Trent

Jay P

The more I read it, the better it gets!

Trent liked women but like all his things he did not do the right things with them. Like the time he broke that man's pen inthe bank by accident. He also like to take things that weren't his. "Leave my things alone! They would say to him. But he didnt care. not a jot.

Simple but effective.

ascanbe

Dman001 wrote: »

Anyone else read this in a Rex Banner voice in their head.

Yeah. Has to be read in that 'hard - boiled, american crime fiction/noir' voice.

Mardy Bum

This stuff is golden created by some mad genius.

Jesus Wept

This book from the creative writing forum actually is hilarious and deserves all the accolades.

ToniTuddle

The-Rigger wrote: »

This book from the creative writing forum actually is hilarious and deserves all the accolades.

I shall read that thread.

But there is no denying Trent is the Man and is hilarious too.

:cool:

Sir Gallagher

AMAZING.. reminds me a lot of Garth Marenghi.

Dman001

Trent...........The Zapp Branigan of the 20th Century.


"I am the man with no name, Zapp Branigan Trent at your service."

ToniTuddle

The-Rigger wrote: »

This book from the creative writing forum actually is hilarious and deserves all the accolades.

Read it...I can see why you might like it.

But Josh is pretty crap compared to Trent.

Had to be said!

dr gonzo

Dman001 wrote: »

Trent...........The Zapp Branigan of the 20th Century.

More like the Philip Marlowe of the 21st century.

Have to agree that is story is definitely hard boiled and is plain fantastic. People saying its **** are just not reading deep enough, theres some in depth social analysis and a certain amount of satire in here im sure but damned if im smart enough to find it.

Queen-Mise

My new signature in honour of our new hero !!!!

Dman001

Ah this is just classic:

Trent wasn't sure whether he should hug him or punch him! Hug him because of the SKRRK!ing wasn't real and he knew he was safe after all, or punch him because he didn't actually like him! He shook the Corporal Jones on the hand. "Hahaha" said Corporal Jones. "Same old Trent!"

Hank_Jones

ToniTuddle wrote: »

Read it...I can see why you might like it.

But Josh is pretty crap compared to Trent.

Had to be said!

That's because Josh is based on a real person.

Trent was genetically engineered in a laboratory from the DNA of James Bond, Jason Bourne and Chuck Norris.

Sir Gallagher

Trent is Humphrey Bogart.

Dman001

dr gonzo wrote: »

More like the Philip Marlowe of the 21st century.

Have to agree that is story is definitely hard boiled and is plain fantastic. People saying its **** are just not reading deep enough, theres some in depth social analysis and a certain amount of satire in here im sure but damned if im smart enough to find it.

No has to be Zapp, the quotes fit perfectly:

"If we can hit this bullseye, all the dominos will fall like a house of cards...checkmate!" Trent thought as he took out his gun.

Mardy Bum

Trent has Shaft like qualities also.

Mardy Bum

Dman001 wrote: »

No has to be Zapp, the quotes fit perfectly:

"If we can hit this bullseye, all the dominos will fall like a house of cards...checkmate!" Trent thought as he took out his gun.

Nooooo I smell plagerism...

Sir Gallagher

Is Trent going to be in the new Sin City movie?

ToniTuddle

Hank_Jones wrote: »

That's because Josh is based on a real person.

This is true.

Josh just doesn't think as excellently (yes I'm using that as a word) as Trent :cool:

OutlawPete

ToniTuddle wrote: »

(yes I'm using that as a word) as Trent :cool:

A'Trentism'??

dsmythy

snyper wrote: »

Hes no facekicker

Face kicker would have stopped the hat hitting the floor. grabbed the gun, and kicked him in the face.

Can't wait for that episode! Trent vs Facekicker.

Hank_Jones

dsmythy wrote: »

Can't wait for that episode! Trent vs Facekicker.

Trent kicking Facekicker in the face.

Oh the ironing.

ToniTuddle

OutlawPete wrote: »

A'Trentism'??

That is an excellently brillant idea.

RHunce

Trent

ToniTuddle

That's Justin Timberlake!!
Trent doesn't look like him!!
NOOOOOO!!







Although fair play for bringing more Trent images/ideas to the publics knowledge

scotchy

The eejit broke my pen in a bank.

As far as I’m concerned he can feck right off.


.

Jako8

scotchy wrote: »

The eejit broke my pen in a bank.

As far as I’m concerned he can feck right off.


.

Bang!

scotchy

Jako8 wrote: »

Bang!

No… No Trent……not in the face…..aaaahhhhh ...


.

ashyle

Anyone that doesn't find Trent funny is no longer my friend. I read the stories aloud to my younger sister and we nearly peed ourselves laughing. "One woman had been had sex with" amazing.

Dman001

His similes are just the best. LC English students could pick up a few hints from him:http://boards.ie/vbulletin/newreply.php?do=postreply&t=2055792780

It had always been Trents problem to treat women like objects. Like a nice bookcase or a €350,000 mansion

Trent liked women but like all his things he did not do the right things with them. Like the time he broke that man's pen inthe bank by accident

The hat sat on his head like a man sitting on a park bench

CRACK! Like a mouse's spine breaking

The casino had pulled him in. Like when you pull in all the stuffing from a cushion that your naughty dog has chewed up and left on the floor and instead of shouting at the dog your mum shouts at you because you were supposed to be watching him

And my favourite:

He fell on the floor like some shopping that hadn't been doubly bagged but there was heavy shopping in the bag, so the bag ripped.

AckwelFoley

Hank_Jones wrote: »

Trent kicking Facekicker in the face.

Oh the ironing.

Facekicker takes kick to the face and laughs at the irony and then ass rapes trent.

Trent loses hardman coolness

Facekicker remains supreme

xw2lj9uspm1eyh

Thanks to the OP for bringing the thread to light.Very funny story as with everything on AH they're always gonna be haters and bashers.But I enjoyed it but i fear padraiggg has taken Trent as far as he can take him is it time for him to hang up his hat and gun?

dsmythy

snyper wrote: »

Facekicker takes kick to the face and laughs at the irony and then ass rapes trent.

Trent loses hardman coolness

Facekicker remains supreme

Facekicker doesn't ass rape. He face kicks. He's a one trick pony. Trent would win.

AckwelFoley

dsmythy wrote: »

Facekicker doesn't ass rape. He face kicks. He's a one trick pony. Trent would win.

Its the recession

He must diversify to survive

BluesBerry

If you do a boards search for trent you get 500 threads

yerayeah

I dunno what it is about it, because it shouldn't work half as well as it should but it is absolutely brilliant!

Hats off to Trent!!

banquo

I flippin' love Trent.

FlutterinBantam

ascanbe wrote: »

Yeah. Though, having read on, I might have changed my mind..'Trent sat on a log. Because of his legs were tired. CRACK! A noise went. CRACK! Like a mouse's spine breaking. Trent turned around at mouse height expecting to see one with a broke back'... if he continues creating work of this quality I may well be with Trent for the long haul.

Brokeback Mountain reference?

Is this superhero gay??

Murphyt

Trent is amazing I want to see a trent film overdubbed like naked gun

Dudess

electrogrimey wrote: »

Trent: A man who needs no more introduction.




Just thought the good people of AH deserved to know about this guy.

I know fuk all about Trent - and intend to keep it that way. Agreed with snyper - Trent will never match Facekicker.

mink_man

trent is some man for a sad man...

Kold

Dudess wrote: »

I know fuk all about Trent - and intend to keep it that way. Agreed with snyper - Trent will never match Facekicker.

Now now Dudess, I would've thought you above making decisions on things without getting the facts.

Trent is a pretty cool guy. eh kills and rapes and doesn't afraid of anything.

Bit gay in there now since all the AH heads got wind of it though

jif

Kiera wrote: »

Its a pile of ****!

...in a hat.

FearDark

"Your a woman.Normally i would either have sex with you or kill you" siad trent "but i'm out of bullets". She smiled and started walking towards him. CRACK! Trent broke her neck with a sickening karate chop that probably would of even killed a man or any animal you can think of, a lion easily. not an elephant lets not be silly but it was a hard chop.

That is the best thing I have ever read.

BluesBerry

Trent is amazing and if anyone says otherwise well..........


Snapkick


That is all

seriously we need a trent smiley with a hat

The Volt

Some serious moaners over that way in Creative Writing. Fan Fiction is a complex and diverse community, we're not just some passive bunch of robots, we're active participants in the world of Trent who enjoy re-working elements of the narrative to suit our desires. People have a natural want for continuity and closure which padraiggg the master of suspense is not providing.

I'm sorry that Trent isn't viewed favorably by the cultural hierarchy over on the Creative Writing forum but fan fiction has a new frontman.

Glico Man

Voltwad wrote: »

Some serious moaners over that way in Creative Writing. Fan Fiction is a complex and diverse community, we're not just some passive bunch of robots, we're active participants in the world of Trent who enjoy re-working elements of the narrative to suit our desires. People have a natural want for continuity and closure which padraiggg the master of suspense is not providing.

I'm sorry that Trent isn't viewed favorably by the cultural hierarchy over on the Creative Writing forum but fan fiction has a new frontman.

In my view they are all jealous

They say its rubbish?

I say Peeow

OutlawPete

aaronh007 wrote: »

In my view they are all jealous. They say its rubbish?

They laughed at Quentin Tarantino too and some still do.

All the sheep over at Creative Writing are just green with envy.

Trent would whip their spineless bodies with all of the ladies suspenders that he has fashioned together. Then drag the prettiest one to his Black 1967 Fleetwood Eldorado and push her into the boot / trunk.

Drive to an alley way and park his car where the f**k he liked and step through a door way marked exit.

Climb the dusty stairs with the only noise being Chinese kitchen workers and the sounds of faces being slapped.

At the top of the stairs a blond polish girl wipes her boyfriend off her face and tries in vain to fix her hair as she says:

''Hi Trent, you wanna beat me baby?"

"No sweetcheeks*, I'm just here for the game" is all he has to say as he makes his way through a dark door frame that has no place in this dump.

The polish girl watches Trent remove his hat and take a seat at a table where nobody looks Trent in the eye just as a topless Russian woman closes the door and winks at her.

Trent has a wad of cash in his hip pocket but decides that the 'Creative Writing' bit*h in his boot might make a more interesting stake.

Especially as Trent has no intention of winning tonight.

*Sweetcheeks appears courtesy of Zohan productions.

Kold

I like to think he shouts "Hahaha!" and shoots the girl in the face when he ejaculates.

Jay P

Can't Trent and Facekicker just kick faces and beat the crap out of people together?

mink_man

trent is the man...