I'm not a parent myself

branie

but did anyone see that documentary, "leaving home at 8" on channel 4 on thursday night, about four girls going to boarding school for the first time?

Ronan Keating

No

Billiejo

Everyone is entitled to own opinion, re-the issue in question. Mine is:
Un-natural child rearing practice leading to Sensery deprivation in persuit of Academia.

metrovelvet

I saw part of it. This is more south if england weirdness. The weirdest people on the planet.

triggermortis

didnt see it

gcgirl

Some of the mothers were against it as for the fathers were for it and as for the girls they missed their mums and not their fathers i think it says a lot, I have a nine yr old and theres no way i'd could do that to her!

nienna2010

I couldn't do it. I wouldn't send my child to boarding school at all. I was a day boarder at a boarding school in my last few schooling years and my friends boarding were detached from their families having been boarders since they were young.

the_syco

Didn't see the program, but often there are day-boarders, and full-boaders at boarding schools, so you can't tar all who send their kids there with the one brush.

gcgirl

the_syco wrote: »

Didn't see the program, but often there are day-boarders, and full-boaders at boarding schools, so you can't tar all who send their kids there with the one brush.

I think you actually have to watch the program to understand this thread.

branie

If you looked at it from the perspective of the mothers, you would know that it was very difficult for them

ash23

I saw it a few months ago and I remember thinking it was awful.

But then I watched a program where a wealthy family sponsered a family for a year and after that they arranged for the kids to get private schooling. They were living in a council flat in London I think, in a really rough area and when the family first intervened the kids didn't even have beds, just matresses on the floor. The family helped them for a year and then organised for them to be sent to a private boarding school. And I thought "wow, what an opportunity for those kids".

So while I think I would struggle to be parted from my daughter, if someone knocked on the door and offered to pay for her to attend one of the best schools in the country as a boarder (an opportunity I could never offer her), I think I would do it as it would be a good opportunity for her.

It's hard to say.

metrovelvet

They have done studies on boys in England sent to boarding school and linked it with developments of high dissociation.

gbee

gcgirl wrote: »

fathers were for it and as for the girls they missed their mums and not their fathers i think it says a lot,

Making too much of this statement, facts are that girls grow up to love their dad more.

Also in the rest of the world we tend to use crèches and PRE-BLOODY school as baby sitting services. !!!!! So mum can have her freedom too.

At least when there is a complete break, marriages can get on with the cuddle bits ~ don't know it too much

miss no stars

Personally, I would have loved to have been sent to boarding school at 8 - I think it depends on the child. There were some fiercly independent girls in that programme who did really well once they settled in.

I was watching this programme with my dad whose comment was "God, that would have been perfect for you". I was quite independent myself (wouldn't be walked to the door of my playschool aged 2 as I was all grown up) as a child. On the other hand, my brother was a very clingy child and very unsure of himself etc and we both agreed it would have killed him. I think it's the making of some kids and the breaking of others. It would have broken my brother's heart but would have compeltely enthralled me.

Anything wrong with it? If it's done for the wrong reasons to the wrong child then yes. But look at some of those families. Weren't they ALL miliary families who just wanted some stability for their kids? Personally, if my child was up to it, I'd send them there for stability and continuity in their education rather than moving them all around the country every year.

Grawns

My 12 year old niece is off to boarding school in september. She is the definition of a lonely only child and is currently thriving at the gaeltacht. She hates her own company and thrives on action. Would hardly watch tv on her own let alone read a book. For this reason I think it will be a huge success. She has a cousin there to look out for her. Howver it will be a big adjustment and if she is truly misrerable after a year she can jack it in.

Saying that I went out with a guy whose parents sent him to bs when he was 8 and he had no relationship with them at all and lots of issues.

Chuchoter

Boarding school at 12? I know people who loved it and it suits some people down to the ground. At 8? They must hate their kids, I mean at 8 they're babies. I can't imagine the issues with abandonment and alienation you'd grow up with.

Cat Melodeon

Definitely depends on the reasons for sending the child. Some do well because they come from a happy loving home where the parents only want to secure the best possible education for their child. Others coming from the same type of family do very badly because they are homebirds and are injured by the separation. Some kids come from fractured or unhappy homes and either do badly because they have already been damaged by their early childhood or improve immensely because they are now out of the negative environment. Some kids thrive on it no matter what their circumstances.

Personally I think 8 is waaay too young. 13 would be the absolute minimum, they're still babies before that.