Male Posturing around their women

L31mr0d

... I hate it.

If I'm out with my OH and some guy walks up to her when I'm off chatting to someone else it doesn't bother me. As long as there is no physical contact going I couldn't care less. If a woman was talking to me I wouldn't expect my other half to interject.

Regardless of the other males motives or intentions, I trust my OH, I don't expect to have to "protect" her every time another male finds her attractive or tries to talk to her. My OH also doesn't expect me to always have one eye on her when we go out to make sure I can let them know I'm with her.

Yet, COUNTLESS guys I know are like this. I honestly feel like making monkey noises at them when they do it. Since I've been a teenager I've seen countless guys do the whole, interrupt the conversation, put the arm around the girlfriend, inflate their chest... as if performing some primal ownership ritual of their woman.

Even friends, I'll be talking to them, and they'll keep looking over at their OH... then when a guy goes over to talk to them they go "hold on, back in a sec"... just to go over, show they are with that girl (with the usual random kiss on the cheek, or arm around the shoulder) and offer to get them a drink or something to have a pseudo purpose for the whole display.

It just seems so primal and unnecessary. Where is the trust in their OH, or trust in the civility of males. What do they expect is going to happen, that the guy, thinking the woman isn't with someone, is going to put her over his shoulder and run out the door with her.

Do any of yous do this around your girlfriends or wives? What do you think of males that do? Any women reading, do you expect your boyfriends/husbands to do this for you, or do you view it as pointless machismo

shellyboo

L31mr0d wrote: »

What do they expect is going to happen, that the guy, thinking the woman isn't with someone, is going to put her over his shoulder and run out the door with her.

I lolled.

I wouldn't expect a guy to do it for me, and I think if it was constant - ie, I couldn't talk to another male without having him come over and "claim" me, I'd be having words.

But there ARE instances where you do genuinely feel uncomfortable - that the guy, despite having been told that you have a boyfriend - will keep flirting or touching, etc. And in that instance, I'd be making "get over here" eyes at the boyfriend to rescue me.

hblock21

L31mr0d wrote: »

... I hate it.

If I'm out with my OH and some guy walks up to her when I'm off chatting to someone else it doesn't bother me. As long as there is no physical contact going I couldn't care less. If a woman was talking to me I wouldn't expect my other half to interject.

Regardless of the other males motives or intentions, I trust my OH, I don't expect to have to "protect" her every time another male finds her attractive or tries to talk to her. My OH also doesn't expect me to always have one eye on her when we go out to make sure I can let them know I'm with her.

Yet, COUNTLESS guys I know are like this. I honestly feel like making monkey noises at them when they do it. Since I've been a teenager I've seen countless guys do the whole, interrupt the conversation, put the arm around the girlfriend, inflate their chest... as if performing some primal ownership ritual of their woman.

Even friends, I'll be talking to them, and they'll keep looking over at their OH... then when a guy goes over to talk to them they go "hold on, back in a sec"... just to go over, show they are with that girl (with the usual random kiss on the cheek, or arm around the shoulder) and offer to get them a drink or something to have a pseudo purpose for the whole display.

It just seems so primal and unnecessary. Where is the trust in their OH, or trust in the civility of males. What do they expect is going to happen, that the guy, thinking the woman isn't with someone, is going to put her over his shoulder and run out the door with her.

Do any of yous do this around your girlfriends or wives? What do you think of males that do? Any women reading, do you expect your boyfriends/husbands to do this for you, or do you view it as pointless machismo

Yes its cringeworthy and I felt abit embarrassed reading your comment as I remember doing it once or twice But now I wouldn't even think of doing something like that! Its her life if she wants to get off with the random stranger....she can!

Gran Hermano

I blame the insecurity of youth, they'll learn.

Pherekydes

I've never been like that. I think it's to do with insecurity. If you're with a real beauty you'd have more to worry about. I have nothing to worry about.

L31mr0d

Gran Hermano wrote: »

I blame the insecurity of youth, they'll learn.

Do they though? I've seen guys in their 30's doing this at parties. I also would put it down to insecurity, but I can't help feeling for the same reasons Stags butt heads and Gorillas beat their chest that some males just give into these instinctual urges (probably the same guys that flare their tail feathers beep their horns at girls on the street) a throwback to a time when mating rights did have to be fought for.

Dord

I think it's more a jealousy or possibly lack of confidence thing. It's hilarious though. :pac:

It certainly wouldn't be something that I would do.

Otis Driftwood

In fairness,women can be just as bad for this kind of thing.

Ive had it in the past that Id be chatting to random females and the OH at the time would come over and ram her tongue down my neck.

Ive never been this way inclined though and when I see guys do it I find it terribly cringeworthy.

Insecurity is a wholly unattractive thing.

Black Swan

L31mr0d wrote: »

Any women reading, do you expect your boyfriends/husbands to do this for you, or do you view it as pointless machismo

Ha! First time I've snooped on this forum.

I'm not someone's property, so public demonstrations of possessiveness are not wanted. Then again... on the rare occasion when some random bloke in a pub fails to get the message from me (especially if they're drunk), its nice to have the cavalry arrive to save the day.

Now avoiding public demos of possessiveness should not be confused with a desire to avoid closeness. I like to be close to someone I care about and show affection, while at the same time respecting their need for space when appropriate. Sometimes this wanting to be close occurs in public, but you know the difference between that and someone defending their possessions or territory.

It's not just men that show public displays of possessiveness. Many women do too, when there's a lack of trust and a lass makes moves on her OH.

Khannie

I'm not gonna give details on this in case anyone is reading , but the fella of a girl I'm friends with is a total disaster for this. Absolutely hillarious like. I don't really know him at all but I think he's a COMPLETE gob****e because of it. Now she's absolutely crackin' looking and a really sound girl to boot but he should either trust her or get the f*ck out IMO.

I would interject if I felt my wife felt uncomfortable. Otherwise she's just having a chat with someone who is either just having a chat with her or wasting their time. No harm either way.

Cows Go µ

I know my boyfriend would be really jealous like that, which I think is cute, but I know he would never come over and interupt just because of that. But he got used to it pretty fast, I'm doing maths in college and I'm technically the only girl in my class (there are some that come into some of my classes but they aren't on the same course) and most of my friends are guys and I'm really sociable so I'm always out with them. I can't say anything because I get jealous too, but I'm more realistic, I got jealous of the girl who used to be in love with him and they used to be really really good friends. I know I used to interject but that was at a time when I was really sick and down and insecure, I'm loads better now but have yet to have been around them together since. I'd say now I'd be completely grand. It was definitely insecurity for me. I was at a place where I could barely understand how he could stay with me.

OldGoat

L31mr0d wrote: »

Do they though? I've seen guys in their 30's doing this at parties.

Don't confuse age with maturity. A large number of 30+ people are very immature.

Wibbs

Obviously if some guy is acting the maggot you go over and try to diffuse it. Otherwise I don't care. The other aspect of this is some women actually like this and want the guy to act like that. Those particular people may say they don't but if you're completely open and trusting all the time, they get twitchy. Been my experience anyway and not just with the younger women. I'd say there's some subtle throwback to our animal natures with stuff like this. Like the rest of us I've noted insecure guys tend to be the worse for this.

Noffles

I've caught myself doing this not the extremes mentioned here but it has been done.... most of the time though I wouldn't mind really but the odd time you just know the situation isn't too cool and would feel compelled to pop over and say hi... but that's me.

norrie rugger

shellyboo wrote: »

I lolled.

I wouldn't expect a guy to do it for me, and I think if it was constant - ie, I couldn't talk to another male without having him come over and "claim" me, I'd be having words.

But there ARE instances where you do genuinely feel uncomfortable - that the guy, despite having been told that you have a boyfriend - will keep flirting or touching, etc. And in that instance, I'd be making "get over here" eyes at the boyfriend to rescue me.

That is basically the deal between myself and herself.
A little signal to call in the back up. Works both ways mind

giddybootz

norrie rugger wrote: »

That is basically the deal between myself and herself.
A little signal to call in the back up. Works both ways mind

Yeah that is the perfect medium. Possessive guys stalking around their burds is so lame!

Snowie

ok so some men are still figuring out if you rub to sticks together, stuff happen's.

If blokes feel the need to exercise there there plumage so be it....

i dont really care there problem not mine....

Gran Hermano

Anyone else going to confess to having wound up one of these male peacocks
in the past just for fun?

Wibbs

Oh yes, more times than I care to recant. Luckily I'm so weedy looking that they usually felt bad about getting heavy.:D

SoupyNorman

I would never do it, would'nt even think about it. The GF is a flirty individual (as I am) and she would attract a bit of attention (I dont lol) but for me it's a compliment. God I cringe when I see men act in such a way...It's down to trust, You either got it or you dont!

Theres a notorious couple I know, they're both serial cheaters, no good for each other, always breaking up and then getting back together. Nobody views it as a serious relationship, but this guy is a chronic chest inflater/ interjecter..The girl can barely get a drink off a male bartender lest he be holding her hand, for me there is zero trust there, maybe even in the minus!! Most nights they just end up sitting in the corner of the nightclub just staring at everyone on the dancefloor. I cant fathom why they come out at all!

Greyham

as has been said before , guys who do it are generally insecure and trying really hard to impress, the idea of having to protect ones woman is something sort of stupid , you should be confident enough in your partner not to have to protect her like a sought after bag of magic beans among some cavemen