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  • 28-06-2009 5:30pm
    #1
    letmego
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3 ✭


    Felt safer posting over here than in personal issues, lol. The 'deal' is, i'm 18 years old and just started going out with this great guy, he's 20. i'm a virgin, hence the title of the post. He isn't a virgin and pretty experienced i'd say from what we've done together already. I'm not too nervous about sex, honestly not expecting fireworks or symphonies, but people are always talking about guys 'not getting it up' and i'm worried about me not getting excited enough to 'fit' him, if you get what i mean. hopefully i haven't confused you all too much lol, but has anyone ever had this problem when having sex??


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    #2
    challengemaster
    Registered Users Posts: 16,930 ✭✭✭✭challengemaster


    General advice which will probably be given:

    If a baby can come out of there when the need arises, then sure as heck a penis can go up. One's quite a lot bigger than the other!

    If you're nervous, you're probably more likely to be tense about it and it might make things harder. Don't worry about it, go with things, take it slowly, and with enough foreplay then you really shouldn't have anything to worry about.

    If lubrication is an issue or you think may be an issue, buying some (which won't interfere with condoms) is always an option. You may not need it, but having a backup is always a safe bet.

    Plenty and plenty of foreplay is really the advice 99.6% of people will give :)

    (that, and have fun for christ sake!:D)


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    #3
    SarahSassy
    Registered Users Posts: 3,145 ✭✭✭SarahSassy


    If you have been using tampons (and I hope he is wider than a tampon for your sake :D ) then you shouldnt have too much trouble. Nerves can affect that but maybe have a glass of wine first to relax you... Make sure you have adequate contraception too cos that it one less thing to worry about. It may or may not be fantastic the first time, if not, dont worry it will get better.


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    #4
    Shabbah
    Closed Accounts Posts: 63 ✭✭Shabbah


    3 tips from me:-

    Make sure this is what you want
    Relax
    & Relax

    :) As long as you are relaxed and ye do some of what ye've been doing so far and you let yourself enjoy it, the natural lubrication process will take care of things down below, you don't have to be overly excited for him to fit you!!

    Believe me, I've been the farthest thing from excited - ie. noting what I needed to buy in the shopping or staring at dots on the ceiling counting down the seconds....etc - whilst possibly acting excited for himselfs sake!!! :eek: and things have still gone smoothly ;)

    You'll be fine. And don't worry, boys watch porn a hell of alot while they're teenagers so he's pobably got all his tricks from there....he might not be as experienced as he'd like you think he is :D

    Best of luck!


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    #5
    Shabbah
    Closed Accounts Posts: 63 ✭✭Shabbah


    SarahSassy wrote: »
    Nerves can affect that but maybe have a glass of wine first to relax you...

    Was going to suggest the same, if you drink, have a couple of drinks to help you let go of any inhibitions or worries you may have! Won't do you any harm :) Just don't get bladdered in case you fall asleep midway through........:eek:


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    #6
    Maddison
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,594 ✭✭✭Maddison


    Your body when aroused creates a natural lube and dont worry bout fit....vaginas can expand.....a lot. If you are worried though, make sure there is plenty of foreplay and most importantly that YOU are ready, I hope that this guy is special as your virginity is very precious...dont give it away unless you feel he is the deserving of it. Get your self some lube from Ann Summers if you feel you might need a little extra help with lubrication. Relax & Enjoy.
    I dont regret whom I lost my virginity to...but where I lost it.


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    #7
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    LOTS of foreplay. That is all.


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    #8
    letmego
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3 ✭letmego


    Thanks for the advice, pretty much what I was thinking, will definitely have a few drinks before hand too, won't get entirely pissed tho ha ha. So plenty of foreplay is the general consensus, I do love general consesus' : )


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    #9
    Raze_them_all
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,477 ✭✭✭✭Raze_them_all


    "He isn't a virgin and pretty experienced i'd say from what we've done together already"

    There's no way of knowing, maybe he's just naturally gifted


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    #10
    letmego
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3 ✭letmego


    true he could be naturally gifted, he's not a virgin tho of that i'm sure. i'd rather him not be a virgin tho so we're both not too clueless, that would relax me, and being relaxed is the key apparently lol


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    #11
    senape
    Registered Users Posts: 43 ✭senape


    I would advise the use of lubricant for the first time it will make things much easier, particularly if he is big. You should discuss any fears with him before you so he can reassure you and help you relax.


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    #12
    She Devil
    Registered Users Posts: 9,032 ✭✭✭She Devil


    You are definately ready if you are aware it wont be fireworks :)

    It may be ouch though :)

    Just relax and make him make you feel comfortable, you will get all that through foreplay.


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