Stephen Gately has died! ----(mod warning post #6)

pikachucheeks

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

I bet there are still people very afraid to come out in small town Ireland. We haven't come as far as we like to tell ourselves we have.

Oh, definitely! and it's very sad.

I was talking to a girl the other day who was telling me a story about her parents' best friends, who were a gay couple, in their 50's.

One of the men was involved in an accident and died. At the funeral, none of the dead man's family knew who his partner was, because they were unaware he was gay. They'd been together for about thirty years...

WindSock

Did he get married? Where did that happen?

My name is URL

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

I bet there are still people very afraid to come out in small town Ireland. We haven't come as far as we like to tell ourselves we have.

Well my mate came out in a small town and nobody wanted him burned at the stake or exiled because of it

If people are afraid to come out then it's their own choice that's holding them back, not everyone else

IvyTheTerrible

My name is URL wrote: »

Well my mate came out in a small town and nobody wanted him burned at the stake or exiled because of it

If people are afraid to come out then it's their own choice that's holding them back, not everyone else

Well there is an American tourist who is currently a paralysed because of an attack in Sligo where he had the **** kicked out of him for being openly affectionate with his partner.

My name is URL

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

Well there is an American tourist who is currently a paralysed because of an attack in Sligo where he had the **** kicked out of him for being openly affectionate with his partner.

That's a rarity though, and the same could be said for any other person that's been attacked for belonging to a minority group

There's racists, bigots and homophobes all over the world.. but you don't see black guys painting their faces white or protestants going to catholic masses to avoid confrontation

Loopy

One of my best mates who is 30 is gay. All his friends know but he refuses to tell his parents... He is in a very happy relationship and the pressure he puts himself under by not telling them is crazy. I cannot understand why he wont tell them, they are lovely, open people..

LookingFor

WindSock wrote: »

Did he get married? Where did that happen?

They had a UK civil ceremony in 06. Three years prior they had a 'vegas do' apparently, but I'm not sure if that counts so much.

My name is URL

My name is URL wrote: »

That's a rarity though, and the same could be said for any other person that's been attacked for belonging to a minority group

There's racists, bigots and homophobes all over the world.. but you don't see black guys painting their faces white or protestants going to catholic masses to avoid confrontation

Hahaha, you try living in a small town in the North and see what it's like to be openly gay. I wouldn't want to come out where I used to live. I couldn't blame anyone for staying in the closet for their own safety.

My name is URL

[quote=[Deleted User];62521526]Hahaha, you try living in a small town in the North and see what it's like to be openly gay. I wouldn't want to come out where I used to live. I couldn't blame anyone for staying in the closet for their own safety.[/QUOTE]

Well I'm only talking about down here.

I have no idea what mindset the people of Norn Iron have, but by all accounts they're not exactly the epitome of tolerant

MizzLolly

pikachucheeks wrote: »

Oh, definitely! and it's very sad.

I was talking to a girl the other day who was telling me a story about her parents' best friends, who were a gay couple, in their 50's.

One of the men was involved in an accident and died. At the funeral, none of the dead man's family knew who his partner was, because they were unaware he was gay. They'd been together for about thirty years...

****ing hell!!! That's so sad. And so unnecessary.

My name is URL

My name is URL wrote: »

Well I'm only talking about down here.

I have no idea what mindset the people of Norn Iron have, but by all accounts they're not exactly the epitome of tolerant

No, not exactly. But even in Dublin, two gay men openly kissing or holding hands is not a common sight. A lot of my gay friends refrain from showing much affection in public in case they get set upon by skangers.

pikachucheeks

MizzLolly wrote: »

****ing hell!!! That's so sad. And so unnecessary.

I know
It's very sad. The poor man, on the day of his partner's funeral, he had no one for support, because none of the man's family had known about him.

Whosbetter?

[quote=[Deleted User];62522345]No, not exactly. But even in Dublin, two gay men openly kissing or holding hands is not a common sight. A lot of my gay friends refrain from showing much affection in public in case they get set upon by skangers.[/quote]

In all fairness though, 2 blokes slobbering over each other in public would be objectionable to lots of people.

Whosbetter?

Whosbetter? wrote: »

In all fairness though, 2 blokes slobbering over each other in public would be objectionable to lots of people.

Yeh but I bet you wouldn't have much of a problem seeing two hot girls kissing the face off each other though eh.

My name is URL

Whosbetter? wrote: »

In all fairness though, 2 blokes slobbering over each other in public would be objectionable to lots of people.

I can't even stand two straight people been overly affectionate in public.

Turns the stomach it does

:pac:

walshb

I know it's early days, but the big question on everyones lips should be:
Who gets his money?

That_Guy

walshb wrote: »

I know it's early days, but the big question on everyones lips should be:
Who gets his money?

Hopefully charity.

That_Guy

My name is URL wrote: »

That's a rarity though, and the same could be said for any other person that's been attacked for belonging to a minority group

There's racists, bigots and homophobes all over the world.. but you don't see black guys painting their faces white or protestants going to catholic masses to avoid confrontation

Unfortunately it's not as rare as you think. I've seen it happening a lot.

Agree with your second point though.

Shocking

Shocking!

RIP Stephen. It is a young age to die. Thoughts go out to the Family and Friends in what is a difficult time

Hydroquinone

walshb wrote: »

I know it's early days, but the big question on everyones lips should be:
Who gets his money?

Why would his widower not get it?

Sephiroth_dude

RIP,too young to die.

seamus

Hydroquinone wrote: »

Why would his widower not get it?

It would depend on where he was legally resident, where his assets reside and if he had a will or not.

To take the standard case - he's an Irish resident, all his money stored in Irish banks and no will, everything would go to his parents. The partnership/marriage isn't recognised in this country so his partner would get nothing.

Sharpshooter

seamus wrote: »

It would depend on where he was legally resident, where his assets reside and if he had a will or not.

To take the standard case - he's an Irish resident, all his money stored in Irish banks and no will, everything would go to his parents. The partnership/marriage isn't recognised in this country so his partner would get nothing.

I think Stephen would have been aware of that and would have sought advice from his solicitor before the marriage.

I would imagine he would have drawn up a will,it would be the natural thing to do when making the decision to get married.

He struck me as a positive person, who by all accounts was very much in love.

So I think his first priority would have been to see that his husband and his family would be taken care of financially in the result of unforeseen circumstances, ie his death.

Just my opinion though.

Whosbetter?

Deleted User wrote: »

Yeh but I bet you wouldn't have much of a problem seeing two hot girls kissing the face off each other though eh.

Not unless one of them was my daughter though.:eek:

:pac:

Shoop

What sickens me about this whole thing is that the people who'd have insulted him over and over/made jokes etc if there was a thread about people's opinions of him are the same one's who are all "Ohhh too young, a true genius RIP"

OutlawPete

Shoop wrote: »

What sickens me about this whole thing is that the people who'd have insulted him over and over/made jokes etc if there was a thread about people's opinions of him are the same one's who are all "Ohhh too young, a true genius RIP"

Why do you think the people who would have insulted him would bother to RIP him? Can people on Boards not express their condolences without others questioning their sincerity?

To say it "Sickens" you would suggest some kind of proof that these are the same people - do you have any?

walshb

Hydroquinone wrote: »

Why would his widower not get it?

I am sure Andrew is behind the scenes as we speak with his lawyer.
He should have a strong case, but wait and see, once the topic of
money comes up and the will is read or contested, the dirty laundry will
be aired. I hate to sound cynical, but I can see a lot of mud being slung here

Hydroquinone

seamus wrote: »

It would depend on where he was legally resident, where his assets reside and if he had a will or not.

To take the standard case - he's an Irish resident, all his money stored in Irish banks and no will, everything would go to his parents. The partnership/marriage isn't recognised in this country so his partner would get nothing.

I thought that would be the case. But where were Stephen Gately and his other half and their money were resident, I wonder?
If the pair and their money were resident in the UK and their money was there, then any will Gately had made before he got married would be null and void, same as for anyone who gets married. All your assets go to your surviving spouse.

And surely, a big driving force behind the creation of civil partership legislation in countries where they have it was to provide for inheritance legislation to be on a par with traditional marriages. So anyone who was a citizen of a country where there are no same sex marriages would have to be barking mad not to have explicitly written a will in his spouse's favour, as a sort of belt and braces approach. Time will tell, I suppose.

But as walshb says, there will be some amount of legal shenanigins going on now.

Clare Bear

I just saw on the news that the rest of the band are going to stay in the church on Friday night because his Mother said he wouldn't like to be alone.

I just think that's such a lovely thing to do. I guess they get to say their own final goodbyes to him that night.

Louis Walsh is annoying me though, he's on every channel talking about his loss. If he was that upset he wouldn't be going on TV at any given opportunity. Fame hungry as usual :rolleyes:

Radharc na Sleibhte

I could never sleep in a church. Ugh shivers.

Madge

Clare Bear wrote: »

Louis Walsh is annoying me though, he's on every channel talking about his loss. If he was that upset he wouldn't be going on TV at any given opportunity. Fame hungry as usual :rolleyes:

That's exactly what I thought. He also doesn't look that upset either

Clare Bear

Madge wrote: »

That's exactly what I thought. He also doesn't look that upset either

I guess his recent cosmetic under eye work doesn't help though, he probably can't look sad now even if he wants to :pac:

Madge

Clare Bear wrote: »

I guess his recent cosmetic under eye work doesn't help though, he probably can't look sad now even if he wants to :pac:

I know, his eyes look v strange

LizT

I wonder if many fans will show up at the funeral.

It's right around the corner from my sister's apartment, so I'm thinking of wandering for a while.

Pretty_Pistol

Clare Bear wrote: »

I just saw on the news that the rest of the band are going to stay in the church on Friday night because his Mother said he wouldn't like to be alone.

That is very sweet. I wouldn't want to be left alone in a church all night either.

lizt wrote: »

I wonder if many fans will show up at the funeral.

It's right around the corner from my sister's apartment, so I'm thinking of wandering for a while.

I hope people stay respectful of the family and keep a distance at least.

Sheepy99

i see a lot of thanks after post 6.....just wondering but are you able to give like a "no" you know to say you disagree

Sharpshooter

Sheepy99 wrote: »

i see a lot of thanks after post 6.....just wondering but are you able to give like a "no" you know to say you disagree

No Sheepy99, it was tried before and it didn't work.

The best thing to do if you feel strongly enough is to post your disagreement and explain why.

Pretty_Pistol

Pretty_Pistol wrote: »

That is very sweet. I wouldn't want to be left alone in a church all night either.



I hope people stay respectful of the family and keep a distance at least.

I agree that people should stay respectful but I hope that fans do show up to pay their respects. I really think that's what he would have wanted as he seemed to love his career and his fans. I hope it's done in a dignified way.

OutlawPete

Clare Bear wrote: »

Louis Walsh is annoying me though, he's on every channel talking about his loss. If he was that upset he wouldn't be going on TV at any given opportunity. Fame hungry as usual :rolleyes:

Couldn't disagree more. I think he is doing interviews to take the pressure off the family. They must be bugged to f*** with the media hounding them for interviews and also it might just shut the tabloids up with their snide speculative bull if they have a few quotes from Louis instead.

Madge wrote: »

That's exactly what I thought. He also doesn't look that upset either

What station were you watching? I just watched the Sky News live interview and he was close to tears throughout - the man looks lost. Sometimes I think people see what they want to see.

On a side note he has a little pop at solicitor at one point (Gerald Kean?) for contacting the papers with the news of Stephen's death before they contacted him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfZ0kOSNisc

Sharpshooter

He's just been on Sky News and was indeed upset.
Sure he said Stephen was his best friend and I have no reason to doubt him.
It's too easily refuted by the people who knew both of them.

Sky are covering the funeral from 10 am on Saturday.

MizzLolly

Awh poor Louis. Fair play to him for talking. I don't think I could do it myself.

khmk

God bless you Tiny Dancer.

Handsome Bob

Anyone watching Sky News? The Daily Mail hits a new low.

walshb

LZ5by5 wrote: »

Anyone watching Sky News? The Daily Mail hits a new low.

How?

Because the Mail may be saying what a lot of folks are thinking?

I read the report and nothing in it is wholly untrue or inaccurate.
They are simply saying what may be on many peoples lips

Handsome Bob

walshb wrote: »

How?

Because the Mail may be saying what a lot of folks are thinking?

I read the report and nothing in it is wholly untrue or inaccurate.
They are simply saying what may be on many peoples lips

They make an unfounded accusation that civil partnerships are doomed, how is that not inaccurate?

LZ5by5

LZ5by5 wrote: »

Anyone watching Sky News? The Daily Mail hits a new low.

See my post about Sky News and The Sun being from the same corporation. Of course Sky will have a pop at the Mail, they're media rivals.

walshb

LZ5by5 wrote: »

They make an unfounded accusation that civil partnerships are doomed, how is that not inaccurate?

Gately was gay, a public figure and his premature death in the circumstances which it occurred will be talked about, discussed and debated. All they are doing is talking about it. They are printing the questions that others are thinking.

Like: If Gately and Cowles were married and happy, how come another man was back with hem, he and Cowles in the bed and Gately on the sofa?

I have no issue with it, there's no law against it, but it will be queried and folks will want to know what sort of lifestyle they led.

Like it or not, the life of a gay man or gay men does have a very seedy
reputation. And, more so than the average married heterosexual couple.
It's a twilight zone of hedonism. Agai, I couldn't care less and I have nothing against it, but it's there to be discussed, and they are cashing in

OutlawPete

walshb wrote: »

It's a twilight zone of hedonism.

That's The George your thinking of ..

He was Gay .. not a Pimp for God sake.

Handsome Bob

walshb wrote: »

Gately was gay, a public figure and his premature death in the circumstances which it occurred will be talked about, discussed and debated. All they are doing is talking about it. They are printing the questions that others are thinking.

I have no problem for this incident to be discussed to use this for a thinly veiled attack on homosexuality is low, even by the Mail's standards.

Like: If Gately and Cowles were married and happy, how come another man was back with hem, he and Cowles in the bed and Gately on the sofa?

I never saw this before, do you have a link? Respectable source please.

Like it or not, the life of a gay man or gay men does have a very seedy reputation. And, more so than the average married heterosexual couple. It's a twilight zone of hedonism. Agai, I couldn't care less and I have nothing against it, but it's there to be discussed, and they are cashing in

Perhaps in showbiz, but having said that there has been just as many heterosexual celebrities that have been caught up in a seedy lifestyle as there have been of homosexual celebrities.

herya

walshb wrote: »

Like: If Gately and Cowles were married and happy, how come another man was back with hem, he and Cowles in the bed and Gately on the sofa?

But "If Gately and his wife were married and happy, how come another woman was back with them, she and the wife in the bed and Gately on the sofa?" doesn't sound so bad, does it?

First, his death most likely had nothing in common with how he spent the night.

Second, even if he had collapsed in the middle of a threesome, what difference does it make if he was with man or woman, single or plural?

Like it or not, the life of a gay man or gay men does have a very seedy
reputation.

In your eyes maybe.