Stupidest Facebook status visible right now

Fizman · 08-10-2009 1:46am

amazon is evil. showing me things i might like. amazon KNOWS i have no self control. credit card money is not real money so i just click on things and i end up buying 18 dvds. i really dont even know what i just bought

.....and I pretty sure she's an accountant!

-Leelo- · 08-10-2009 1:59am

No matter what people say,i still believe i saw a dead penguin on the side of the road in mayo at the weekend

Crazy bastard! :pac:

The_B_Man · 08-10-2009 3:21am

^^ lol how do u know dave?

tell him tom cruise says hello, if ur in the nest with him!!

Executive Steve · 08-10-2009 4:00am

Xxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxx **** EVOLUTION! IT IS ALL A LIE, DARWIN CHATS ****. AND FRANCIS BACON WROTE SHAKESPEARES PLAYS TRUS SHAKESPEARE WAS A ILLITATE CRACK HEAD

Canis Lupus · 08-10-2009 6:52am

Canis Lupus wrote: »

"Officially single. On my birthday. Wow."

Typed by a girl who goes out with a cheating transvestite who beats her up.

She's a chav and will be back with him by tomorrow. Her status updates are where the writers for Eastenders get their ideas.

And the latest update is:

Y do i av to b an emotional person n feel sorry 4 people who r in the wrong. As people say i av no backbone. I just put it down to bein too darn nice and big heart. Then afta i feel like a twat

Apparently he is sorry and wants her back. I give her another couple of days to relent and give in to him.

-Leelo- · 08-10-2009 12:04pm

The_B_Man wrote: »

^^ lol how do u know dave?

tell him tom cruise says hello, if ur in the nest with him!!

Ha Small world, been on a few drunken nights out together over the yrs. Funny guy!

patrickc · 08-10-2009 12:32pm

is poorly and needs vicks rubbed on her chest

or another

is pumped for the weekends hen in Melbs

Ciaran500 · 14-10-2009 3:10pm

Had to bump this for this one.

"left the dole office without his wallet. Went back to get it, was asked what it looked like. "it says bad mother****er on it". Quite possibly the proudest moment of my life."

Fat_Fingers · 14-10-2009 3:20pm

Elliemental wrote: »

Why, oh why, would anyone type this? Am I old fashioned, am I just an old fuddy duddy? But why would anyone want to know this? I mean, are they literally doing this as they type? Have they taken their laptop to the loo with them? Am I missing the point? I opened a facebook page so my dad could share a load of photos with me. That was less than a month ago, and now I have all these people adding me, and I haven`t a clue who they are!

i take it then you are not a regular poster on www.ratemypoo.com

ChillyJilly · 14-10-2009 3:49pm

NAME hasnt done washing in aaages and has no clean knickers

Bad thing is, I'm only facebook friends with her as I'm friends with her boyfriend... lucky guy :rolleyes:

OakeyDokey · 06-12-2009 1:39pm

Anatidaephobia — the fear that somewhere, somehow, a duck is watching you

That_Guy · 06-12-2009 1:47pm

I actually can't study. I'm sooo gonna fail

Clearly yes if you're on Facebook telling people about it. Nobody cares.

Can't wait to sleep in tomorrow.

Pathetic. Nobody cares.

Tucan tomoro night at the crane lane and its free souuuuuuuuuuuuuuuund

Nobody cares.

baalthor · 06-12-2009 2:05pm

One person on my friend's list is a big follower of Jesus while another one has an um ..active love life. The contrast between their fb posts is funny

Him: Just returned from the Jesus Festival. Feel so blessed to see The Lord in action ..

Her: Just woke up - totally wrekked after all nite session getting hamered by bf :-) -

But they both make a change from everyone else announcing they've become "Queen (or King) of Compost":eek: - listen to yourself! compost is rotted sh1t FFS, who wants to be the Queen of rotten sh1t ???

Jim_Are_Great · 06-12-2009 2:19pm

That_Guy wrote: »

Tucan tomoro night at the crane lane and its free souuuuuuuuuuuuuuuund

Nobody cares.

Swear to God, I was just about to put hers up.

Asmodean · 06-12-2009 3:01pm

See this is what bothers me. Why do people have 'Friends' on their page that they don't even know well! OF course anything they say is going to be annoying. I just have my real friends on mine so I generally find their updates never annoy me!

Carsinian Thau · 06-12-2009 5:20pm

I really need to learn how to spell. It would make this whole writing thing a lot easier...

Just spent a lot of time that I should have been using for sleeping on this: http://www.whoisthemonkey.com/games/33/demolition-city
Totally worth it though...

Why I lose even the most basic of mathematical abilities as soon as I reach the till in the shop?

All from the same person. I didn't know people could be so boring.

tman · 06-12-2009 5:35pm

"@ least dance music always makes u feel betta"

Think it must be time to purge some unwanteds from my friend list again:p

MizzLolly · 06-12-2009 5:36pm

This thread is so nasty.

At least do these people a favour and remove them from your friends list! :rolleyes:

lol5605 · 06-12-2009 5:41pm

Too lazy to go through the whole thread to see if this was posted.
http://www.lamebook.com/ Some funny stuff on that.

John Mason · 06-12-2009 6:18pm

Art Basel Conversations this morning: “Collector Focus: Latin America” features prominent art collectors, César Cervantes from Mexico, Jay Khalifeh from Brazil, and Juan and Patricia Vergez from Argentina exploring the dynamic way in which Latin Americas' collecting scene has grown an ...d international ized in the las..