Quick 'Uns

Rufus.T.Firefly

I went for an Indian last night.

The waiter came over and said "Curry OK?"

I said "Go on then, one song then you can sod off".

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Have you ever wondered about those people who pay a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water?

Try spelling Evian backwards.......

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Whenever my uncle tries to squeeze into a tight gap left between two parked cars, he starts to shake uncontrollably.

I think he suffers from parking zones disease.

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A moustache walks up to a bouncer and says

"alrite mate, any chance of letting us in?",

the bouncer says

"sorry mate, not tonight, you're clearly off your face"

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I woke up in the hospital the other day and the doctor said,

"I've got some good news and bad news."

"What's the bad news?" I asked.

"You've been in a car crash and you're paralysed from the waist down.

Your girlfriend died on impact and your son is in a coma showing no response."

"Blimey that is bad news!" I said.

"What's the good?"

"You're favourite to win X Factor next year."



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I noticed on the Bookie's window:

Open Sunday 11-2.

I'll have a tenner on that.

He was open last Sunday.

Nikko

Excellent selection Rufus T. - especially the 'parking zones' one. I'm gonna use that one if ya don't mind!!

:P

Rufus.T.Firefly

Nikko wrote: »

Excellent selection Rufus T. - especially the 'parking zones' one. I'm gonna use that one if ya don't mind!!

:P

No problem Nikko....keep em coming