stay at home parents-advice please

RANIA

hi, i am a stay at home mother to a fab 18mth old daughter.she is sooo busy .but i am feeling a bit bored lately,we go to parks, play grounds,shopping,her granaparents, aquarium etc etc,
any suggestions on how to pass time,i find it lonely as a stay at home mother, my husband works about 80 hours per week, and is away 2 nights per weeks also,my friends all work and so are only around at weekends, but if my dh is off then i spend time with him.
any one else find its a bit boring and lonely?i mean i would not go back to work as i love being there for dd,its the combination of my husband being gone,that does not help.

~me~

have you gone to any play areas with coffee shops?- theres joeys in naas http://www.littlejoeys.ie/about.html
and gokidsgo will be opening in coolmine soon.
im sure they've similar ones if you live elsewhere.
it does get boring and tiring at times. have you got any friends with kids, that might help a bit if you have play dates. hope this helps.

RANIA

yeah we do the play centres and parks where we live,its all money !!dd is 18mths so a bit young for most of the equioment though!friends all work so play dates are few and far between..

NatWW

Hi RANIA,

I totally understand how you feel. I am pretty much in the same boat here, except I am not a mother yet but a mum-to-be. My little girl (first pregnancy) is due to be born first week of October.

Anyway, I have been working as a freelancer from home since I relocated to the Cork area (about 1.5 years ago now) and I feel increasingly lonely.

As you said, friends and family are all working during the day so it's kinda hard for meeting up and all, and does not leave me much choice but to talk to the dog (who doesn't answer back for some reason )

To make matters worse, business is extremely slow (I am hardly working at all in fact) so I am already kinda like a sahm but without the baby yet.

My husband also works away (in Dublin) 3 days and 2 nights a week which does not help either.

In a nutshell, I spend most of my days (and some nights) alone, looking at my bump expanding, waiting for my little one to arrive and walking the dog/reading/shopping... but there is only so much one can do anyway. I dont feel like doing all of these for hours every day either.

RANIA, I think the best for you (and for me) is to try and find some local club or group of mothers who are in the same situation and who are able to meet for coffee/chat on a regular basis.

Would you happen to be based around the Cork area too?

Good luck,
NatWW

Nevyn

Why not ask your health nurse for a list of parent and baby groups in your area?

jmbkay

please all you stay at home motherss, enjoy your time with your kids. you are doing the most important job in the world. dont forget you are as valuable to society as anybody else. Contact Cuidiu, the irish childbirth trust, numbers may be in the phone book, or ask at your local health centre. Also, think about starting a mum and baby group in your area. When you're out and about, talk to other mothers, its likely they feel the same as you. Be kind to yourselves and give yourselves breaks and treats, mothers to not get quality time unless they take it.

RANIA

NatWW wrote: »

Hi RANIA,

I totally understand how you feel. I am pretty much in the same boat here, except I am not a mother yet but a mum-to-be. My little girl (first pregnancy) is due to be born first week of October.

Anyway, I have been working as a freelancer from home since I relocated to the Cork area (about 1.5 years ago now) and I feel increasingly lonely.

As you said, friends and family are all working during the day so it's kinda hard for meeting up and all, and does not leave me much choice but to talk to the dog (who doesn't answer back for some reason )

To make matters worse, business is extremely slow (I am hardly working at all in fact) so I am already kinda like a sahm but without the baby yet.

My husband also works away (in Dublin) 3 days and 2 nights a week which does not help either.

In a nutshell, I spend most of my days (and some nights) alone, looking at my bump expanding, waiting for my little one to arrive and walking the dog/reading/shopping... but there is only so much one can do anyway. I dont feel like doing all of these for hours every day either.

RANIA, I think the best for you (and for me) is to try and find some local club or group of mothers who are in the same situation and who are able to meet for coffee/chat on a regular basis.

Would you happen to be based around the Cork area too?

Good luck,
NatWW

i am in galway.m&t groups out till sep.the rainy weather does not help!

madbev90210

Hi OP, I know exactly how you feel! My son is just gone 2 and its so hard wondering what to do with him all day every day. He's in a creche until one so that helps. Things I do with him incude

1. A simple walk
2. Go to park
3. Go swimming
4. Baking or rice krispie cakes
5. Art, painting, colouring, mala etc
6. Play in the bath
7. Hide and seek and chasing in our apartment!
8. Put on music and dance around, give tickles!
9. Watch nursery rhymes together on you tube
10. Go the pet shop
11. Watch dvds
12. Fill a container (bigish) with lentils and play with them with your child, fun but messy!
13. Pour cornflakes and or rice krispies on the floor and walk in them in your bare feet together, again fun but messy!
14. Plant flowers or even cress?
15. Just sitting with him and doing jigsaws or stories
16. bring him to Smyths and let him play on bikes etc and in little houses etc.. but you usually have to buy at least something in the end, like bubbles!

I must say though the days go quicker since Iv stopped driving and so visiting relatives/going shops etc takes nearly half a day whereas it used to take about an hr or 2! the rain doesnt help though, but Im a rain kinda girl!

Chuckchuck

Hi its a tough job without adult conversation...I do it. Are there any parent and toddler groups in your area, good for getting to know Mums&Dads in the same boat. Also try to get out alone or with a friend even for an hour a week to keep in touch with the outside world. I called my landline my social life for a long time