Body Image

pikachucheeks

Hi everyone,
Not sure how many of you managed to catch Midday on TV3 today, but the all-female panel spent most of the show discussing body image,their perceptions of themselves when they look in the mirror and the whole world of dieting, weight loss etc...

One of the guests, Fiona Looney was really honest about it - She admitted to weighing herself up to three times a day and basically said while she could accept she wasn't overweight, she was obsessed with her appearance and asking her not to monitor her weight was like asking her "not to breathe"

So, my question is, when you look in the mirror, what do you see? Are you happy with yourself, or do you see room for improvement? Do you diet, or are you content to be the way you are?

Your thoughts and comments please!

LadyE

I have a distorted look of my body, which I'm sure most girls can relate to.

I know I'm not fat, but I do have fat days. Actually one week of a month would be a fat week..this would be regardless of my weight tho. When I was a size 4 I still had a fat week, that hasn't changed when I became an 8.

Ive never dieted, but Ive done the "I'm soooo going on a diet tomorrow", and if I look in the mirror I sometimes see (really) fat legs/head/tummy and Ive been upset...Ive always regarded that as normal, because I know the next week I wont care and it hasn't given me an unhealthy relationship with food.

So basically, 75% of the time Im happy, but 25% of the time I could list my body flaws over an A4 notepad.

skywards

I've come to accept the fact that I probably have hay in my hair and I'm not the prettiest girl on the planet. I don't think I'm fat, and I don't think I'm super thin either. I'm happy with myself. I don't care if other people don't like me or how I look, at the end of the day its only my opinion that matters to me..

pikachucheeks

I used to have a negative view of my body - I was very self conscious.
I still am, at times - everyone has bad days. But in general, I accept me for me.

I looked in the mirror earlier and I'm happy to say all my thoughts were positive - which makes a change!

I've been making a conscious effort to get fitter this summer and in the past few weeks, I've become happier with my appearance, definitely!

I know I'm not perfect, but at this point in my life, I feel I have a healthy attitude towards myself which I'm thankful for, given all the media pressures and constant reminders of size 0, 'thin is in' crap!

Agent Smith

Speaking from a Male Perspective. I admit i'm no addonis, and i dont expect all women to be helens of troy

As an irish guy, i can perfectly accept irish women not being golden brown, or not being size 0 (I personnally think that stick thin women can look horrendious. look at linsey lohan before and after her massaive weightgain.)

i believe once people are happy being who they are, i think their true beauty shows out.

skywards

pikachucheeks wrote: »

I've been making a conscious effort to get fitter this summer and in the past few weeks, I've become happier with my appearance, definitely!

Yay! Go ride some horses, you'll feel even better .

Maple

i've good days and bad days.

when i was younger, i used have a terrible body image resulting in messing around with starving myself/vomiting/mis-use of laxatives but thankfully i copped onto that before it took too serious a hold.

i'm no supermodel but i'm me, i just want to be healthy and have a laugh rather than be obsessing over calories. i know when too much is too much and i have to cut down on foods in order to get back to my normal weight.

i think being confident in yourself is hugely important and its also very attractive in a person.

liah

For the most part I'm not bothered enough to actually go out and make an effort to lose the extra weight. I'm not fat, by any means, but I suppose I could afford to tone up. I'm relatively happy with myself though.

Once in awhile like another few posters mentioned I'll have a fat day/week. Having one of those this week, actually. Uncool.

Beth1978

Hi OP

Yes I saw Midday today too and found it to be both frank and honest...refreshing to hear on Irish tv. I can't say I'm happy with my body no and can't remember a time in my life when I ever was...but....I'm currently working on that and going the gym and things seem to be getting better. It's given me more of a positive mental attitude and therefore I've joined some other things...swimming, etc. I also know that when I'm not happy with myself that this comes across to others and shows I'm lacking in confidence. I know its such an American thing to say but I know I have to learn to like what I see before others do.

allabouteve

I'm flat as a pancake and scrawny as hell. I'd love parts that stick out, but at 31 I've come to accept its never going to happen.

Growing up, I had a particular problem in school when all the other girls started developing and I stayed like a pre-adolescent. I remember asking my mother to buy me a bra (in my teens) and she laughed at me and said it wasn't urgent!

I feel a stab of envy the odd time when I compare myself with a more shapely woman, but I've learned never to compare. I just try to enjoy the fact that I can get away with more food sins than most other women can.

Lia_lia

Only recently I've started feeling a bit off about my weight and all that.
Up until this year I could eat all I want and not put on weight. When I was about 15-17 I was very active. Going to the gym most days, rowing, karate. Then I stopped because of school and I injured my knee. But I was still the same size whether I exercised or not.

But in the last year I've put on about a stone. I guess my metabolism has slowed down. Plus I've had to change my pill and this has definitely something to do with my weight increase (bigger boobs, though!). I'm by no means fat, just have a bit of a belly now.

I still never weigh myself though. We have never had a weighing scales at home because my mother thinks it unhealthy as none of us in the house need to lose weight.



Good thing about this weight increase is that I'm trying to eat healthier. So I guess that's alright!

fedor29

lia lia best thing you can do is send me a pic of yourself so i can give you my opinion. im here to help

fedor29

eh you too liah

4zn76tysfajdxp

fedor29 wrote: »

lia lia best thing you can do is send me a pic of yourself so i can give you my opinion. im here to help

fedor29 wrote: »

eh you too liah

PM sent.

Wibbs

fedor29 ease up on that direction you're on. This forum is not for that. Thanks.

minidazzler

I hate weighing scales. They put a number on beauty that just can't be put there. People think a low number means they are beautiful, but that is not true, it's utter bull in fact. Beauty to me is something thats felt.


I also dislike mirrors. The saying goes that the Camera adds 10 lbs, but I think mirrors add the perception of another 20 to someone who is not feeling good about themselves.


I'll give an example.

Back in December I did no exercise, I was 6'2" and 200 lbs, I didn't like my Body too much.

In January I started running alot, at least every 2 days.

By March I was 6'3 and ~200lbs, but I was going up and down 7 lbs through out the day. But after running I would look in the Mirror basically naked and sweating and thought I looked fantastic. But I didn't look much different, It was just my state of mind.

Now, I haven't been able to run much and I feel bad about my body again, still no major changes, although I have put on a bit of a gut, (which will be gone by end of summer).

What I am trying to say, it's about how you feel on the inside, exercise releases endorphins, they make you happy, you look in the mirror and you will more likely be happy about yourself.

So remember ladies and gentlemen, you most likely look better than YOU think.

g'em

I have a slightly skewed view of my body - I tend not to look at my body in purely aesthetics terms, I look at my body and immediately think about what it can do, and it can do quite a lot.

I train 4-5 times a week, I lift heavy stuff, I work hard to give my body good fuel and keep it functioning as a efficiently as it can. My body is far from perfect, but with my hand on my heart I can say in all honesty that the bits I don't like are greatly outweighed by the knowledge that the sum of all the parts of my body, good and bad, allow me to do some pretty cool things.

My ass is big, but it gives me leverage in the bottom (no pun intended!) of a lift. My thighs are massive, but they hold the strength that allowed me to deadlift 135kg on Monday. My back is wide but it allows me to support ~ 100kg on my chest without toppling forward. My shoulders are rounded and higher than average, but they let me hold my bodyweight over my head with ease.

As I get older (big 3-0 this year) my mental image of my body is softening, I'm accepting the limitations I have and appreciating that even though I may not look ready to grace the catwalks of Milan that really. doesn't. matter.

pikachucheeks wrote: »

I've been making a conscious effort to get fitter this summer and in the past few weeks, I've become happier with my appearance, definitely!

Actively making an effort to take care of your body will give you infinitely better confidence levels, knowing that you're giving the one and only body you have the best tlc it could wish for pays many, many, many dividends You'll look younger, your skin will be tauter, your general well-being will improve, you'll sleep better, you'll have more energy and be more focused.

In all honesty I look younger now than I did pre-exercising 5 years ago!!

Das Kitty

I don't like my stomach, it sticks out. Even when I was fit as hell and toned everywhere else it still stuck out. I've come to accept it now, it's just how I'm made.

That said, I look in the mirror and I'm quite happy with what I see, even though I'm a bit overweight and not exactly slim, I see a slim person. Logically I know I'm not slim, but I think being happy with what I see provides me that illusion.

I developed a waist about 6 years ago and since then I've liked how I look, regardless of my weight or size. I also have mismatched boobs but I still like them, they're unique!

shellyboo

I'm overweight and as memory serves, always have been... but I have a much better body image now than I did when I was small.

I never thought I was fat until a relative once said to me "ah sure that's all just puppy fat, you'll lose that". I remember thinking, what puppy fat?! And so began the obsession.

All the way through secondary school I thought the same, and while I was overweight, I certainly wasn't the heifer I imagined myself to be. I was maybe a size 18 at most, but I thoght I was a absolute whale.

This alleviated a bit in college when I found that guys were actually attracted to me... but I didn't have a boyfriend so I decided it was because I was fat. Then I got a boyfriend - and his family wanted him to dump me, because I was fat. We stayed together, but my body image plummeted during that time. Don't think it was my boyfriend's fault, he did used to tell me I was gorgeous, but I remember when he used to say it I'd just feel uncomfortable and angry and genuinely thought he was lying. I couldn't see what he saw.

Now... I'd say I have a better body image than most of my thin friends. I can look in the mirror and like most of what I see, most of the time. That's not to say I wouldn't like to lose some weight, I would... but I haven't found an easy way to do it, and I'm not making myself unhappy just to look a little better.

Ginny

I've always had a slightly skewed body image, these days I'm more relaxed but in the past I have had issues with food and thinking I was huge, I've eaten just bananas, grapes and popcorn while doing marathon walks every night, losing 3 stone in the most unhealthiest way ever. I can remember dreading every night out I had with my friends, and spending the whole night thinking everyone was talking about how huge I was and spent most nights comparing myself to everyone else in the room. I remember a point when the bones in my arse hurt if I sat on a wall because I was so thin.
Thankfully a photo at my 21st made me cop on and see that I looked ill, I wouldn't say I had a full blown disorder but I do think I was on the brink at some points.
These days its a different story, being ill about 5 years ago made me gradually put on a good bit of weight which I've battled with on and off since then.
I have my good days and bad days, I have days when I can't look in the mirror and other days when I think I'm the biz..:D Now I'm back in the gym and I'm determined to be healthier, not necessarily skinnier but healthier.

jellie

shellyboo wrote: »

Then I got a boyfriend - and his family wanted him to dump me, because I was fat. We stayed together, but my body image plummeted during that time.

That is AWFUL! did he tell you this or his family? i had an ex tell me his friend told him he had horrible taste in women - that was a lovely feeling.

i always thought i was fat even when i wasnt. looking back of photos of me as a teenager i think "WTF! you were gorgeous!". maybe gorgeous is an exaggeration but i was definitely nowhere near as ugly as i felt.

i think i thought i was fat for so long that i eventually made myself fat! i am overweight, but ive been doing something about it. im only 5ft so any extra weight shows quite easily unfortunately been dieting for a good while now and ive lost nearly 2 stone. its slow and its headwrecking, but i love how my body and shape is changing. every now & then ill look in the mirror and something different will catch my eye - "wow my boobs are looking great now my stomachs a bit smaller!" etc :P

ive always hated my body, but as i see it change im starting to like my curves and certain parts of me. maybe its cause im consciously making an effort to do something about it & im proud of myself when i see the results

Dragan

I have discovered that being happy with how i look has very little to do with how i actually look.

Go back 2 years and i was training 5 to 9 times weekly, very big, very strong. I identified and defined myself by my physicality, so the area's of my physicality that i felt we lacking were like a chain around my neck. I allowed this "inability" to live up the image i had for myself to basically become a noose.

Eventually some injuries and illness would knock me out of training, I would get weaker, smaller and all that. These identifiers i had for myself lessened but there wasn't really any impact. My self image didn't sink.

As i couldn't train and i like to keep busy I got into other things and personal projects. I acknowledged that i both have and enjoy using an artistic streak and all kinds of things came out. Now i take photographs, i write music, i paint and draw and all kinds of good stuff. These activities have allowed me to see that there is a lot more to me than the physical incarnation but a mental and a spiritual side which is worth putting the same thoughts and efforts into that i used to dedicate to my training.

Even my attitude towards training has now changed. I used to be a bit all over, no real goals beyond general size and strenght. I think at the moment i have a stronger drive to train than i have ever had in my life.

Not because i hate my body like i used to, i have accepted myself in that way. Simple because i now VALUE my body more than i ever have and i want it to be strong and healthy and able for the challenges that i want to face.

So, with that my plan is to return to training with the goal of simply being healthy and happy and to train for what i consider to be the best reason in the world to do anything, because i love it.

I think what i am trying to say is that i think it's important to not get hung up on how you look, and to not make the mistake that i made, of allowing that to consume you. But you do need to accept that your body is important and it's, in a way, the very essence of who you are. So you need to accept and respect that.

shellyboo

sar84 wrote: »

That is AWFUL! did he tell you this or his family? i had an ex tell me his friend told him he had horrible taste in women - that was a lovely feeling.

His family told him and then he told me He wasn't allowed talk about me at home at all, and his family never knew we moved in together.

The things I put up with, actually... mad.

bronte

I feel constantly under scrutiny due to my line of work (Acting)
There is a major pressure to be the most talented, most beautiful and skinniest girl in the industry. Even in training, schools will put pressure on girls to lose weight, even when they don't need to.
It drives me NUTS! If I wanted to starve myself for the rest of my days I'd have become a runway model. Not that it's okay in that industry either.
I do not see how being skeletal has anything got to do with being a good actress. Last time I checked, acting was the realistic portrayal of a human being.
Since when have all human beings become size zero?

This damn industry makes me sick sometimes.


GRRRRRRRRRRR...rant over. :mad:

Faith

Yeah, I think I have a skewed body image. I know by my clothes size (12, although I put on exam weight so that's hanging in the balance at the moment!) that I can't be that fat, but I look in the mirror and often see this ugly obese woman staring back at me. My mum played a large part in that, as she's obsessed with her weight and transferred that to me. She'll often tell me that I need to lose weight, with the best of intentions though. It's left with with a lot of hangups. I could spend hours outlining everything that I think is wrong with my body. I'm constantly aware of my stomach, and feel people are staring at it and judging me. It's ridiculous, but it's not something that's easy to change.

metaoblivia

I've never been overweight. Growing up, I did the normal, "oh jeez, I'm so fat," but I knew it wasn't true. I wasn't 100% happy with my body, but I knew that what I picked on was little details. I even did gymnastics - a sport known for body image issues - and I was a big girl compared to most of my teammates because of my height and because I hit puberty several years earlier. But weight was still never really an issue. I was actually much, much more insecure about my face and coloring. I thought I was just hideously ugly.
Now, I'm pretty happy with what I see when I look in the mirror. I never weigh myself because I don't see the point unless you're at the doctor's office. Sometimes I'll nit pick, but I can recognize that pretty quickly and tell myself that I'm nit picking. I've also come to accept a few things, such as my thighs. I would love to have slender, skinny thighs, but I don't. Gymnastics and swimming made sure of that.
The only time I do get unnecessarily nervous is when I have had to see myself in photos or on film. I absolutely dread it. Usually, it ends up being nowhere close to the disaster I imagine. But I still find flaws, and I usually have to view/watch it and put the pictures or the film aside for a few days and come back to it. Then I can look at and say, oh I don't look so bad afterall.

Pyr0

I'm currently becoming more aware of my fitness atm. If I have something which isn't exactly healthy I have a "fat" moment, even though I'm only 10 stone with 12% body fat, I'm hardly chubbs ! So I guess I know how wimmen feel sometimes !

I'd also train whenver I can, all this week i haven't been able to do anything because of work and I feel terrible and unhealthy, even though I know i'm not. Back to the gym over the weekend and monday/tuesday before I go away. That should keep me feeling okay !

ciagr297

Dragan wrote: »

But you do need to accept that your body is important and it's, in a way, the very essence of who you are. So you need to accept and respect that.

absolutely Dragan, i think acceptance is key. yes, everybody wants to change things about themselves but you've also got to work with what you have.
for me, i've always had serious image issues. so much so that i realised i used those issues as a shield against the outside world.

i'm not saying i've got rid of the issues, they'll always be there. but i have been able to look at what i see as flaws from a different angle.

instead of saying i don't like this or this and continuing in that spiral, i accept that i don't like whatever it is and see if i can change it (non-surgically i mean) or hide it discreetly (clothes) and failing that i find that simply accepting makes it seem like a smaller issue and much easier to digest.

and the big moment for me in being able to accept me was when i realised that if i had been as perfect as i want, i would not have gone the places i went, met the people i did or see the world in the same way. and at the end of the day, i value that more than anything

all said, i have good and bad days. i still don't enjoy mirrors but i try to see these things as reconstructive as opposed to destructive

ciagr297

metaoblivia wrote: »

The only time I do get unnecessarily nervous is when I have had to see myself in photos or on film. I absolutely dread it. Usually, it ends up being nowhere close to the disaster I imagine. But I still find flaws, and I usually have to view/watch it and put the pictures or the film aside for a few days and come back to it. Then I can look at and say, oh I don't look so bad afterall.

yup, me too

LauraLoo

to quote allabouteve "but I've learned never to compare"

well said...i think we only start finding faults when we start comparing ourselves to others.

My external family are obsessed with weight. When you see them they'll tell you who's put on loads of weight and whos lost it. Growing up, if you didnt get the "you've lost loaaaaaadddds of weight" it means you've put it on.

Ive come to realise that body image isnt about weight as when i was tiny i still hid in baggy clothes. Im 2 sizes bigger than my smallest and im actually happier and more confident. I am not relying on being tiny to feel attractive- i think real attractiveness comes from confidence, a nice attitude and making the most of what you have.

I am so very unhappy with my body. I weigh myself daily. I am totally obsessed with how I look. I know I can look good when clothed, and I rarely leave the house for a night out not feeling a million dollars but once I'm out the insecurities start to hit. I think alot of it is down to the clothes I would like to wear, I carry weight mostly on my legs so I can't wear short skirts etc. I ALWAYS compare myself to other women, always. It's a horrible feeling.

When I was younger I was so super fit, I did Karate, Basketball, Athletics, Dancing, and of course I could eat what I liked, but I badly injured my knee in Karate and ended up never going back and that was the only sport that I did outside school so once I left school, I left behind all the other activities too. I thought I was fat when I was in school but when I look at the pictures - I was feckin fabulous!

I don't think i'll ever be happy with my looks and I think it's something that is always going to be an issue in my life

Edit; Just to add, noone that meets me would ever think I was so unhappy as I come across as this super confident person who's always happy! I'm sure I'm not the only one like this!