Lamb or Billy Elliot to open and conclude your essays on it would look impressive!
- It would also be a nice touch to try and give a personal response, just every so often when you're giving an example say something like ''This was one of my favourite shots in the film as it exemplified the point that _____'' or ''It allowed me to understand that _________''
Hope that this is of some help to you, good luck!0 -
Victoria, I think your Kavanagh essay is very good but its too long, being completely honest. You'd struggle to get it all down in an exam I think, but If you can, fairplay and you deserve an excellent grade but to make it easier for yourself, narrow it down a bit. 0
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Another one of my essays, this discussed the vision of evil presented by Shakespeare in Macbeth let me know what you think
“In Macbeth, Shakespeare presents us with a powerful vision of Evil”
In Shakespeare’s darkest of tragedies, ‘Macbeth’ we as an audience are undoubtedly presented with a strong and morally ignorant vision of evil. In appreciation of this opinion we must understand the key premise of evil at its most basic. Evil is indeed the very opposite of humanity, an unnatural force with the simple aim of destruction. It is a force that originates in the human heart at the darkest of times. This, in my opinion is the powerful vision presented to us in the untimely drama, ‘Macbeth’. The very evil nature of the drama can be seen in The Witches with most vigour, yet it is clear the unnatural force fuels the actions of Macbeth and Lady Macbeth also. However, I believe this battle is between two very distinct sides as the power of good is also prevalent throughout this story. These forces are personified in the good nature of a variety of characters such as Macduff, Malcolm and King Edward. These characters add another dimension to the stage as we witness the ever present saga between good and evil play out.
Imagery is a key aspect in Shakespeare’s presentation of evil. We see a variety of types of imagery used to portray this. This includes blood imagery and animal imagery, aswell as light and darkness imagery. The use of blood imagery is at its most predominant in Act 2 Scene 2 in the prelude to the death of Duncan, “And on thy blade and dudgeon gouts of blood”. The use of blood imagery throughout the play reminds the audience of the fatal actions of the antagonist, Macbeth, emphasising the sheer evil at the heart of the drama. Animal imagery is used throughout the drama as a symbol of evil. Lady Macbeth refers to animal imagery in a diverse range of situations as she manipulates the will of her “dearest partner in greatness”, Macbeth “Act like the innocent flower, but be the serpent undern’t”. Animal imagery is used most often throughout the drama to portray evil doings. I feel the use of imagery is essential in allowing the audience to connect on familiar grounds to unfamiliar situations, whilst it also acts as medium for a powerful vision of evil to be presented to us.
At the time the play ‘Macbeth’ was initially performed around 1606, creatures such as witches with supernatural abilities were wildly believed in. Witchcraft, a crime punishable by death was outlawed and the abilities of these hags were feared far and wide. For this reason it is clear that the use of these unearthly beings by Shakespeare to portray evil was central in the entertainment of his audience, and more so in the Middle Ages than now presented a horrific and powerful vision of Evil. The initial introduction to the witches in Act 1 Scene 1 set a wicked atmosphere right from the outset, I feel this is very effective in portraying an evil vision to the audience. I also think that the horrid appearance of these ‘hags’ is a frightening image that hooks the interest of the audience straight away. In the drama, the witches are undoubtedly a catalyst to the unravelling of the central plot. These “instruments of darkness” are undeniably corrupt with a supernatural, evil nature, and in my opinion lie at the core of evil in the tale of ‘Macbeth’. It is clear that the witches act as malevolent temptresses playing on Macbeth’s fatal flaw, his “vaulting ambition”, alluring the glory of King before him, “All hail, Macbeth, that shalt be king hereafter!”. They play a prominent role in the discussions of the theme appearance vs. reality, as they speak in riddles holding double meaning, “Fair is foul and foul is fair. Hover through the fog and filthy air”. The Witches’ actions, use of short sentences and repetition of numbers 3, 6 and 9 exemplifies there supernatural persona, this in my opinion helps present the audience with a spooky and powerful vision of evil.
In relation to the question of evil, a key character that must be addressed is Macbeth’s loyal and ruthlessly ambitious next of kin, Lady Macbeth. In my opinion the character of Lady Macbeth portrays the greatest desire for evil in hope of achieving the highest glory – Macbeth’s kingship. In Lady Macbeth’s first appearance (Act 1 Scene 5) we see the Queen to be call on evil spirits, “unsex me here and fill me from crown to toe top full of direst cruelty!”. Although this illustrates her actions were influenced by unnatural powers, she called the evil upon herself to give her the will to commit the most unforgivable crimes. We soon realise that Lady Macbeth holds an evil persona through and through, acting compassionate in no act, “I have given suck and no how tender tis to love the babe that milks me, I would while it was smiling in my face, have plucked my nipple from his boneless gums and dashed the brains out”, this exemplifies her ruthless nature. We see with the calling of the evil spirits upon her that Lady Macbeth transforms into an almost witch like character. Yet after she goads Macbeth to commit regicide, she later suffers pangs of guilt for her involvement in the crime. Lady Macbeth becomes haunted, I feel this portrays the inability of a human soul to deal with such guilt. In the end it is evident that no power good or evil can save her from herself, can save Lady Macbeth from her guilt, “what’s done cannot be undone”. In the end, she is the crux of her own downfall. This is clear in her inability to sleep no more, her inability to be at peace, “here's the smell of the blood still: all the perfumes of Arabia will not sweeten this little hand”. The sheer evil of Lady Macbeth in my opinion portrays at the highest order the powerful vision of evil presented to us in the drama, ‘Macbeth’.
More than any character in the drama, I feel that Macbeth undergoes the greatest of transitions. We see in the beginning a brave and heroic soldier, “valiant cousin, worthy gentlemen”. Macbeth is praised for his noble stature by all. Yet it is clear that this praised noble suffered from one untimely fatal flaw, his intoxicating, vaulting ambition, “I have no spur... but only vaulting ambition, which o'erleaps itself, and falls on th'other side”. This fatal ambition is the key element in the destruction of a great character. It is clear that in his quest of moral destruction Macbeth did not travel alone, aided most greatly by the witches, their alluring persona originally plant the evil thoughts of regicide at its most basic. Yet, we see the witches did not put a dagger in his hand, nor force him into hiring a hoard of murderers to do his bidding, the actions of Macbeth were of his own purpose, even more and more as the drama develops. In the beginning it is evident Macbeth as well as his wife greatly regret the crime of killing Duncan, “Wake Duncan with thy knocking. I would thou couldst”. Yet this changes dramatically as Macbeth begins to do murder without the knowledge of his “dearest partner in greatness”, Lady Macbeth, “be innocent of the knowledge dearest chuck until thou applaud the deed”. Until, eventually we see Macbeth changing into a heartless murderer in killing Macduff’s innocent wife and children without reason, “From this moment, the very firstlings of my heart shall be the firstlings of my hand”. In this we realise Macbeth is a multi dimensional character who has undergone a great transformation. As the drama drives to a tragic conclusion, Macbeth’s fate becomes clear. Although bulging of false confidence - thanks to the Three Witches apparitions, “none of women born shall harm Macbeth” - we see our antagonist come to the realisation of his fate as he suffers greatly in the end at the hands of Macduff. As in the death of Lady Macbeth, this illustrates the consequences of his evil doings. In my opinion it is through the actions of Macbeth that Shakespeare presents us with a powerful vision of Evil.
Throughout the drama, we are overcome with a constant air of darkness and evil, it isn’t until Act 4 Scene 3 we see the forces of good rise up together. In this scene we see Macduff approach Malcolm in the English court, in hope of a rebellion. At first his plea goes unanswered, as Malcolm tests the reliability of Macduff as an ally. However in the end his endeavours prove good as the duo unite to bring down the tyrant that is Macbeth. These forces are led by the morally good and brave Macduff. Seen throughout the drama as a force of good, constantly in rebellion against the power of Macbeth, Macduff is the epitome of good in the drama. His will to prevail over evil can be seen as a complete juxtaposition to the evil doings of Macbeth, his wife and the witches. Because of the benevolent strengths of Macduff and Malcolm, as well as King Duncan, Edward the Confessor and Siward, the deeds of Macbeth are undermined even more so. For this reason I feel the contrast between good and evil, emphasises the vision of evil Shakespeare presents to us.
In the end it is clear that the evil powers of Macbeth and Lady Macbeth suffer the greatest, due to their sheer disregard for humanity, due to their damaged souls. It is evident that those who deserved it the most paid with their lives. In this we see that Shakespeare’s vision of evil can be compromised from a variety of factors, the acts of Macbeth, Lady Macbeth aswell as the witches and the imagery used to present these. However in this appraisable vision of Evil presented to us, we realise the instigators of the storyline, the catalyst to the plot go unscathed, the weird sisters, the evil hags, the three Witches become immune from retribution, free from punishment. In my opinion this is a deliberate message that is conveyed by Shakespeare; the forces of evil are ever present, always to be fought against yet never vanquished. In my opinion this is the true moral of a timely tale, which remains in the minds and the hearts of all that hear it. It rings true a famous statement of the Irish political philosopher, Edmund Burke, “All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing”. It is with this understanding of Shakespeare’s vision of evil we come to appreciate the story of ‘Macbeth’ as much today as in 1606.
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cottonpencil wrote: »So i wrote this short story for the English Composition question and would love some feedback. Its called, "Sisters"
It was nearing 5am when Sammy came into my room. Bounced in my bed and shrieked at me in a delightful tone to wake up.
“It’s today! It’s finally here, wake up Kim!” she screamed again and again, until I eventually wiped the sleep from my eyes and kicked my brightly stripped quilt to the floor.
This sort of excitement was unheard of from my shy and fragile sister (excluding Christmas and the occasional birthday). Her thinned blond hair swept untidily across her this face just as the light from outside my bedroom window caused her bright blue eyes to glint, in an angel-like fashion. Sammy was already fully-clothed and from the looks of it had been for many hours. Before I had the chance to sit up fully, Sammy was out the door again bounding off, happy to wake the whole street if she could. I smiled to myself as I thought what good this trip had done for my sickly darling sister in such a short space of time.
I remember the despair and heartbreak evident on my mother’s face, the fear visible in my dad’s eyes and the hopelessness that day two years ago when Sammy was diagnosed. She was four years of age at the time, a happy bright young thing whose life was set on a timer when the kind doctor told us she had an incurable and malignant form of Leukaemia. That day not only did the life of my sister get turned upside down but our lives as a family were changed forevermore. However it wasn’t until that day I learned the meaning of the proverb ‘Every cloud has a silver lining’, as it was that day we met the wonderful people from the ‘Make a Wish Foundation’. On that day, Sam was asked what she wished for more than anything in the world. But all my amazing, little Sammy wanted was to make Mummy, Daddy and Kimmy happy again.
Making our way out the front door it was clear Sammy’s dream was coming through, as she bounced her way out the main gate looking to any passer-by like a smiley and healthy little girl. For once our whole family was happy and giddy with excitement thanks to our little gem. Dad lifted all our luggage into the back of the Fiesta. The fun was had the night before, as Sam and I packed and unpacked toys and hair bobbins, bright swimsuits and pink shorts finally making everything fit. A smell of fresh cut grass was in the air from the night before just as the sun decided to rise. We eventually were all bundled into the two-door, five-seater and were ready to head to the airport for our big family adventure.
Sammy was still hopping around the back of the car, a grin plastered across her face from ear to ear almost permanently at this stage. As the engine began to rumble I buckled her in tightly, there was only one seatbelt because of the rough and tumble down through the years, so I gave Sam priority as always. Soon enough, Mom gad pulled out the drive way and images of our semi detached modest little house were only fond memories. It was just dawn as we made our way onto the moterway. Cars with bright lights sped all around us, people with generic lives doing what they always did at this time in the morning, the telephone in one hand steering wheel in another balancing a breakfast bagel on the way to work, ignorant of the joy on spread on Sammy’s face as she stared out into the spinning world around us. I could hear the birds singing as Dad commented on what a beautiful morning it was. Everything was just right. I turned to Sam once more, I grabbed her little fingers and gave her a reassuring grin.
“I will always be here for you sis, whatever happens” I muttered.
“I love you too, Kimmy” she said with a sparkle in her eye.
It was only when I looked over Sammy’s shoulder in an embrace that I saw it coming. A silver grey truck was speeding in our direction at the intersection, but why wasn’t stopping? The traffic lights signalled red to stop. Why was it still coming towards us. It was then I felt the initial collision and my whole world began to spin in slow motion. I could hear the squeal of the tires, an airbag exploding, the connection of the construction truck and our small family car, but it was the scream of my six year old little darling sister that drowned out the rest. I began to feel my nostrils fill with an intoxicating burning scent, whilst the salty taste of blood ambled in my mouth. Through the corner of my eye, I saw fragile bodies being tossed like rag dolls throughout the vehicle as stray objects flew through the air. But all I could really sense was Sammy there beside me, her hand grasping mine until there was nothing...
“Wake up Kim! Please Kimmy, wake up!” Sammy’s voice pleaded with me. It was all I could hear as I was shot forward into a tunnel of light. A sense of nothingness enclosed me as I floated slowly upwards. It was only then I could see, I was looking down from the ceiling at a crowd of people huddled around a hospital bed. Please, don’t let it be Sammy. Please not my little sis, these were the thoughts that consumed me. Suddenly the voice of a strong yet concerned doctor filled the room.
“I’m afraid we may have to pull the plug” he said in a distressed tone. “Her injuries are too severe, the lack of a seatbelt caused her to bound forward, damaging her spinal cord. There is very little we can do”.
It was my mother’s cry that drowned the end of his sentence out. And as she turned to look for support in my father, I could with relief see Sam, not lying motionless on a hospital bed, I thought with relief but bending down pleading with her sister to wake up. With all my heart I urged to descend and wipe the tears from my sickly sibling but my body simply floated, unwilling to move.
As everything filled with darkness once more, I knew, my fate wasn’t to live my life on earth with my darling sister. But to look down on Sammy from heaven, as her Guardian Angel.
Just saw the 'short story' at the beginning, then saw you writing ''I'' .. My teacher ALWAYS recommends us NOT to use first person in the short stories. Instead you could use 3rd person maybe. She warns us of this as many people opt for the short story option and the sense of the ''I'' makes the story feel personal, thus creating a personal essay/story. This would bring you down hugely in the Purpose mark. That's just a tip though, there are people that can do short stories great in first person! 0 -
Leaving Cert Student wrote: »
I included a background first paragraph? Assumed that was all required, thanks though, I will remember in future...
I'm not sure if it's a definite requirement but it's what we were always told. Articles are often broken up into sub-headings in magazines and newspapers so it's an idea to look in to it if your looking for full marks. Very good tone throughout though I have to say, if you did that on the spot it's done very well 0 -
I'm not sure if it's a definite requirement but it's what we were always told. Articles are often broken up into sub-headings in magazines and newspapers so it's an idea to look in to it if your looking for full marks. Very good tone throughout though I have to say, if you did that on the spot it's done very well
Cheers did it for the Christmas exam off the cuff alright... don't want to grow attached to it as I fear I could try and mimic it in the real thing then even if a title isn't suitable though I will more than likely be doing the article!0 -
Just saw the 'short story' at the beginning, then saw you writing ''I'' .. My teacher ALWAYS recommends us NOT to use first person in the short stories. Instead you could use 3rd person maybe. She warns us of this as many people opt for the short story option and the sense of the ''I'' makes the story feel personal, thus creating a personal essay/story. This would bring you down hugely in the Purpose mark. That's just a tip though, there are people that can do short stories great in first person!
I agree with this completely. Narrating a story in the first person tends to result in a much more personal, emotional tone. Avoid it if possible.0 -
Leaving Cert Student wrote: »
Cheers did it for the Christmas exam off the cuff alright... don't want to grow attached to it as I fear I could try and mimic it in the real thing then even if a title isn't suitable though I will more than likely be doing the article!
The same as myself, I can spit out an article on the spot much easier than trying to plan a short story. I'm okay with personal essays and speeches but articles are definitely my first choice. As long as a decent title comes up anyway 0 -
The same as myself, I can spit out an article on the spot much easier than trying to plan a short story. I'm okay with personal essays and speeches but articles are definitely my first choice. As long as a decent title comes up anyway
Yep any personal essay/article of remote potential and I am on it!0 -
Just saw the 'short story' at the beginning, then saw you writing ''I'' .. My teacher ALWAYS recommends us NOT to use first person in the short stories. Instead you could use 3rd person maybe. She warns us of this as many people opt for the short story option and the sense of the ''I'' makes the story feel personal, thus creating a personal essay/story. This would bring you down hugely in the Purpose mark. That's just a tip though, there are people that can do short stories great in first person!
Thanks for the feedback might try editing it.. What did you think of the story itself? 0 -
cottonpencil wrote: »Thanks for the feedback might try editing it.. What did you think of the story itself?
I really liked it. Interesting, original and great use of language. 0 -
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