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My Neighbours Cock

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  • 30-06-2009 10:38pm
    #1
    My name is URL
    Registered Users Posts: 25,068 ✭✭✭✭


    They got one to occupy their hens.

    It does it's thing at 5am in these summer months. Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

    I tried shouting at it but it didn't work.... What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?
    Tagged:


«1

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    #2
    Ghost Train
    Registered Users Posts: 30,245 ✭✭✭✭Ghost Train


    move


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    #3
    liah
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,750 ✭✭✭liah


    Bow & arrow. Target practice, get your aim up for the next AH beers.


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    #4
    ejmaztec
    Registered Users Posts: 24,071 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    My name is URL wrote: »
    They got one to occupy their hens.

    It does it's thing at 5am in these summer months. Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

    I tried shouting at it but it didn't work.... What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

    Pullet.


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    #5
    brummytom
    Registered Users Posts: 10,572 ✭✭✭✭brummytom


    Show it a photo of Ann Widdicombe/Mary Harney.. that always seems to calm down my cock


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    #6
    deisedude
    Registered Users Posts: 4,893 ✭✭✭deisedude


    My name is URL wrote: »
    They got one to occupy their hens.

    It does it's thing at 5am in these summer months. Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

    I tried shouting at it but it didn't work.... What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

    Choke the chicken:D


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    #7
    AMixedBag
    Closed Accounts Posts: 259 ✭✭AMixedBag


    Ah, you got me!


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    #8
    fullstop
    Registered Users Posts: 11,400 ✭✭✭✭fullstop


    Epic thread title. Kudos OP


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    #9
    Tomebagel
    Registered Users Posts: 1,138 ✭✭✭Tomebagel


    Depends what size it is?My neighbour has one and you cant get within a 12'' radius of it.


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    #10
    az2wp0sye65487
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,931 ✭✭✭az2wp0sye65487


    I saw the name of the thread and came in thinking you'd be telling us how you were some sort of peeping tom!


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    #11
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Buy a fox!


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    #12
    ejmaztec
    Registered Users Posts: 24,071 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    fullstop wrote: »
    Epic thread title. Kudos OP

    A lot of threads are a load of old cock.


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    #13
    AMixedBag
    Closed Accounts Posts: 259 ✭✭AMixedBag


    Ah, you got me! Will i come over and give it an aul rattle sure? Id probably have more experience then you to be honest.


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    #14
    Insect Overlord
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,892 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Buy a fox!

    Then see which one you can toss further.


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    #15
    admiralofthefleet
    Closed Accounts Posts: 15,515 ✭✭✭✭admiralofthefleet


    My name is URL wrote: »
    They got one to occupy their hens.

    It does it's thing at 5am in these summer months. Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

    I tried shouting at it but it didn't work.... What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

    be careful, you dont want cock rot


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    #16
    4zn76tysfajdxp
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    Start calling it a rooster. I don't know if you're aware OP, but the thread title as it is is somewhat misleading.


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    #17
    Lockstep
    Registered Users Posts: 9,030 ✭✭✭Lockstep


    A not so subtle play on words.

    Couldn't really expect much else from My_name_is_url


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    #18
    brummytom
    Registered Users Posts: 10,572 ✭✭✭✭brummytom


    Chaya Fierce Sinus wrote: »
    peeping tom!

    You called?


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    #19
    Agamemnon
    Registered Users Posts: 2,367 ✭✭✭Agamemnon


    My name is URL wrote: »
    Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf
    If your neighbour's cock is small enough to fit in your ear it can't be that much of a nuisance.


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    #20
    galwayrush
    Registered Users Posts: 12,815 ✭✭✭✭galwayrush


    You're only jealous because your neighbour's cock is up before your's in the mornings.;)


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    #21
    ejmaztec
    Registered Users Posts: 24,071 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    galwayrush wrote: »
    You're only jealous because your neighbour's cock is up before your's in the mornings.;)

    That's a fowl thing to say.


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    #22
    Vain
    Registered Users Posts: 2,689 ✭✭✭Vain


    Give the cock a bashing.


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    #23
    itsallaboutheL
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,333 ✭✭✭✭itsallaboutheL


    ejmaztec wrote: »
    Pullet.


    Lads will ye thank the man for gods sake!!! thats the greatest pun ever!!


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    #24
    In All Fairness
    Closed Accounts Posts: 515 ✭✭✭In All Fairness


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Buy a fox!
    Jaysus! Between the fox tossing and the chicken choking he'll nearly sleep through it. But tell us this OP, what sort of people are your neighbours that they haven't killed it themselves. Are there neighbours on the other side too? Would a joint offensive with ghettoblasters do any good?


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    #25
    phasers
    Registered Users Posts: 18,159 ✭✭✭✭phasers


    itsallaboutheL wrote: »
    Lads will ye thank the man for gods sake!!! thats the greatest pun ever!!
    I don't get it...


    report them to the gardaí for running a cockfighting ring in their garden


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    #26
    InkSlinger67
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,756 ✭✭✭InkSlinger67


    Step up URL!!! There's nothing worse than procrastinating about something that annoys you and not doing something about it!

    Recently I took action on something that regularly annoyed me. Now I've taken care of that thing I feel much better and Barry Scott's corpse is in my bath dissolving in Cillit Bang!

    Success! :pac:


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    #27
    phasers
    Registered Users Posts: 18,159 ✭✭✭✭phasers


    InkSlinger67 wrote: »
    Step up URL!!! There's nothing worse than procrastinating about something that annoys you and not doing something about it!

    Recently I took action on something that regularly annoyed me. Now I've taken care of that thing I feel much better and Barry Scott's corpse is in my bath dissolving in Cillit Bang!

    Success! :pac:
    You got Billy Mays stupid, the greatest pitchman of all time!


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    #28
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    In All Fairness wrote: »
    Jaysus! Between the fox tossing and the chicken choking he'll nearly sleep through it. But tell us this OP, what sort of people are your neighbours that they haven't killed it themselves. Are there neighbours on the other side too? Would a joint offensive with ghettoblasters do any good?

    Connect up a very loudamp to a mic in the chicken run and use a delay loop, every "cock-adoodle-doo" will be repeated by a "cock-adoodle-doo" It'll soon shut up as it'll be scared that this bigger rival will do it one! :)


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    #29
    Super-Rush
    Registered Users Posts: 19,473 ✭✭✭✭Super-Rush


    I'll see your cock and raise you


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    #30
    K-9
    Registered Users Posts: 43,311 ✭✭✭✭K-9


    My name is URL wrote: »
    What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

    Too chicken?

    *gets coat.

    Mad Men's Don Draper : What you call love was invented by guys like me, to sell nylons.



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    #31
    Insect Overlord
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,892 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    super-rush wrote: »
    I'll see your cock and raise you

    It ain't big enough ;)


This discussion has been closed.
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