A parking incident rant - abusive driver, advice please.

budfox

Folks...

Looking for any opinions or advice.

My partner was up at Tesco Artane Castle yesterday evening at tea time with our baby. The car park was completely jammers. She headed towards the parents parking area and ahead of her, a taxi pulled into the last free space. Eventually she got a space. She went up to get her trolley. In the meantime she observed a couple get out of the taxi who parked in the kids parking space but they didnt' have any children with them. She saw them again in Tesco's as they were walking in and said to them that they should not have parked in that space owing to the fact that it was specifically for parents with children. (I wouldn't have noticed myself up until recently until she said it to me but the spaces are actually bigger and it does make a difference when your trying to get the buggy and shopping into the car...!)

She was met with the most tirade of abusive language. To quote, the man said to her "Fu(k you and Fu(k your baby, I couldn't give a sh!te". The woman told her to mind her own "Fu(king business and Fu(k off". People stopped to see what the commotion was about. (My view: she was dead right to say it to them. It isn't the first time it has happened up there, only a few weeks ago I had the same ****e with a Nigerian couple. The security guards are too wimpy to do anything about it.)

I wasn't there at the time but she called me from her mobile and both her any my little fella were extremely upset. Actually, she was really shocked. I told her to say it to security but she wouldn't. Unfortunately, I was unable to make my way there as I would have decked the prick but I asked her to get his reg number which she did.

Now, I am not unreasonable, but it takes some kind of wimp to treat a woman with a child like that. You'd also ask yourself, is he the type of scumbag who should be driving a taxi?

My opinion is that if he had a roof sign on his car then he is a taxi whether his light is on or not and he comes under the regulator guidelines for appropriate conduct.

Either way, I am making a formal complaint on Monday for what I consider to be verbal assault and I will be making an objection against the renewal of his taxi licence but I'm interested in anyone's advice.

Many thanks,


BF

keefg

We don't give advice in R&R, moved to transport & commuting.

Spook_ie

Fair play to you, but I do wonder if there wasn't a taxi sign on it would you be willing to complain so vociferously?

104494431

Misleading thread title to say the least!

corktina

the worlds full of scumbags...move on....forget it...

Duckjob

A lot of people (myself included) do not hold those "family" parking spots in very high regard.

I would have ultimate respect for disabled spaces and would never park in one.

With family spaces, although I wouldn't normally park there either but TBH it irks me a little that people who have made the decision to have kids should have get preferential treatment over people who don't have any.

Also, I dont get why we think kids need to be ferried by car to as near every door as possible. It there had to walk a little more, there might not be such a serious child obesity problem ?

From that POV, I'm going to say that I don't think your partner had any right to stick her nose in. If she had a problem she should have notified shop or carpark staff. Then it's up to the shop if they want to enforce their policy strictly, and up to him and others, if they want to take their business elsewhere because of it.

He shouldn't have replied to her like that either of course, but the first "shouldn't" is on her side IMO.

Terrontress

Duckjob wrote: »

A lot of people (myself included) do not hold those "family" parking spots in very high regard.

I would have ultimate respect for disabled spaces and would never park in one.

With family spaces, although I wouldn't normally park there either but TBH it irks me a little that people who have made the decision to have kids should have get preferential treatment over people who don't have any.

Also, I dont get why we think kids need to be ferried by car to as near every door as possible. It there had to walk a little more, there might not be such a serious child obesity problem ?

From that POV, I'm going to say that I don't think your partner had any right to stick her nose in. If she had a problem she should have notified shop or carpark staff. Then it's up to the shop if they want to enforce their policy strictly, and up to him and others, if they want to take their business elsewhere because of it.

He shouldn't have replied to her like that either of course, but the first "shouldn't" is on her side IMO.

Regardless of what you think, they are the rules and if you don't like it, or any other aspect of a shop's operation, then go and shop elsewhere.

I can't see why you have "ultimate" respect for disabled spaces but not for parent and child spaces. Contrary to what you think, disabled or parent and child spaces are not to do with being as close to the door as possible. They are about shops giving a little extra space to enable a wheelchair or pram up the side of the car to get an adult or child in or out. I'd say most wheelchair-bound people would find your attitude offensive.

OP, good for your wife. Ignoring the fact that this was a taxi driver, if there were more like your wife, fewer idiots would feel they could do what they like. You should complain to the Gardai with the numberplate and leave the taxi regulator out of it.

3DataModem

Duckjob wrote: »

With family spaces, although I wouldn't normally park there either but TBH it irks me a little that people who have made the decision to have kids should have get preferential treatment over people who don't have any.

Also, I dont get why we think kids need to be ferried by car to as near every door as possible. It there had to walk a little more, there might not be such a serious child obesity problem ? .

You've completely missed the point of these car spaces. It is not about being close to the door, it's about having extra space to get the kids on and out of the car seats.

The car seats are tricky to get in and out sometimes (and are required by law). I have a twodoor car and twin babies so getting them in and out anywhere is tricky. Doing it in a normal car space is very very tricky.

If they were 300 yards from the door in tesco I'd still use them. The reason tesco put them near the door is to have as few kids walking through the car park as possible.

It is 100% about safety, the "convenience" is a coincidence.

3DataModem

Also - OP the taxi plate is irrelevant. You confronted him and paid the price - now just move on.

If you felt that strongly about it you should have asked tesco to enforce their policy, not take the opportunity to vent your annoyance.

Duckjob

Terrontress wrote: »

Regardless of what you think, they are the rules and if you don't like it, or any other aspect of a shop's operation, then go and shop elsewhere.

As I said, I normally wouldn't park there. But, for example, as in the case where the car park was full, who's to say that someone with kids has "more right" to stay and shop there than someone who doesn't. Not you, thats for sure.

Ultimately, its up to the shop, not you or me. If staff approached me while in a shop and ordered me to relocate my car I would, leaving my basket or trolley full of business there. I suspect that many others would do likewise, which is why shops wouldnt be keen to enforce it.

I can't see why you have "ultimate" respect for disabled spaces but not for parent and child spaces.

I've already explained why. One is a lifestyle choice, one isn't.

Contrary to what you think, disabled or parent and child spaces are not to do with being as close to the door as possible. They are about shops giving a little extra space to enable a wheelchair or pram up the side of the car to get an adult or child in or out.

Can't say I've ever seen these spots on the far side of a car park from the door, have you?

I'd say most wheelchair-bound people would find your attitude offensive.

Lordy. The only think I've said regarding disabled people is that I respect and don't park in the spots prepared for them. In what way is that offensive pray-tell ?

OP, good for your wife. Ignoring the fact that this was a taxi driver, if there were more like your wife, fewer idiots would feel they could do what they like. You should complain to the Gardai with the numberplate and leave the taxi regulator out of it.

Yes, I'm sure the Gardai would be all over it

Trampas

Is their anything to say that these spots can only be used by people with kids?

Unlike disable spots?

Terrontress

In what way? In your condescending insistence that this has all to do with having less distance to travel from the car to the shop. Don't forget that the wheelchair user will cover many multiples of that distance through the aisles.

Wheelchair-bound paralympians who have attained a level of fitness that I never will, still need a bit of extra space to get in and out of their cars. NOT to be up near the front door. If that is where the spaces are located, fine. It is not the most important element to them.

cuppa

hate second hand storys. Should of minded her own,might of been collecting 10 babys .who knows.

Duckjob

3DataModem wrote: »

You've completely missed the point of these car spaces. It is not about being close to the door, it's about having extra space to get the kids on and out of the car seats.

The car seats are tricky to get in and out sometimes (and are required by law). I have a twodoor car and twin babies so getting them in and out anywhere is tricky. Doing it in a normal car space is very very tricky.

If they were 300 yards from the door in tesco I'd still use them. The reason tesco put them near the door is to have as few kids walking through the car park as possible.

It is 100% about safety, the "convenience" is a coincidence.

Point taken about the extra space, however;

If, as was in the OP's case, the car park is full and the one spot apparently available is one of these, do you think people with kid(s) have "automatic right" to stay and shop, while those without should have to go elsewhere?

corktina

these spaces arent enforcible by law, as a matter of courtesy and self-respect, they should be honoured.

Terrontress

Duckjob wrote: »

Point taken about the extra space, however;

If, as was in the OP's case, the car park is full and the one spot apparently available is one of these, do you think people with kid(s) have "automatic right" to stay and shop, while those without should have to go elsewhere?

As I said, it's the rules of the shop. If you don't like it, and any other of their rules, then shop elsewhere. The parent and child spaces do not give families the right to shop. Only to park. If there are no other spaces then it is obviously a small car park so go and park nearby and then walk to the shop from where your car is. Alternatively wait a few minutes. And if you are forced to go to another shop altogether, perhaps the supermarket will increase their parking if there are more like you.

You obviously don't have kids. Can I ask how old you are?

Terrontress

corktina wrote: »

these spaces arent enforcible by law, as a matter of courtesy and self-respect, they should be honoured.

I don't believe disabled spaces on private land are either. I'd say they are enforceable by a clamp though.

BluntGuy

Duckjob wrote: »

A lot of people (myself included) do not hold those "family" parking spots in very high regard.

Which is exactly why incidents like this happen!

bohsboy

Sadly, this is the Ireland we live in now. If you confront somebody over an issue these days, you risk outcomes like this or worse. :mad:

DWCommuter

I love the hangover induced anger from the goody two shoes, life style choosing, childless people here.:D May I apologise now for having disgusting little children that require buggies, changing rooms and car parking facilities that assist me ferrying them around. God bless their little legs. Why do we even encourage them to take their first steps.:rolleyes:

So Duckjob, I'll do my best to keep them out of your way, but forgive me for raring them to have a better set of principles than you.

As for the OP, I sympathise completely. But remember that having children is now regarded by some as offensive if it entitles you to any special treatment. :eek: And you came to the wrong internet forum for an understanding ear.;)

A question though. I assume one of the couple that got out of the Taxi was the driver. So is it not illegal to use your taxi for a private/personal function?

Terrontress

bohsboy wrote: »

Sadly, this is the Ireland we live in now. If you confront somebody over an issue these days, you risk outcomes like this or worse. :mad:

But good for those people who do it.

A while ago at the Super Valu in Donabate, I saw a guy and his wife pull straight in to the disabled space and get out of their car. Nothing wrong with him. I was heading in to the shop at the same time. I tutted to myself but said nothing.

As I was coming out, I saw a guy with a wheelchair having to park beside the recycle bins as it was the only place he could guarantee the space to get out. I then wished I had challenged that moron parking in the disabled space.

Terrontress

DWCommuter wrote: »

I love the hangover induced anger from the goody two shoes, life style choosing, childless people here.:D May I apologise now for having disgusting little children that require buggies, changing rooms and car parking facilities that assist me ferrying them around. God bless their little legs. Why do we even encourage them to take their first steps.:rolleyes:

So Duckjob, I'll do my best to keep them out of your way, but forgive me for raring them to have a better set of principles than you.

As for the OP, I sympathise completely. But remember that having children is now regarded by some as offensive if it entitles you to any special treatment. :eek: And you came to the wrong internet forum for an understanding ear.;)

A question though. I assume one of the couple that got out of the Taxi was the driver. So is it not illegal to use your taxi for a private/personal function?

I believe it is, due to the reduced rate of road tax. And you can bet they drove up the bus lane to get to the shops. And smoked inside the taxi. And paid for the shopping with cash from the taxi which the taxman will never learn of.

But will anything be done about any of that? Not a chance.

spurious

corktina wrote: »

these spaces arent enforcible by law, as a matter of courtesy and self-respect, they should be honoured.

Alas, courtesy and self-respect are the main two qualities scummers lack.

Green Back

DWCommuter wrote: »

I love the hangover induced anger from the goody two shoes, life style choosing, childless people here.:D May I apologise now for having disgusting little children that require buggies, changing rooms and car parking facilities that assist me ferrying them around. God bless their little legs. Why do we even encourage them to take their first steps.

Maybe there should be parking spaces for people with hangovers? Or people who don't wont to walk too far. God bless these people who have to go through the inconvience of using a supermarket car park when they're not at their best. With their trolleys and bags, fancy using a trolly - with their little wheels. Car parking spaces are too narrow when I dont have the kids with me.

Terrontress

Green Back wrote: »

Car parking spaces are too narrow when I dont have the kids with me.

Well then get Tesco online to deliver.

Green Back

Terrontress wrote: »

Well then get Tesco online to deliver.

Just when I dont have the kids?

Terrontress

Green Back wrote: »

Just when I dont have the kids?

you could always hit the gym, lose a few kilos and see if the parking spaces are wide enough for you then!

corktina

spurious wrote: »

Alas, courtesy and self-respect are the main two qualities scummers lack.

"amongst the main qualities that scummers lack are" to paraphrase Mr Python

dsane1

"A while ago at the Super Valu in Donabate, I saw a guy and his wife pull straight in to the disabled space and get out of their car. Nothing wrong with him. I was heading in to the shop at the same time. I tutted to myself but said nothing.

As I was coming out, I saw a guy with a wheelchair having to park beside the recycle bins as it was the only place he could guarantee the space to get out. I then wished I had challenged that moron parking in the disabled space"(QUOTE )

I did ask a lady in cavan did she really need the space ,as she was running into the supermarket . HER REPLY was that her husband was disabled and she was entitled to park there even though he was not with her . Now surely she should realise the problem she is causing to someone who needs the space . Why bother anymore ? I DONT !

Taxipete29

dsane1 wrote: »

"A while ago at the Super Valu in Donabate, I saw a guy and his wife pull straight in to the disabled space and get out of their car. Nothing wrong with him. I was heading in to the shop at the same time. I tutted to myself but said nothing.

As I was coming out, I saw a guy with a wheelchair having to park beside the recycle bins as it was the only place he could guarantee the space to get out. I then wished I had challenged that moron parking in the disabled space"(QUOTE )

I did ask a lady in cavan did she really need the space ,as she was running into the supermarket . HER REPLY was that her husband was disabled and she was entitled to park there even though he was not with her . Now surely she should realise the problem she is causing to someone who needs the space . Why bother anymore ? I DONT !

Shes not actually.

Anyway back to op. Fact the person was a Taxi driver is irrelevant. Complain to Gardai or to centre management at the time of incident.

If you knew the person worked in a certain shop or restaurant would you go in there and complain to their boss to get them into trouble??

The abusers are obviously scumbags for attacking your partners verballly like that but if you are willing to confront people you have to be prepared for the fact they probably arent very nice and an attack is likely.I dont think that this is right but it is a reality

Cookie_Monster

The abusive attitude was of course wrong and they should have been pulled up about that, by security or even bystanders

However those stupid mother and child spots are totally unenforcable and have no legal standing and can be parked in by anyone quite unlike disabled bays.

Cookie_Monster

DWCommuter wrote: »

I love the hangover induced anger from the goody two shoes, life style choosing, childless people here.:D May I apologise now for having disgusting little children that require buggies, changing rooms and car parking facilities that assist me ferrying them around. God bless their little legs. Why do we even encourage them to take their first steps.:rolleyes:

So Duckjob, I'll do my best to keep them out of your way, but forgive me for raring them to have a better set of principles than you.

You go right ahead and do that

Fighting Irish

She was lucky, she didn't know these people and she confronted them about a stupid parking space

Terrontress

Cookie_Monster wrote: »

The abusive attitude was of course wrong and they should have been pulled up about that, by security or even bystanders

However those stupid mother and child spots are totally unenforcable and have no legal standing and can be parked in by anyone quite unlike disabled bays.

what do you mean "uneforcable"? They are on private land and are subject to the bye-laws of the owners of that land.

Do you think that parking within the defined spaces in private car parks is also "unenforcable"?

Dont be at yourself

However did parents manage to get kids in and out the car ten years ago, when these ridiculous spaces didn't exist?

me_right_one

spurious wrote: »

Alas, courtesy and self-respect are the main two qualities scummers lack.

Terrontress wrote: »

you could always hit the gym, lose a few kilos and see if the parking spaces are wide enough for you then!

Add lack of respect for others to that list aswell




OP, do gooding tends to get that reaction from people. Being judgemental without knowing the circumstances is a recipe for a smack. That couple could have been picking up a child, who knows? Either way, I agree they shouldn't have been abusive to your wife, but maybe she should be a bit more thoughtful in future.

BluntGuy

NekkidBibleMan wrote: »

However did parents manage to get kids in and out the car ten years ago, when these ridiculous spaces didn't exist?

Mother and child spaces are perfectly valid in my view, they are limited in number and have a justified existence.

There are no logical arguments not to have them, and to not respect the wishes of the car park owners. Ultimately it always comes down to individual selfishness and lack of empathy.

Duckjob

.

Duckjob

DWCommuter wrote: »

I love the hangover induced anger from the goody two shoes, life style choosing, childless people here.:D May I apologise now for having disgusting little children that require buggies, changing rooms and car parking facilities that assist me ferrying them around. God bless their little legs. Why do we even encourage them to take their first steps.:rolleyes:

Mhhhh, ok. Nice assumptions.

I was actually making a point as to why someone with kids should be afforded rights over someone who doesn't.

But if it makes you feel better to take it as a personal attack against your little cherubs, go right ahead

So Duckjob, I'll do my best to keep them out of your way, but forgive me for raring them to have a better set of principles than you.

Again, instead of attacking me based on what you think you know about my principles, perhaps you'd like to address my question as to why, in a full car park, somebody with kids should get the preference to park and someone without kids is expected to turn around and go elsewhere.

As for the OP, I sympathise completely. But remember that having children is now regarded by some as offensive if it entitles you to any special treatment. :eek: And you came to the wrong internet forum for an understanding ear.;)

Predictable....

kenco

Those people who are ignorant enough to park in disabled or parent&kid spots are pretty much going to be ignornant when their behaviours is challenged. Nothing to do with being a taxi or what ever simply the nature of the beast.

The good news is however that this (family parking) is beginning to get much more enforced. Around a year back in Dundrum I noticed several drivers being told to move their cars out of spots there were not meant to be in or be clamped. Amazing how these dolts sheepishly back down with any threat. You me or Joe Soap gets the abuse though.

As for Parent and Child parking being legite its all down the shops in question to police. If they want families shopping with them (and by God they do) then they will have these spots with space and close to the entrance to gain their business (and very full shopping trolleys). Money talks and the clamping will continue!!!

Arathorn

I don't park in the family spots but I agree they are stupid, they are not on the same necessety level as the disabled spaces. When they are all full do people with kids turn around and go home? No they don't, they park elsewhere and still manage just fine.

BluntGuy

Arathorn wrote: »

I don't park in the family spots but I agree they are stupid, they are not on the same necessety level as the disabled spaces.

Nobody argued they were on the same level.

When they are all full do people with kids turn around and go home? No they don't, they park elsewhere and still manage just fine.

Yes, out of necessity, they will find alternative parking and they will manage to complete their shopping.

But why should people make the task unnecessarily more difficult for them by parking in the few spaces that make that task easier and take the pressure off.

I don't think the spaces are "stupid" at all. I wouldn't argue that they are absolutely, 100% necessary, and only a small number of overall spaces should be designated as mother and child (<5%, which is typically the case), but they are there for a perfectly valid reason and people should respect that.

BluntGuy

Duckjob wrote: »

Again, instead of attacking me based on what you think you know about my principles, perhaps you'd like to address my question as to why, in a full car park, somebody with kids should get the preference to park and someone without kids is expected to turn around and go elsewhere.

Why should a mother have to unnecessarily struggle to get a pram, shopping and crying baby in and out of her car just so you can get to the shops 2 minutes quicker?

Duckjob

BluntGuy wrote: »

Why should a mother have to unnecessarily struggle to get a pram, shopping and crying baby in and out of her car just so you can get to the shops 2 minutes quicker?

Reading fail. I'll highlight the most important parts for you:

Again, instead of attacking me based on what you think you know about my principles, perhaps you'd like to address my question as to why, IN A FULL CAR PARK, somebody with kids should get the preference to park AND SOMEONE WITHOUT KIDS IS EXPECTED TO TURN AROUND AND GO ELSEWHERE.

JHMEG

I don't have a problem with leaving the parent & child parking spaces to someone who needs them more than I do, and turning around and parking elsewhere.

It's called courtesy, and is something my parents taught me.

Arathorn

To be fair to most people here they are not saying they take those spaces, just that they don't agree with them in principle.

BluntGuy

Duckjob wrote: »

Reading fail. I'll highlight the most important parts for you:

Thanks but I saw perfectly well what you wrote the first time, and answered you within my own return question.

However, since that was seemingly beyond your comprehension, I'll explain in more detail.

What are some of reasons parents with small children get what you call "preferential treatment"?

• It is very awkward to get small children, prams, shopping in and out of cars in narrow spaces, especially when adjacent vehicles are parked badly (which is nearly all of the time in this country)
• The proximity to the store makes it a lot safer for the child/children and their parents and reduces the workload of pushing a heavy buggy, shopping etc.
• If a child is left in the car (if parents want to quickly run into the store and grab something), then parents can in many cases still see inside the car from the store windows.

Now let's see a list of reasons why you, the person with no kids, should be allowed that spot over them, and they should be forced to turn around and struggle:

• It gets you to the store 2 minutes faster.

Ultimately, it all comes down to selfishness. You have NO valid reasons to disparage parents getting these priority spaces. YES, they can "manage" with regular ones, but equally so, YOU can manage walking an extra hundred metres to get to the store. It causes you a lot less inconvenience and stress than it causes them.

DWCommuter

Mhhhh, ok. Nice assumptions.

I was actually making a point as to why someone with kids should be afforded rights over someone who doesn't.

But if it makes you feel better to take it as a personal attack against your little cherubs, go right ahead

My god you are an angry little duck. I didn't take it as a personal attack on my little "cherubs". Ive only one anyway. Most of the time the "child/baby and parent spaces" in my local SC are full. There's only 3 of them. I don't complain about it. Its still a fairly new concept. I park elsewhere and struggle with getting the "cherub" out of the car seat. Now thats not an exaggeration in any shape or form. Ive used the word "struggle". Thats why somebody very clever came up with the concept of wider parking bays for people with young children in car seats. Children that cannot get out of their seats (which are a legal requirement) so have to be lifted out. If you can't open the door fully, then its a struggle. Do you understand that Ducky? Have you tried it? Do you have any experience in doing this?

Clever people all over the world come up with all kinds of helpful inventions and concepts to make life a little easier. Double buggies, double seated shopping trollies and now the wonderful baby/parent parking bay. Its intended to improve the experience for parents who decide or have to bring a young car seat dependent child with them. They take up a tiny perecentage of parking spaces in car parks that have a quick rate of turnover and people like you have a problem with it. You really should evaluate your opinions on very trivial matters like this because you have come across with some pretty laughable and pathetic opinions already.

Again, instead of attacking me based on what you think you know about my principles, perhaps you'd like to address my question as to why, in a full car park, somebody with kids should get the preference to park and someone without kids is expected to turn around and go elsewhere.

Your principles are represented by the comments you have made on this thread.

Ive addressed the question above and remember if these baby/parent bays are full (they usually are) we manage elsewhere in more difficult circumstances. Just like you we have to search for other spaces and usually find them quick enough which should be the case with you. Unless of course you have no patience and begrudge the "limited" facility provided to parents and young children as a result and that looks the likely scenario.

Quack quack.

Victor

NekkidBibleMan wrote: »

However did parents manage to get kids in and out the car ten years ago, when these ridiculous spaces didn't exist?

With the kids smacking the door off the next car.

Duckjob wrote: »

I was actually making a point as to why someone with kids should be afforded rights over someone who doesn't.

Because there are more of them.

oisindoyle

Jeez some people just complain for the sake of complaining ?
The fact that the person driving the CAR had a taxi plate is irrelevant .
The OP wife was NOT a paying passenger in the taxi at the time ,so wanting to complain to the TR and then wanting to ensure his licence cannot be renewed is bad minded .Not only that but you havent a leg to stand on with your complaint,it wasnt /isnt a taxi incident ..Forget it
You also stated that the taxi drivers wife/girlfriend was abusive as well ,so tell me this who exactly are you going to report her to ?
Yes being abusive to someone is not polite ,but in all fairness your wife should have said nothing to them at all and maybe just maybe if she was that narked about the whole incidident re parking ,she should have told a security guard .
I would have to agree with a lot of people above though when they said "get over it move on "

Calina

Oh my this thread is a tad on the tetchy side.