Funny *nix related humor

Naikon

So, I will start with this classic:
Is your son a computer hacker?

Another good one:

To solve a problem in Windows, reboot.
To solve a problem in Linux, be root!

Keep em flowing:D

Dartz

Turn your volume right up. Then type the following in terminal. The howls of the damned.

cat /vmlinuz > /dev/audio1

Malice

BopNiblets

Another xkcd one:

Khannie

Love the sudo make me a sandwich one. I think I saw that posted up here ages ago.

FruitLover

http://catb.org/jargon/html/koans.html

Steveire

This one's as old as the hills.

locate;
talk;
date;
cd;
strip;
look;
touch;
finger;
unzip;
uptime;
gawk;
head;
ifup;
mount;
fsck;
gasp;
more;
yes;
yes;
yes;
more;
umount;
make clean;
sleep

cornbb

Khannie wrote: »

Love the sudo make me a sandwich one. I think I saw that posted up here ages ago.

I thought of that one the instant I saw the thread title

Naikon

Not strictly *NIX, but funny-*
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UNIX Airways
Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be building.

Air DOS
Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump on again, and so on ...

Mac Airlines
All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just shut up.

Windows Air
The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

Windows NT Air
Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.

Linux Air
Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself. When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy of the Seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do what with the seat?"

Malice

cornbb wrote: »

I thought of that one the instant I saw the thread title

So did I, I was just lucky that no one else had posted it .