Breastfeeding in Public - my kid objects-Exhibitionism or a Right.(Mod Note Post 139)

T-Square

CDfm wrote: »

Not so fast, my daughter was embarressed at teenage boys gawking and I can see her point as a teenage girl and was embareesed cos the teenage boys wre there. Breasts are sexual - she knows that and they know that. Go figure.

So what if your socially stunted teenage daughter was embarrassed,
tell her to build a bridge and get over herself.

BREAST FEEDING IN PUBLIC TUT TUT TUT :rolleyes::rolleyes:

I recommend you evaluate your role as parent.

kowloon

amacachi wrote: »

Did the establishment in question not have a notice saying "Only food and drink bought on these premises may be consumed on these premises."?

That's the first thing that sprung to mind, maybe the second.

metrovelvet

Khannie wrote: »

To be honest, I hadn't considered this until it was pointed out. If my son did what your daughter did I'd tell him to pipe down and cop on. Different strokes for different folks and all that. Just saying what I would have done.

Are good old fashioned clips around the ear acceptable in these circumstances?

CDfm

fatmammycat wrote: »

I don't actually believe you, you're changing your story every few lines, you noticed, you didn't until it was pointed out, you were okay with it, you're not, she unhooked her bra, she plopped them out. Nonsense.

i am not really bothered if you believe me or not

fatmammycat wrote: »

Or validation for some poor parenting.

metrovelvet wrote: »

He's trying to get validation for his daughter's rude behavior.

tut tut - she lives with her ma most of the time

Herbal Deity

krudler wrote: »

I think its more of a babies right to be fed by its mother where and when she pleases and not for fear of offending a few small minded people like yourself, and breastfeeding is the most natural thing in the world, its the breasts primary function, just because society has sexualised breasts doesnt make it wrong to feed a baby the way women have been doing it since the dawn of time

/facepalm.

Just look at what you just quoted, seriously:

Herbal Deity wrote:

I don't have a problem with it, but those who defend it vehemently and spout crap like "breastfeeding is the most natural thing in the world" irritate me to no end.

It's not exhibitionism, nor is it a right. It's a matter of taste, and people are perfectly entitled to not like it done in their presence.

And a closer look:

Herbal Deity wrote:

I don't have a problem with it

Maybe a bit larger so it's clear:

Herbal Deity wrote:

I don't have a problem with it

Now, would you still agree that it offends me and that I'm small minded?

This topic seems to evoke some of the most fanatical, irrational responses I've ever seen from people.

I think CDfm should have told his daughter to be more respectful and tolerant, but what's hugely ironic is the level of intolerance to the perfectly understandable unease in this situation.

Why can't this be discussed calmly and rationally? Why does every second post have to be a holier-than-thou, thinly veiled insult against those who feel a little uneasy with it?

fatmammycat

CDfm wrote: »

i am not really bothered if you believe me or not





tut tut - she lives with her ma most of the time

So what? She was with you at the time. Way to pass the buck.

CDfm

Herbal Deity wrote: »

I think CDfm should have told his daughter to be more respectful and tolerant, but what's hugely ironic is the level of intolerance to the perfectly understandable unease in this situation.

Or I could have brought her to the local pub for lunch which I decided against because of the rugby match.

Why can't this be discussed calmly and rationally? Why does every second post have to be a holier-than-thou, thinly veiled insult against those who feel a little uneasy with it?

I agree.

I have no probs with mims breastfeeding in public places but on this one occasion this one person decides to treat a resteraunt like her lving room.

There is a balance and maybe she has gone beyond it.

Herbal Deity

CDfm wrote: »

I have no probs with mims breastfeeding in public places but on this one occasion this one person decides to treat a resteraunt like her lving room.

There is a balance and maybe she has gone beyond it.

I would disagree here. But then again, I would have no problem living in a nudist society.

I'm not quite sure what your issue is. Is it that she exposed too much or?

fatmammycat

CDfm wrote: »

Or I could have brought her to the local pub for lunch which I decided against because of the rugby match.



I agree.

I have no probs with mims breastfeeding in public places but on this one occasion this one person decides to treat a resteraunt like her lving room.

There is a balance and maybe she has gone beyond it.

Who decides this balance? You? As more than one person has remarked- in a non hysterical manner I should point out- you had the option to correct your daughter on her childish 'EW!' an option to desexualize the situation for her, and an option to look away if the sight of a breast feeding(in public) mother gives you an attack of the vapours. But nope, you posted on a public forum, describing this woman as almost page 3 and in DETAIL how she fed her child, albeit changing the story each time to suit your agenda.

shellyboo

What is now calling out to me and making ME very uneasy is the fact that she was blonde and attractive. Methinks you and your daughter would have had less of an issue had a stereotypical Irish mammy type wandered in and started to feed her baby.

CDfm, I know you say you don't have a problem with it but it obvioulsy made you uneasy, probably because she was attractive. People don't like being reminded of the basic function of sex (babies) when they're attracted to someone or aroused (not saying you were).

It is a dire shame that you didn't address your daughter's attitude. Think about when she has kids - is she going to reject breastfeeding them (which is best) because she has developed this "eww" attitude without any guidance from her parents? If she does manage to get past this, will you have the same disapproving stance when she needs to feed her child, your grandchild, and you're all out for a meal in a family restaurant?

That woman, unless she was up on the bar with a baby on one breast and a tassle on the other, did nothing even close to exhibitionism. She can't help being attractive and a mother. It's not her problem if that offends people or makes them uneasy. She shouldn't have to hide herself away because if it.

CDfm

fatmammycat wrote: »

Who decides this balance? You? As more than one person has remarked- in a non hysterical manner I should point out- you had the option to correct your daughter on her childish 'EW!' an option to desexualize the situation for her, and an option to look away if the sight of a breast feeding(in public) mother gives you an attack of the vapours. But nope, you posted on a public forum, describing this woman as almost page 3 and in DETAIL how she fed her child, albeit changing the story each time to suit your agenda.

I am a guy and Im not being hysterical. I described her as almost page 3 cos thats how it was.

No objections from me by the way on breastfeeding and its health benefits etc are great for kids.

I just relayed what I observed and of course in normal circumstances most guys have no objections to a good looking woman showing off.

This is Ireland -we have crap weather so as a culture we are not used to public displays of breasts. I dont know the law but it doesnt seem to have been illegal to have a topless barmaid in Limerick.

So if you wouldnt normally do a full display in a department store -why do so when breastfeeding. Lots of other breastfeeding mothers do it discreetly and I wouldnt even notice it and nobody would bat an eye.

It was because it was soo different that it caught my attention and because it was the exception.

Cultural behavior changes because of exceptions and this was a bit different.

fatmammycat

"I just relayed what I observed and of course in normal circumstances most guys have no objections to a good looking woman showing off."

I am confused, are you now saying she was showing off?

CDfm

shellyboo wrote: »

What is now calling out to me and making ME very uneasy is the fact that she was blonde and attractive. Methinks you and your daughter would have had less of an issue had a stereotypical Irish mammy type wandered in and started to feed her baby.

I was actually unease starting the thread and saying the lady was attractive.

CDfm, I know you say you don't have a problem with it but it obvioulsy made you uneasy, probably because she was attractive. People don't like being reminded of the basic function of sex (babies) when they're attracted to someone or aroused (not saying you were).

I was trying to balance it out nutritional issues aside. If she had been sitting directly accross from me I might have blushed or made a smart comment. I am sure I am not the only guy this happens too.

It is a dire shame that you didn't address your daughter's attitude. Think about when she has kids - is she going to reject breastfeeding them (which is best) because she has developed this "eww" attitude

In time I am sure we will discuss it as we are close.

That woman, unless she was up on the bar with a baby on one breast and a tassle on the other, did nothing even close to exhibitionism. She can't help being attractive and a mother. It's not her problem if that offends people or makes them uneasy. She shouldn't have to hide herself away because if it.

lol shelly -you have a way with words.

CDfm

Herbal Deity wrote: »

I'm not quite sure what your issue is. Is it that she exposed too much or?

Maybe so

fatmammycat wrote: »

I am confused, are you now saying she was showing off?

Thats not for me to say.

Khannie

CDfm wrote: »

Thats not for me to say.

Question dodger.

In your opinion was she showing off?

CDfm

Khannie wrote: »

Question dodger.

In your opinion was she showing off?

The thought crossed my mind -as did dare and bet.

Khannie

Honestly, I don't see how she could be as exposed as you're implying if she were feeding. Even if her breast was out FULLY, the baby is still covering the nipple + a large percentage of the rest.

Again though, I'm going to return to your original post and point out that your daughter was not complaining about the amount of flesh on show, but rather that there was breastfeeding (of any kind) occuring in the vacinity of her eating, which I think is *utterly* ridiculous.

I will go on record as saying that a little bit of discretion helps spare the blushes, but, for example, I got talking to a lady on the train one day who was sitting opposite me, also an attractive lady. She decided to breastfeed in front of me. Now it wasn't "tits out" or whatever and I did that "omg don't lose eye contact" thing, but I was delighted that she was comfortable enough to do it tbh.

CDfm

Khannie wrote: »

Honestly, I don't see how she could be as exposed as you're implying if she were feeding. Even if her breast was out FULLY, the baby is still covering the nipple + a large percentage of the rest.

One baby -two breasts. I thought that was fairly obvious.

Khannie

CDfm wrote: »

One baby -two breasts. I thought that was fairly obvious.

I must have missed that. Ok, that's a bit much IMO.

fatmammycat

Oh please. Now I know you're adding arms and legs to your ridiculous story, 'as a dare and a bet' Really?
Tthere was NO mention of two breasts being exposed earlier, you said she 'unhooked' one side of her bra. In fact your original post made no reference to her 'sauntering in' either, just that she was sitting at the next table feeding her child and your daugher had a 'EW" moment because she felt uncomfortable that some teenager boys might giggle at seeing a woman use her breasts for what they were designed to do.
Seriously CDfm, next time you see a woman breast feeding her child just mind your own business. And maybe desexualise breasts for your soon to be adult daughter.

Khannie

fatmammycat wrote: »

you said she 'unhooked' one side of her bra.

Yeah, that is true. How do you explain that? It does look like your story is changing as time goes on (and I'm gonna just come out and say this, that makes it seem like either bullsh*t or trolling to me).

edit: While you just said "unhooked", another poster was very specific in saying "unhooked one side of her nursing bra" and you did not correct that. I think it's fairly clear everyone thought you meant that she unhooked one side of a nursing bra.

edit: Further editing: You also say in one post that you were "a bit oblivious to it until it was pointed out to me" in one post, yet in another you give a description of her actions...."She came in,sat down,opened her blouse unhooked bra and was off. Casual as anything and had a figure to be proud of.". Those two things are in direct conflict with each other.

fatmammycat

Eventually she will be fully naked on the bar with the baby hanging from one boob and sparkly tassles on the other breast.

3hn2givr7mx1sc

The main question here is, was the woman goodlooking?
Probably posted already but I'm not arsed reading through the thread.

CDfm

I am not a bra expert and it wasnt a maternity bra. If it was Mothercare are getting very daring since Ive been there.

I just cant get this, its my fault, my daughters fault, the young lads fault, if anyone had asked her to cover up a bit it would have been their fault and Irish societies fault.

I would have though some of you fine people would have suggestions on what is appropriate behavior for nursing mothers which is how it should be for everyones comfort. Since when is a discussion verboten.

fatmammycat

If it unhooked from the front and on one side it was very much a nursing bra. What's your point anyway? What is there to discuss? A woman was feeding her baby, pretty discreetly if you didn't notice and you were sitting next to her, but your daughter pointed it out, and once it was pointed out to you you noticed. Is that about it?

CDfm

baz2009 wrote: »

The main question here is, was the woman goodlooking?
Probably posted already but I'm not arsed reading through the thread.

Fit and healthy and blonde.

fatmammycat wrote: »

Eventually she will be fully naked on the bar with the baby hanging from one boob and sparkly tassles on the other breast.

And judgeing from your posts fatmammycat as long as she was breastfeeding that would be acceptable - just dont criticise the mother.

fatmammycat

Strawman, I never said that at all and don't think it.

Warfi

CDfm wrote: »

I would have though some of you fine people would have suggestions on what is appropriate behavior for nursing mothers which is how it should be for everyones comfort. Since when is a discussion verboten.

The first part of this thread, I got the impression that it was just your daughter who was embarrassed. The more I read it though, it looks like you were embarrassed. Add to this the fact that it doesn't seem to be clear what the woman did that you made you feel this way. Your story has changed from not even noticing her, to watching her sauntering in and popping them out.

If she was sitting there feeding her child with both breasts uncovered, that would be just plain exhibitionism in my opinion, and in that situation I would feel uncomfortable. If she had one breast out, I would just take it for what it is, a woman feeding her child.

Chinafoot

CDfm wrote: »

I didnt use the word slutty but it wouldnt have been too far from the mark here. Discreet -hell no.

What I find most horrifying about this thread is your complete inability to desexualise breasts. You clearly only see them as objects for sexual pleasure. That is an issue all of your own and tbh you sound like one of those teenage boys you keep referring to.

The context of the exposure is whats important. She was feeding her child, she was not getting them out to show off to you, the teenagers or anyone else.

Slutty? Are you for real? Sensationalist language that says far more about you than it ever will about that woman. Get your woman issues sorted before they seriously harm your daughter.

fatmammycat

Warfi wrote: »

The first part of this thread, I got the impression that it was just your daughter who was embarrassed. The more I read it though, it looks like you were embarrassed. Add to this the fact that it doesn't seem to be clear what the woman did that you made you feel this way. Your story has changed from not even noticing her, to watching her sauntering in and popping them out.

If she was sitting there feeding her child with both breasts uncovered, that would be just plain exhibitionism in my opinion, and in that situation I would feel uncomfortable. If she had one breast out, I would just take it for what it is, a woman feeding her child.

Exactly Warfi, the story has changed dramatically from start to finish and I'm going to step out and call it a night. CDfm, seriously, desexualise breasts for your daughter's sake. Or at the very least let her know breastfeeding is not an 'EW' action.

shellyboo

CDfm wrote: »

I am not a bra expert and it wasnt a maternity bra. If it was Mothercare are getting very daring since Ive been there.

I just cant get this, its my fault, my daughters fault, the young lads fault, if anyone had asked her to cover up a bit it would have been their fault and Irish societies fault.

I would have though some of you fine people would have suggestions on what is appropriate behavior for nursing mothers which is how it should be for everyones comfort. Since when is a discussion verboten.

Everyone's already said "as long as it's discreet it's fine". We're trying to discover if this woman WAS discreet, but you're being unbelievably evasive. So much so that it seems like you're making stuff up, tbh. If you're not, you have a really awful memory - why not just tell us wtf happened??

Was it a pub or a restaurant?
Was she eating there or did she come in to feed the baby?
Did you notice her or not?
How do you know what she did or did not do with her bra?
Did she have one breast out or two? One side of the bra unhooked or both? (Hard to uncover one boob and not the other from your clothes, tbh.)
Was there nipple on show? One or both?
What were the young lads doing that made your daughter so uncomfortable?
What exactly did you say in response to your daughter's comment?


We can't exactly renounce this woman's behaviour as awful and exhibitionist when you won't tell us what happened... one minute she was simply breastfeeding, the next she's making a show of herself. Explain, and you may find people agree with you!

CDfm

fatmammycat wrote: »

Strawman, I never said that at all and don't think it.

You have been reading too much into stuff.

Its wasnt particularily about this woman and her OTT behavior and I couldnt really care if she wants to do that every day.

If you can see beyond the event and discuss whats what maybe guys can get an idea of whats what in the scheme of things.

Cadiz

Imagine what this scenario might have been like from that woman:

You're feeding your baby, you have two eejity hormonal teenagers ogling at you; another teenage girl reacting because she's uncomfortable at their behaviour. And then, to add to the delights of the afternoon, the teenage girl's middle-aged dad with the 'I see a blonde with her boobs out' mid-life crisis on the go is pretending to be 'cool' with it all while getting into a lather about seeing a bit of breast.

Like you don't have enough to deal with as a nursing mother already without that.

CDfm

shellyboo wrote: »

Everyone's already said "as long as it's discreet it's fine". We're trying to discover if this woman WAS discreet,

Well she wasnt.

Was it a pub or a restaurant?

Resterauntg/f and older son in the pub and swilling pints.g/f has an unhealthy interest in the rugby.

Was she eating there or did she come in to feed the baby?

She came in and wasnt eating there.

Did you notice her or not?

Noticed the tempo and tones changing

How do you know what she did or did not do with her bra?

I wasnt staring but both breasts were visable.

Did she have one breast out or two? One side of the bra unhooked or both? (Hard to uncover one boob and not the other from your clothes, tbh.)

Both blouse open

Was there nipple on show? One or both?

Well both boobs were.

What were the young lads doing that made your daughter so uncomfortable?

Just guy stuff - comments -laughteretc

What exactly did you say in response to your daughter's comment?

Probably something like I would like to see her do that outside.

We can't exactly renounce this woman's behaviour as awful and exhibitionist when you won't tell us what happened... one minute she was simply breastfeeding, the next she's making a show of herself. Explain, and you may find people agree with you!

I was never really bothered about the breast feeding just her state of undress while doing so tbh if she was in a nightclub there would have been a chorus of phwoaaar.

CDfm

Cadiz wrote: »

Imagine what this scenario might have been like from that woman:

You're feeding your baby, you have two eejity hormonal teenagers ogling at you;

Hey -she attracted attention

another teenager girl reacting because she's uncomfortable at their behaviour. And then, to add to the delights of the afternoon,

in fairness - with a couple of snide comments we just had lunch -but skipped desert

the teenage girl's middle-aged dad with the 'I see a blonde with her boobs out' mid-life crisis on the go is pretending to be 'cool' with it all while getting into a lather about seeing a bit of breast

. i dont pretend to be cool - i am cool.;)

Like you don't have enough to deal with as a nursing mother already without that.

Eh - I dont think she was too bothered. But maybe some day every nursing mother will behave this way.

Chinafoot

CDfm wrote: »

tbh if she was in a nightclub there would have been a chorus of phwoaaar.

This is what I really don't get. If she had her tits out in a nightclub it would be an entirely different scenario as she wouldnt have been feeding her child. Then it would be reasonable to assume she was showing her breasts in a sexual way. In this instance it was not sexual in any way whatsoever. Its seriously disturbing that the difference is lost on you.

Like others, I don't believe for one second that both her breasts were exposed. You're changing your story to try and justify your, quite frankly, twisted view on this.

CDfm wrote: »

I was out for lunch with my 16 yo daughter when the blonde at the next table opened her blouse and whipped out a boob and started feeding her baby.

Thats your opening line. If both breasts were exposed in the manner you are now claiming you would have mentioned this in the opening post.

CDfm

Chinafoot wrote: »

Thats your opening line. If both breasts were exposed in the manner you are now claiming you would have mentioned this in the opening post.

I wasnt really that interested in the exhibitionism bit. I think from my language without being too explicit -it is fairly obvious.

So whats acceptable then -how should nursing mothers behave or is it up to themselves.

Reading the replies you would need to be mad to complain or comment.

Dr Galen

Hey Everyone

A very interesting 10 pages of reading. Can I make a few suggestions:

1) This gets discussed in a calm, rational and civil manner. Any snideness or personal attacks are not good and not going to be looked on favourably.

2) Lets stick to the topic at hand and not get diverted to side issues

3) If you think your about to post something angry/controversial etc, then write it, re-read it and step back before clicking submit.

4) If your unhappy with someone elses posting, click report and the Mods will get round to looking at it.

Cheers

MM

Dr Galen

CDfm while I think I can see why you posted here and maybe some of what you were thinking etc, dude you have to admit there are more and more holes appearing in the story.

I really think you need to set out definitively what actually happened man, because having just read the whole thread twice, I'm really not too sure, other than a baby got fed...

Cadiz

CDfm wrote: »

Hey -she attracted attention

in fairness - with a couple of snide comments we just had lunch -but skipped desert

. i dont pretend to be cool - i am cool.;)

ROFL yes your posting here amply demonstrates your 'coolness' :pac:

Let's hope, if your daughter has children and chooses to breastfeed she'll be able to do so in peace without being accused of attention seeking by tragic boobie-fixated oul fellas.

asdasd

Breasts are sexual - she knows that and they know that.

They are sexual, and good for feeding infants. In this case they were used for the latter.

If she just whipped em out without a child to feed, then the sexual thing would be foremost on her maind, and understandably yours.

I dont think it should allowable everywhere, but mostly feeding is harmless. Women hardly expose both breasts, they barely expose a nipple in most cases.

Acacia

OP, just the title of the of this thread has me in stitches. Are you seriously trying to equate breast-feeding with exhibitionism? :eek:

Frankly, your story seems to be all over the place and whatever actually happened, a woman breast-feeding her baby in public really, really shouldn't cause that much offense to mature people (speaking in general, not saying the OP is immature.)

Boobs have two purposes- for sexual pleasure and feeding babies. The teenage boys apparantly confused the two. But grown adults really should have a bit more cop on and realise that the woman wasn't getting her tits out for the lads- she was just feeding her kid.

Jesus wept. :rolleyes:

CDfm

Mystik Monkey wrote: »

CDfm while I think I can see why you posted here and maybe some of what you were thinking etc, dude you have to admit there are more and more holes appearing in the story.

I really think you need to set out definitively what actually happened man, because having just read the whole thread twice, I'm really not too sure, other than a baby got fed...

I wasnt really paying attention. Cue Saturday afternoon arrive home from garage with g/fs car. Co-ordinate kids arrival. Some off to watch the rugby me and daughter off to shops - buy thights for dance show- get ham bones for dogs - pick up some other stuff and we go to grab a bite between that and collecting our people from the rugby pub.

Grab some all day breakfasts and coffee. Dont even look around with tray to available table as you do. Guffaws - plates on table - daughter grabs cutlery and sugar - more guffaws - daughter comments -gobble gobble - see woman spot open blouse and boobs- butter toast - gulp coffee. Grab more shopping - off to collect our gang. Get home - more shopping - back home -bring daughter to Youth Club - back home go on-line while France are being creamed. Collect Daughter from youth club and all sit down to discuss Christmas plans.

So it was something that happened between the ham bones and collecting g/f and son from the pub after Irelands win. NZ beating France was great too and much more important.

I didnt take notes and didnt think till afterwards - wow when did breastfeeding like this come in and was I asleep when it happened.Half expected a bit of this is normal in modern Ireland where have you been man. Its not like I get shocked at a pair of boobs but am disappointed that I missed the opportunity to make a jedward comment. She could have been celebrating Irelands win-who knows.

CDfm

Acacia wrote: »

OP, just the title of the of this thread has me in stitches. Are you seriously trying to equate breast-feeding with exhibitionism? :eek:

not really just thought this lady didnt pretty much care.

Boobs have two purposes- for sexual pleasure and feeding babies. The teenage boys apparantly confused the two. But grown adults really should have a bit more cop on and realise that the woman wasn't getting her tits out for the lads.

And thats what it is two issues.Thanks for putting it succinctly.

Glad you liked the thread title.:)

Dr Galen

CDfm wrote: »

not really just thought this lady didnt pretty much care.


.:)

good for her

Acacia

CDfm wrote: »

not really just thought this lady didnt pretty much care.

She shouldn't have to care. And I really hope the experience of a teenage girl looking disgusted and idiot teenage boys ogling her didn't put the poor woman off feeding her baby in public.

CDfm wrote: »

And thats what it is two issues.Thanks for putting it succinctly.

Glad you liked the thread title.:)

Well, so long as those ''two issues'' aren't confused- i.e. it's clear the woman wasn't getting her boobs out for the titillation of everyone around her but to feed her kid, then what's the problem exactly?

CDfm

Acacia wrote: »

She shouldn't have to care. And I really hope the experience of a teenage girl looking disgusted and idiot teenage boys ogling her didn't put the poor woman off feeding her baby in public.

Thats ok then.

She is the adult and they are the children.

Well, so long as those ''two issues'' aren't confused- i.e. it's clear the woman wasn't getting her boobs out for the titillation of everyone around her but to feed her kid, then what's the problem exactly?

Maybe teenage boys dont behave like this if they are not put in the situation and maybe they dont understand it.

People teach children and teenagers modesty for a reason. Its not an exact science - you muddle thru it.

Anyway - I think that by leaving my daughter with her views of modesty is an ok solution for now and likevshelly suggested maybe the breastfeeding thing is something to mention if it comes around again.

Macha

CDfm wrote: »

People teach children and teenagers modesty for a reason. Its not an exact science - you muddle thru it.

What exactly is the fuction of modesty? No one has ever been able to explain it to me very well.

CDfm wrote: »

Anyway - I think that by leaving my daughter with her views of modesty is an ok solution for now and likevshelly suggested maybe the breastfeeding thing is something to mention if it comes around again.

Why? You're basically telling her that a female body is sexual first and functional second. That she should cover up and be worried about what other think of what she does and looks like, rather than her putting her own and her child's needs first. I wouldn't consider that an "ok solution".

I think female bodies are so overly sexualised in our society that we forget that MALE chest are also have a sexual function. So why the double standard that females are not allowed to show their chests in public, even if for a specific important function, but men in certain situations are allowed to show their chests in public without any specific or important function?

And what is the difference between this and certain cultures where women are expected to cover their hair but men are not? Different body parts, same double standard.

Herbal Deity

it's a self-fulfilling social norm

CDfm

Maybe the function of it relates to how others relate to you. My daughter has all the usual garb that teenage girls have, minis, shorts, the lot.

So when the Janet Jackson wardrobe malfunction thing came up during the Superbowl the objection was not about the performance but that kids copy stuff because kids are mimics.

So one function of modesty is safety.You hope your kids learn enough to make informed decisions when the time is right.