Right.. can I get a ride out of this?

brummytom

I know AH can help.

There's this girl. There's a prom. There's me, who likes her. She has a boyfriend, but he doesn't go to our school so he's not allowed to the prom. There's a big palava with all my mates hating her, but this is basically the summary.

She wants to get the limo with me; me and her have got pretty close recently. My mates aren't cock-blocks, so they agreed to let her come, despite hating her with a passion. But riding in a car with her isn't enough...

I need some ingenius ways to get my end in. Preferably without the use of rohypnol - I'm not made of money.

m@cc@

brummytom wrote: »

I need some ingenius ways to get my end in. Preferably without the use of rohypnol - I'm not made of money.

Is she strong?

Overheal

I need some ingenius ways to get my end in.

Wouldnt that be completely backwards? edit: wouldnt that just be buttcheek on buttcheek?

TheZohanS

tl;dr

brummytom is looking for a cheap alternative to roofies.

brummytom

Overheal wrote: »

Wouldnt that be completely backwards?

I'm not quite sure what you mean Overheal

I think to try anal straight away would be pushing it

admiralofthefleet

duct tape and a bag of lime wont break the bank.

Karoma

brummytom wrote: »

I need some ingenius ways to get my end in. Preferably without the use of rohypnol - I'm not made of money.

Not being mean, but... be someone else completely.

Insect Overlord

I'll tell you when you're older :pac:

Buford T Justice

Run her down with the train, that'll subdue her and she'll be all yours.....

Rented Mule

Do you think she could out drink you ??

Abi

brummytom wrote: »

I'm not quite sure what you mean Overheal

I think to try anal straight away would be pushing it

Well just to be all polite-like, ask her if she'd like lube. Shes bound to say no, but it'll make you look good

m@cc@

Karoma wrote: »

Not being mean, but... be someone else completely.

The first part doesn't negate the second, just to let you know.

John I am

Easy mate just tell her you will respect her in the morning, that works for me everytime.

ScumLord

Grow a moustache, get a smoking jacket and learn how to smoke.

brummytom

Rented Mule wrote: »

Do you think she could out drink you ??

She doesn't drink, which is an annoyance

Abi

m@cc@ wrote: »

The first part doesn't negate the second, just to let you know.

I don't mean to be mean.. but are you in the right forum?

brummytom

Karoma wrote: »

Not being mean, but... be someone else completely.

That's just mean


Very true



But mean

Oneironaut

First mistake: calling it the 'prom'. Now tons of unlikely events will somehow combine to stop you from having the ideal night, instead your transition from boyhood to manhood will be made painfully aware to you, and you'll realise that relationships are complicated. You'll be an indie hit, but you'll be unknown pretty soon and starring in straight to DVD comedies.

Overheal

brummytom wrote: »

She doesn't drink, which is an annoyance

No Alchohol, No Roofies, No substance abuse?'

Dear lord: You might have to rely on charm and wit! :eek:

John I am

You sound a regular charmer how could she resist

brummytom

Overheal wrote: »

No Alchohol, No Roofies, No substance abuse?'

Dear lord: You might have to rely on charm and wit! :eek:

Fuck




Whenever I'm witty or charming people just think I'm queer.. that might not be the best approach

Karoma

m@cc@ wrote: »

The first part doesn't negate the second, just to let you know.

If it works for racist and sexist people, why not me? You hatin'! You must be a woman.

Seriously though, she'll just assume he's leaning in for a hug or it's for a bet: she knows he's gay.

admiralofthefleet

John I am wrote: »

You sound a regular charmer how could she resist

you dont know the half of it

m@cc@

Abigayle wrote: »

I don't mean to be mean.. but are you in the right forum?

I don't give a toss if you're mean or not, it's the internet baby!

Overheal

John I am wrote: »

You sound a regular charmer how could she resist

Well thats the wonderful thing about Oxytocin: You can't resist.

Good luck getting her to take the nasal spray though. Heard about it in PopSci as a way to get information during interrogations.

m@cc@

Karoma wrote: »

If it works for racist and sexist people, why not me? You hatin'! You must be a woman.

Seriously though, she'll just assume he's leaning in for a hug or it's for a bet: she knows he's gay.

Nah, I just don't like when people use terms like 'no offence'.

Local-womanizer

Dont forget to get the boyfriend out of the picture.

Id say run him down in the limo on the way to said prom,once she shes her dead,bloody boyfriend lying in a heap=easy grieving sex

grudgebringer

As a once (in)famous boardie said before

Kick her in the face

That'll work every time

c0rk3r

brummytom wrote: »

she has a boyfriend

What youre doing is pretty scummy behaviour tbh

brummytom

Username-in-use wrote: »

What youre doing is pretty scummy behaviour tbh

Hi, I'm Tom. You don't come round these parts much, do you?

Karoma

brummytom wrote: »

Hi, I'm Tom. You don't come round these parts much, do you?

A.K.A. _Faithless_

TheZohanS

brummytom wrote: »

She doesn't drink, which is an annoyance

Bring someone else, seriously.

ham_n_mustard

Username-in-use wrote: »

What youre doing is pretty scummy behaviour tbh

Your point is....?

brummytom

Karoma wrote: »

A.K.A. _Faithless_

Eh? Is that your DJ name or are you accusing me of being that nutter?

GLaDOS

Username-in-use wrote: »

What youre doing is pretty scummy behaviour tbh

Yeah, seriously, go for someone single

m@cc@

Local-womanizer wrote: »

Dont forget to get the boyfriend out of the picture.

Id say run him down in the limo on the way to said prom,once she shes her dead,bloody boyfriend lying in a heap=easy grieving sex

'Local-womanizer' - Location: Donegal. I'm thinking Declan Moffet.

brummytom

ScienceNerd wrote: »

Yeah, seriously, go for someone single

Ahh she's always falling out with him, they're only still together because she can't be arsed to break up with him. I'm the one she whinges at or laughs with, and I like her a lot

Milky Moo

In all fairness AH can be scummy doesn't excuse you being scummy...and what's with the immediate jump to sex.
I mean have you even kissed her yet, wouldn't you be trying to tick that off the list first....

BAH! *Walks off mumbling under her breath*

we'llallhavetea_old

just use subliminal messages

"you look absolutely gorgeous tonight (suck my cock)"

"oooh, where did you get that fab dress (let me lob it in your ar$e)"

works a treat

pickarooney

Defend her honour when your mates start having a go at her. Then you'll have no friends, her boyfriend riled at you and you'll be right into the friend zone with this little chicklet.

Now you have some good material for a blues song (or a whole album even). Couple this with some substance abuse and you'll be beating the women off with a stick.

Or beating yourself off with a sock, either way...

TheZohanS

Username-in-use wrote: »

What youre doing is pretty scummy behaviour tbh

Do you want me to post a link of what you proposed to do for New Years Eve, with your main account, and let users decide which was worse?

Hyperbullet

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

just use subliminal messages

"you look absolutely gorgeous tonight (suck my cock)"

"oooh, where did you get that fab dress (let me lob it in your ar$e)"

works a treat

Men dont think like that at all! How dare you!

....i'll get me coat..

Milky Moo

TheZohan wrote: »

Do you want me to post a link of what you proposed to do for New Years Eve with your main account and let users decide which was worse?

How do you know all this off hand?.....WITCH!

Local-womanizer

m@cc@ wrote: »

'Local-womanizer' - Location: Donegal. I'm thinking Declan Moffet.

I got ya a bag of oranges!!!!!!!!!!

JAYUS!!!Theres not a pick on you!!!

Celly Smunt

just get a slut,concentrate on her after,at least you won't be the only one without a wet one

Abi

Hold your fire ffs folks. The shit thing about life is, you've to go through shit things to learn wtf its all about.

brummytom wrote: »

Ahh she's always falling out with him, they're only still together because she can't be arsed to break up with him. I'm the one she whinges at or laughs with, and I like her a lot

Tricky thing is, even though things look like they are heading for the exit, you're gonna have to let it happen all by itself. If you start showing an interest in her, he could get jealous, then she gets the attention she was looking for and its curtains for you mate.

Cutting the long story out - you're gonna have to sit it out

Overheal

TheZohan wrote: »

Do you want me to post a link of what you proposed to do for New Years Eve, with your main account, and let users decide which was worse?

I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do I Do

admiralofthefleet

lay it on the line

say 'dont let this lovely night turn into a rape'

Abi

*swoon*

Soooo poetic Admiral... :pac:

My name is URL

Travel back in time and get her pregnant so she has the baby on the night of the prom

then move to Albert Square

Sofaspud

brummytom wrote: »

I'm the one she whinges at

Tom, you're young, I need to be blunt here.

Have you ever heard of "The Friend Zone"?