Feeling safe whilst home alone

Ginny

I'm usually fine, when I first moved into my house on my own I locked the bedroom door for the first week or so, now I'm grand, the OH lives with me, but even when he's not here I have my beroom window open and the landing window open for air.
I don't go around checking rooms or anything, I'm generally not that worried when alone.

gidget

I've never felt scared at all when i've been home alone. My mam & dad had me babysitting my brother when i was 11 on Friday nights and i thought it was so cool at the time to be able to stay up and watch The Word on Channel 4 with all the junk food i could want . Then when i was 17 they went on holiday with my bro for 2 weeks and again i loved the peace and complete control of the tv and and especially that grown up feeling of being on my own and independant. It showed that they had a lot of trust in me at a young age anyway. Nowaday's i'm lucky if i get a day or night home alone because everyone's jobless and broke!!!

Nightwish

I relish the nights I get to be at home alone. I love the silence in the house. I've never felt fear, because I dont think there is anything to be afraid of. One of the girls I live with wont stay here on her own. She's petrified in fact, and before she can sleep, she'll text one of us to make sure there'll be someone home. I really dont understand it. I find it quite irrational.

Faith

Lia_lia wrote: »

I'm always home alone at night. I live with my Mother and my younger brother. My Mum is usually at work/out and my brother is always out with friends. So when i come home from work it's just me and the dog! But I've been left home alone since I was a young teenager, never found it scary or anything. I actually kinda like being alone. If I get bored I walk over to a friends house or something. Same story whilst at college.

But I do know a few people who get scared being home alone. People aged 18+. Don't get it!

I don't get scared in the slightest when there's someone coming home at some stage of the night, just when my parents are away for the whole night. My boyfriend works in bars and clubs and often wouldn't be home until after 4, and it never bothers me in his house.

I don't give a feck about being robbed, tbh, as long as they didn't come near me. I don't care about stuff being stolen, it's all replaceable. It's just the thought that intruders could attack/rape/murder me. I should really start locking my bedroom door, but then I worry I'll get trapped if there was a fire! (I'm an awful worrier, I know!)

mental07

I love apartment living! My flatmate is away at the moment but I'm absolutely fine with it. I feel much safer alone in an apartment than I would in my parents' (quite isolated) house. I don't even know my neighbours but it's kind of reassuring to know that they're there all the same!

I used to be scared to be home alone, when I lived in rented accommodation and when I was younger. But now it doesn't bother me at all. Infact, I find it quite relaxing.

Dudess

Lia_lia wrote: »

I'm always home alone at night. I live with my Mother and my younger brother. My Mum is usually at work/out and my brother is always out with friends. So when i come home from work it's just me and the dog! But I've been left home alone since I was a young teenager, never found it scary or anything. I actually kinda like being alone. If I get bored I walk over to a friends house or something. Same story whilst at college.

But I do know a few people who get scared being home alone. People aged 18+. Don't get it!

Age doesn't make a difference - it's not the same as childish fears, e.g. of the dark, of what might be under the bed, etc... it's due to feeling vulnerable. I admit it's not the most rational, but I can't help it (it's not completely irrational anyway - break-ins do occur). And it's certainly reasonable for an elderly person to feel vulnerable. You're lucky it doesn't affect you but not everyone is that lucky. It's not so much being alone at night when I'm up and about that bothers me anyway (if anything happened, I'd at least be in a position to do a runner if needs be) - especially if someone will be home at some stage. It's being in that vulnerable position of asleep alone all night. If I was woken by a loud noise, I would be absolutely freaked!

Snoopy1

I hate being home alone. If my OH is ever away i just cannot sleep. I'm a really light sleeper anyway, and if im on my own, i can hear every noise , and am in a constant state of panic.

I'm 30 and really should have grown out of this by now!!!!!

Dudess

Well my mum's in her 60s and doesn't feel comfortable being on her own at night.

Yeah, I'm a really light sleeper too - it sucks.

emeraldstar

Dudess wrote: »

Yeah, I'm a really light sleeper too - it sucks.

So am I, but that's actually a reason why I LOVE being home alone - no-one to disturb me. In my college home my flatmate can be quite loud, and in my family home my Dad is up every morning at about 6 and wakes me about 90% of the time :mad:

Mr Benevolent

What the... you've all been reading the papers too much.

Nightwish

Snoopy1 wrote: »

I hate being home alone. If my OH is ever away i just cannot sleep. I'm a really light sleeper anyway, and if im on my own, i can hear every noise , and am in a constant state of panic.

I'm 30 and really should have grown out of this by now!!!!!

Do what I do...wear earplugs!

Novella

It doesn't matter if I'm at home in my parents house or in my apartment alone, I always feel terrified! All those little creaking noises freak the hell outta me and if I'm watching tv or whatever, I turn it down really low so I can hear if anyone is trying to break in!
I remember one time, about a year or two ago, I was home alone IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY and I heard noise outside so I locked myself in the bathroom and sat in the shower for SIX HOURS until my mam came home! Turns out the noise was just the window cleaner and my parents thought it was hilarious!

I also tend to ring people a lot and be whispering down the phone like "OK, I'm home alone and I think someone's breaking in so I'm going to check! Stay on the phone and ring the guards if I don't talk back" hahaha. I used to think it was just me!!!!

metaoblivia

Several years ago I was living on my own and a man broke into my apartment and attempted to sexually assault me. It took several years and some therapy to feel completely comfortable with living alone after that (although I continued to - I don't like living with other people and that always outweighed the fear of living alone). For the people who don't understand why adults wouldn't feel safe whilst home alone, well you probably won't - and never will - until something happens that makes you realize just how vulnerable you are, how vulnerable we always are. As much as I would have liked to immediately bounced back to feeling safe whilst on my own after "the incident," the human mind generally doesn't work that way. Life is funny in that we either have to accept the small chance of bad things happening or convince ourselves that those things won't happen to us in order to live normally. And when you've been part of that small percentage, then you have to face the realities of your own vulnerability. You have to comes to terms with it in a way most people never will. And hopefully, you eventually learn how to feel safe again.
Currently, I live on my own, a first floor apartment in the middle of a city. I lose no sleep at night. I wear ear plugs because I'm a light sleeper, always have been. I take the general safety measures of keeping the doors and windows locked. And I feel very safe. But it took awhile for me to get there.

tommmy1979

I went to see Harry Potter last night.. it was a bit scary and there was nobody at home when i got in, had to check all the rooms for he who shall not be named before i went to bed..

and i'm a boy... actually no i'm a man

Snoopy1

Nightwish wrote: »

Do what I do...wear earplugs!

Ive tried earplugs, just find them really uncomfortable. I can always hear my heart beating really loud, im just a freak!!!!!:D

Malari

I get people who have been attacked/burgled themselves feeling vulnerable but not anyone else, unless you are paranoid.

I always get asked that question if I'm home alone - are you not terrified on your own? - and it just never enters my head to feel scared or worried.

Liquorice

I was a latchkey kid for years so being home alone during the day is totally fine, as is being home alone at night when I know someone's coming home at some point but when I'm alone for stretches longer than a day I really have to psych myself for it. I'm currently alone for the longest stretch I've ever been 'cause the family are on holiday for a fortnight & I've usually been too tired to care by the time I go to bed but the other night, the boyfriend was supposed to be coming over and got delayed on the other side of the city and I proceeded to freak the **** out for absolutely no good reason.

I've been refusing to look at reflecting surfaces 'cause I have an irrational fear of mirrors in the dark, and because I was reading about stuff like this before my parents went away, I can't look out the windows at night for fear of some weird looking animal looking back.

fonpokno

I love love love having the house to myself during the day. It's just lovely. Nights are ok too but I'm happier when someone's coming home.

However when the parents are away for a week or so I get panicky during the night sometimes but only cos I'm a mega paranoid lunatic. I tend to make the horrid mistake of reading the Paranormal forum when I'm at home on my own at night. Then I hear every tiny creak the house makes and generally end up sleeping with a lamp on and the blankets over my head and tucked all around me.

I'm also currently reading The Shining but I can't read it at night in bed cos I know I'll freak out and won't sleep. *sigh* Lunatic. :P

Liquorice wrote: »

I can't look out the windows at night for fear of some weird looking animal looking back.

I do this too! Except I'm always afraid it'll be a burglar or a giant floating ghost head.

allabouteve

How safe I feel completely depends on where I am.

I'm a really light sleeper, even clocks in the next room keep me awake, so every creak has me on high alert.

I used to live on a high floor in an apartment, and I felt completely safe since no one was likely to climb over the balcony or in the bedroom window. Also the presence of such close neighbours was reassuring.

I grew up in a very isolated area, and although I never spent the night alone in that house, I know I would have hated it.

Living with a friend takes the edge off, but being in a basement apartment alone is really going to give my imagination something to work on.:(

NewFrockTuesday

I had never lived on my own before but have to say its not as bad as I thought it would be. I have a housemate now purely for the company as it did get very lonely at night coming home to an empty house. I never felt unsafe as took the normal measures of locking doors and windows when I was off to bed. I live in a very old and settled area so theres not much activity anyway. You could hear a pin drop in the evenings.

At home in Achill, there isisnt a breeze on me. I wouldnt even bother locking the door. The folks and bros are in the house so looking at it, Id feel sorry for anyone stupid enough to try anything on. They be either beaten or scolded to death, depending on if bros or Milly reached them first.

IvyTheTerrible

I'm normally ok, but I do find that after becoming used to having the OH at home all the time, that I am more nervous when he is away for the night. Especially because now we live on the ground floor, which I'm not used to, and the area is prone to burglaries.

I don't leave lights on or carry weapons or anything like that, but if I wake up in the middle of the night after hearing a noise, I get a fright (cos you know you heard a noise but because you heard it in your sleep it's hard to put your finger on what it was, if you know what I man.

Security wise, I close all the shutters at night; that way I don't mind leaving the windows open.

Piste

I like having the house to myself at times, but not too long or I get lonely . I live in a terraced house with fairly thin walls so when people are moving around next door is can sound as though someone's upstairs which is fairly creepy. If I'm on my own I like to either have a bit of company at night or else I just come home really late and go straight to bed.

Edgedinblue

My parents went away there couple weeks ago for a week, leaving me alone in the house. i have to admit it doesnt bother me being alone in that house, and i always stick the alarm on at night anyway. this time around it was different, we've new neighbours who are so fricken noisy and we've a new puppy that barks in her sleep (bless!) so took me a night to figure out what all the noises are!!

although in my house, its diff story! so used to my boyfriend being there every night that when he visits home for couple days im lost, and every noise has me looking out the window and turning lights on!!

i also feel quite grannyish when im alone i check all the doors and windows, and every room a million times before eventually sticking the alarm on and going to bed

emeraldstar

Snoopy1 wrote: »

Ive tried earplugs, just find them really uncomfortable. I can always hear my heart beating really loud, im just a freak!!!!!:D

Haha no I'm kind of the same. I sometimes wear earplugs because I have to but really I'd rather not. They makes you much more aware of your own body. You hear the constant beat of your heart and everything else becomes so much more heightened too: your breathing, if you cough, etc. I find it quite makes me a bit queazy sometimes

sleepyescapade

I am used to being at home on my own when parents are away but get lonely after a few nights more than anything else. Would love a dog. Tend to usually stay upstairs though after dark, don't like going downstairs when its all dark :P Oh and leave the bathroom light on before going to bed, sometimes the landing light too Never use the house alarm but front door/back door are always locked early on.

WesternNight

I've never really liked being home alone at night. I'd always have the front and back doors locked at home when I'd be on my own.

Moved out of home a few years ago, currently living in a 2nd floor apartment. Felt pretty safe until we were broken into last year (we were home at the time). Now the door in the room I'm in (plus front door, obviously) is never unlocked. Especially the bedroom door when we're sleeping.

I'm ridiculously aware of my surroundings as well. I no longer assume that a noise is "just a cat" or whatever. I'm better about that than I was, though. Most of the fear has gone now, but I'm still maintaining pretty good security.