Tricks played on apprentices?

El Guapo!

I just remembered something that happened a couple of years ago. While we were all working we got the new apprentice to go down to the motor factors to ask for a flux capacitor. He did this and made a tit of himself! We also done the old classics on him like getting him to ask for sky hooks, a bucket of steam, a can of stripey spray paint and sent him to the shop to get a soup sandwich etc.
So it got me thinking.....does anybody else have funny stories or tricks played on you as an apprentice/newbie in work??

muckwarrior

Sounds like he's genuinely retarded.

El Guapo!

muckwarrior wrote: »

Sounds like he's genuinely retarded.

He wasn't exactly the sharpest tool in the toolbox.....

arybvtcw0eolkf

Dean09 wrote: »

does anybody else have funny stories or tricks played on you as an apprentice/newbie in work??

No.

Except that time we got that lad with meat spin - but I ain't saying anymore than that!. (he counted to nearly fifty before the penny dropped).
.

CreepingDeath

One of my sisters worked in a shop near a garage.
This young lad came in getting snacks for the lads and asks her if she has any "chocolate ovaries". She fell around the place laughing at the idiot.

cherryghost

he should have came to me. I have plenty of flux capacitors and deloreans here.

Joey the lips

What like the long stand and the glass hammer!

irelandrover

When I worked in a kitchen we had the new guy chopping flour for an hour before the boss caught him

trad

A skirting board ladder

A long stand

Left handed screwdriver

Enright

oh the memories

did the stand at one work place, th eguy in the stores wrapped up an empty box, gave it a part number and sent the guy back

appearently one can buy soup sandwiches these days!


chololate fireguard
underwater hairdryer

to mention but a few

InkSlinger67

trad wrote: »

A long stand

Its very long!

imola94

a bucket of sparks for the angle grinder

a bubble for the spirit level
:D:D:D

muckwarrior

Dean09 wrote: »

He wasn't exactly the sharpest tool in the toolbox.....

Went to school with a guy like that. One day the lads sent him up to the woodwork teacher to ask for a round square, a glass hammer and 12 rubber nails.

El Guapo!

CreepingDeath wrote: »

One of my sisters worked in a shop near a garage.
This young lad came in getting snacks for the lads and asks her if she has any "chocolate ovaries". She fell around the place laughing at the idiot.

That reminds me we also sent him to the shop to ask for strawberry lilets!

ronnie3585

A tin of compression.

A box of elbow grease.

Shacklebolt

I know a man who was working on a building site and was told to fill the dumper with diesel. For anybody who doesn't know, this is a dumper... http://www.milleniumplant.com/uploaded_images/dumper-721225.JPG
He filled the front bucket with petrol and it cost hundreds of euros worth in fuel. Another day he was asked to paint some windows-I'm sure you can work out what happened that time.

InkSlinger67

Shacklebolt wrote: »

...I'm sure you can work out what happened that time.

Dunblane?

snubbleste

Shacklebolt wrote: »

I know a man who was working on a building site and was told to fill the dumper with diesel. For anybody who doesn't know, this is a dumper...

He was told to do something as part of his job and he did it? It's not the employees fault, it's the supervisors' fault.

Shacklebolt

snubbleste wrote: »

He was told to do something as part of his job and he did it? It's not the employees fault, it's the supervisors' fault.

If you were told to 'fill a car with petrol' would you attempt to fill it through the window? Because thats how retarded filling the bucket of the dumper with diesel was.

PogMoThoin

The man in the hardware shop up the street was often sent people to get a "long weight", to which the witty old sod would reply, "ok, wait there, I'll be back............."

11811

Working in bar a while back I got a young fella, who was the glass collector, to polish all the empty kegs for me.

byrner88

in the pub i used to work in we got a new lounge boy to wash the beer mats

Enright

Took me while to find it, but got a laugh from me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2vD-MDslYc&feature=related

Kevin (Bloody) Wlson The Apprentice

sunnyside

Shacklebolt wrote: »

If you were told to 'fill a car with petrol' would you attempt to fill it through the window? Because thats how retarded filling the bucket of the dumper with diesel was.

Some people need very clear and precise instructions. Surely someone would have seen him filling the dumper with petrol, I mean it would probably take a while.

SantryRed

sunnyside wrote: »

Some people need very clear and precise instructions. Surely someone would have seen him filling the dumper with petrol, I mean it would probably take a while.

It was obviously you.

mikemac

Working in a hotel and the bar manager was showing me how to change kegs.
Then he got me to call Diagio to order a fallopian tube

And one of the girls in reception ordered French letters

bronte

Brother was sent to the diy shop to get a fallopian tube when he was 16

Whiskey Devil

mikemac wrote: »

Working in a hotel and the bar manager was showing me how to change kegs.
Then he got me to call Diagio to order a fallopian tube

And one of the girls in reception ordered French letters

That;s the first one that made me laugh. :P

watty

AV company:
Storeboy sent to look for a "Long Weight" for a Milbank Mic Stand.

BBC OB:
I was asked to get a portable Earth. I just looked at the guy and laughed. Oddly though there is such a device (but not used by BBC OB trucks). http://www.radioworld.co.uk/~radio/catalog/mfj934-combined-artificial-earth-p-1843.html and http://remeeus.eu/ham-radio-english/miscellanous/artificial-ground-tuner.html

OT, related:
Building Site, the Clerk wanted to make sure window frames got another coat. He thought he would quietly put an "X" in a corner. The contractor had an apprentice go around after him searching out and painting just the "X"s.

Shipyard:
they would rivet or weld toolboxes of Apprentices to the bench.

fitz0

One lad got sent to the shop for a population tool.

According to my da, when he was an apprentice welder they wer edoing a big job that involved a huge sheet of steel on the floor. They all wore boots with steel heels and toes and one of them ended up welded to the steel sheet on the floor.

El Weirdo

11811 wrote: »

Working in bar a while back I got a young fella, who was the glass collector, to polish all the empty kegs for me.

I used to do that and tell them it was so I didn't get my trousers dirty when I was lifting them.

I sent a lad to the shop for some low fat lard once too...

boardswalker

In accountancy offices, it was common practice to send young trainees to the Companies Office in Dublin Castle for a "Stamp for a Verbal Agreement."

Other one's I have heard of -
send the young guy up to the office for "the key for the yard" - the yard was not eclosed.

Jimdagym

Not a prank, but a funny with a newbie.
On a site my friend was working on, the young lad was sent to the shop for the lunch break. One bloke have him a twenty and asked for a packet of johnny blue and 5 singles with the change. The young lad came back with 5 bags of chips.

Snowie

irelandrover wrote: »

When I worked in a kitchen we had the new guy chopping flour for an hour before the boss caught him

i once sent a commie chef to ask the owners wife had she seen the lobster feed

I also sent a KP to get breaded chicken beeks from the freazer....

4zn76tysfajdxp

muckwarrior wrote: »

Went to school with a guy like that. One day the lads sent him up to the woodwork teacher to ask for a round square, a glass hammer and 12 rubber nails.

I was told to ask for a glass hammer one day in woodwork too. It happened circa five years ago and it's still brought up whenever I meet that particular gang of friends from school.

A Neurotic

When I was on Work Experience in a bacteriology lab the guys "accidentally" dropped some agar plates and let on that we'd all been infected with E. coli or some such. I only believed them for a second :cool:

FOGOFUNK

Working in a hangar in dublin a while back, two apprentices were left sitting on scaffold minding the radio,

Lets call them steve and shane, so anyway, someone texted into the radio station that was tuned in.


About 15 mins later the DJ calls out, "This one is for stephen and shane working in dublin airport."

And preceeded to play this song.....Link

auditek923

when i was about 20 , working in a shop in town, a young lad, no more than 13 came into the shop with a shopping list. he asked me for a pack of condoms, a pack of elastic bands, and a pack of smokes. either someone was playing a trick on him or he had a small ....... ahem

Spore

Chap in a mechanics was told to ask the grumpy old harridan of a forewoman
for a tool called "the menopause"
She punched him. He cried.

Kevin Bacon

best i heard was some guy was going to mop the floor and was sent out for a bottle of ethnic cleanser and if they didn't have that just get a bottle of genocide

Maddison

Was sent to the local shop to get a long stand....same night I was sent to get 1000 ice cubes :mad: Cant believe I fell for two of them in one night....but the fun Ive had with new lounge staff doing the same things

tallus

I got caught out with the skirting ladder one when I was a young lad.

In a place I worked in, the printers used to shrink wrap the apprentices for fun.

Manic Moran

The classic from the world of tanks is to give the FNG a ballpeen hammer and a piece of chalk, and tell him to check for soft spots in the armour. If he finds one, he's to circle it, for the mechanics to have a look at. Return in 20 minutes, find out how many he's found.

Other famous ones are warming up the crosswind sensor (Done by straddling the thing, which is a vertical tube, and rubbing vigorously up and down) and checking the suspension by jumping up and down on the engine deck. (Like a 200lb man will budge a 70-ton tank). Best I've seen so far is to send a guy (2LT in this case) to go looking for the front slope wear gauge, after going through a few bushes and trees. That kept him going almost three weeks.

A nearly-unique feature of the Abrams tank is that it has a jet engine. Get a guy to try to trap the exhaust in a bag for submission to the Army Exhaust Analysis Programme. (There's an Army Oil Analysis Programme). One that sounds fake, but isn't, is to tell a crewman to pump up the tracks.

Have a soldier guard an aircraft flight line overnight at an airshow. Make sure the new guy's the last one on shift. Next morning, have pilots get into aircraft, then one calls over to the other pilot loud enough for the soldier to hear. "Hey Joe! I can't find the keys. Are yours in your jet?"
Cue conversation along the lines of:
"Yeah, mine are here. Why? Aren't yours in the switch?"
"No, they're not here."
"Maybe your crew chief took them for some reason."
"Maybe..." (Wait for crew chief to show up) "Hey Sgt Smith. Where are the keys?"
"In the aircraft, sir"
"No, they're not here."
"They were there when I left last night, Sir"
"Well, they're not here now. We had a guard on these, right?"

You get the idea.
"Oi! Soldier! Get over here! Where the F&$& are the keys to this aircraft? You've been guarding it, right? Where the %^$%# are they?" (Continue until satisfaction is reached)

NTM

Zangetsu

Dean09 wrote: »

That reminds me we also sent him to the shop to ask for strawberry lilets!

They get me with that one in my first week... The old lady behind the counter nearly had a stroke :eek:



EDIT: Oh look 1,001. I've joined the ranks of the anti-social

Dave!

My brother's friend apparently put one of the apprentices in the boot of his car and did donuts around the car park for an hour Kinda OTT, but the guy is kind of a lunatic, so it's quite likely he did it

Shacklebolt

Shacklebolt wrote: »

I know a man who was working on a building site and was told to fill the dumper with diesel. For anybody who doesn't know, this is a dumper... http://www.milleniumplant.com/uploaded_images/dumper-721225.JPG
He filled the front bucket with petrol and it cost hundreds of euros worth in fuel.

I've heard that story so many times, by so many people.

Assez Bien

irelandrover wrote: »

When I worked in a kitchen we had the new guy chopping flour for an hour before the boss caught him

Like the guy at work who was shaving kiwi's for a good half an hour.
The ice cube machine/beer mat stocktake always got the younger one's!!

MoonDancer

God, my parents used to send me off to the neighbours house to ask for a long stand, and sky hooks. I was about 10.
Evil I tell ya, they'd be watching me from the window, and be on the floor laughing when I got home. I still didn't cop on!

Tell them to go to the shop and ask for clitoris drops.

Run_to_da_hills

I use to work for the Irish Light house service, we had some crackers. We would send the appretices to look for the dury free on the Granuale. Another one was to get them to release the fog from the fog locker to test out the fog horns. Bucket of steam another one, skirt board ladders etc.

Coriolanus

In a tailors: Both had them done to me, and did them to others in turn. Ususally on the very first day cause people genuinely have no idea the complicated shiz in a tailors work room, so anything at all sounds reasonable.

Send for tartan thread. (Like the stripey spray pain, sadly manufactures make tartan thread now)

Send for invisible thread. (Used to a machine called a feller "faked" a invisible stitch, now you can buy invisible thread )

Sent for a glass hammer.

Bucket of steam for the steam presser.